The Bear’s Nanny by Erin Havoc

14

KIERAN

MY BEAR PACES inside me, his hackles rising in fear. He feels it too. This is the make it or break it moment.

Astrid enters the house, Owen in her arms. The child is calm, though his face is streaked in tears. I leave the two of them for a moment and close the door. I rush out to where I dropped my clothes before I changed. There are so many things I have to tell Astrid, and my hard cock pointed at her would not be a help.

Wyatt changes into his human form, his bones bending and breaking and finding their place again. I slip into my pants as he gets to his two feet and approaches me, his features darkened in worry.

“Kieran...” He starts, moving his hands, and shaking his head.

“I know,” I tell him. “I’m lost too.”

The others take their human shapes again, all but Theo. His bear grunts something, tilting his head to the woods. Wyatt nods once, and Theo sets off. He’ll probably get rid of the invaders’ bodies, at least take them away from our clearing. They had no right to break in and certainly not to step into our sacred clearing. As far as I know, having a sacred clearing is a staple in every bear clan. These fuckers knew what they were doing, and they didn’t give two shits about it.

I look up, trying to see the moon between the trees, but it hasn’t risen yet. I wonder if my sister is proud of me. She was never one to partake in violence, but there’s not much I could have done. Not when I had to defend Owen and Astrid.

Wyatt crosses his arms over his chest and sighs. “It wasn’t supposed to go like this.”

Asher approaches, his feet rustling the ground. “How was it supposed to go, then?” His voice is low, and he shoots a glance at our place. I change my direction so he can’t reach the door. I trust these men with my life, but something changes when it comes to Astrid. Asher frowns at me. “She can’t know, Kieran. She’s human. But she’s been living here for a while. It was going to happen eventually.”

Nick shoves a hand through his hair. “This is not good. She can get us all killed.”

I bare my teeth and roar at them. I shouldn’t, but my bear comes up to defend her faster than I can stop him. Brows raise at me, and Wyatt shakes his head.

“She’s Kieran’s mate,” he says in a hush. “It’s complicated.”

“It’s not,” Nick insists. “And Theo would think so too. Yes, Kieran might feel the pull toward her. But does she feel the same?”

My teeth sink into my lower lip. She feels the chemistry, that much, I’m sure of. Our bodies call for one another, and she wants me. But that’s quite different than what being mates implies.

My clan brothers turn to stare at me. There’s doubt on their faces and pity in Wyatt’s eyes. I have no idea what to do.

“She wasn’t supposed to know,” Wyatt says, his shoulders slumping.

“But she does.” Asher takes a step back. “I say she’ll have to stay. You’ll need to keep her here.”

I frown. Yes, that’s exactly what I would like. But it isn’t so simple, is it? From the beginning, I knew she was just passing by. The moment her car gets fixed, she’ll be off. I’ll just be a memory. There’s a knot in my throat every time I think of this. No matter how much I want her. No matter how much love there is in my heart for her, she might not feel the same vibe. Things happen faster for us shifters. With her being a human, there’s an entirely different world out there for her. The courtship is different.

I can’t force her to stay. It would be wrong. But she can’t exactly go, either. Not while knowing our secret. Not while she can ruin the lives of many so easily. If other humans came to learn about us... We would be hunted down.

Wyatt’s eyes are on me when I look up. He twists his lips. “Kieran. Tell her. Everything.”

My brows shoot up. “You sure?”

He nods slowly as if he’s not quite certain. “Maybe Sabrina’s right. The city let her in for a reason. The Bear God made her your mate for a reason.”

I grind my teeth together. My heart flutters in my chest as I stare at the others. There’s a low chance they’d go against our alpha, but I’m still uncertain about them letting Astrid leave with this knowledge.

Asher walks away and grabs his clothes. He gets into them as he turns to us. “I volunteer to keep Owen. We’ll monitor him as you tell her everything.”

