Waste My Time by Kelsey Clayton
Haveyou ever met someone that you could just stare at all day? For me, that's Kennedy. I stare down at my phone with an involuntary smile on my face as I look over the picture Amelia sent me. The phrase pregnancy glow is tossed around but I never thought it was real. As I sit here looking at this picture of Kennedy, I see it.
She's radiant.
She's beautiful.
When Amelia said that her and Tye wanted to throw Kennedy a last minute surprise baby shower after everything that went down yesterday, I thought they were fucking nuts. I told her that there was no way they would be able to pull something like that off. I should've known better than to underestimate my little sister.
The door opens and Zayn walks in with Knox in tow. Behind them are two ugly mugs I haven't seen in months, Gage and Stone. The five of us were a crew in high school, ruling the place with an iron fist—normally one with some kind of bottle clenched in it. But then Knox moved across the country with Delaney and these two fuckers went off to college. Hell, even I did before I ended up coming back.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I ask with a grin on my face.
“You know, just being the last to find out our best friend is having a kid,” Stone grumbles.
I chuckle and shake my head, getting up to give them each a bro-hug.
“Don't listen to him,” Gage tells me. “His girlfriend has just been getting on his case about getting engaged or having a kid, and he's blaming you three.”
Stone throws his hands in the air. “Well if she didn't hear about all of this news when I did, which was all at once, by the way, I wouldn't have a damn issue!”
Knox, who disappeared into the kitchen when they got here, comes out with beers for all of us. He shoves one into Stone's stomach a little harder than necessary.
“Drink this and pull the thong out of your ass,” he tells him. “Commitment isn't the worst thing in the world.”
Gage scoffs. “Says the guy who was practically allergic to it in high school.”
He has a point. Before Delaney came along, we were sure he would die single. Probably with his dick buried inside some chick, but single all the same. But from the second she barged into his life, he no longer had eyes for anyone else. Not even when we went to the strip club for Stone's eighteenth birthday. And that was long before they so much as kissed. Tits were practically in his face, and he was staring down at his phone, texting Delaney.
“What's that saying?” Knox asks. “All it takes is finding the right person?”
Stone laughs and damn near spits out his beer. “Fuck me, man. He's turned into Nicholas Sparks.”
Knox glares at Zayn. “Remind me why we needed to invite them?”
“Easton's bro-shower!” he exclaims, and I'm almost positive he's high as a kite.
“What the fuck is a bro-shower?” I ask.
Zayn chuckles. “Well, this narcissistic son-of-a-bitch was annoyed that he wasn't invited to Kennedy's baby shower.”
“Still bullshit,” Knox grumbles.
Z waves him off. “So we decided to throw you a bro-shower, with beer!”
“Pretty sure that's not a thing,” I murmur.
Gage watches Zayn with pure amusement. “It's not, but can I please have some of whatever you smoked?”
Knox throws himself onto the couch. “He makes it sound like this was all my idea. He's the one who wanted to throw you a party, but a I'm sorry we thought you were on drugs party is definitely not a thing.”
“Okay, fine,” I cave. “A bro-shower it is. But if you guys expect me to play pin the diaper on the baby, we're going to have some issues. Especially cause I'm pretty sure Zayn couldn't do that right now even without a blindfold.”
Smirking, Knox shakes his head. “We've got better ideas.”
THE NEXT COUPLE HOURSare spent chugging beer out of baby bottles and racing to see who can change a diaper on a baby doll the fastest. The loser becomes beer bitch for the next round, needing to go into the kitchen to get us more beer. It's all shit that I never saw myself doing, and yet I'm having the time of my life doing it. It's the Knox version of a baby shower.
In between games that make me question our sanity, we sit around and bullshit—reliving memories from high school and before. The four of them share a couple blunts, but I sit out. While marijuana wasn't the drug I had an issue with, it's still a drug, and I don't want Kennedy to get the wrong idea.
“So,” Knox says, with eyes glazed over. “Are you prepared for birth? Because I heard women poop on the table.”
Stone starts to giggle. “That can't be true. Girls don't poop.”
Gage stares at him like he's an alien. “How you've made it halfway through college is the eighth wonder of the world.”
“No seriously,” Knox presses. “They poop when pushing out the baby!”
Sometimes it sucks being the only sober one, though this beer is giving me a decent buzz. “A whole ass baby is going to be coming out of a hole no bigger than my cock. Whether or not she poops is really not my concern there.”
Knox snorts. “Suit yourself. But you'll never be able to unsee that.”
“What are you going to do when you have a kid?” Zayn asks. “Just not look?”
The smile is wiped straight from Knox's face. “In what world do you think I'm having a fucking kid?”
“The world where Delaney wants one,” I point out.
Zayn continues for me. “She'll look at you with those Bambi eyes and tell you she wants to have a baby, and like usual, you won't be able to deny her. Anything she wants, it's hers. Face it, Vaughn. You're whipped when it comes to her.”
He sits there and stares into his beer for a minute before throwing his head back against the couch. “Oh shit, I'm going to have a kid. What am I even going to name it? It better not be a girl. If I have a girl, chastity belts will be coming back in style. I don't give a fuck.”
Reaching over, Zayn pats him on the shoulder. “Don't worry. I'm sure that's still at least a couple years out.”
“Better be,” Knox groans. “I don't want to share her. Not yet.”
Until now, that's one thing that never occurred to me. I'm going to have to share Kennedy. But when I think about it, there's something about picturing her rocking our baby to sleep that makes me okay with that. And besides, it keeps her in my life for the long term. Like Knox said earlier, commitment isn't the worst thing in the world.
