DragonRider by S. Rodman
stable, hopping from foot to foot. Ri has already told me that the battle is over and everyone is fine, but I need to see the humans with my own eyes.
A sea of riders stream past me. It’s just like Cai and Harlen to be last, I can just imagine them lingering back, making sure everyone else is okay. I know that part of it is their job, but more of it is just who they are as people. It’s both endearing and infuriating.
Finally they emerge, strolling side by side. They’ve both shoved their riding goggles onto the top of their head and pulled their masks down under their chin. They are looking a little tired but none the worse for wear after being in a life and death situation. It’s so good to see them. I’m so relieved and thankful. The thought of anything happening to either of them is unbearable.
I fling myself at Cai and wrap my arms tightly around his slender body. He tenses and I can feel his shock and surprise, but I don’t care, I’m not letting go. I need to feel him. I need undeniable proof that he is alive and unharmed.
Slowly Cai’s arms move to wrap around me. His body relaxes into my embrace. I give him an extra squeeze before bounding away to throw myself into Harlen’s arms. Harlen chuckles and hugs me back warmly.
“We are fine, Kirby. There was no need to worry.”
I pull back a little, just enough to scowl at him. “You try waiting and then tell me how you like it!”
“Alright, fair enough,” he agrees, with just enough solemness in his brown eyes to appease me.
I step back, grab his hand and then Cai’s and start pulling them both towards their bedrooms, which are thankfully next to each other.
“I’ve got food and water in your rooms. And I’ve run you both a bath,” I tell them.
We reach Harlen’s room first and I shove him unceremoniously into it before continuing to drag Cai to his room, since Cai is the one who is going to be stubborn about being taken care of.
I push Cai onto a sitting position on the bed. Then I drop to my knees in front of him. My hands find the zipper on the inside of his long boot. The damn thing is stiff. It glides down reluctantly, the soft noise echoing around the quiet of the room. As it finishes its journey, I look up at Cai.
He is staring down at me, his head is tilted forward just enough so that his long blond hair tumbles over his beautiful face. His eyes are Mediterranean blue in this light and his look is intense. Regal. Haughty. He looks every inch like some fey prince and it feels right that I am kneeling before him.
My breath hitches. My heart flutters. I’ve pulled off one of his boots and now I’m just kneeling here holding it, like it is some sort of trophy.
This wasn’t meant to be a sexy thing. I meant it to be a caring and nurturing thing. I thought they would be tired after the battle, and looking after them was a small way I could help. But now the atmosphere in Cai’s room is charged. It feels like the slightest movement will cause enough friction to ignite the very air.
“You look good on your knees,” he whispers.
His words dance along my skin, leaving goosebumps behind. His tone is mocking. He is being demeaning, insulting even. But I don’t care. I think cruelty is his love language. I don’t think he knows any other way to be.
Slowly, purposefully. I put the boot down and then place my hands on his still booted calf. I hold his gaze as I languidly slide the zipper down. The metal parts seductively. Responding to my glacial pace. If he wants to play games, I can play.
I watch as his eyes darken and a faint sheen of colour brushes his pale cheeks. Satisfaction coils within me. A dark and hungry thing. I’ve won, and it wants more.
Cai reaches out. His fingers trail along my cheek before drifting down to cup my chin. Helplessly I lean into his touch. His eyes darken even more. He smells of dragon, sea spray and cool night air. I’m not sure who is winning now.
Harlen’s voice sounds out behind me, all drawling and suggestive. “Cai and I could share a bath, save water.”
Cai’s eyes blaze with fury. “Fuck off!”
I look over my shoulder to see Harlen’s reaction. The Dragonrider is leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over his broad chest. His dark eyes are sparkling and a smirk is on his lips. He appears completely unphased by Cai’s wrath.
“Spoil sport,” he says lazily.
Cai glowers at him. I can’t tell if he is angry at the interruption, or the lewd proposition. It’s possibly both.
“I made sandwiches!” I interject brightly. “I wasn’t sure exactly when you’d get back, so I didn’t want anything to get cold but I thought you’d be hungry because the siren sounded at dinner. There are some in your room too, Harlen.”
I gesture at the plate of sandwiches on Cai’s bedside cabinet. Neither of them even glance over, but the tension has definitely dissipated. Despite them both being locked in some sort of silent staring contest.