I arch an eyebrow. “That’s the oddest part of the entire thing.”

He chuckles, approaching once more. “The kid’s fine. But don’t let this become a habit.”

I nod once, turning to Wyatt again. “And what if she wants to leave?”

Wyatt chews on his bottom lip, looking into the woods. His eyes are unfocused, as if he’s trying to see more, further. He’s become the alpha for many reasons. Wyatt’s smart and dutiful, and his bear is strong and the largest of us. But it always feels like the Bear God has a way to send him messages sometimes. As if he’s able to see through the veil.

We all wait for his words. I tense my shoulders, the silence making my stomach roil. Finally, Wyatt relaxes and sighs. “We’ll have to discuss this with the Council,” he finally says, and I hate this reply. “I’d like to say we can deal with it, especially if you go with her, but I’m not sure. Besides, I can’t make this choice on my own...” His eyes glitter in the darkness as he pins me in place. “We’ll see. First, you’ll tell her all. Since the city allowed her in, let’s see if she wants to stay. If not, we’ll discuss the odds.”

I nod and turn my back to them. My chest is heavy as I climb the steps.

Astrid sits on the couch, lulling Owen to sleep. He tries to fight it, but his eyelids droop as he turns his gaze to me. The sight of her with my nephew on her arm warms me all the way to my toes. There’s a possessive call, and my imagination runs wild with the images of her and our cubs. But this is not the moment. I shut these thoughts away.

Asher’s presence grows behind me, and I enter the living room to give him space. He approaches Astrid without a word, and I have to grit my teeth so I won’t growl at him. He’s here to help; I tell my bear because he’s not taking this shit.

“Here,” Asher says in his monotone voice, offering his hands to Astrid. “I’ll keep an eye on him.”

Astrid looks between the two of us, doubt on her face. I nod once, and she carefully releases her hold on Owen. Asher’s out of the house in half a heartbeat, the door closing behind him.

I stare at her. At beautiful Astrid, with her short blond hair and huge eyes that are as green as the forest leaves on a bright sunny day. She licks at the corner of her lip and crosses her thick, delicious thighs. Fucking hell, how can one woman be so outrageously hot? It shouldn’t be freaking allowed. Even if she stays, I don’t think I can survive a day-long hard-on often. And she’s not even trying. She’s just... Sitting there.

Focus. I take a deep breath, and my legs lead me to her side. Astrid swallows, but there’s no fear in her scent. Fear and arousal are the easiest things to identify in your mate, no matter if you’ve already settled the bond or not.

I bring a chair from the dining table and sit in front of her. Astrid twines her fingers together and watches me; her eyes glitter with curiosity. The way she looks at me gives me courage. “I guess you have questions,” I tell her.

To my surprise, she bursts into laughter. She laughs and laughs, her shoulders shaking. I watch, mesmerized because I’m a sucker for her. “Yes!” She cries out. “Yes, I definitely do.”

A beautiful smile takes over her face, and for a moment, I almost forget what we’re doing. I remember the taste of her lips and how I’m dying to have her. To fuck her, to mate her. I clear my throat. “There’s so much to say. I don’t even know where to begin.”

She smiles, tucking a strand of hair behind an ear. “So, you're a bear.”

I sway my head from side to side, leaning back into the chair and crossing my arms. “Not exactly. I’m a shifter; I can shift into a bear.”

She tilts the corner of her lip. “Same thing, no?”

I shake my head. “No. A bear is an animal, instincts only. I’m a shifter. The human and the bear are one, and I have instincts, but also rationality and feelings.”

“I see.” She chuckles. “Sorry if it came off insulting.”

“It didn’t.”

“And you’re all bears...” She waves a hand to the door, motioning the rest of the clan. “I never knew something like this existed. Only in stories.”

“The stories are true.” I lean forward, elbows on my knees. “Sightings, legends. There’s truth to them. I don’t know when shifters first came to be, but it’s been a long while.”