“So,” Gage changes the subject. “Did you go to any baby classes yet? Like Lamaze or whatever?”
“The fuck is Lamaze?” Knox spits. “Sounds like yoga with llamas.”
“Yoga with llamas?” Zayn deadpans. “Seriously?”
Knox shrugs. “They do it with goats, apparently.”
We all stare at him, dumbfounded, until I open my mouth. “What do you do, just sit around and Google useless facts all day long?”
“Ay! Knowing women shit when giving birth is not useless. Just you wait. You're going to call me afterward and tell me you can never look at Kennedy the same way again.”
I roll my eyes and focus back on Gage. “No, we haven't. I don't think we need it, though.”
“Bullshit you don't,” he says. “When my mom was pregnant with half-brother number three, she took step-daddy-dearest to Lamaze, and he had to learn how to tell her to breathe.”
Knox's face contorts in horror. “They fucking forget how to breathe, too? Nope. Never having a kid. I don't care what Bambi wants.”
Stone is laughing so hard he forgets how to breathe, while Zayn just watches Knox like he's the most interesting thing he's ever seen. Meanwhile, Gage pulls a Lamaze tutorial video up on his phone. It shows a man sitting behind a pregnant woman as he walks her through breathing techniques that help with the pain of contractions. Knox, being the little shit he is, gets up and grabs one of the baby dolls before shoving it under his shirt.
“Come on, Daddy,” he says to me with the utmost seriousness. “You're going to walk me through birthing this thing.”
I stare back at him, emotionless. “Call me Daddy again and I will literally vomit all over you.”
“Better get over here then.”
He sits on the floor, and I reluctantly get up and sit behind him. He leans back against me and bats his eyelashes.
“Darling, I'm scared,” he says with a southern accent he definitely doesn't have.
I chuckle. “It'll be fine, Sweet Cheeks. Just breathe.”
He throws a hand on his forehead dramatically. “But I forgot how! We never went to llama yoga!”
“I can't do this,” I say, going to get up when Knox screams.
“Don't leave me!” he shrieks. “I'm having our baby and it hurts! Help me breathe, Pudding!”
Zayn jumps up from the couch and positions himself in front of Knox, like he's going to catch the baby when it shoots out like a football. Meanwhile, Gage and Stone breathe the way I'm supposed to be telling Knox to do.
Hee hee hoo. Hee hee hoo.
Knox mimics the breathing pattern with the dramatics of a teenager just reaching puberty. As he pretends to push, he pulls the baby out from under his shirt slowly.
“I see the head!” Zayn shouts, putting his hands out like a fucking quarterback. “Dr. Bronsyn, ready for delivery.”
We're all doing the Lamaze breathing technique with the baby halfway out from under his shirt, and he's so invested in his character that he's sweating, when the door opens. Kennedy, Amelia, and Delaney stand there, staring at us like a circus act. We all go still for a moment, before Knox jumps right back into character and makes some sort of animalistic noise as he pulls the baby out from under his shirt. Zayn catches the baby doll as it goes flying, and Knox sags against me like he actually just birthed a child.
Amelia is laughing so hard I think she might actually piss herself. Kennedy looks like she's never been so confused in her life. And Delaney? Well, Delaney just pinches the bridge of her nose and shakes her head.
“Why do I find you attractive?” she murmurs.
He smiles his best Knox smile up at her. “It's you and me forever, Bambi.”
A FEW DAYS LATER, I'm walking through the baby store with Kennedy as we pick up the rest of the things we need. She got a lot from the shower, our friends being rather generous, but Tessa gave her a $1,000 gift card for anything we still need and didn't get. I follow dotingly behind Kennedy, knowing that if I take the lead, we'll just walk in circles. I don't know the first thing about what's needed for a baby, other than clothes and diapers.
We go through the aisles as she picks out things like bedding, a mobile, and pacifiers. When we get near the bottles, I notice a weird looking machine. I pick it up and look it over. There's a mask looking cup thing with a bottle underneath it, and it connects to a machine.
“What is this?” I ask, putting it to my mouth. “Some kind of breathing machine or something?”
Kennedy looks over at me and smirks. “That's a breast pump.”
In an instant, I toss it back on the shelf like it's diseased and start wiping my mouth vigorously. Kennedy chuckles and shakes her head as she starts walking away.
“Relax, dummy,” she calls back. “It's unused.”
I sigh in relief and follow behind her again, refusing to touch anything else.
I've learned my lesson.
WE GET BACK TO my place a few long hours later. I pull into the driveway and can already tell Kennedy is tired. She might not quite be ready to pop yet, but being over halfway through her pregnancy, being on her feet is starting to become more difficult than it used to be.
“Why don't you go inside and sit on the couch,” I suggest. “I'll carry all the bags in.”
She shakes her head. “I can help. Honest. I'm fine.”
I give her a knowing look. “You're not, and that's okay. You're tired from making our tiny human from scratch all day. Go relax. I've got this.”
Her shoulders sag as she gives in, and she smiles thankfully as she climbs out of the car and heads inside. I manage to grab all the bags within three trips, and by the third, Kennedy is fast asleep on the couch.
I walk carefully over to her, making sure not to wake her. She looks so beautiful as she sleeps peacefully. Her shirt rides up slightly and reveals her bump, and I've never felt such a possessiveness over anyone in my life. I want to stand here and guard her as she sleeps, making sure no harm can come to her or our baby.
Grabbing the blanket from the back of the couch, I drape it over her and press a soft kiss to her forehead. Once she's tucked in, I sit on the floor in front of her and lean my head back, allowing myself to feel close to her.
It's warm.
It's comforting.
It's everything.