Taming Lucinda by Normandie Alleman

Chapter 8

Lucinda

"You're an angel," I told my oldest daughter as she passed me a very large glass of wine.

"You're drinking for two," Dynassy teased, her hand settling over her stomach. We'd done everything we could, but there was no stopping the internet. My affair with the gardener was already trending on Twitter. "I'm sorry, Mom. I know you didn't plan for it to happen this way, but it did seem like you were getting ready to be more public about Cole."

I frowned, but before I could ask her how she knew, she patted my arm.

"Esther would never say anything, but her poker face is terrible. I know things didn't go so great the last time, but what did you tell me when I fell down on that runway in Milan?"

I sighed. "Get out there again."

"Exactly. One disaster does not preclude you from future success, Mother. Cole seems like a nice guy."

"He is."

"Right. So maybe it's not the end of the world that your relationship is public," she offered. "I know you like to manage how this kind of information gets out, but..." She shrugged. "Don't let it ruin a good thing."

I took a long drink from the wine glass, letting the warmth of alcohol spread through me while Dynassy's words sunk in.

"When did you get so smart?"

She scoffed, "I've always been smart. I was just ... sheltered. Being with Bridger has really opened up my world in so many ways."

"I wasn't sure about him at first, but he is really good for you."

She nodded. "He is. Which brings up something I've been wanting to talk to you about..."

My mom senses were going off. The ones that told me my child was about to try to sweettalk me into something.

"What do you need?"

Dynassy bit her bottom lip, looking down at her stomach.

"With the kids on the way, Bridger and I thought it would probably be best if we got married before they arrive. We don't want any big production, and I've had enough fancy parties to get me through a lifetime, but I could use your help planning a small family thing."

"You want me to help plan your wedding?" It was every mother's dream. With my terrible track record, I was a little surprised one of my children liked me enough to involve me, but I wasn't going to question it. I didn't want to give Dynassy a chance to rethink the offer.

"Yeah ... if you want to. It's probably terrible timing now..."

"Of course not! It's never a bad time to plan a wedding. It might be just what I need to cheer me up. Have you thought about a venue?"

She shook her head. "Like I said, we want to keep it small. Just close family, really."

"Well then, why don't you have it here?"

Dynassy considered it for a moment, then nodded. "That should be fine. Bridger won't be home for a few more weeks—do you think we could have everything done by the time he gets back?"

"Honey, we're Barneses. We can do anything we put our minds to."

Dynassy smiled, then after a moment, she leaned in for a quick, firm hug. "He really makes you happy, doesn't he?"

Before I could deflect that question, the man of the hour tried to sneak into the kitchen from the back. Unfortunately for him, that was where Dynassy and I were having our little chat.

He froze, then looked back to the door.

"I can—"

"No," I said. "Stay. Dynassy, could you give us a moment?"

She was already on her way out before I even asked.

"I'm sorry about earlier," I said. "My security team should have been able to stop that. If you get any trouble from the press or anything, just let me—"

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"What?"

"You seemed really upset, and I know you were dreading this hitting the press."

I shook my head, looking up into his warm, accepting gaze, completely awed.

"You are way too good to be real," I muttered. It wasn't the first time I'd said those words to the man I was sleeping with, but it was the first time in a very long time.

"I'm glad you think so," he said, cautiously putting his hands on my hips. "How bad is it?"

I laughed, rolling my eyes. "About as bad as you'd expect. You probably shouldn't read anything they say."

"Am I a gold digger, or are you robbing the cradle?"

That got a real, genuine laugh out of me. "A little of both."

"Screw them," he said, pulling me closer. "We don't need their approval. They'll get bored and move on to another story soon enough."

"Funny you should mention that. Dynassy wants to get married here in a couple of weeks."

He chuckled. "That should do it."

After a moment of just standing there together, Cole took a step back. "Are we okay?"

I swallowed past the lump in my throat and nodded. "Yeah. We are."

