No Chance by Lisa Suzanne
CHAPTER 34: BRETT
I collapse to the side of her and toss an arm over her waist as we both fight to regain our breath after the incredible sex. My shoulders are aching from where her nails dug into them. They might even be bleeding, but Jesus Christ it was absolutely worth it.
It was better than I imagined it could be.
It didn’t matter that she was inexperienced. In fact, I liked it that way. She didn’t hold the confidence I’ve become accustomed to, which made me feel like this was so much more than just a romp between the sheets.
That’s not something I ever thought I’d want.
Feelings involved with sex? Forget it.
But when I saw her cheeks redden with my dirty talk, I wanted to keep saying dirty things for the rest of time.
I feel a bit like I’m corrupting her, and somehow what we just did—vanilla sex on a bed—was so much sexier than a romp on the Ferris Wheel might’ve been. Don’t think for a second the thought didn’t cross my mind. I would’ve found a way to fuck her up there if she was just any girl.
But she isn’t.
She deserved the privacy of the bedroom, especially for our first time together...a thought which leads me to believe there will be more times.
God, I feel like a new man.
And what sucks here is that I want to fall asleep with her by my side for a few hours, but I can’t.
I have a private gig to get to. I don’t want her to feel like I’m ditching her after what just happened, but a glance at the clock tells me I should already be in Tommy’s room so we can finalize our short set. We have a meet and greet ahead of the show just like we did the night I met Hannah, and then we’ll have a short time to get into the right headspace before we take the stage.
And right now, my headspace is filled with Hannah. I like it that way. I turn in toward her and draw in a deep breath. She overwhelms my senses with coconut and some sort of voodoo magic, apparently, since these feelings in my chest are completely unrecognizable.
I press a soft kiss to her temple as I tighten my arm over her. “You are incredible,” I say. She glances at me nervously, and I realize then she needs more reassurance. I lean over her a little as I bring my lips closer to hers. “And that was intense and hot and fucking fantastic. I’ll be counting the minutes until we can do that again.”
Her eyes seem to soften at my words, and she reaches a hand around the back of my head as she pulls me down to her. We kiss slowly, sensually, tongue moving against tongue with an unhurried sense of passion, and then I pull back because I can practically hear the clock ticking in my ear.
“I hate to do this, but I need to get to Tommy’s room for a meeting before our gig.”
She nods, but I still sense the disappointment.
I kiss her once more then stand and head to the bathroom to get rid of the condom. When I emerge, she’s putting her clothes back on.
I shake my head. “It’s a real shame to cover that body up,” I say, and her cheeks redden as I find my own clothes.
“Back at you,” she says softly, and I laugh.
“You’re taking pictures tonight, right?” I ask.
She nods.
I move toward her and pull her in my arms once I’m dressed. “Then I’ll see you in an hour down at the car.” I press a soft kiss to her lips. “Give Chance a high five from me.”
She smiles, and then I head out the door, leaving a big part of myself behind for her to hold.
I run down the hallway toward Tommy’s room, and of course the meeting is already in progress when Karl opens the door for me.
“Sorry I’m late.” I’m panting a little from running over here immediately after sex. My body isn’t quite recuperated yet.
Tommy raises his brows. “You had sex,” he announces. He takes a gummy bear out of the little bag of them in front of him and pops one in his mouth.
All eyes in the room turn toward me.
“You’ve got that precious little glow you get after you were up in some pussy,” he says, his tone mocking. “Make my fantasies come true and tell me it was the girl.”
“Fuck off,” I mutter petulantly.
“Well if you’re not fucking her, somebody should,” he says. “Shit, I bet she’s got a honey of a pussy.” He takes another bear out of the bag, and he’s so casual about the way he talks about a woman who deserves more respect that anger boils in my blood.
I stand as my fists clench by my sides. “Fuck you, Tommy. Stay the hell away from her.”
He raises both brows. “Sit down, sweetheart.” He pops in another bear. “But maybe pull that stick out of your ass first.”
Red colors my vision.
How fucking dare he say shit about that poor woman?
She’s been through enough. The last thing she’d ever need is someone like Tommy Fucking Stevenson coming onto her.
She deserves more. Fuck, let’s be honest here. She deserves more than me, too.
