Deviant Vows by Anna Widzisz
DEVIANT GAMES
Lara
Soft music starts to echo from the walls while my brother Macsen dances with his newly-wedded wife Davina. His arms wrap around her as she looks up at her with such gentleness. I notice her smiling as Macsen mutters something to her. They look so happy together as if both have been smitten by each other since their first meeting.
But I know it isn’t real. None of it is.
It is all a façade, and they are playing in front of all these guests. My brother is one of the most ruthless men whose only aim is to rule, and although this is the first time I have met Davina, the things I’ve heard about her don’t make her sound like an innocent and polite woman. Even though she is faking it so well.
Just seeing the two of them like this makes me think about my own wedding, too. I am twenty-two now. By the end of this year, I might get married. If my family waits any longer, then it won’t take much time for people to start spreading rumours about me. Who knows, maybe my father already has someone fixed in his mind to get me married with?
I just hope it’s not the jerk he made me come here with. Because I haven’t seen him since the ceremony in the church.
When it comes to the men in the Firm, sometimes thinking of having a happy marriage seems like a scenario that can only be imagined in dreams. Macsen is an exception because I know that even though it is just a deal for him, he will treat Davina with respect.
But what about me? Would my future husband treat me the same way? Or would I end up being bound to a bond that is filled with inequality, disrespect and pain?
My eyes gaze around to find Phoenix, my so-called date at last. He could have simply said no to my father when he set him up with me, but his answer pretty much wouldn’t have mattered anyway.
Finishing my glass of champagne, I look back at the newlyweds while my mind wanders off to the possibilities of having a better, normal life someday. Even though deep down I know it is impossible.
I hear someone snicker beside me. I instantly glance to the side and find a woman facing me with an amused expression as if she is finding something very entertaining.
“Excuse me, is something wrong?” I ask.
She sips on her champagne and focuses entirely on me. Suddenly, I feel paralysed by her ocean blue eyes. Her warm ivory skin looks absolutely flawless… So perfect. She has put on light makeup with a nude shade lipstick that matches with her tight, pale blue off-shoulder dress. Her long, dark brown hair is straightened with the ends almost reaching her waist. In one word, she looks absolutely beautiful and beyond stunning.
“Nothing is wrong,” she says. Even her voice sounds alluring.
“Why did you laugh then?”
She grins. “I saw the look on your face and couldn’t help but laugh.”
I frown in confusion. “What look?”
She shrugs, sipping her glass as she tries to hide her smile.
“What is so funny?” Even to me, my voice sounds irritated.
“Usually, the people I meet are very hard to read. But you are like an open book. Your eyes betray what you think, sweet,” she mutters, leaning closer as her floral scent envelopes my nostrils. “I can easily tell you are thinking about having a life similar to your brother’s. Perhaps a tad different than his, but sorry to burst your little bubble – that married life doesn’t exist.” She winks and straightens up, finishing the rest of her drink before she turns and walks away.
For several seconds I just stood there, processing her words, unable to reply. I know what she said isn’t a lie, but the way her words shattered the slightest hope I have been holding onto in the blink of an eye makes my heart pound faster. Sudden anger erupts within me. Shaking my head, I try to clear my mind before following her outside to the backyard.
“Hey! Wait!” I call out for her.
We are by the side of the building before she looks over her shoulder with a frown. I stride towards her, feeling my rage rising.
“Who do you think you are? How dare you tell me something like that?” My voice is filled with an accusing tone.
She arches an eyebrow and crosses her arms against her chest. The amusing look spread across her face. “I didn’t know the Addison family is so easy to offend.”
I scoff. “Anybody would be offended because you have no right to just be all up in my business.”
She saunters towards me until she is standing so close I can feel the heat of her body. I feel my skin prickling with goosebumps and my blood rushing faster and faster. Hesitant all of a sudden, I start to take a few steps back until my back is pressed against the brick wall. her eyebrow arching with an inquisitive look. There is something about the way she looks at me, that strange expression that seems to be holding a dark and forbidden emotion, makes me swallow the lump in my throat. The air between us changes. I feel a sudden pull towards her, electricity passing between us when she leans her face closer and her warm breath is grazing against my cheek.
