Finding Ronan’s Heart by Melanie Moreland

Chapter Twelve

Ronan

The rest of the week flowed with a new rhythm. I worked during the day, being the Ronan my family knew. I designed and planned. Attended meetings, enjoying the give-and-take of the dynamics of our group. We all celebrated when Addi told us she was pregnant, confirming the little tableau I had witnessed not long ago.

“How did Bent and Maddox take it?” I asked.

Addi smiled softly. “They were both thrilled.”

Brayden laughed. “That’s an understatement. They were both more emotional than our moms. Dad called Richard to share the good news and wept like, well, a baby.”

Everyone chuckled. The serious businessmen who ran BAM all had incredibly soft sides for their family. Richard VanRyan was part of our adopted clan and Maddox’s best friend. He had been the first of them to become a grandparent when Gracie gave birth to Kylie, and he had gloated about it.

“No doubt he had lots of sage advice to offer.”

That brought out more laughter, especially from Gracie. Her father was confident, brash, and to some people, arrogant. But like the others, when it came to his family, he was a total pushover.

I wanted to emulate them.

I picked up Beth every night after her shift and, on Thursday, stayed with her as she baked the last of the cakes needed.

“Could you do this instead of waitressing?” I asked, curious as I helped her carry some wrapped cakes into the walk-in refrigerator.

“I would have to bake a lot of cakes.” She laughed. “I don’t think there’s a venue that needs as many cakes as I would have to bake to make up the difference.” She smiled at me. “Stop worrying about me, Ronan. I’m fine. It’s not forever. Once I’m done school, hopefully I’ll get a job and I won’t have to waitress or bake cakes anymore.”

I pinned her to the counter, caging her in with my arms. “But you’ll bake them for me.”

She looked up at me, the expression in her eyes vulnerable. “If you’re around,” she whispered.

“I will be.”

“Then you can have as many cakes as you want.”

I bent my head and kissed her. “Good.”

Friday night, she was done as soon as the diner closed. I was waiting in my booth as she came over, pulling on her coat. Once again, there was a mist in the air, and the breeze was chilly.

“You tired?” I asked.

“No, actually. I had a nap this morning after Evan left. Lucy was at day care and Paige was out, and I took the opportunity of a quiet house.”

“Would you like to come to my place for a drink?”

“A drink,” she repeated.

“Yes. I don’t want to go to a bar, but I’d like some alone time with you. Nothing more, I swear.”

“Okay,” she agreed.

At the condo, she was curious, and I watched her walk around. It was pretty sparse and, of the three places we had in the building, the smallest. A sofa and a TV that I rarely watched in the living room. A couple of high stools at the bar separating the kitchen from the living space. My bedroom had a king-sized bed and nightstands. That was it. There was a walk-in closet that held most of my clothes, but I made sure the doors were shut. My custom-made suits and dress shirts hung in there, and I wasn’t ready to have that conversation about my wardrobe or the need for it. The bathroom was simple. It was an older BAM building, not as luxurious as some of the newer builds, but still well-appointed. There was a small pool and workout room in the basement, and the security was good. It was an easy drive to the office and suited our needs. It wasn’t the place I considered home. It was modern and clean, and I was good with that. As I looked around and saw it with different eyes, I realized how un-homey it was. Paul’s and Jeremy’s places were both settled, well-furnished, and personalized. While going to school, we’d shared a larger unit on a different floor, but once we graduated, we’d moved in to our own condos. The difference I could see now was that I never planned to stay and they had. This was their home, whereas I was still looking for mine.

“No roommate?”

“Not anymore. I had two going through university. Now I like having my own space.”

“It’s a nice place,” Beth said.

I laughed. “Needs work. I’m rarely here.”

“These places are expensive, aren’t they?” she asked. “I mean, it’s downtown, in a nice area…” She paused. “Paige and I looked at a couple around here, but even pooling our resources, we couldn’t afford one.”

This was a good time to tell her about my family. That they were wealthy. That I was well-off. Instead, I deflected. “It’s an older building, and I guess I got lucky. All condos are expensive in Toronto. It’s only one bedroom and pretty small at that.”

