Safeword: Mayday by Candace Blevins
Chapter 2
Heather breathed in the mountain air while she focused on the final safety check for a tandem hang-glide. It would be terribly easy to overlook things when the sky was electric blue and the weather was perfect, but she never skimped on safety.
She’d wondered why Marcus had suddenly wanted to hang-glide, but hadn’t asked too many questions. Sometimes the decision was immensely personal for first-timers, part of closing a chapter of their lives, or affirming life in a spectacular way. She was here to make it happen and not to act as therapist. Besides, Marcus was a psychiatrist, so she assumed he had people to talk to about that sort of thing.
Since he was Kyle’s best friend, she’d only intended to charge him what she had to pay for the tow-ride up, but he’d insisted on paying the price she listed online. He’d finally agreed to pay something between the two amounts, but only if she’d let him buy her dinner afterwards. Before she could turn him down, he’d suggested she talk with Kyle before answering him.
Not only had Kyle thought it a great idea, but he’d made it clear Marcus knew everything about Kyle, and he’d be okay with whatever they talked about while hang-gliding or over dinner.
She focused on remaining professional while she adjusted Marcus’s straps. Some people were uncomfortable with the places she needed to touch, tug, and pull, but he seemed fine. Strapping a stranger in is different than strapping your boyfriend’s best friend in, but Marcus seemed at ease as they talked about how it felt, how the weight would be distributed, and how he could — and couldn’t — safely reposition himself in flight if he became uncomfortable.
Marcus caught on quickly to her instructions on the ground, so before long they were being towed into the air by the ultra-light. The cool wind brushed her face, the details on the ground grew smaller, and Heather felt alive. Exhilarated. The planet below them, the air holding them aloft, the wind in her hair and face as she took in everything around them so she’d be prepared for whatever the sky threw at her. The cloudless day meant she couldn’t watch the air currents — she’d have to feel and sense them. Adrenaline pumped through her veins as she gripped the bar in her hands, sensing any changes while being hyperaware of the wings above her.
Thiswas why she scaled mountains, hang-glided, and kayaked the most dangerous rivers: otherwise, there were very few times she felt much at all. Most of the time, Heather merely existed — thinking and being without experiencing the normal input people’s bodies are supposed to give them about the world around them.
When the ultra-light finally released them and she was piloting them through the cloudless cerulean sky, she came even more alive, and Marcus’s whoop of pleasure beneath her made her want to vocalize as well, so she did, and then smiled ear-to-ear as laughter bubbled up. She loved giving people new experiences. She knew how to calm a tandem rider when they freaked, but she so much preferred it when they got into it as Marcus was.
She made a few sweeping turns and he seemed okay, so she made some tighter turns to give him a bit more of a thrill ride.
Of all the things Heather did to get her adrenaline going, this was one of the best. Flying like a bird was incredible. Soaring over the earth, the wind in her hair, looking down at the tiny buildings and trees, the feel of the air currents lifting the wings, shifting her body to alter the flight path and accommodate sometimes constantly changing winds — this brought her to life like nothing else. If transmigration was possible then in her next life she wanted to come back as an eagle.
After keeping them in the air as long as possible, she lined up and brought them in for a smooth touchdown in the soft, grassy landing zone. She helped him out of the harness, and Marcus picked her up, spun her around, hugged her and kissed her on the forehead, and then put her back down before dancing a little jig with her.
He was positively glowing as he told her, “That was incredible! Thank you so much! How long until I could learn to do that without you?”
Laughing, she answered, “If you’re interested in taking lessons, we can talk. I didn’t know you might want to learn. I thought this was just a one-time deal.”
“That’s what I thought, too. You know, on my list of things to experience before I die, but I had no idea how spectacular it would be. I felt like a bird, soaring through the air. Just… wow.”