“Deep down you know I’m telling the truth, sweet. That dreamy look in your eyes was more than enough to tell me that you still think one day you will have a happily ever after. Guess what? You gave up that right the day you were born into this world of crime and violence,” she whispers. My breath hitches when her nose trails along the side of my face. She rests her hands on both sides of my head, caging me, while my eyes flutter close from her feather-like touch against my cheek.
She smiles mirthlessly. “But I’m seeing something else, too. Something undiscovered, even by you.” I feel her breasts press against mine as my breathing turns shallow and heavy. My chest heaves up and down.
What is happening to me?
What is this sudden feeling towards her that I’ve never felt before?
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach just from her mere presence, prickling in the back of my neck.
“You are well aware that if anyone sees us now in this situation, it will create a bad image for you. Might taint your family’s reputation.” Her one hand snakes around my waist with the other cupping my jaw. I open my eyes and see her lust-filled gaze meeting mine. “And from that innocent and beautiful face, it’s clear you have never done this before. Hell, you might not have been kissed for all I know. Am I right or,” she steps closer, “Am I right?” she asks.
“I…” my voice trails off as I become speechless. My throat feels dry with my heart beating so fast that I can hear it drumming in my ears.
She is right. If anyone sees us now, it will cause a scandal, or perhaps even worse than that. I keep telling myself to stop this, to tell her no and walk away, pretending this never happened between us. But this sudden feeling keeps urging me to want something I shouldn’t be having… a forbidden desire.
“Let’s change that, shall we?” Leaning forward, her lips touch mine in a deep and slow kiss. Her grasp on my jaw slightly tightens while her hand on my waist pulls me closer to her with my hands resting on her arms on instinct. I moan into her mouth, feeling her tongue mingling with mine. I’ve often thought about my first kiss with a man, whose touch and kiss will be coloured with sweetness and gentleness, making me swoon in his arms. But never have I even dreamt of having my first kiss this way. So different from my imagination and yet so much better.
And with a girl.
Her kiss holds passion and desire that makes my spine tingle with adrenaline rushing through me. Her lips taste like champagne and strawberries while her tongue explores my mouth, tasting my cherry flavoured lip balm. Her moans are muffled by my lips as I feel myself getting lost in her touch and sensation. An aching starts to grow within me as I feel it between my legs. She nibbles on my bottom lip making it almost painful before kissing and sucking on it, soothing and heightening the ache.
“So fucking good. So sweet,” she murmurs each word between the kisses.
Heavy footsteps rustle on the grass and catch our attention. She pulls her face away from me in a blink of an eye. Both of us start to breathe heavily, our lungs craving for air. But when I hear Macsen and Theo’s voices, instant fear grips me.
Dear God.
I try to get out of the woman’s hold as she is grinning down at me, enjoying seeing me struggle. She’s only a little bit taller than me but she sure as hell is stronger.
“Move away,” I whisper harshly, almost in a threatening tone. “If my brothers see you like this, then they will–”
“They will what? Torture me? Kill me?” she suggests.
How can she be so calm about it? As if she doesn’t give a single damn about anything.
“Just let me go and stay away from me,” I whisper harshly as I keep looking to my side, watching my brothers talk. With a swift hard kiss on my lips, she moves back but is still close to my body, smiling at me with a devilish look on her face.
“That kiss told a different story and you know it. But one thing I’m certain of, you’ve opened a gateway for yourself that you weren’t prepared for. You are telling me to stay away from you, but soon you will be the one coming after me. And when this moment happens again, I won’t stop, sweet,” she whispers, licking her lips and taking a few steps back.
I’m just standing there unable to move or say a word.
“See you soon,” she mutters before turning away and walking towards the front of the building. I lean against the wall, letting out a sigh of relief. But my body is still shivering from the aftermath of that kiss. It is a feeling… a sensation I’ve never felt before. I shake my head, trying my best to calm down. When I notice Theo and Macsen aren’t there anymore, I fix my hair and smooth out my dress before joining the ceremony.
I try to distract myself, not letting myself think of that kiss and her. But it seems nearly impossible. My mind keeps trying to push her away from my thoughts but my eyes keep searching for her at the party, even though by the end of it, I’m a wee bit disappointed by her disappearance.
Don’t think about her, Lara.
Don’t think about her.
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