“As in thousands of years?”

“Yeah. But we keep to ourselves, or we’re hunted. Humans don’t take lightly to what’s different, even if it’s just something minor.”

She nods. “I’ve heard our species killed off every other human species. It wouldn’t be farfetched to picture us killing shifters.” She shrugs. “I mean, it’s so easy to kill ourselves for silly things.”

I cock my head, studying her face. She’s taking this way better than I expected. “Yeah... Shadow Falls is a haven. We rarely have outsiders.”

Astrid’s green eyes widen. “Are you saying... Everyone in town is a shifter?”

“No.” I shake my head. That would be a nightmare. A clan of a few thousand people? Wyatt would never run out of problems to fix. “I mean, there’s a bunch of shifters, yeah. But that’s not all. We’re a haven for supernaturals, as humans would put it.”

Her jaw hangs. “Supernaturals?”

“Nonhumans.”

“Like vampires?”

Her face lights up with so much curiosity I almost forget her life was at stake with this whole thing. “Yeah. Vampire, singular. We have one.”

Astrid’s eyes almost pop out of her head, and she laughs. “You’re kidding.”

“No. But he loves his isolation. You certainly haven’t met him.”

Astrid looks out into the distance, her smile wide. “Is Sabrina a witch?”

I nod. “Yeah. And an old one at that.”

She snaps her fingers. “From the moment I met her, I thought it was so weird how she could read my mind!”

“She does that.” I roll my eyes, unable to hold a smile back. “It’s irritating, I’d say.”

“What else? You said there are more shifters. Are there more bears?”

“We’re the one bear clan, but there are some loners in the woods. The number of bears is usually bigger. We’re at an all-time low. There are also other animals.” I study her face, trying to judge her. There’s no fear in her eyes and no ulterior motives. She’s genuinely curious. I relax. “Wolves. Foxes. Horses. Even some swans.”

Astrid shakes her head in disbelief. “This is amazing. And I just stumbled into it all. How come no one ever found you out?”

Our knees brush, and I reach out to scrape my fingertips down her cheek. She sobers up a bit, her eyes turning dreamy. I love this look on her face. “There’s a spell.”

“A spell?” She blinks slowly as if she’s forgotten what we were talking about.

“Sabrina’s ancestors put it up, and she keeps it going. A spell prevents humans from finding us altogether.”

Astrid’s brows shoot up her forehead. “But I found it.”

“You’re an exception.” My gaze roams over her face, down her body, and my bear grunts in pleasure. He likes what he sees, and he can’t endure the thought of having her sent off or hurt.

“I am?”

I nod. Surely there are better ways to tell this, more romantic ways. But my bear stretches to the surface, and with all the mess we’ve been through tonight, he doesn’t care for romance. “You’re my mate.”

The words are heavy with meaning as they leave my mouth. But Astrid, unsurprisingly, only frowns.

“What does that mean?”

I cup her face in my hand. “It means... I was made for you. And you were made for me.”

She reaches up, and her fingers curl around my wrist. They’re small, and she can’t close her grip. I watch her face closely as emotions wash over them. Doubt, uncertainty, fear... “Are you sure?”

I nod, taking her hand and putting it over my chest. “My bear senses it. He’s the one who chooses.”

She frowns. “Your bear chooses? Not you?”

A smile tips my lips. “He chooses. He tells me ‘she’s the one,’ but he doesn’t command my feelings. What I feel for you is entirely me.”

She chews on her lips. “I don’t quite understand...”

I nod once and fight to organize my thoughts. She’s accepted the shifter story well. Can’t have her running off because she thinks I’m a creep. “Did you feel the pull to me? An unnamed attraction, something you can’t quite understand? Something stronger than you’ve ever felt?”

Her eyes widen. “Yeah, I felt that. I wanted to see more of you.”

