More Than This by Dominique Wolf

CHAPTER 2:

Isabella

I

was a few blocks from my apartment when the rain started to come down. I quickened my pace and pushed myself through the building. The whole ride back I tried to wrap my head around everything, but I couldn't. It was too difficult for me to think about. The pain in my chest deepened with each thought and the tears were finding it difficult to stay put. I unlocked my front door to silence and shut it behind me. I couldn't make it one step further before the tears I was holding back consumed me. I leaned against the door and fell to the floor.

I cried.

I cried like I had never cried before. The pain consumed me - every thought of Giovanni made it worse. I love him. Oh, how I Ioved him. I always knew that the heartbreak I'd feel from Giovanni would be a pain I had never felt before and I was right. I never expected that this would be the way I would be welcomed back home. What was I supposed to do? How was I supposed to react in a situation like this?

I pulled my knees towards my chest, attempting to drown out the aching feeling. I didn't know how much time had passed before I finally managed to stop the tears from falling, a numb feeling settling over me instead. I leaned my head against the door, closing my eyes as I tried to find a moment of peace.

Suddenly, I heard the banging from outside my door and jerked my eyes open.

“Isabella, open the door,” Giovanni shouted from outside.

I froze, unable to move. What was he doing here? I didn't want to see him. I couldn't see him. I wouldn't be able to keep it together.

“Izzy, baby, I know you're in there,” his tone softened. “Please open up for me.”

I unwrapped my arms from my legs and slowly brought myself up. I stared at the door handle. One swift movement and I would open the door to him. I would see him standing in front of me and I would be forced to have my heart broken all over again. I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

He knocked on the door. “Isabella, please.”

I heard the desperation in his voice. I had never heard it before, but it was there along with an underlying subtle hint of sadness. It hurt me to hear him like that but I couldn't move. I couldn't open the door and allow him to come inside. I couldn't do that to myself. I needed time. I had to process all of this and figure out what the hell I was going to do. It was silent for a few minutes, but then I heard his voice through the door again.

“I know how this must look, but we need to talk about this,” he begged. “I need to explain things. I need to figure this out but I need you, Isabella, please.”

I shut my eyes in an attempt to stop the newly formed tears from falling, but I was unsuccessful. They started streaming down my face once more.

“I love you so much, Isabella,” he murmured. “You don't realize how much I love you. Please open the door so we can talk. I can't lose you.”

A part of me was screaming to let him in. One look at him and everything would be okay, she whispered in my mind.

But that wouldn't change the facts.

I covered my mouth with my hand in an attempt to control the muffled cries I couldn't contain. The tears kept flowing.

“Please don't run away from this. I know you must have a million questions, but I just need to see you, baby, please just open the door.”

I did have a million questions and a million emotional reactions running through my head. I was the worst in situations like this. I couldn't help but run and cower away from it. It was my terrible attempt at dealing with pain and this was a different kind of heartbreak that I hadn't experienced before. I didn't move. He continued at my door but I couldn't bring myself to open it and face him.

Not now.

Instead, I reached up to the door and twisted the key, making sure it was locked. I was not going to let Giovanni in. My heart couldn't handle any more of this right now. I dragged myself to the couch and dropped down, burying my head against the pillow as I cried into it.

“I know you, Isabella, you run away when things get difficult, but I'm begging you not to do that now. Not before we've had a chance to speak. I need you, mi hermosa, please,” he choked.

My heart contracted at the sound of his pain. Hearing his sadness only made me cry harder. I didn't know how long he continued at my door before he finally accepted defeat.

“I'll give you your space for now,” he shouted. “But I won't stop, Isabella. We are going to figure this out together. I love you, please.”

With each word from him, I cried harder into the pillow. The heartbreak consumes me more and more. I cried to the sounds of the footsteps of the man I love walking away.