“Oh.”

She waited for me to elaborate, but instead, I steered her to the sofa and went to pour her a glass of wine, then sat beside her. Luckily, she let the subject drop. She drew her legs underneath her and sipped the cold liquid. She hummed and ran her fingers through her hair. “Delicious.” She licked her lips, unconsciously sultry in her actions.

“Jesus, you’re sexy.” I spoke without thinking.

“Me?” she asked, sounding incredulous.

“Yes. Your curls, your curves, your smile. You’re so beautiful, and you have no idea, which makes you even more so in my books.”

She blinked, looking startled. “I had no idea you felt that way.”

I leaned forward, taking her glass from her fingers, setting it on the table, then dragging her onto my lap. I covered her mouth with mine and kissed her. I plunged one hand into her curls I loved so much, smoothing the silky strands between my fingers, and used my other arm to hold her tight. She opened for me, and I explored her, the crisp taste of the wine still lingering on her tongue. I only meant to kiss her once and let her return to her corner, but now that I had her in my arms, I didn’t want to let her go. I kissed her harder, delving my tongue into her mouth and finding all the sweet ridges, the smoothness of her teeth, the velvet feel of her tongue in my quest. She returned my caresses with enthusiasm, pressing herself closer, her legs splaying over mine so she straddled me. She wove her fingers into my hair, tugging and pulling, teasing the nape of my neck, making me hiss in pleasure. I was hard with desire for her, and I let her feel it. I wanted her to know how much she turned me on. When our mouths separated, I dragged my lips to her ear, after worshiping the smooth skin of her cheek and neck. “Beautiful,” I stated firmly.

She blinked at me, her dark eyes wide in her face. “I think you’re the sexiest man I have ever seen.” She ran her hands over my arms. “I have never met anyone like you. So strong and masculine, yet so sweet and amazing.” She swallowed. “You make me feel safe, Ronan.”

“You are always safe with me. Always.”

She bit her lip, glancing down between us. “You’re, ah, large everywhere.”

I chuckled. “All to make you smile, little bird.”

“Well, you do that just fine,” she responded.

Regretfully, I lifted her back to the corner and handed her the glass of wine.

“I don’t know how you do that.”

“Do what?”

“Lift me like I weigh nothing.”

“Do I need to strip you and show you with my mouth just how perfect your curves are? Happy to do so, but you’ll be here all night.” I paused. “And most of tomorrow.”

Her eyes widened to the point of hilarity. “Um…”

I leaned over and kissed her gently. “Whatever and whoever put those doubts in your head—forget them. I like your curves. They’re sexy as hell. I like how your hips feel in my hands. How fucking gorgeous your breasts are. Thinking of how you looked riding me, I can’t wait to see you ride me again and watch them. Touch them.” I lowered my voice. “Suck them.”

“Oh, ah…”

“Are we clear?”

“Yep.” Her head bobbed, her voice slightly higher than normal. “Curves good. Mouth standing by, ready. Big dick. Sucking…” She swallowed. “Good God, I’m rambling.”

Laughing, I kissed her nose.

“Another thing I find highly attractive. Now, drink your wine and tell me in detail about the weather system around us. I want to hear every weather-related word you got.”

She grinned, her color still high and her eyes bright. I was thrilled I made her look like that.

It was worth the aching balls.

At least for now.

On Sunday, I packed a picnic. I went to my favorite place in Port Albany on Saturday and picked up fried chicken. Then to the deli where I had them make up some sandwiches. Beth was bringing dessert—there was no point in even pretending to think about getting anything else.

I added some chips and snacks and filled a cooler with ice and drinks. I even remembered to add napkins.

After my errands, I stopped by my parents’ for a visit. We sat on the deck looking over the water. My dad and I talked about a new project they were thinking of undertaking, and he asked me to go over the building plans with him on Monday.

“Or tomorrow if you’re around,” he said casually.

“Oh, um, no. I have plans.”

My mom looked at me. “Again? With your friend?” she asked pointedly.

I shrugged. “A few people, actually.”

