Forget Me Not, My Scottish Love by Allie Palomino

Chapter Ten

After a well-rested two weeks, Abby felt better than she had in a long while.  While she’d slept in Cameron’s room, he hadn’t slept there with her.  She didn’t know where he rested at night, but it certainly had not been with her.

Mayhap he didn’t find her appealing. 

Even as Cameron avoided her at night, Alice insisted fussing over her throughout the day.

“Ye need to eat more, Abby.”

“Alice, I cannot have a morsel more.  The mincemeat pie was savory and the fruit was excellent.  I have had two servings each of bread and cheese.  Please, I cannot.”  Abby laughed at Alice’s wink.

“Aye.  Ye’ve broken yer fast verra well this morn.”

She looked healthier.  Her coloring had improved.  Bess had given her a sleeping tonic for the last two weeks, but thought it best not to give her anymore for fear that she would not be able to sleep without it.  The sleeping tonic placed her in a deeper sleep than her draught had.  The rest had done her well.

The old cuts on Abby’s arms had not faded.  It was a miracle no one had seen them yet.  Her doubts as to whether something had cut her or she cut herself continued to plague her.  Either instance did not speak to her sanity.

If they found out, would they make her leave? 

Abby knew that Cameron’s family had taken a liking to her, but would they want him married to a daft woman?  If they put her out, where would she go?  As much as she loved her mother, one thing was certain- she wouldn’t be returning to her family’s home.

No, she needed to stay here.  She needed to hide this and her wavering mental state from everyone.  She felt safe with Cameron.  Abby wanted to be with him and no other.

As had become routine, Amy and Abby sat in front of the hearth, where they played with Owen.  Amy left Abby to care for Owen for a moment.  Sitting in front of him on the floor, she waved a scrap of plaid that Amy had been using to entertain him.  In the next instant, a large ember bolted out of the hearth and onto Abby’s sleeve.  She yelped in surprise and tried to use the scrap of plaid to ease the burning sparks.  She began to cough through a small cloud of smoke.  The baby began wailing. 

Cameron stood nearby speaking to a few clansmen and looked over when he heard Abby’s cry of surprise.  He saw her trying to smother her sleeves.

“Abby!  Abby,” Cameron said, running over to her.  He poured water over her left arm.  It doused the small remaining sparks that left behind holes in her sleeves.  Cameron looked at her face.  It was distorted with pain.

“Get Bess!  Now!  She’s been burned,” Cameron yelled, cursing himself.  He cannot even keep her from harm.  His own wife!

Abby shook her head.  “Cameron, please.  There’s no need.  I’m alright.  Don’t fuss.”

He was touched that she would try to comfort him, but it didn’t make him feel better.  When would he stop disappointing her? 

Bess came with medicine jars.  She clucked.

“My, my, Lady Abigail, let us hope ye doona ‘ave some bad burns ‘ere.”

“Oh, Bess, there’s no need.  This is nothing I cannot see to myself.”

Abby tried to mask her pain.  It wasn’t agonizing, but her skin was throbbing.  She did not want Bess fussing over her, concerned that her cuts would show.  Abby kept her breathing even.  Her eyes were watering and she was biting her bottom lip.  Cameron noticed that it trembled.  He heard her inhale a shaky breath. 

“Nay.  Ye’re in pain.  She must attend to ye.”

“Hold still while I peel back yer sleeves.”

“Must ye?” Abby asked, sounding worried.

“I must.  The sleeves may cling to yer skin, an’ make the burns much worse.  It must be done now.”

Abby was concerned about what the family’s reaction would be to her cuts, but it could not be helped now.  Bess began to peel the burned sleeves and washed it gently with a greenish liquid that stung lightly, but not overly.

“Does the liquid hurt, Abby?”  Cameron’s stare was intense.

Abby shook her head, not trusting her voice.  She was nervous.

Bess clucked again.

“What are those scratches and bruises, Abby?” Alice asked.

Abby looked up nervously.  Cameron saw her nostrils flare slightly and she bit her bottom lip again.

“These ar’na scratches, Alice,” Bess looked up at Alice and then to Cameron.  Her eyes settled on a very silent Abby.

“What are they then?” Amy asked, rocking Owen to sleep while she stood watching.  The baby had been in hysterics with the excitement.

“They’re slashes.”

“Slashes?” Alice asked.  “Abby, what have ye been doing?  What would cause ye to be cut like this?”

Cameron looked down at his wife’s forearm.  He lifted the sleeve of the other even while Abby tried to push his hand away.

“Abby?”  Cameron’s eyes held a wealth of questions.

