Sassy Cowgirl Kisses by Kathy Fawcett
Chapter 44
It took Kat an entire day until she was finally ready to talk.
Since arriving at the park, they’d spent hours hiking along the geyser basin, to Yellowstone Falls and the mud pots.
“Pee you!” Willow held her nose against the sulphur smell.
They drove amongst the roaming buffalo, and spotted moose, deer and elk. They even saw a glimpse of a black bear way up on a hill. Kat was quiet as the threesome enjoyed the waterfalls, and swam in a natural swimming hole in Firehole Canyon. Like a zombie, she ate what Gunnar ordered for her, and obediently walked along the trails he chose. And she silently hugged and loved on a slightly shaken Willow at every opportunity.
Finally at night, after the tuckered-out child was fast asleep from hiking the trails near Old Faithful, Gunnar and Kat sat outside their log cabin in two rustic chairs—a chilled bottle of Riesling between them.
“His death was a shock, though he’s been dead to me for half my life or longer. To think he’s been alive and a father to someone else, is hard to fathom. What really hurts is that he stayed for her, and not for me,” she said simply. “My dad didn’t abandon Sassy or her mom… and I’m jealous of that. It makes me feel… lesser than.”
“Lesser than what?” Gunnar asked, softly.
“Lesser than her. Like I wasn’t as good, or as pretty, or as valued by him.”
Gunnar swallowed hard and reached over for her hand. It was cold and lifeless, but he held on tight for the both of them until at last, she grabbed hold and met his eyes. Both had unshed tears leaning in towards each other.
“You scared us, Kat,” Gunnar choked out, “Willow and me. Please promise me you’ll never leave. That you’ll come and find me instead.”
She nodded.
“I’m so ashamed of myself for frightening you both. It was just a blind impulse that I couldn’t control. I know it’s because I let dark thoughts take hold, so it’s on me. I wonder if that’s how my dad felt when he left… maybe we’re more alike than I thought, him and me.”
Gunnar frowned and shook his head at her words.
“Your dad shouldn’t have left you. But he shouldn’t have left Sassy, either. Two wrongs definitely do not make a right.”
Kat regarded his words as she took a sip of her cold wine.
“I know,” she whispered.
“I like Sassy,” Gunnar said carefully, “and I think you would too, if you gave her a chance. She’s not the one who hurt you, Kat. She’s not your dad.”
“But…” Kat agonized over her answer. “…she looks like him.”
Gunnar nodded.
“Again, not her fault. For the record, I think she looks like you. Like a lesser-than version of Kat West, without the trademark Kat West command of the world around her.”
“Give her time,” Kat replied under her breath.
Kat was smiling, and nearly laughing at Gunnar’s observations.
“Nah—she’ll always be the deputy,” he said, “never the Sheriff.”
That did it. Kat let out a laugh that allowed the tears to fall, breaking whatever spell held Kat at such a low point.
“What do you say, Sheriff,” he said, gently taking the glass from her shaking hand. “Should we call it a night?”
“You might have to carry me, I’m so tired,” she said with a sniffle as she brushed her lips against his. Her chestnut hair fell in waves against his bare forearms like an unraveling bolt of silk, sending shockwaves through his body. As she kissed him, Kat slid a warm hand under the collar of his shirt, caressing his neck. Hungry for her touch, Gunnar lifted his shoulder to trap her hand, willing it to stay.
“Oh,” he said as he stood up and lifted her in his arms, “I can do that, Mrs. West.”