"Good." He kissed me. "I'm having too much fun with you for something to get in the way of it now."

"Me too," I answered, but my voice was a little hollow. Fun.

That was what this was.

I needed to remember that.

He was glistening from all his hard work in the sun. "Oh no. You probably came in here for a drink, didn't you? And I'm holding you hostage..."

He grinned, his expression turning hungry when he said, "I don't mind."

"Well, go get a drink. I don't want to be responsible for your heat stroke."

"Dynassy?" I called, looking out into the other rooms of the open-plan living space. She was sitting by one of the windows, scrolling through wedding inspiration on her phone. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed that she’d wanted to keep the whole thing small and quiet. I would have loved to plan a big, extravagant affair to rival the royal wedding Leo and Honoré had. I knew better than to push, though. I was lucky to be included at all. If I try to control Dynassy's big day, she might decide to cut me out altogether.

"Everything's okay," I answered the question in her expression, waving for her to follow me. "I want to introduce you properly."

"Oooh," she teased, still grinning when I gave her a withering look.

Cole was luckily still by the sink drinking a glass of water.

"Cole, this is my daughter Dynassy. Dynassy, this is the man I've been seeing."

He looked a little confused, but she was grinning ear to ear.

"A pleasure to meet you," she said.

"You too," he answered. "I hear you're getting married soon. Congratulations."

"Thank you! There's a lot to plan, even for a little backyard wedding."

"If you don't already have something, I could build an altar for your 'I do's," Cole offered, glancing my way.

"Really? That would be amazing!"

"Sure," he answered, a little sheepish all of a sudden. "I can draw up a couple of ideas in the next couple days, and you can tell me which one you like."

"Sounds great."

"All right... Well, I better get back to the garden."

"Stay hydrated," I called after him.

Dynassy was still grinning long after he'd left.

"Mom, he is a catch!"

My face warmed with a blush. "I'm glad you like him," I said, leaving it there. Fun, I reminded myself. I didn't know if it would ever be anything more than that. Was there long-term potential with Cole?

Did I want there to be?

With everything else going on in my life, fun was about as much as I could handle.

"Have you talked to any of your siblings about the wedding?" I asked, almost afraid to know the answer.

Dynassy frowned. "I tried calling Leo, but he didn't answer. Nick was at practice, but he's going to call me back. I haven't talked to Ivy yet."

"I'm sure your sister will be thrilled for you. She's always been a fan of Bridger."

That seemed to be the encouragement Dynassy needed to dial her sister. The video call connected after a delay, and then Ivy's stuttering picture came through.

"Hold on—" Ivy said, the video a complete blur. Gradually, it became more of a video than a slideshow, then Ivy was back in the frame. "There's no reception out here, so if I'm not on the Wi-Fi... Anyway, what's up?" Her hair was a mixture of purple and pink, a few bold streaks of black running through it. Maybe one day she would settle on a color.

"What are you doing in ... oh, about three weeks?" Dynassy asked, smiling at her sister. I was just out of the camera's view—this was Dynassy's moment, not mine.

"Um...Why do I have a feeling you're about to tell me?"

"Cause you're smarter than people give you credit for," Dynassy laughed. "Bridger and I are getting married."

"Ohmygosh!" Ivy squealed in as a single word. "Dy, that's so great!"

Dynassy was practically bursting. She had her fairy tale life, so why shouldn't she be overjoyed?

"So you're coming, right? It wouldn't be my dream wedding without my little sister."

"Of course, yeah. I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"If you're coming to L.A. anytime soon, you could come dress shopping with us too..." Dynassy added, trying to sound casual. How long had she planned that one? She certainly was my daughter.

"Are you still at Mom's?" Ivy asked.

Dynassy nodded, tilting her phone to show me standing a few feet away.

"We're having the wedding here," I said brightly.