“Harlen, I’ve already run your bath. Go get in it before it gets cold.”
Harlen lets out a large dramatic sigh. “Fine,” he says before turning and walking away with the silent grace of a predator.
I knew it. I knew he was a player and that his attention was not just for me alone. Seeing it still stings though.
“Is he always such a giant flirt?” I ask without thinking about it.
I wince. Whatever the hell I just witnessed, it wasn’t harmless flirting and Cai being annoyed by it. I may be jealous and feeling slighted to be robbed of his attention. But something far deeper was going on between Harlen and Cai. Something that I cannot begin to decipher.
I cast Cai a worried glance, and then stare in disbelief at the soft tender smile that teases the corner of his lips. “He likes to take his chances. He thinks if he shoots enough shots, some are bound to hit.”
Now I’m super confused. Cai was acting as if he was about to murder Harlen a heartbeat ago and now he is acting as if he is fond of the other rider. What the hell is going on?
I’m burning to ask if they have ever slept together, either because of the full moon or just because. Ri said he preferred Zh and Je, but I don’t know if that has ever included at the same time, or if Zh and Je have been together. Ri would be happy to tell me in glorious detail, I’m sure. But that feels too sneaky and prying. A little sordid. I don’t need to know. It’s none of my business.
“Can I get you anything else?” I ask as I climb to my feet.
Cai shakes his head. “Thank you for all of this, Kirby.”
I flush. It’s only sandwiches and a bath and seductively removing boots. Cai’s tone is implying that I have bestowed a great honour upon him, when really, it was all the least I could do. Well, the whole boot thing was a bit over the top, but nevermind. It can’t be helped now.
“You’re welcome,” I mutter as I flee.
If I stay any longer, I might end up doing something that I would regret in the morning. Or not regret at all. And I don’t know which would be worse.
So fleeing is definitely the best option of them all. Flee and play it safe. That could be my motto. Except I don’t think I like it anymore. I think it might be time to embrace a new philosophy and live a little.
If only that thought wasn’t so scary.
The dream swirls through me, vivid and vibrant. Full of colour and sound and exquisite detail. I feel as if I am there. Invisible, unseen. A voyeur of the utmost skill.
It looks like Cai’s bathroom. Candles are dotted around the bath. Bubbles fill it. Harlen is leaning against the back, Cai is in front of him, leaning back against Harlen’s wet naked chest.
Cai’s skin is glimmering pale against Harlen’s olive tones. Harlen’s hands are under the bubbles, unseen, but I’m sure I know what they are doing. Cai’s expression is telling me that. His head is tilted back, resting on Harlen’s shoulder and facing the Dragonrider. His eyes are closed. His jaw is slack with pleasure.
Harlen is staring down at him. His eyes darker than the abyss. A smile tugs at his lips. Pride, possessiveness and a ruthless predatory satisfaction.
Cai is soft and pliant in Harlen’s arms. Every muscle is lax. He has surrendered completely and Harlen is loving it. Devouring it as if he is a dark demon and Cai’s submission is his sustenance.
My body shudders. It groans and writhes, and I am pulled back to it and consciousness. I gasp in a breath of air. It’s quiet in my room and the dawn light is streaming through my windows. It was very late when the riders returned from battle, I can only have been asleep for an hour.
My pyjama trousers are wet. What the hell? A wet dream? I haven’t had one of those since the early days of puberty. But the aftershocks of arousal and release are still trembling through me. And I can still vividly recall the dream. I swallow. That was a very hot dream. No wonder I came in my pants.
Unless it wasn’t a dream? Could it have been a psychic projection? Goosebumps erupt all over my skin. The scene I just witnessed could be playing out in reality right now. The urge to jump out of bed and run to Cai’s bathroom is strong, but I resist. If it is really happening, I was not invited.
A shaky breath escapes me. I hate that thought. I never thought I was the jealous type before but now I’m seething with it. Jealousy, rejection and yearning all have their toxic claws in me.
Okay, I need to take a deep breath and get my shit together. It was probably just a dream. No need to be hurt over a flipping dream.
I wriggle out of my soiled pyjamas and chuck them on the floor to deal with in the morning. Well, more morning than dawn, because I am sure as hell not getting up right now. I’m going back to sleep in my cold, lonely bed and dealing with reality later. Much later, hopefully.
I close my eyes, but it is a long time before I find sleep.