Too Hexy For Her Hat by Susan Hayes

7

Luna wason the cusp of sleep when someone knocked on her door.

“That better be an unexpected late-night delivery of ice cream and fudge or I’m going to be very unhappy.” She staggered out of bed, zapped herself into a pair of pajamas, and wandered to the front door still grumbling.

She peered through the peephole. “Chad?”

“Hi.” Chad waved and flashed her a sheepish smile. “Sorry I woke you up, but we need to talk.”

Those words were never good to hear from anyone, especially not from your newly acquired boyfriend during a surprise visit in the middle of the night. Was he married? A secret agent about to be sent away on a long mission? Had Cupid’s whammy water been recalled due to surprising side effects?

She wiggled her fingers and several different kinds of magic-proof locks clicked open while she sent another spell to tidy up her place.

The sparks had barely faded away before she had the door open. “Come on in.”

He was different. She couldn’t say what it was, but the man who walked through her door wasn’t the same one she’d kissed goodnight a little while ago. She checked the time. A very little while ago. Trogs, trolls and jellyrolls. What had happened?

She expected him to do what guys always did when they had bad news to share. She was familiar with the pace-fidget-fuss-blurt-out-the-problem method most men used when they had to have a difficult conversation.

Chad didn’t do that. He waited until she closed the door and then caught her by the waist and pulled her in for a kiss that rocked her harder than an earthquake.

Okay… maybe this wasn’t about some kind of Cupid-defying breakup then. Any thoughts about what he was doing here went up in flames as the kiss intensified.

One hand in her hair, he planted the other firmly on her ass as he claimed her mouth with his. The boyish charmer was gone, replaced by someone who looked the same but acted differently. This version of Chad was… more. Edgier. And by all of hell’s handbaskets, she liked him this way.

“Talk. I came here to talk,” Chad muttered to himself several long, highly enjoyable minutes later.

“So you said.” She leaned back enough to see his face. “Do we need chocolate for this conversation?”

“All I need is you.” His eyes widened as he said it, as if that wasn’t what he’d planned to say.

Fair enough. It wasn’t what she’d expected to hear, either. “So, if you’re not here to dump me, what’s so important it couldn’t wait until the sun was back in the sky?”

“You’re in danger. The work I do…” A muscle in his jaw twitched. “I can’t really say much, but that snail Shifter wasn’t just a nosy neighbour. She was a threat.”

“Whoa. That was a lot of information crammed into a small package. Danger? From Dotty?” Then the rest of what he said sank in. He really was some kind of secret agent or law enforcement? And what did “was a threat” mean, exactly?

“Dotty was an assassin snail Shifter. I caught her outside your door when I came back here to warn you.”

“Dotty was an assassin?”

“Among other things. I had to confirm my suspicions before I said anything.”

“And where is she now? You said she was a threat. Past tense.” He wasn’t telling her something. Hell’s bells and wishing wells, there was probably a laundry list of things he couldn’t mention.

“She attacked me.” Regret shadowed his features, making him look older and world weary. “I had no choice.”

Oh my Goddess. “You killed her?”

Chad nodded slowly. “She was going to kill you. I would do it again if it meant keeping you safe.”

Now she understood what was different. The warlock standing in front of her had killed someone moments before she’d let him in. The way he was acting, it couldn’t be the first time he’d done it, either. Chad had secrets. Dark, dangerous ones that should have her questioning Cupid’s choices.

Should have but didn’t. Secret agent fantasies were her favourite, and now she was caught up in one with a leading man who was definitely worthy of a fantasy or ten.

It took her a moment to realize that wasn’t her normal approach to things. Something was off. Then it hit her. Stupid Cupid’s whammy water was messing with her head again.

Ugh. Falling in love really did make you dumber.

Part of her brain hit the brakes and wailed in panic as the “L-word” popped into her head. It would just have to take a number and wait for its turn. She had other things to panic about first.

“Is it over now? I mean, now that she’s gone. Am I safe?” She suspected the answer to that question wasn’t one she wanted to hear. Chad didn’t know her birthday was coming up, or what that meant. Could the two things be related? Goddess, she hoped not… but why else would she suddenly be targeted by a slimy assassin snail with terrible taste in well, everything.

Chad swung her into his arms and carried her to the couch, sinking down into it without letting go of her. “I don’t think so. Someone hired Dotty. Any idea who?”

“No. There’s some stuff coming up soon, but I don’t want any part of it.” None. Zip. Zilch.

“What stuff?”

She danced on the razor’s edge of the truth and hoped she didn’t slip. “There’s a reunion back in my hometown. It’s a big deal to them but not to me. I don’t have any family anymore. Well, except for my foster mom, Desi. And she’s more like a mentor than family.”

“Then I think we need to get you away from here for a few days. Maybe longer.”

“But where?”

“Anywhere you want to go. Mountains? Cabin in the woods? Private beach?”

The offer was tempting, and not just because it meant being alone and hopefully naked with Chad for a few days of indulgent distractions of the X-rated kind. “Anywhere at all? Then I vote for the beach. Somewhere with warm water and a spa because I’m still hoping for that massage you mentioned.”