The cuts were diagonal mostly, and they weren’t just a few.  Several cuts lined the inside and outside of her forearms.  They were red, some faded and some in a darker hue, signifying that some were recently made.

“Who did this to ye, Abby?” he asked in an even calm voice.  He clenched his teeth and pursed his lips.  Cameron made fists at his side. 

She looked up.  “No one, Cameron.”

“Ye’re lying.” 

It was an accusation as much as it was a statement.  Fresh tears fell from her eyes.  She looked away and remained silent.

Alice looked sternly at her son.  “Sweetheart, did someone do this to ye?”

Abby remained silent while more tears slid from her eyes.  She shook her head.

“Abby, tell me the truth,” Cameron said, coming to eye level with her.  He forced her to look at him but she avoided his gaze.  “Please.”

Abby groaned as Bess spread a green salve.  Next, she wrapped Abby’s arms.

“Tell me,” Cameron demanded.

“I don’t know.”  Her whisper was so light, they had to struggle to hear her words. 

“What do ye mean ye doona know?” Cameron’s voice raised a notch.

“Ye’re frightening her, Cameron.  Calm down.”

“Calm down, Mother?  Someone has been attacking my wife, and my wife refuses to tell me who it is.  I willna calm down!”

His eyes never left Abby. 

“Tell me who it was!”

She shook her head.  “I don’t know!  I don’t know!”

“Ye doona remember how ye got these?  Wouldna ye know how?”

Abby was sobbing now.  What should she do?  Tell them about the odd occurrences or tell them she did it and didn’t remember?

Everyone stared at her.  Her vision blurred as the tears fell unrestrained.

“Ye can tell us, dear.  We care verra much about ye.”  She felt the warmth from Alice’s eyes.

“Yes, we do,” Amy added.

“Abby, tell us who did this,” Keith asked.

“We’ll take care of it.”  Aidan nodded to enforce his promise.

“Abby, tell me,” Cameron demanded.

She shook her head, putting her hands over her ears.  The pressure was too much.  Too many voices were urging her!  Her own mind was reeling.

“Stop!  Stop!  No more!” she sobbed.  “I don’t know how they occurred.  Odd things have been happening and I haven’t wanted to say anything.  I see things move.  I see someone in my periphery.  I…”

She looked up at them.  All of their faces mirrored their confusion.  She thought she saw disbelief in Cameron’s eyes, and she cried softly, defeated.

“She’s absolutely mad!  Look at her.  Pretty soon she’ll be saying she saw fairies in the glen.  I knew she was off-perch, but never did I believe she wholly lacked sense,” Gillyanne sneered.

“Damn it!  Leave!” Cameron roared.

Abby huddled closer to herself.

“Oh, Cameron, honestly.  Ye doona have to wait the full year to have this farce of a marriage annulled.  With her being unwell of the mind, frankly a mild term for what she has, that should be sufficient grounds.  Then ye and I can be together without hiding our affairs,” Gillyanne responded.

“Ye’ve never been good at hiding anything, Gillyanne, much less yer rampant appetites for men or yer forgotten garments,” Keith retorted.  “Aiming a bit high, are we?”

She looked at Keith and opened her mouth to respond, when Cameron said, “Patrick, get her the hell out of here.  Gillyanne, ye’ve a fortnight to pack and leave.  I would force a lady into a tough plight, but ye’ve demonstrated that ye’re no lady.”

“That’s not what ye said last night, Cameron.  Did he show ye how he likes his women Abigail or has he not bedded ye yet?  Nay, probably not.  Ye’re not to his taste in women.”  Gillyanne upturned her nose.  Her plan to try to cause more doubt in Abby’s broken mind was working.  She smiled as Abby watched her.

“Get.  Out.”

They all looked at Abby as she growled those words.

“GET OUT!”

Gillyanne sneered.  “Temper, temper, Lady Abigail.  ‘Tis nay becoming.”

“Neither is spreading your legs for any who crosses your path.”

Gillyanne’s voice hitched in outrage at Abby’s retort. 

“Ye are a whore in every sense of that word.  Doona disrespect my wife, ever again.”  His eyes were cold as his jaw clenched.  “I’m sorely tempted to have yer arse tossed out with the remainder of the dung at this moment, rather than wait a fortnight.”

Gillyanne had never heard him speak to her like that.  She began to back up when something from behind Cameron’s tall form came toward her.

“Get away from me ye eccentric woman,” Gillyanne yelled.

Abby slowly made her way in front of Gillyanne.  She stared at her for a long moment.

“Do something!  She’s not well of mind!  She keeps staring at me!” Gillyanne said frantically, pointing her finger at Abby.  She made the sign of the cross.

