For Crying Out Loud by J. Preston

38Family

They say you are what you eat. Funny, I don’t remember eating ‘sexy’ this morning.

- Aiden

Jenny

I give myself five minutes.

Five minutes for a full on breakdown.

Five minutes is too much.

Five minutes is not enough…

Five minutes is exactly how long it takes us to get to the hospital.

As Hayley parks the car, I shake myself out of the despair I’m feeling, knowing that it’s time to put on my big girl pants and be strong.

Be strong for him.

I run from the car, through the parking lot, narrowly missing being hit by an unassuming, blue Jetta. The driver shouts after me, but I can’t hear him. All I see is the glass door entrance to the hospital as it gets closer and closer until, finally, it automatically opens in front of me. I stop, and tentatively walk through and to the information desk. A middle-aged, tired-looking nurse wearing flowery scrubs and large, red rimmed glasses looks up at me expectantly.

“Aiden. Aiden Vaughn,” I gasp out, trying to catch my breath. She just keeps on looking at me, so I clear my throat and start again. “Can you tell me where Aiden Vaughn is, please? He was...in an ac-cident.” My voice breaks on the last word, and I fight back the tears. In my head, the last bit from the voicemail, the crash, is playing on repeat. The screeching tires, breaking glass, screams of passers by… Then, silence as the message ends.

I need to be strong.

The nurse types something on her computer, then looks up at me.

“He’s in surgery, but only family is allowed in the waiting room.”

“I-I’m—” Tears threaten to break free again when a familiar voice says behind me,

“She’s his sister.”

I nod.

“And you are?”

“I’m their step-sister,” Hayley says. Quick thinking. I’d have never thought of that. I nod again, this time with more conviction. The nurse looks at the both of us, narrowing her eyes, then back at the screen, muttering something to herself, shaking her head.

It seems Hayley’s white lie has worked, because, soon, we are walking through winding corridors until we reach a small waiting room with a few plastic chairs and a dying ficus plant in the corner.

Two figures stand up and rush toward us when we arrive.

“Grasshopper.” Carter pulls me into a hug. The world blurs as fresh tears stream down my cheeks and onto his shirt. I allow myself a minute of being weak, then take a deep breath and step out of Carter’s warm embrace.

I wipe my cheeks with the sleeve of my jumper and look around. “Tell me everything.”

“We don’t know much,” Carter hesitates.

“Then tell me what you know.”

“Jen…” Jason interrupts. I whirl around to face him just as the double doors open.

“Nurse Riley.” Carter beams at her. She shakes her head and arches her brow, looking around at us with disbelief.

“I see Aiden’s family is ever growing,” she mutters to herself.

“I’m his sister,” I burst out.

Jason snorts quietly. “That’s just wrong. So wrong.”

“Step-sister,” Hayley chimes in, putting her hand up like we’re in class and she’s just been called upon.

“Ooooh, we’re doing the introductions?” Carter says in a husky voice. “This is Aiden’s cousin, no one important, really.” He points to Jason before putting his palm on his chest and taking a step toward the very pretty nurse, who looks unimpressed. “And I am Aiden’s better looking brother, but you may have noticed that already.” He winks at her.

Nurse Riley takes a deep breath and turns to leave.

“Ma’am.” I run to her. “Can you tell me how he is? Please?”

“It’s Riley. My mom is a Ma’am,” she says gently. “His sister, huh?” I nod, my eyes pleading. She puts her hand on my shoulder, and I swear it weighs a ton. Please let him be okay. “What’s your name, hon?”

“Carter!” Carter shouts from the corner. “But you can call me sugar plum,” he finishes in a stage-whisper. I shot him a look that could shrivel his nuts if I had the magical powers of Hermione. But I don’t, so I just turn back to the kind nurse.

“Jenny.”

“Well, Jenny, your ‘step-brother’ is in the best possible hands he could be. He is currently in surgery and we are doing the best we can…”

“How long will he be in surgery for?”

“I can’t tell you that, but there’s a lot of damage and internal bleeding.”

“Could you—?”

“Yes,” she reads my mind. “I’ll come back every so often to let you know how it’s going. For now, rest assured that the surgeon is doing everything he can to keep him alive.”

“Thank you,” I whisper and hug her. She strokes my hair and unwraps my arms from around her. She smiles a small smile, then turns to leave. Carter runs after her, hot on her heels.

“Seriously, does he ever stop?” Hayley grimaces.

“Give him a break,” Jason says. “It’s his coping mechanism. When things get tough, or awkward, or scary, or are normal…he flirts.”