“You’re awfully secretive, Ronan,” she admonished.

Luckily, my dad stuck up for me. “Give him a break, Sunshine. He’s got a life. Let him live it. He doesn’t have to tell us everything.” He threw me a wink. “Does a man good to have some secrets.”

She tapped her fingers on the table. “Is that right?”

I tried not to laugh as he backpedaled. “When you’re young and single, I meant. Not when you’re happily married to the most beautiful woman in the world. Nope.” He shook his head. “No secrets then.”

She harrumphed and I chuckled. Luckily, she dropped the subject, and I left not long after, tamping down my guilt once again.

I was smiling as I headed to Beth’s. It was a warm day, although the weather report had indicated a change later today. I was hoping we would see some cloud formations and Beth could name them for me. I found it sexy when she spoke “meteorologist” in her lovely voice. She became animated and used her hands to indicate the various parts of the cloud she was detailing to me. I loved it.

The trunk was full of the food I had brought. I had a car seat for Lucy. The weather was good. It promised to be a grand day.

The kids were excited when I arrived, and I let Beth and Paige deal with getting them strapped in. Not for the first time, I was glad I drove a spacious car. I had an SUV as well, but it was parked in Port Albany. Once everyone was ready, we headed back toward the place I felt really at home. Part of me felt guilty that I wasn’t taking them to my house or the Hub, where my family would be hanging out—or at least some of them. I also felt guilty I hadn’t told my family about Beth.

Then I shoved down all those feelings. Today was about them, enjoying some fresh air, spending time with all of them, and getting them out of the city. I would deal with my family and everything around it later.

I bypassed the entrance to the housing complex. The kids were so busy spotting the water and the open spaces no one noticed as we went by. I drove a short distance and turned on a barely visible road.

“Is it okay to be here?” Beth asked.

I squeezed her hand which had been on my thigh most of the drive. “It’s private, but I have permission.”

“You know the owner?”

“Good friend of the family. I’ve done a lot of work for them.”

That statement wasn’t a lie. Bentley was a very good friend of my family. And I had done lots of work for the company and in the houses on the property.

I pulled up as close as I could. “It’s a short walk through the trees.” I looked at Evan. “I can piggyback you if needed. My dad used to do that with us,” I explained. “Sometimes more than one of us at a time.” We all used to dogpile on him.

He smiled, letting me know he wasn’t offended. “I’ll see how it goes.”

“Okay.”

Slowly, we made our way through the mostly flat path. The trees around us hid the high wall that ran the perimeter of the property. The thick forest to the right protected the houses from view as well. I set down the coolers and basket I had brought and opened up the two camping chairs as Beth and Paige unfolded the large blanket I had bought just for today.

I stayed with Lucy and Evan as they explored. The view of the water in the distance and the stretch of rocky beach they could see fascinated them.

“What’s around that bluff?” Evan asked, pointing to the right.

“Ah, private homes.”

“Whoa,” he breathed. “Do you think they can see the water?”

I nodded. “They have their own beach.”

“That is so cool. I would sit and watch the waves.”

I ruffled his hair. “Me too.”

“That house looks lonely,” he said, pointing to the house on the bluff in the distance on the left. Set apart from the main compound, the rocky cove was only accessible by foot over the jagged shoreline, walking through the trees and over this piece of land, or coming from the other direction to the driveway. It was the only piece of property around not owned by BAM. Not for lack of trying, but the old man living there refused to sell. The house was as remote as he was, although my family did check in on him, regardless of his rudeness. He tolerated the women a little better but hated all the men, so we stayed clear unless it was completely necessary. One day he fell, and I went to help my sister Ava get him inside. I carried him from the hard rocks into his little place, admiring the woodwork inside. He threw me out the instant his ungrateful ass touched the chair he instructed I place him in. I hadn’t been back since.

“Yeah, it does.” Evan had struck the nail on the head, and I felt another small tug of guilt. Maybe I should go back and try again. I didn’t care about the land, although Mr. Owens thought that was my game. Mrs. Owens had died when I was a kid, but I remember her being kind. He was alone, and I needed to try harder to be a better neighbor—even if he was cantankerous. Loneliness did that to a person.

