DragonRider by S. Rodman
what looks like a tack room. The smell of leather permeates the air making the room feel warm, homely and safe. Harlen is leaning over a wooden workbench, his hand gliding over a saddle as he oils the leather. His movements are sure, confident and gentle, and for a moment I’m thoroughly distracted.
Sunlight is streaming through the window behind him, illuminating him in soft golden light and giving him a halo. His attention is fixed on what he is doing and something about that level of focus, combined with the serene look on his face, is making my insides turn all fluttery.
“Why didn’t you tell me about the sex stuff!” I yell.
He is not bloody well going to distract me with his gently rippling muscles and his damn hands. No matter how seductively they are moving. I will not picture him running those frigging hands over my body the way he is fondling that leather!
Harlen looks up at me, his brown eyes wide with surprise. “What sex stuff?”
Dimly I’m aware of people scurrying out of the tack room. Good. I want to be alone with him. So I can yell at him. Definitely not any other reason. Absolutely not any other reason.
“Oh, you know!” I bite. “The whole full moon orgy thing!”
“I did tell you about that?” he says as his brows scrunch in confusion.
“You said the dragons did that, you failed to mention that riders are dragged along for the ride!”
His eyes grow huge and his face pales. His lips move a few times before he finally speaks. He does look truly mortified, and it mollifies me a little. Unless he is a fabulous actor, he did not omit this glaringly important detail on purpose.
“Oh, shit Kirby! I’m so sorry! It didn’t cross my mind that you wouldn’t know.”
“How the hell would I know?”
“I know, I know, I’m an idiot but I’m a rider, that stuff is like saying the grass is green and the sky is up.”
I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him. His excuse is pathetic, and he needs to give me more than that. He needs to do something to fix this.
“Let’s go see Cai,” he says as he jumps to his feet.
I blink in surprise as my mind processes his words. “Wait, what! Why?”
“He needs to know.”
Harlen grabs my wrist and tows me through the castle in a blur of speed. I have a brief moment to recognise the door to Mordecai’s office, before Harlen knocks on it sharply and walks in, dragging me behind him.
“Cai, I fucked up.”
“What else is new?” asks Mordecai drolly as he looks up from his laptop.
Seeing him with such a modern piece of equipment, on his fancy desk, in his fancy office, in his fancy castle where he bosses a bunch of people around who ride dragons, is surprising. Surely he should work from dusty old ledgers with a quill or something?
“I forgot to tell Kirby that the bond will drive him to enact Ri’s urges.”
Mordecai raises one perfect eyebrow. “You are a fucking idiot, Harlen.”
“I know,” agrees Harlen, sounding forlorn.
Mordecai sighs and then pinches the bridge of his nose. “The bond cannot be undone.”
“Hell no! I don’t want it to be!” I exclaim as a frisson of terror runs through me. I can’t lose Ri, I can’t lose this. Nothing would be worse than that.
Mordecai stares at me with his intense gaze and I can’t help flushing. “What do you want us to do?” His eyes are the colour of a stormy sea and that can’t be a good sign.
I shrug uncomfortably. “I don’t know.”
“Kirby is gay, so that helps!” says Harlen hopefully.
I glare at him. In what possible way does that help? My sexuality has nothing to do with my consent.
“Most riders are men,” he adds.
That surprises me, though thinking about who I have seen around the castle, it is blindingly obvious. I can’t believe I didn’t notice it.
“Why?” I ask. I’m distracted now.
Mordecai waves a hand dismissively as if the matter is beside the point, which I guess it is. “We only started presenting women to dragons recently. Yes, rider families are very sexist. Yes, we are trying to change that, but it takes time.”
Okay. There is not a lot I can say to that. Especially since he is giving the distinct impression that he does not want to discuss sexism in the rider community right now.
“Do you have a preference over topping or bottoming?” he asks calmly, as if he is asking if I prefer tea or coffee.
My flush deepens until I feel like my cheeks are going to burst into actual flames.
“Bottoming,” I mumble as I stare resolutely at the floor. I have no idea what he thinks the relevance is, but Mordecai asked me a direct question and I’m not brave enough to do anything other than obey him.
Mordecai sighs. “Well, at least your preferences align with Ri’s, it makes this slightly less of a disaster.”
“He can ask Ri not to fly?” suggests Harlen.
“That might work for a month or two, but this is Ri we are talking about.”
Great. My dragon really is a slut. Strangely, I feel kind of proud of that. I like that he is so free and unapologetic about who he is. And I really like that Mordecai and Harlen seem to accept him and his nature.
But the implication that I’m like Ri is damn uncomfortable. As is Ri’s earlier suggestion that it was one of the reasons he chose me. Logically, I can see the sense of what Mordecai is saying. If I was straight, I guess I’d be supernova freaking out right now instead of majorly freaking out. If I was a top, I’d be hugely freaking out. But this whole thing is still really freaky and my preferences don’t change that.
“What about asking Ri to choose Zh or Je? And only one? At least for Kirby’s first few moons?”
That strange heat is back, coiling low in my belly, making me feel all squirmy and out of sorts. I curl my toes and keep my gaze fixed on the floor. There is no way I can look at anyone right now, they’d be able to read me like a book.
“That might be the best we can do,” agrees Mordecai with a sigh. “Assuming you would be more comfortable with one of us, since you have spent little time with any other riders yet?”
I’m squirming in earnest now. My body seems to think it can twist away from all the uncomfortable emotions swirling through it.
“I guess,” I say with a shrug.
There is no way in hell that I’m confessing that sex with either of them would be a wet dream come true. It would be an honour and a privilege, if only I wasn’t so nervous about sex in general and very intimidated by them specifically. Do they have mirrors? Do they understand that they shouldn’t be deigning to share their bodies with mere mortals like me? Or do they understand that perfectly, but are helpless to their dragon’s desires?
Oh god. This is a nightmare. A very horny nightmare. In what, four days? I’m definitely going to be having sex with either Harlen or Mordecai. I swallow tightly, that fact is going to take some getting used to.
I’m going to spiral through excitement, anticipation, dread and terror. I wonder which emotion will be winning on the night?