On His Knees by Tabatha Kiss

Chapter 53

Seth

Well, I fucked up.

I fucked up hard.

It’s all right,I could have said.

They didn’t know we’ve been... whatever the hell we’ve been doing.

We can talk about it later.

I trust you.

But... no. I stuck my foot right between my teeth and I bit down until I tasted blood.

Now she’s sitting at the campfire with Brad. Heidi and Drew, too. But mostly Brad. It’s been all smiles and laughs for the last hour. Jenna’s this. And Brad’s that. Jenna likes this and — what a fucking coincidence — Brad likes that, too! Match made in fucking heaven.

Guess Heidi got her double-date after all.

Fucking Brad.

“What are you doing?”

I flinch, twisting to look at Wilder beside me on the deck. “Nothing,” I say.

“You’re leering,” she says, studying me beyond the tip of her nose. “What are you leering at?”

“I am not leering. I’m... staring out into the ocean.”

“That’s a lake.”

“It’s water. It’s soothing. I’m looking at it.”

She squints. She tilts her head. She searches for answers she’ll damn sure find.

“I’m fine, Wilder.” I do my best to sell it, holding up my plastic cup that’s totally full of booze and not soda. “Really. I’m a little tipsy, but fine. All right?”

Wilder nods. “All right,” she says, smart enough to leave me be even though she’s clearly far from convinced. “Are you having fun?”

Loads.

“Hell yeah!” I say, raising my cup again as I glance around at my friends.

Until a moment ago, Wilder was lounging on the deck furniture with Corey, Ellie, and Devin. Harvey had a week between tour dates, so he made it out here, too. My entire chosen family back together again.

And Brad.

“I can’t believe we’re all grown up,” Wilder says. “Well, almost.”

I chuckle. “Yeah.”

“Pretty soon, we’ll all have careers. And responsibilities.” She shrugs a shoulder. “This might be our last beach party.”

I pause. I hadn’t thought of that. But she’s right. Harvey is blowing up more and more each day. Corey does... whatever Corey does. Devin’s in law school with a bright future waiting for him at his father’s firm and Ellie wants nothing more than to be by his side the whole way there. Wilder’s in grad school. She’ll be psychoanalyzing the masses in no time. Heidi’s well on her way to practically running the museum she works at. Drew, well... he’ll probably be Nora Payne’s apprentice for the foreseeable future.

Jenna is going to medical school.

And I’m...

Honestly, I’m not sure where I’ll be a year from now anymore.

This might really be our last chance to get together like this.

I glance up again, drawn to the sound of Jenna laughing across the beach. “Yeah,” I say, my heart racing. “You might be right.”

One last chance to change our lives. I shouldn’t waste it.

And I won’t.