Egotistically Yours by Hayley Faiman

Chapter Five

LAURENT

Tucker Clark is perfect.

I haven’t been around many babies, but I’ve seen pictures and I know that this child is perfection. I hold him while Bethie eats her lunch, but I never want to let him go. He’s mine. I feel it down to my bones. She doesn’t want to admit it yet, but we both know that this is my son.

He falls asleep in my arms, his belly full of milk. I can’t look away and suddenly, anger fills me. Bethie would have kept this from me, she tried to. She wasn’t going to tell me about him, she was just going to go on living her life and keep my son from me.

She stands and scoops him out of my arms, laying him down to finish his nap. When she comes back into the room, I’m on my feet and pacing with anger.

All of the advice my dad gave me goes out the window, as my anger bubbles, along with everything I’ve been trying to build with her for the past few days.

When she returns, I’m hot and fucking bothered.

“Laurent, is everything okay?” Bethie asks from a few feet away. I’m standing at the window looking out at the city.

Spinning around, I decide to let it go. Fuck this pussyfooting around shit. My dad wants me to be a giant fucking vagina and I can’t do it. This is bullshit. Complete and total bullshit.

“No, it’s not,” I grind out

She blinks, oblivious to why I’m angry with her. Clearing my throat, I stare at her for a moment. She’s beautiful, even with the extra baby weight, it doesn’t take away from her beauty. She could keep it and I’d be good with that.

“Pack your shit, pack his shit, you’re coming home with me today.”

“Excuse me?” she hisses.

Shaking my head, my gaze connects with hers. “I’m not fucking around. Pack your goddamn shit. My son doesn’t spend another night without me. That means you come with him.”

She opens her mouth, but I don’t allow her to speak. Closing the distance between us, I march toward her. She backs away until her body hits the wall. I don’t stop, though, not until my chest is touching hers. Looking down, I search her eyes angrily.

“Pack your fucking shit. You thought you could keep him from me. I don’t know why you decided it would be a good choice to do that. I thought I could take my time, win you over, but fuck that. I want my son and I want him under my roof.”

“That’s not your choice to make, Laurent,” she states.

I snort. “Yeah, it is.”

“No, it’s not,” she snaps. “No judge on earth is going to allow you to take him from me. So just stop acting like an asshole, and back up.”

Shaking my head once, I let out a growl, but I don’t back up. Instead, I focus on her, my gaze never leaving hers. She inhales short breaths, panting, no doubt the same rage that fills me does her as well. But for different reasons.

“I don’t give a fuck what a judge will or won’t say. You’ll pack your goddamn shit, Bethanie.”

“Or what?”

“Don’t make me come up with an, or what, you won’t like it.”

She lets out a grunt, lifting her hands between us and tries to push me away. It doesn’t work. My anger is flowing too hard, there is nothing she could say right now that would calm me down, nothing other than agreeing to my demands.

“You’re an asshole,” she grinds out.

“Yeah, but you’re a bitch for trying to keep my son from me.”

Pushing away from her, I lift my hand and run my fingers through my hair. I tug on the ends before I wrap my hand around the back of my neck to massage it in an attempt to relieve tension.

It doesn’t work. My entire body is one ball of tension at this point. There is no walking away without my family, not anymore. I did that last night and that was the final time I ever do that shit again.

“You can’t make me go. I know you think I’m being a bitch, but that’s not what I was doing. You’re selfish, Laurent. I can’t allow my baby to be raised by a man-child.”

Spinning around, I face her and shake my head a few times, my gaze finding hers. “You don’t get to decide that, Bethanie. You don’t get to create life with me, then hide it from me. That’s not how this works. Am I selfish? Yes. Did I fuck up with you? Also, yes. But I am not a bad person. I am not going to hurt him, not fucking ever. You don’t get to take the chance to know my own child away from me.”

I watch her reaction and I see it when my words finally hit her. She flinches, then her shoulders slump down. She knows she fucked up and I know without a doubt what I’m demanding is equally as fucked up, but I’m done playing.

Slowly, she lifts her head, her eyes finding mine and I see the defeat in her gaze. “What do you want, Laurent?”

“My family,” I state.

“I don’t know what that means,” she breathes.

Shaking my head once, I clear my throat. “It means you’re mine. Both of you.”

She opens her mouth, no doubt to ask for clarification, but she’s not going to get that right now. Instead, I narrow my gaze on hers.

“It means you pack your shit and you’re living with me until it doesn’t work for us anymore.”

“Well, what if it doesn’t work for me right now?” she asks harshly.

I arch a brow, my lips curving up into a grin. “Baby, it works for you now, it’ll always work for you. I see the way you look at me, I hear the way your breath hitches when I’m near, and I saw the tears in your eyes when I held my son. So, do us both a favor and—” I lean down close to her. “Pack your shit.”

“You’re a cocky bastard,” she hisses.

“Yeah, and you want more of me. So pack this goddamn shit so that I can have my son beneath my roof.”

“You can’t fit half his things in your car. What are your plans?” she asks, crossing her arms across her chest.

“I’ll call Lawrence, he has a pickup. Pack,” I shout, my patience and control fucking dissipated at this point.