“You have a fortnight to get out of my home.”  Abby’s tone was scalding, her temper simmering to just below a boil.  She’d had enough of this whore.  Nay, she would be docile no more!

“Yer home?  This isna yer home.  Ye havena even consummated yer marriage yet.  Ye could never be a lady to this laird.  He’s too much man for ye.  Ye’re weak, meager, cowardly and mad.  There’s nay doubt as to why Cameron hasna touched ye!”  Gillyanne looked down at Abby, who stood shorter than her.

The crackle of the slap reverberated in the room.  The force of it made both women cry out.  For Abby, her arm hurt.  For Gillyanne, her cheek hurt as her head snapped hard to the side.  She brought up her hand to cradle her red cheek.

“Look what she did to me, Cameron!  Ye canna allow her- this, this mad woman- to hit me!”  She took a moment to inhale a shaky breath.  “Ye’re so pathetic, a meager creature who’s bitter and crazed!”

Another slap, this time snapping Gillyanne’s head to the other side.

“A fortnight, Gillyanne, and no more.  Be glad I gave you that, for one more word from you and I’ll toss you out now on your sorely overused rump myself.”  Abby’s green eyes flashed.

Gillyanne looked to everyone around her, mouth agape.  Not one friendly stare greeted her.  They stood witnessing the spectacle, some laughing.  She groaned and pouted, stomping off in a huff of anger.

Abby turned around and faced the family, surprised to find them, Cameron included, with broad smiles on their faces.

“I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about, dear.  That was fantastic!” Alice said clapping.  “Wish that I could have done so myself.”

Her returning smile was small.  The stress and tension of the evening were overwhelming her.  She moved away from them and sat in a chair in front of the hearth.

“Just leave me, please,” she whispered.

Cameron kneeled next to her.

“Who did this to ye, Abby?  Tell me so that I can avenge ye.”

Cameron gently passed his palm down her head, and combed his fingers through her hair. 

Abby looked up at him, straight into his fathomless silver eyes.  “I don’t know.”

“Why willna ye tell me the truth, Abby?”

It hurt him more than he cared to acknowledge that she could not be forthright with him.

“I’m very tired.  My head is throbbing.”  She looked away from him and he felt dismissed.  “Bess, if you’ve completed your ministrations, I would like to go rest now.”  Her voice sounded tired and defeated.

“Aye, Lady Abigail, they are complete.” 

Abby nodded, and walked towards the stairs.

“Abigail, tell me the truth.”

Abby turned. 

“You already know the truth, Cameron.  You married a crazed, mad woman, someone who lacks soundness of mind.  That is the truth.  Confront it, and do what you must.”

Abby shook her head at him when he tried to approach her. 

“Nay, Cameron.  I need to be alone.  Speak to Alexander and begin the process for annulment.  You had no knowledge of my incapacity, and I’m certain that Alexander hadn’t an inkling either.  Petition whoever needs petitioning.  After it is done, find someone worthy of you.  There may be hope for me yet.  There may just be one man in England who’s desperate enough to marry a crazed woman for her sizeable dowry, and who has chattel equally as grand to offer my father.”

Abby ascended the stairs.

“Bess, what can we do?  Since she’s been here, she claims to have seen things move or someone in the periphery,” Alice desperately asked.

Bess shook her head.

“I am unsure.  ‘Tis ‘er mind.  ‘Tis the only cause that occurs to me.  Perhaps, somethin’ is amiss an’ she does this to ‘erself, or mayhap she never regained her faculties an’ never will,” Bess said, looking sad.

“Nay.  I willna accept that!  Her mind is nay unsound, damn it.”  Cameron hit the solid stone wall with his tightly clenched fist.  He left the room with their eyes on him.

Once outside, Cameron breathed in the air.  It invaded his lungs as the sun’s mild beams bathed him.  It was a nice day for this time of year.

She could be taken away.

His thoughts returned to Abby. 

Cameron’s breath left him.  For years she had been in his head- her screams, her haunted eyes, and even the trust she showed in him that night.  He had yearned for an opportunity to look upon her for many years since and now he could finally gaze upon her anytime he wanted.  It was like she was a part of him.  He never believed he could feel this way about a woman.

One woman is not like another, his brother had told him.  Aye, Keith had said that one day he would realize that, and he finally had.

The only thing was, now that he realized it, he could very well be losing her, and he knew no one could ever replace her. 

Back in Cameron’s room, Abby cried.  In addition to the horrible pain of the burns and scars, she felt bereft.  She needed Cameron.  What would she do without him?  He was her light. 

He was the light that dragged her out of her darkness. 

Would the doors of darkness open to her once again, drawing her anew into a life without meaning and feeling?