She grinned at him, happy she’d been able to give him the experience. They needed to get off the field though, so she grabbed the glider and started pulling it towards the break-down area. “I’m really glad you enjoyed it. You said you didn’t want me taking it easy on you, so I gave you a wilder ride than usual for a first flight, and you seemed fine so I didn’t back off. I can be more daring, but I wanted to be sure you had a good first experience.” She gave him another look from head to toe and back up to his eyes. “Most people are a bit weak-kneed when they first start walking around, but you, Mr. Stick-in-the-mud, are dancing.”
“I can feel my knees more than normal, but I wouldn’t call them weak. That was perfect. I wish Kyle could enjoy it, too.”
She grimaced. “Not everyone enjoys this kind of thing. He hikes with me, but he doesn’t enjoy heights.”
Marcus sobered. “Yeah, I know. I wish I could help him with it, but until the two of you got serious, he didn’t want any more help. He dealt with his issues enough to be able to fly commercially, and that was as much time and energy as he’s willing to give it.”
She stopped walking and looked up sharply. “So, when he asked me to take him hiking to a cliff, it was for me and not him?”
“A little of both, maybe? He wants to enjoy what you do.”
Heather shook her head. “He hated it, and not only did he refuse to get closer than fifteen feet from the edge, he freaked when I got within ten feet of it.”
“I know, but he wants to keep going in the hopes it’ll desensitize him. I suggested he might hook up like a mountain climber, so he’d know the rope would catch him should he fall. If he can get close to the edge while secured to a tree, maybe someday he can do it without the rope.”
“I thought psychiatrists weren’t supposed to treat their friends?”
“I arranged for a psychiatrist and a therapist I respect to work with him when he was working towards being able to fly commercially. He signed off on both of them being able to talk to me about anything, and we all brainstormed about the best way to help him. The therapist did most of the office work, but I went with him on his first flight. I can’t be in charge of his file, but I can be part of the solution as long as the lead medical professional and patient are both on board with it. He hasn’t been back to see either of them in a while, and I’m okay with us having casual conversations for now. If he’s going to push hard though, he’ll need to see the therapist again.”
Heather suddenly had a bad feeling. She reached the edge of the field and began pulling the glider apart to stow it, focusing on what she was doing as she casually asked, “You aren’t wanting to have dinner with me to talk about the problems Kyle and I’ve been having, are you?”
“I’ve been wanting to get you to take me on a tandem flight since the second time I met you. That was how many years ago? It’s about time I finally managed to make it happen. I would’ve done this at some point no matter what, but yes, I was hoping to find the opportunity to suggest a few possibilities. I have a decent amount of experience helping children and adults with sensory processing disorder, so it’s not like I’d just be stabbing in the dark.”
Heather didn’t respond, but kept working to properly break the glider down and stow it and all of its parts in the carry bag. Marcus continued after a few moments of silence.
“Kyle’s important to me and he loves you. He’d do anything for you, but unfortunately the things he’s tried are likely the opposite of what you need. I’m not at all surprised none of his experiments were successful.”
He stopped talking, turned to her, and waited until she looked at him before continuing. “I know about this kind of thing, and if I can help the two of you find a resolution, then...” He shrugged, and Heather wasn’t sure if he didn’t want to finish the sentence out loud, or if he wasn’t sure how to end it. She went back to securing her gear while she waited for him to figure out what to say next.
“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he finally said with a sigh. “If you don’t want to talk about this with me then I’ll give you a card for a female therapist I have great respect for. Or, if you want to talk a little about options, I’m good with that, too. If you think it’ll be easier to talk in my office instead of over dinner, we can do that. Whatever you tell me will make you more comfortable, I’ll do my best to make it happen — but I think I can help you, so please give me a chance.”
She sighed. “Give me a little bit of time, okay? I need about fifteen minutes to get everything stowed away and handle some paperwork. Why don’t you change clothes and then hang out in the lounge, and I’ll come get you when I’m finished. I’ll need to change clothes, too. Just hang out until I come get you, please.”
Marcus looked as if he were going to argue, but then appeared to change his mind, and he turned and walked to the clubhouse.