If I ever thought of myself as a controlled businessman, I would call myself a fucking liar in this moment, because I have zero control left inside of me. Bethie presses her lips together, rolling them a few times.

She’s still plastered with her back against the wall, probably too afraid to move. I don’t blame her. I’m still pissed the fuck off. I’ve missed every milestone of her pregnancy and seeing my son come into this world.

After my father had his fourth child last night, seeing how excited he was to send me pictures of him and the baby right after she was born, I realize that I missed a lot. I missed a lot because Bethie kept it from me. I can’t get those moments back, there is nothing I can do. But I’m not going to miss any more, that’s for goddamn sure.

BETHANIE

I can’t stopmyself from trembling as I do exactly what Laurent demanded I do—pack my shit. Tucker sleeps through all of it, and Laurent stays in the living room while I pack mine and Tucker’s clothes.

I can hear his muffled voice from the other room and I don’t try to make out his words, not wanting to know what he’s saying, knowing without a doubt it’s about how terrible I am.

I don’t blame him though, I can’t. I did keep Tucker from him and I don’t know when I was even going to tell him about his own child. What kind of person does that? It’s not like I don’t know who Tucker’s father is. I’ve only been with Laurent over the past two years, there’s been nobody else.

My phone buzzes on my nightstand and I jump before I rush over to answer it. It’s my mom, and I quickly slide my thumb across the screen. I need to talk to her. I haven’t told her much about Tucker’s father, not even his name, and I know she is dying to know more, but she doesn’t want to push me.

“Mom,” I whisper.

“Okay, I’m making a list of things to bring this weekend, is there anything special you need?” she says, completely oblivious to the panic in my voice.

“Mom,” I snap.

“What?”

She’s quiet and I look at the bedroom door, watching it and waiting for it to burst open, but it doesn’t.

“Laurent came by, he knows about Tucker.”

“You’re going to need to explain to me exactly what you’re saying.”

I sigh heavily, then I go about telling my mom everything—well at least everything that she needs to know. Some things just aren’t for her ears. By the time I’m finished, I bite my bottom lip and silently wait for her response.

“I think he’s right,” she whispers. “I don’t know that I necessarily agree with the way he’s gone about it, but I don’t agree with what you’ve done either, Bethanie. You’re an adult, and I don’t want to lecture you, but this man is the father of that baby and he deserves to know his son. He deserved to know from the beginning.”

“I know,” I breathe. “I know.”

She doesn’t say anything for a long moment, then she clears her throat. “I won’t come this weekend. I’ll come next weekend and meet him. I want this to work for you. You love him, correct?”

“Mom,” I whisper.

“I know my daughter,” she says with a soft laugh. “You don’t even have to answer me.”

“He’s an egotistical asshole,” I say.

My mom hums, then she speaks. “Well, it seems that you have a lot to work out with him, darling girl. I am just a phone call away, but I truly think that you should try, for Tucker.”

“I don’t want a back-and-forth, it isn’t good for him.”

“I agree, but he’s also two weeks old. I think you can afford to spend some time figuring out your relationship right now without causing too much trauma.”

I can tell that she’s smiling as she speaks and it makes me want to roll my eyes. I grumble and a few minutes later I end the call before I go back to packing. Just as I’m putting the last of my clothes in my suitcase, Tucker starts to wiggle in his bassinet.

He makes a few little noises and I walk over to him, smiling down at his little wiggly body. He’s fascinating. Every single part of him causes me to stare in awe. He stretches and opens his eyes, watching me for a moment before he starts to whimper, then cry.

Leaning down, I change him before I pick him up, cooing down at him as I sit down on the edge of the bed and start to feed him. I haven’t packed any of his things yet and I’m sure it’s going to piss Laurent off, but I don’t really care too much about that.

A few moments later, my bedroom door opens and Laurent waltzes in. He looks around, then his gaze connects to mine. “Are you ready?” he asks.

I look down at Tucker attached to my breast, then lift my eyes back up to meet his. “I’m not. I’m a little busy. I haven’t packed any of Tucker’s things, only my own.”

He grunts then reaches for the handle of my bag. “This everything you’re bringing?” he asks, tugging the bag forward a bit.

“Yeah, it wasn’t hard. Most of my clothes don’t fit,” I admit on a mumble.

He smirks. “You can go shopping when you get settled.”

“No, I can’t,” I say.

He arches a brow, watching me in silence for a moment, waiting for me to clarify. I inhale a deep breath then let it out on a sigh.

“I won’t go back to work for another four weeks. I don’t have money to waste on clothes for myself. I have a baby and although your dad’s company has awesome childcare, I still have quite a bit of expenses.”

He hums but doesn’t say anything. Instead, he nods his head once, then takes a step backward. “Let me know when you’re ready for me to help with anything else.”

“Okay,” I breathe.

I can’t stop thinking about my mom and what she said. She thinks that this is the right move. I need to just accept that this is what needs to happen, at least for now.

I don’t know what tomorrow is going to bring. I’m not moving completely out of my apartment. I’ll still have a home to come back to when this doesn’t work out, because I don’t think it will.

Laurent will get bored of me, he’ll find someone else, just like he did the last time. I just hope that I don’t lose my heart again, I can’t handle the pain that comes with losing Laurent Astor again.