“Done. I know just the place.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “Ready?”

“What? Now? Like, right now?”

He cocked a brow and smirked at her. It was an annoyingly sexy look for him. “I did mention the whole assassin threat. Right? You need to disappear.”

“And you need to understand that I require a few minutes to process this. Also, to pack.”

“You need a bathing suit and sandals.” He snapped his fingers and a shopping bag from some high-end store she couldn’t pronounce but recognized from her brief forays into human social media appeared in her hand. “There, you’re packed.”

“What colour?” she asked, eyeing the bag with suspicion.

“One’s black. One’s purple and black. Shoes are also black.”

That made her laugh. “Bonus points for paying attention to the little details.”

He wrapped a strand of her hair around his fingers and winked at her. “When it comes to you, there are no little details.”

And right on cue, the saxophone started playing again. “I think this is more of a violin moment,” she said aloud, as much to avoid having to address the swoon-worthy comment from her boyfriend as anything.

The sax faded away and the notes of a violin filled the air.

“Huh. It takes requests,” she said.

“And you’re changing the subject.”

“I’m not used to having anyone pay that much attention to me. Well, no one but the security in department stores.” She shrugged. “It’s a little disconcerting.”

“You’ll get used to it,” he informed her.

“Are you always this cocky?”

He grinned and deliberately raised his hips so she could feel the impressive length of his erection pressing against her ass. “Not always. Not until I met you.”

Her brain sparked, fizzled, and went into standby mode, leaving her mouth to run wild and unfiltered. Which is the only excuse she had for why the next words she said were so cheesy they should have come with nachos. “Is that a wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

“That is not just a wand. That is my wand. My wand of wonder, in fact. And yes, we’re both very happy to see you again.” His voice dropped to a sultry murmur. “Because I believe this counts as our second date.”

“The one with towels? Also, wand of wonder, really?”

Hissy snickered but didn’t make an appearance. “Really.”

Chad patted his pocket gently. “Hush, or I’ll turn you into a balloon animal and leave you floating around the ceiling. Maybe tie a pretty ribbon to your tail and let Beaker lead you around.”

Beaker made an amused little sound from his perch in the corner. “All the best familiars fly. It would be a promotion for you.”

“Ssshut your beak. Everyone knows the best familiars stay on the ground.”

“And I think the most helpful familiars are the ones that know when to stay quiet.” Luna shot a look at Beaker that made him fluff his feathers. “Flamingo. Remember?”

Beaker discovered a sudden need to preen his wing feathers and stopped talking.

Chad’s fingers moved in slow, sensuous circles over the nape of her neck as he asked, “Now, where were we?”

“Wand of wonder and towels.”

“Ah, right. I think towels should be an option. And as for my wand? Do not try to understand the mind of an adolescent male. That way lies madness. Trust me.”

He was joking, but the last two words whirled around her head like dandelion fluff in the breeze.

That was the question. Did she trust him?

Her heart wanted to scream that yes, of course she did, but that was more likely to be Cupid’s influence than anything else.

She couldn’t trust her own judgment right now, so how in the name of the Goddess’s gooseberries could she trust anyone else?

She could only think of one way. As much as it irked her, she was going to have to try to get a peek at Fate’s plans.

“I want to,” she said and then held out her hand and summoned her tarot cards. Doing a spread wasn’t going to be possible curled in his lap, so she’d have to make do with a single card draw.

“We’re doing tarot here? Now?”

“We are. We’ve both been whammied, which means our judgment is worse than a freshman college student on their first spring break.”

“What are we asking?”

Luna shuffled the cards, already forming the question she wanted to ask. “I’ll ask the question and then we do two one-card draws. Me and then you. Turn them over together.”

“For someone who doesn’t like Fate much—”

She cut him off with a wave of her hand. “I know. I know. But I need a hint, and this is the only way I can think of.”

“Not one for big leaps of faith?” His words were soft, and she detected a note of understanding.

“I have a lot going on right now,” she admitted. “So leaps of any kind probably aren’t a good idea.”

“Whatever it is, I want to help.”

She turned her head and kissed him. “You already are.”

That kiss turned into several more, each hotter and hungrier than the last. The toe-curling passion was enough to make her forget what she was doing. The tarot cards fell from her hand to scatter across the floor. She probably wouldn’t have noticed, but the moment was accompanied by a crescendo of dramatic music that made both of them sit up and look around in confusion.

“What now?” Chad asked.

“No idea. But since the soundtrack only seems to kick in during key moments… something happened.”

She looked down at her empty hand and then at the floor. “Oh. I dropped the… what the fuck?”

Almost every card in the deck had landed face down. Only two were face up, and their message was clear. Chad was worthy of her trust… and her heart.

“What?” Chad demanded, power flowing around his hands and lower arms as if he was preparing to fight.

“I got my answer.” She snapped her fingers, and the cards reorganized themselves and popped back into her bag. “So… where are we going?”