Hayley grunts, then flops on one of the plastic chairs. I walk over and sit next to her, glancing at the white clock on the wall, at my shoes, the clock, my nails, the clock again.

The clock is definitely broken.

I get up, pace around the room, sit down again, and flick through a magazine, look up at the clock again…

How the hell has it only been five minutes?

“I’m going to grab a coffee. Anyone want a coffee?” I jump up from my seat, my fists clenched. The need to do something, keep busy, is overpowering.

No one replies, so I just leave in search of the cafeteria. It takes me half an hour to find it, get coffees for everyone, then make my way back to the rest of the group.

As I near the door, balancing the styrofoam cups filled with the magical liquid, the nurse from earlier walks into the corridor. She looks at me and smiles. My heart flutters in hope. She reaches me and opens the door to the waiting room for me. Her eyes are tired and sad, and I nearly drop the coffee cups when I realize she’s coming with the news I was hoping for.

A tear trickles down my cheek as I put the coffees on the table and turn to face her.

“The surgery is finished,” the nurse says, then takes a deep breath. “It was very difficult. A lot of internal bleeding.” I feel Carter and Jason step behind me in a protective manner as the nurse continues, unaware of the fact that each word she utters stabs my soul. I hang my head. “Jenny,” she places a hand on my shoulder and gently squeezes. “We fixed what we could but,” I see a water droplet on the floor. I stare at it intently as another one drops from my eye and joins it, making it a tiny bit bigger. “He’s in a coma,” she finishes.

My head whips up. “He’s alive?” Please say yes, please say yes.

She grimaces. “Yes, but the next few days are touch and go.” All I hear is that Aiden is alive. He’s alive! A rush of emotion overwhelms me. Alive!

“Can I see him?” I plead, barely able to choke out the question as the lump of relief grows in my throat. She’s silent for a while, studying my features, then nods, almost imperceptibly.

“Give me a minute.”

“Thank you,” I whisper.

* * *

Nurse Riley is back within an hour and leads us to another waiting area near where we were.

“Just one of you, okay?” She looks at us as we stand in a perfect row and nod in unison. She opens the wooden door, and I unsteadily step into the room.

It smells clean, sterile.

I look around and take in the large window, the bathroom door to my right. To my left, a TV is mounted on the wall, and there’s a large wardrobe unit next to it. I look at the one place my eyes have been avoiding thus far.

The bed.

The bed and the person in it.

Aiden is lying on his back, under a thin, white sheet. Is he cold? I take a step toward him and take him in. His eyes are closed and his face is bruised with little cuts all over. There are wires attached to his body and a large tube coming out of his mouth, keeping him alive. That’s all I need to see in order to get my wits back.

I rush to him.

His chest and left arm are covered in a cast, as is one of his legs. There are bruises and cuts everywhere, and half of his head is shaved, revealing a big bandage. I shiver, then take a hold of his hand and squeeze it. Hoping, praying for a squeeze back.

Nothing happens, and I close my eyes.

“Aiden,” I whisper, my voice cracking. “I love you.” I open my eyes and drink in his face, wishing for it not to be the last time. “Please come back to me,” I croak out and squeeze his hand again.

I lay my head next to his arm, his hand still in mine, and breathe in his scent. He doesn’t smell like Aiden, he smells like a hospital, like surgery, like medication. Tears threaten to break free yet again, so I take a big breath and sit up. “You have to live,” I say with conviction. “You promised. You promised me we’ll be together,” I say to him. “Until we get old.”

I pull his hand to my cheek, then gently move it to my lips and place a small kiss on his fingertips. “Don’t break your promise.”

The large lump in my throat stops me from speaking. I stroke his face and start praying. I’ve never prayed before in my life, but I don’t find it awkward. Instead, it feels comforting. I have this feeling, this belief that someone is listening.

“I love you,” I whisper again to Aiden. “Come back to me,” I tell him. I’m not giving him the option not to.

The beeping of the heart monitor is steady, and I take a deep breath, knowing that I’ll need to get out soon. I place a kiss on his forehead and whisper. “You promised me forever.”

A simple reminder, but maybe he’ll listen. I hold on to his hand for a while longer, then unwrap my fingers and gently place it by his side. I take a deep breath, then get up and start walking toward the door. I’m not going to look back. Looking back would mean I’ll never see him again. So I’ll be strong.

My gaze fixed on the door, I take wobbly steps. As my hand reaches for the door handle, the sound I’ve been dreading fills the room. One singular, long beep. I pull open the door and shout for the nurse.

Doctors and nurses rush in, and the guys and I are left alone again. Hoping. Anticipating.

Was it my fault?

