More Than This by Dominique Wolf

CHAPTER 51:

Isabella

“S

o, my family are arriving tomorrow for Christmas Eve,” Reyna explained.

She arrived shortly after Lorenzo left. I told him that I needed time to think about everything - alone. I needed to gather all my thoughts and double down on what I was going to do next. I had to make a decision. Reyna didn't ask me anything about my weekend away which I found unusual. Instead, she came home with a box of some of my favourite pastries and turned on her distraction mode. At first, we ate and drank coffee while she filled me in on what it was like to meet Diego's parents for the first time. Now, we have started a mini spring-cleaning of the apartment. Anything to keep me from having a spare moment to think of anything.

“You know I didn't even realise it was the 23rd,” I admitted.

“I’m not surprised. You've had way too much going on in your life over these last few weeks.”

I reached for the broom and started to sweep the tiles in the kitchen. “I usually love Christmas but this year it's just not the same.”

“Tomorrow you're coming with me so I promise it's going to feel more like Christmas than it does right now.”

The Cazarez family had agreed to join Sergio's family for Christmas Eve now that he and Katrina were engaged. They had a large family home about thirty minutes outside of the city and since I was a roommate and newly appointed third daughter of the Cazarez family, I was encouraged to tag along. The last thing I felt like doing was being around crowds of people to celebrate anything but I was not going to spend Christmas alone.

I was not going to be that girl.

“What are we in charge of bringing?” I asked as I swept the last of the dust into a corner to throw away.

“Dessert,” she announced happily. “Which is great because I technically don't have to make it myself which is why I went out today and stocked up on anything we could need.”

She opened the fridge and displayed an array of boxes.

“Holy shit, Reyna, how many people are attending tomorrow?” I gawked.

She chuckled. “Tons. Apparently, Sergio's family is huge and they invited everyone -los primos, los tíos y las tías, los abuelos - the whole lot of them are excited to meet Katrina.”

The idea of having to socialize with a large group of people was causing a rush of anxiety over me. I was never good at meeting new people. I always found it overwhelming and now it was even worse. I didn't have a handle on my emotions at all, but I was going to have to lock that away in a tight box in my mind tomorrow.

“Katrina must be so excited to meet his family.” I bent down and swept up the dust into the dustpan.

“She’s pretty nervous actually. This is the first time meeting most of them and now that they're engaged, she's feeling some pressure.”

“She'll be fine.”

I emptied the dirt into the bin and placed the dustpan and brush in the corner again. I dusted off my hands and turned to lean on the counter. Reyna had hung up the last of the jackets that were lying around and strolled over to sit on the stool across from me. We sat in silence, but I could tell she had something to say. I knew her well enough and she had been quiet about my weekend away for long enough.

Just as I was about to open my mouth, thunder boomed through the sky causing us both to jump.

“Joder,”Reyna muttered.

“That's quite the storm outside.” I was facing the windows watching as the rain washed over the city.

Reyna turned towards it for a moment before turning back to me with that look on her face again.

I sighed. “Go ahead.”

“How did you know I was going to say something?”

I scoffed. “How long have I known you, Reyna? Trust me, I know when you want to say something.”

“I just wanted to ask about your weekend away.” She eyed me.

I brought a barstool around to where I was standing and pulled myself up onto it. There was a cloth still on the table so I reached out and fiddled with it, avoiding her gaze.

“What about it?”

“You went away with Giovanni for the weekend and you really have nothing to share with me?”

I sighed and met her questioning gaze. I could always count on Reyna to tell me exactly what she thought, but this time I was afraid to know. I hadn't been making the smartest decisions with him but I didn't need a reminder of it.

“He needed a friend.”

“Friends don’t sleep together.”

She wasn't wrong.

“How do you know I slept with him?”

She eyed me. “You don’t expect me to believe you went away with him for the whole weekend and nothing happened.”

The heat spread across my cheeks confirming that she was right about her suspicions.

“Exactly.”

I ignored that and continued. “I need to decide if I want to be with him or not. But for real this time - we can't have this constant back and forth. It's not healthy for either of us.”

“You're right about that.” She leaned her elbow against the counter and rested her head on her hand. “I told him to leave you alone at Paradiso, but then you kissed Lorenzo and that was it for him.”

“Lorenzo kissed me,” I clarified.

“Either way, that set Giovanni off. I honestly thought he was going to punch him.”

“Me too,” I admitted. “Instead it was like being stuck in a pissing contest between the two of them.”

She laughed and rolled her eyes. “Men.”

I laughed and shrugged as I leaned back against the barstool, running my fingers through my hair. My head was pounding and I didn't know if it was from the lack of sleep or from the unnecessary amount of information running around inside of it.

“What are you thinking of doing, Izzy?” she asked softly. “You spent the weekend with your ex-boyfriend. Are you thinking of getting back together with him?”

I lifted my shoulders and dropped them back down. “I don't know what to do. Giovanni has a hold on me in a way no one has ever had before and I can see a future with him.”

“And what about Casey and the baby?”

“See, that was never supposed to be part of my future with him,” I admitted sadly. “And I don't think anything has changed. I've tried to put off dealing with it because the baby isn't here yet so it doesn't seem real, but I just can't be okay with them having a child together.”

A wave of nausea washed over me at the memory of him mentioning the “kidney bean”. It just reminded me that they were sharing something special that didn't involve me. The two of them had made a baby together and it made me sick to my stomach.

“Why couldn't he have not slept around?” I said, exasperated. “None of this would have happened if he had just controlled himself.”

“That's what Giovanni was like. You are the only person I've ever known him to commit to and I'm sure he never expected that.”

“He didn't,” I mumbled.

To think our relationship started off as nothing more than a one-night stand was mind-blowing to me. All of this was the ripple effect of that one night - a night I never expected to have. It was the night that changed it all for me.

“Well, you don't need to make any decisions now.” She reached out and squeezed my hand. “Give it a couple of days. I'm sure by then you'll have thought about it more and you'll be able to make a more informed decision.”

What was she going on about?

I had all the information I needed and deep down I already knew my answer. I would never be able to get past the two of them having a baby and now Giovanni had a responsibility to his child. He was going to have to put that baby first, always.

I wasn't ready to accept the decision I had already made. I needed a couple more days before my life changed for good.