I lunge toward him, but Tyler is quick to intervene. He grabs me by my shoulders to stop me from pummeling Tommy, who still sits there with a smug look on his stupid ass face, and I hiss at the ache from Tyler’s hands on my new scratches.
“Dude, stop,” Tyler says. “You know he’s just trying to get a rise out of you.”
I draw in a deep breath. It’s working. My fists are still clenched, but I back down and return to my seat.
Tommy opens his mouth to say something else, but Tyler jumps in as he shakes his head. “Don’t,” he warns, and it’s best he issues that warning before I make it past Tyler and punch that fucker’s jaw.
“Let’s get back to the setlist,” Karl suggests, and I sit fuming while the rest of them work it out. I don’t really give a fuck what songs we play. I never do. Yeah, there’s songs I like over others, but I don’t have a strong opinion either way, so I let them fight it out and I just sit back and do what I’m told.
Part of me wants to fight tonight, but only against the songs Tommy suggests. Even though I’m pissed he purposely tried to get a rise out of me, I’m still a professional. This gig tonight needs to be our main focus, and we can hash out the other shit later.
Even though it’ll be hell riding on a bus with him tomorrow as we travel to Detroit. I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.
I keep thinking Tommy will issue some sort of apology for being an asshole, but he never does. I try to give him the benefit of the doubt since we don’t have any time alone, but there’s always time to slip in an I’m sorry for being a doucheface.
It never comes.
Not when we’re done with our meeting and sitting around shooting the shit for a few minutes. Not when we get down to the car—which is fine since Hannah is present.
Not when we prep for our meet and greet and not during it—which is fine since Hannah is at both of those, too.
So when we finally get a few minutes alone in the back room of this tiny venue we’re playing tonight, I confront him. Tyler and Dustin are talking with Karl across the room, so I grab onto this moment. I don’t know how else to take the stage tonight with this guy if I don’t clear the air.
“You gonna say something about the dick things you said earlier?”
He gives me a strange look. “Nah, man. I don’t recall saying anything that wasn’t true.”
“What about the sick things you said about tossing a shot at her?”
“Oh come on, man. You know I was just playing. Besides, what the fuck do you care for?” he fires back at me. “You in love with her or something?”
I don’t respond right away because I’m not sure what the answer is here, and Tommy interprets my silence as a confirmation.
“Holy shit,” he murmurs as he stares at me. “You are in love with her.”
“I don’t know if I am,” I say. I run a hand through my hair, and then I grip onto the ends. I barely know her. “Maybe.”
“Did you fuck her?”
I nod even though the term fuck when I think of her seems somehow totally off. It’s indecent. What we just did...wasn’t. “Yeah. We had a nice date just the two of us at Navy Pier and then I took her back to the hotel where we took it to the next level.”
“Look at you being all romantic and shit.” He shakes his head with unfiltered disappointment. “You didn’t fuck her on the Ferris Wheel?”
“It’s not as easy as it sounds,” I defend, thinking back to the small car we were in with the lap belt stretching across both of us. It would’ve worked. I could’ve gotten her on top of my lap. But it just didn’t feel right in the moment.
He shrugs. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way. I can’t believe you passed up Ferris Wheel sex for hotel bed sex. What’s wrong with you?”
What’s wrong with me is that I actually feel something for this girl, but Tommy doesn’t exactly speak that language. He wouldn’t understand.
“Dude, if that’s the life you want, boring ass bed sex, then good luck. But just remember where your roots lie. You’ve been fuckin’ and duckin’ for years. All I’m saying is that there’s a reason why, man. Is that the life you want?”
I know he’s just looking out for me and trying to protect my best interests. The two of us have had extensive conversations about how the life Tyler and Dustin lead isn’t the life either of us wants, so he’s just reminding me. He’s probably worried I’m being blinded by her magic pussy.
But he’s also bringing up a valid point.
He may have just been teasing me, but there’s a reason I run. It’s ingrained in me. I’m not good enough for her. I’m not the kind of man who can be a loving father and husband because nobody ever showed me how to be those things. We already know that before I get too close, before I get too attached, I’ll find a way to fuck up what we’re starting. Since it’ll eventually end anyway, it’s better for me to duck out early. That way I can protect myself.
But that’s what’s different about this time.
It’s no longer just me I want to protect.