I fall to the floor and my head drops into my hands. I don’t want to be strong anymore. Can someone else please be strong for me? My heart breaks over and over with every second the doctors don’t come out. Then again, every second they are gone means that they are still trying, doesn’t it? I hope they never come out!

After what feels like a million years, they do. Their faces grim.

I stand up and look into the room through the gap between the door, and I nearly cry out as I hear the steady beep of his heart monitor.

* * *

The rest of the day is a blur. We’re told to go home, but we all refuse and, finally, they let us back in to see Aiden. I stay by his side, holding his hand, worrying that if I let go again, he’ll get worse…again. I sleep by his bed that night.

When I wake up the next morning, Aiden is still alive and still in a coma. I keep talking to him, telling him about anything I can think of. I recite poems, I tell him stories, I read, I teach him all about biochemical techniques and systems used to analyze data. I’m hoping that he’ll get so bored with my aimless babbling that he’ll wake up.

By noon, I really need the toilet and I call Carter in, making him swear to hold Aiden’s hand until I come back. He shakes his head begrudgingly but complies nonetheless while muttering that King Carter should be left out of it. I’d called Aiden’s parents in; they arrived late last night. But they left to check into a hotel. They were not impressed with having their family expanded by four new kids, but they didn’t blow our cover. I think they were just relieved that Aiden was not on his own.

In the bathroom, I wash my face with cold water. My eyes are red and puffy, but I don’t care. All I care about is Aiden.

When I come back out, Jason intercepts me, dragging me to the cafeteria and making me drink a cup of hot coffee and eat a stale sandwich. I break all kinds of records with the speed I ingest the food. I’ve been gone for over half an hour. So, once I finish, instead of walking, I run, not wanting to be gone from him any longer.

I run as fast as my feet allow, dodging doctors and wheelchairs, forgetting all about the fact that I hate running. I run until I don’t.

Until I see Carter outside of Aiden’s door.

I come to a full stop.

What is he doing outside? He promised! He promised not to let go!

Unless…

The sandwich threatens to come back up as I take the last few steps towards Carter.

Then I see his face.

He’s beaming.

And just like that, I start crying again. I cry with relief. I let the happy tears fall down my cheeks as my chest fills with air; light, fluffy air. I can breathe again. I wipe my cheeks and fold myself into Carter.

“He’s out of the coma, grasshopper.” I nod into his neck in understanding. “They’re still inside, unhooking him from the tubes, you know?”

I nod again and step away, a smile breaking my face for the first time in what feels like forever. “He’s alive and awake,” I whisper in amazement.

My Aiden.

He’s alive.

He’s awake.

Nothing could make me happier.

“Listen, there’s something you should know,” Carter says grimly. I look up at him expectantly. “After the coma, he might not remember you.”

My jaw drops just as the door opens, and a young doctor comes out smiling at us. Nurse Riley is right behind him. She stops in front of me.

“It seems to me that you all have lost your British accents,” she says, mirth in her eyes. Busted. We managed to keep her away from Aiden’s parents all through the night, but I guess our cover was blown as soon as Aiden woke up and was able to speak.

Carter pushes me toward the door and whispers, “You go see him. I’ll take care of this.”

I walk into the room.

Aiden is on the bed; his eyes are closed.

“Aiden.” I rush to his side, taking his hand. His eyes flutter open and he looks at me. “It’s me. Jenny,” I say, keeping my voice light. “You might not remember me but…well…you love me and…I love you too,” I rush the words.

Aiden smiles. “How could I ever forget you?” His voice is hoarse, barely audible, and he squeezes my hand, making my heart jump. “I mean, I tried,” he continues. “For six years, I tried to forget you to no avail. I guess you should just count yourself stuck with me.”

I smile at him, squeezing his hand back. “Sorry, Carter said—”

“In my defence, I watched ‘The Vow’ last night. That shit was a true story, so there.” Carter walks into the room, Jason and Hayley behind him. They all gather around Aiden’s bed.

“You scared us, man,” Jason says, smiling. “For a minute, I thought I’d have to find another roommate, and you know what a hassle that can be. There are some proper British weirdos out there.”

“Shut up.” I laugh. “I think what Jason is trying to say is that we’re all happy that you’re okay.” I lean over him and place a gentle kiss on his lips.

“Incest!” Carter shouts.

Aiden looks confused. “Let’s just say that, for the time being, I’m your sister,” I say in a terrible British accent.

“Oh yeah, we’re all one big, happy family,” Carter confirms in his version of British, wrapping his arms around Hayley and Jason. Jason follows, putting his arm around me.

We are.

Happy.

Family.