"Oh," Ivy said, some of her enthusiasm fizzling away. I kept my smile plastered in place, but it broke my heart how cold she instantly was when she saw me. My cheeks twitched with the effort of holding the fake smile in place. "Okay... Let me know when you're going shopping, and I'll see what I can do with my schedule," she told her sister. "I'm really happy for you, Dy. Bridger's such a great guy, and you're going to be awesome parents."

"Thanks... Hey, have you heard from Leo at all? I tried calling to invite him, but he wouldn't answer."

Ivy's expression darkened, and even though I wasn't in frame anymore, she glared in my direction.

"No. I haven't really talked to him since..." She cleared her throat. None of my children were happy to learn about the affair I'd had with Ray, but Ivy was more upset about what the news had done to her relationship with her twin. They used to be so close. I hated that Leo was taking this out on her too.

"You might have better luck getting to him through Eden," Ivy said bitterly. "They're super close now, apparently."

I had to leave the room while the girls finished their call. I couldn't keep the act up anymore.

How could something that ended more than twenty years ago still be screwing up my life so much?

How on Earth could I fix it?

I didn't like the idea that Leo might never forgive me, but I could accept it. What I couldn't accept was him turning his back on the rest of his family for no good reason. They didn't deserve to be guilty by association.

It was looking more and more like the only way forward was telling them the truth.

The whole truth.

But what if that still wasn't enough? Leo was stubborn, and it was entirely possible that nothing I said could make any difference.

If that was the case, why would I want to risk making things worse with my other children?

Russ and Cole both thought I should come clean, but they weren't women. They didn't understand the way my children would look at me, what the whole world would think of me. If I were a man, it would hardly be noteworthy.

No matter how many glass ceilings I’d shattered, there were always more.

Between all the physical activity last night and the excitement with the paparazzi this afternoon, I was exhausted. The large glass of wine Dynassy had poured me was making my eyelids heavy, all my bones feeling a little less solid. I went upstairs and did something I hadn't done since my kids were in diapers: I napped.

There was no escape from my worries, though. I dreamed of camera flashes and ugly headlines, my kids turning their backs on me, saying terrible things to me. When I woke up, I was on the verge of tears, and I couldn't even remember the details, just the emotions.

It was a knock on my door that had woken me, and Dynassy poked her head in when I didn't respond.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

I sat up groggily, rubbing my eyes as a yawn escaped.

"Nick finally called me back, and I thought you might want to talk to him?" She came forward, holding her phone out.

My heart caught in my throat. Nick used to be the one who best tolerated me—at least when we weren't fighting over his career or my interference in his personal life—but that was a long time ago.

"How are you?" Nick said as I took the phone. "I saw some headlines... Who's this gardener guy?"

I shot a look up at Dynassy, but she held up her hands. She wasn't expecting the ambush either.

"No concern of yours," I answered. "You've got a pretty good shot at the playoffs this year from what I hear. Have you thought about renegotiating your contract?"

"Mom—"

"You've increased attendance by at least fifteen percent, not to mention the merchandise sales—"

"Lucinda," he said, firmer. "I have an agent, and he is incredibly competent; I assure you."

I sighed, nodding. "Of course. I'm sorry, I can't just turn off being your mother. I want to know they appreciate your worth."

"They do. Listen, I have to go. Eden and I have plans to take the kids out tonight. I'll see you at the wedding, okay?"

"Okay. I love you."

"Love you too," he muttered. "See you soon, sis!" he shouted to Dynassy before hanging up.

At least Nick didn't hate me, but his wife definitely wasn't a fan of mine. Especially after she’d found out I'd had an affair with her father. It did make our family tree a little complicated. Leo was the twins' uncle from both sides, for one.

Alone with my thoughts again, all I could do was wonder if it had all been worth it. Ziggy and Ray were both long gone; I'd been alone for a long time, and it hadn't been easy. But I'd worked hard and made sure my kids would never want for anything. If that wasn't success, what was?

The road had never been easy, but nothing worth having ever was.

And that, more than anything else, convinced me of what I needed to do.