Perceive by K E Osborn
KENZI
After talking with Axel today, my head is all over the place. It’s spinning with this new information. I can’t decipher whether it’s real, made up, or some twisted version of both. But there’s something about him that seems genuine. Whether it’s the soothing touch of his hands or the longing gaze in his eyes, I can’t tell.
It’s just the way he is around me that lets me know he cares for me.
A feeling that’s both unfamiliar and familiar at the same time.
Though, I have no idea how.
The walls of my small cell feel like they’re closing in on me. I wish I could see the stars. To go outside and smell the crisp night air, taking in the smell of the trees and the fresh-cut grass. Feel the rain on my skin, but just like with Hendrix, I’m confined, but at least with Rix, I had a house in El Paso or a bunker I was free to roam.
Here, I’m confined to a four-foot cement cell.
My bed is solid, the mattress thin, barely soft. The covers good enough for the weather at this time of year. But the gray walls only make my depression feel worse as I sit at the edge of my bed staring at the ceiling.
Axel has probably gone home for the night.
I wonder what his home is like.
Does he live at the clubhouse?
I know nothing about him other than he seems to believe we have this whole life together.
I can’t even fathom that.
Though, a part of me really wants to.
All I know is, Hendrix is the one who told me about my past. He showed me how to live again. He taught me how to cope with my memory loss.
Without him, I’m nothing. Right?
All these thoughts swarm my head, instantly making it start to throb. I wish I knew, for certain. I wish I had some idea what my life held before Rix.
Kenzi Version 1.0—who was she?
I want to know—good or bad.
Feeling exhausted after the events of today, I lean back on my bed, my head on my pillow and close my eyes. Images of Axel sliding his hand up my calf roll through my mind, and my skin tingles. Why does he affect me like this? If he is so bad for me, then why does my body react to him the way it does. I can’t deny it. He’s sexy as sin. I want to fight my attraction to him, but there’s something about him, and I just can’t place it.
It’s like when you can’t find the right word and it’s on the tip of your tongue, it’s right there, threatening to break through, but no matter how hard you try, it won’t come to you.
Suddenly, a beep sounds at my door. I force my eyes open and ease my legs over the side of the bed so I’m sitting. When the door swings open, it’s hard and harsh, slamming back against the wall, making my body jump. Before my gaze moves to the visitor, I already know it’s not Axel or one of his friends.
While they were strict and stern, they weren’t aggressive.
The energy around this man is different. He’s tall and has an all-American farm-boy look going for him. He’s good-looking, but I can’t stop staring at the ears poking out from under his hat.
“Hey, little lady.” His southern drawl instantly makes me cringe. It immediately puts me on edge, and my fingers grip the bed beneath me, the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end. Axel had at least made me feel like I was safe here. Like they weren’t going to try and hurt me to get what they wanted. But the look on this guy’s face tells me maybe I’m wrong.
He takes a step closer, and instinctively I lean back, not liking the way he closes the distance between us. “Oh, come on now, don’t be like that. I just wanna talk to you.”
I turn up my lip. “I think I’ve done enough talking for today.”
His eyes darken and narrow as he storms over to me. I scramble off the bed and back up against the wall. He comes face to face with me but doesn’t touch me. Instead, pressing his hands to the wall on either side of my head, his eyes simply bore into mine as I pant heavy breaths. “What did you tell them?”
I’m a little taken back. If he’s part of Axel’s team, shouldn’t he know?
“Should all be in the CliffsNotes, or can’t you read?”
His nostrils flare and he clenches his teeth hard, an angry flush spreading across his cheeks. I’ve seen this before. I brace myself, closing my eyes but all I see is Rix.
His hands gripped my shoulders as he pushed me back against the wall. I’m slammed so hard into the drywall, I left a dent as I let out a yelp. “Why? Why, Mac?” Rix yelled in my face.
“I-I’m s-sorry. I swear it won’t happen again.”
He huffed, his nostrils flaring like a furious bull, and I was right in his sights. Just when I thought he was about to come at me, he let out a loud growl and turned away, running his fingers through his oily hair. “You bet your ass it won’t.”
My shoulders began to sink, the tightness in them falling away as I exhaled a long breath of air. The relief, though, was short-lived as he suddenly spun back around, faster than I had time to comprehend, his palm connecting with my cheek so hard that I fell to my knees. I spat out a line of blood, tears forming in my eyes.
“You ever, and I mean ever… talk to Carlos in that way again, I’ll kill him.”
“He’s just a friend, Rix. I swear.”
He glared at me, shaking his head. “He’s my employee. And if he flirts with you one more time, I’ll put a bullet in his cock, then make him watch as I fuck you. Stay away from him.”
“Rix, please, stop!” I begged as he threw his hands in the air.
“After all I’ve done for you. Everything, Mac. I saved you. Show me a little respect!”
He kicked my foot on the floor as he huffed and turned, storming out, leaving me feeling lost and hopeless.
And for the first time, alone.
I snap out of my reverie and into the now. My eyes focus on the man in front of me, his eyes taking on the same dark tone that Rix’s always had just before he would strike.
“You have a smart mouth, how about I shut it for you?” His hand comes up gripping my face, his fingers digging hard into my cheeks. I whimper as he moves in so close, I can smell the garlic on his breath when he scoffs, his mouth curling at the corner. “What did you fucking tell them, Mac?”
Hearing him call me Mac kicks something in my mind. So, I push my hands into his chest and shove him back with everything I have. He grunts as his body goes flying backward, and I pant for breath.
I won’t let him manhandle me like Rix did.
Rix had a power over me, I always felt like I owed him, like I should be grateful for everything he had given me. But what he’d given me included a couple of black eyes, sprained ribs, and more than a handful of split lips.
I’d always felt like I deserved it, but just one touch from Axel and here I am, questioning everything. Wondering why I’m protecting a man whose touch has always felt like a punishment. Even when he tried to make it some kind of reward.
It shouldn’t be that way.
Maybe Axel was right, maybe things didn’t add up with Rix. Maybe he wasn’t always the savior I thought he was.
“Who the hell are you?” I spit out, widening my stance and staring down the asshole across the room.
His eyes narrow on me as he saunters toward me again. “I’m the person making sure you don’t say anything else to Axel.” He lunges for me, gripping my hair. I yelp, the pain searing through my head so intense as he throws me to the bed. Tears spring to my eyes as I land on my back. He rushes for me, but I pull my legs back and shove them straight into his groin, pushing him off me with excessive force.
He lets out a loud “oomph” as he falls to the floor holding his cock while I drive my now aching body to its feet.
“Well, asshole, I’m the person who just kicked your ass. And I need you to get the hell out before I make you really hurt!”
He slowly stands, his hands still cradling his balls as he stumbles to the door. “This isn’t over.”
As he walks out, I curl up my lip, trying to keep my chin up and my shoulders back. But once he closes the door and I hear the lock click, my legs give out, and I fall to the floor.
What the hell is going on?
Who can I trust?
I have no fucking idea.