Tortured Sinner by Tessa James

Claire - 39

This day couldn’t be any more perfect.

Johnny’s plan of saving Billy totally worked.

I may or may not have fatally poisoned my abusive ex.

My dream man asked me to be his girlfriend, and followed it up with an earth-shattering orgasm on the rooftop overlooking the most magical sunset I’ve ever witnessed.

And now, we’re at one of my favorite places, finishing off a massive stack of pancakes together.

“Hey.” Johnny reaches across the table and looks into my eyes. “Promise me you won’t be mad?”

“What?” His question throws me for a loop.

“Just promise.”

“Fine, what did you do?”

It’s then that I notice Bram approaching in my peripheral and everyone in the diner breaks into song.

“Happy birthday, to you…”

I turn back to Johnny, my eyes wide and my cheeks turning twelve shades redder.

“You promised,” he whispers in between lyrics. “Happy birthday, to my girlfriend,” Johnny adds in place of my name. “Happy birthday, to you.”

Bram beams and sets the plate with the blueberry old-fashioned down onto the table. “Happy birthday, Claire. Make a wish.”

I glance at the lit candle, and then at Johnny. In this moment, what else could a girl want? I already have everything I could ever hope for.

Except, there is one thing.

I suck in a breath and blow out the flame, hoping like hell my wish comes true. There’s only one more piece of the puzzle that needs to fall into place before Johnny and I can truly be free.

“Thank you,” I tell Bram.

He grips my shoulder and smiles. “You have no idea how hard it was to ignore you this morning when you came in for coffee.” Bram laughs. “I’m the worst with surprises.”

“I thought you were acting weird.” I poke my head around and wave at the cook, Carlos, before he makes his way back to the kitchen.

“And by the way, we’ve got your shift covered tomorrow, so no need to come in. Stay up all night doing whatever it is you kids do nowadays. Enjoy yourself.” Bram grabs the empty plates from our table.

I glance at Johnny, a few ideas of how we could occupy our newfound time coming to mind.

He winks in response, and my heart nearly flutters out of my chest.

Yeah, tonight really is perfect.

I split my donut in half and give Johnny the other side. “How’d you know?”

“You leave your wallet on the counter.” He breaks off a chunk of his and pops it into his mouth. “Good thing I pay attention to the details.”

How can such a random thing turn me on?

I grin and shake my head. “I really thought I’d sneak it past you.”

His expression shifts slightly. “Can’t hide anything from me.”

Suddenly, I don’t think he’s referring to my date of birth.

Johnny fidgets with his napkin. “When do you leave?”

“For where?” I nervously ask him.

He reaches back across the table to take my hand in his. “I get it.” Johnny nods. “I really do.”

“I’m not going anywhere, J,” I tell him, straight-faced.

“Claire…come on, I saw the letter. I just wish you would have told me.”

“Johnny, listen to me.” I squeeze my fingers around his to help him understand how serious I am. “I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d want me to go. I’ve already made my mind up. I’m staying here, with you.”

He blinks at me like he’s seen a ghost. “What?”

I stare into his radiant green eyes. “I’m going to tell the board on Monday to give the scholarship to someone else.”

“But I don’t understand. You worked so hard for this. I thought that’s what you wanted.”

“Home,” I throw extra emphasis on the word. “That is what I’ve been after this whole time. Anywhere with you is exactly where I want to be.”

Johnny sighs and runs his hand through his hair, leaning back into his side of the booth. “I’ve been holding my breath since I found that paper, scared to death you were going to leave.”

“Nope. You’re stuck with me, remember?” I cross my arms over my chest. “You second-guessing asking me to be your girlfriend now?”

He laughs. “Not in a million years.” Johnny pulls out his wallet and lays a few bills on the table. “Let’s get out of here.”

I hop up and slide my arm around his as we make our way out of the diner.

A weight is lifted from my shoulders now that we have that out in the open.

Johnny kisses my temple and slides his hand down to grip mine.

Suddenly, there's nothing except me and him and this endless flow of happiness between us. Six months ago, I'd never have believed my life would end up like this.

We walk in tandem, smiling at each other like the love-drunk fools we are back to our complex.

A woman bumps into my shoulder, sending me stumbling into reality.

“Sorry,” I tell her as she’s offering me her own apology.

Apparently, we were both in our own little zone.

“I’m thinking popcorn and movie in bed,” Johnny says while side-stepping another person on the sidewalk.

“That sounds great.” I grip his arm and glance up at him.

A loud crack sounds, and Johnny’s expression shifts to something of shock, fear, and confusion. Everything happens in a blur, our imperfectly-perfect world-shattering with the reverberation of a gunshot.

I lower my gaze to Johnny’s torso, frantically hoping my imagination is playing tricks on me. That the figure who appeared from the dark alley didn’t just do what I think he did.

Johnny drops to his knees and I fall to the ground with him.

“Oh God,” I manage to spit out.

“Claire.” Johnny holds his hands tightly to the seeping wound. His stare is weak but serious.

I apply what pressure I can. “No.” I shake my head, tears falling down my cheeks.

“I…” He pants a little. “I need you to know…”

“No. Not like this. Don’t you dare do it like this.” I bring him closer to my chest to support his weight from settling onto the dirty ground.

“I love you, Claire.” A bit of blood appears on his lips, and his body goes slack.

“No, no, no, Johnny!” I frantically plead with him. “Don’t do this. No. Please, don’t. Stay with me. You can’t leave me.”

But it’s no use, he’s already gone.

I turn toward the gathering crowd, desperate for someone to do something. “Help,” I scream. “Someone help.” My voice fades as my own will to live leaves me.

There’s this old saying, about how when you die, your whole life flashes before you, but no one ever tells you what it’s like to watch the light leave the eyes of the man you love. To see every ounce of strength wash away, until you’re left with nothing. I thought everything I had been through up to this point was a lot to handle, but not a damn thing could have ever prepared me for this.

For losing him.

It wasn’t memories of the past that came—it was all of them from the future. Every single thing we never got to do. Stolen kisses in the rain. Shows we’d watch. The mornings I’d wake up next to him, or in his arms. We had so much left to do. All of it was gone.

I knew we had a long road ahead to figure out all the details, but I thought we had more time.