“That’s it. That’s the pull of the bond. It’s natural and hard to explain. But then, we met each other, and I got to know you. How good you are, and smart and funny. And we spent time together, and the bond means little. I fell in love with you because of who you are, not because my bear told me so.”

She gasps, her fingers tightening around my wrist and my shirt. “You’re in love with me?”

“I am. It’s fast for human standards, but...” A chuckle leaves me. “I’m not entirely human.”

Astrid swallows, her eyes on me. Her face changes between doubt and certainty, and I can only wonder at the dilemma inside her. She chews on her lip, pulling a hand back, but her face still rests on my palm.

She sighs, staring at me. “Kieran. Who’s Owen’s mother?”

My brows shoot up at her question. Haven’t I ever told her? I analyze her features, and there’s so much doubt in them. “My sister. She passed away.”

Astrid’s entire face melts into relief. She sighs, her shoulders slumping. “Really?”

I nod, cocking my head. “Yeah. She met her mate and moved in with his clan. Turns out the fuckers had a no-mercy policy on coups.” Rage simmers inside me, but it’s quickly smothered when I look at her. “Her mate was the alpha. They killed him, then instead of exiling my sister, they decided to kill her and Owen.”

She gasps, her hand shooting to her mouth. “What?”

“A cop found their car and Owen inside before they could kill him. Shot the bears twice.” I sigh. “I’m relieved these cops were around. We don’t mess with humans, so the bears left. They still wanted Owen, so they kept coming here, trying to find a fault in our protections.”

“Those bears? Those bears were the ones who killed your sister?”

I nod. The knowledge that Owen’s safe and my sister’s avenged makes my bear almost calm. But I still have my mate to deal with, the case of her safety.

My hands around her cheeks, I scoot closer. “Listen, Astrid. You weren’t supposed to know any of this.” I put urgency in my words, try to show her how serious this is. “No human has ever crossed the spells like you did. And though you’re my mate, you could still put us in danger.”

She frowns. “In danger? How? I’m just a measly human. Surely I couldn’t hurt any of you.”

“Not like this, not alone. But if you told enough people, if they believed in you... Shifter massacres are not unheard of.”

She blinks. “I would never do that. And who would believe me, even if I did?”

“There are some people who would. Hunters. We can’t risk it.”

She swallows. “So... Do you have to kill me because of it? Because I know?”

The mere idea shoots pain through me. I hold her close. “Never. I could never do that.”

“What about the others? Would they have to?”

“I’d fight them to death. For you, I’d do anything.”

“Kieran...” She breathes against my mouth, and that seals it.

I kiss her, and she kisses me back. Astrid sighs into the kiss, and she melts into my arms when I pull her to my lap. Her plump bottom plops down onto my hardness, and I hold her close as our tongues intertwine. My teeth rake her bottom lip, and I want to tell the entire world there’s nothing like kissing your mate. I tell myself we can be together and live together even without the mating bond. Yes, I would never be complete, but it’s the closest thing I’d have to happiness without hurting her.

This woman has such a power over me; she puts me on my knees, praying to her curves. I devour her delicious lips, my fingers finding their way through her tresses. She moans softly, her nails scratching down my back, tugging at my hair. Astrid knows how to undo me. My bear commands me to take her, to mark her, but I push him away. This is not the time. Maybe we’ll never reach the right time.

“I want to stay,” she tells me, breathless, as I nibble on her pulse. Her body is covered in goosebumps, and my fingers twitch to find the knots of her nipples.

“Stay?” My mind’s focused on her, on her pleasure, her sounds.

Astrid pulls back slightly and looks deeply into my eyes. “I want to stay. Shadow Falls called to me from the beginning, and now I know why. But I also came to adore this place.” She holds my face between her hands, the tip of her nose brushing my cheekbone. “Let me stay with you.”

My hands wrap around her waist, her words washing over me, making my heart skip a beat. I hold her close, inhaling her sweet scent. My mate and she wants to stay.