We ate the feast I had brought while sitting in the sun. I felt some sort of caveman-type satisfaction knowing I had brought the food and looked after all of them. After lunch and the best brownies I had ever eaten, plus a slice of rich vanilla cake, we lay on the blanket, looking up at the puffy white clouds. I had made Beth study the sky, but she assured me there was nothing exciting about the clouds. She did, however, check her phone and break down the weather report for me, adding in a few extra words. I kissed her when the kids weren’t looking, in thanks.

“That’s a bunny,” Lucy said, her head on my chest.

Evan was beside her, and he shook his head. “That’s not a bunny.”

“What is it, then?” she demanded.

He pursed his lips. “It’s a dragon.”

She was silent. “I liked it better when it was a bunny.”

I chuckled and met Beth’s gaze. I patted my chest. “Plenty of room over here,” I said, crooking my empty arm in invitation. Again, that feeling of satisfaction swelled as she curled beside me and we all looked at the clouds as they drifted by. We found lots of bunnies, kittens, and flowers in the sky. A few more dragons and an alligator. Beth found a shoe. I enjoyed listening to them all.

Paige wandered around, sitting near the edge, her sketchpad on her lap, and she was busy drawing. Beth told me Paige had been so excited to come and hoped to be able to do a little sketching.

“Not much scope for nature in Toronto,” she explained. “Some pretty parks but they’re usually overrun with people.”

I was glad she was having a good time, and I had no problem spending time with the kids. They were highly entertaining, and I liked both of them a great deal.

They got quiet, and I realized I was now trapped under two sleeping bodies. Beth was silent, and I wondered if she had fallen asleep as well. I nuzzled her head, and she nestled closer, making me smile. The warmth of the sun sank into me, and I felt my eyes drifting shut.

A ten-minute nap wouldn’t hurt any of us.

I woke up with a start, something tickling my nose. I batted it away, hearing Lucy’s giggle. I reached over, lifting her high, opening my eyes to meet her excited face. She was holding a blade of grass, waving it. “I woke you!”

I pretended to lift her like a set of weights. “Yes, you did, Lucy-loo.”

I sat up and set her on her feet. Beth and Evan were by the overhang, and Paige was across from me on the blanket, her legs crossed.

“Still sketching?” I asked, reaching for my thermos and taking a long drink.

“Just adding in a couple of details,” she said, concentrating with a frown.

“Can I see?” I asked.

She held out the pad, and I flipped through a couple of pages. She was very talented, her eye for detail astounding. On the last page, my breath caught. It was a sketch of me sleeping, with the kids and Beth nestled against me. It wasn’t finished, but already, it was awesome.

“I’ll do some shading and filling in,” she explained.

“Can I get a copy?”

She smiled. “Of course.” She began to get up and stopped. “Oh. A lady was here.”

My stomach sank. “A lady?”

“Yeah. She said she lived in the houses over there.” She pointed in the direction of the compound. “I think she was shocked to see us, but she recognized you, so it was okay.”

“Did she give you her name?” I asked, keeping my voice neutral.

“No. She was younger, with dark hair and purple highlights. She seemed curious about us, you especially, being here, but I said you’d brought us for a picnic and had permission to be here. That appeared to amuse her.”

Ava. It had to be her.

Why the hell was she up here?She never came up this way—it was too rugged through the woods, which was one reason I loved the spot. I was guaranteed to find privacy.

What the hell were the odds that the one time I needed that privacy, she would show up?

I almost cursed out loud, but I managed to keep my frustration in check.

“She’s the daughter of one of the owners,” I said. “She is easily amused.”

“Well, she seemed nice.”

“Did she talk to Beth or the kids?”

“No, you were all asleep. I was sitting here sketching you when I heard a twig snap and looked up. She was standing there, looking confused and surprised. I went over and spoke to her for a moment, then she left.”

“I’ll speak with her soon.” I smiled benignly, knowing full well soon would be today.

And knowing Ava, she wouldn’t let this go.

I was busted.