My Unexpected Family by Harlow James
Chapter 5
Chloe
“Who on earth could that be?” I traipse down the hallway toward the sound of the doorbell after leaving the shower I needed desperately after my morning dog walks. The heat has me sweating like a whore in church, even early in the morning, so a cold shower after my morning clients is entirely necessary. Add on the sprinkle of perspiration I’m sporting each time I throw up, and I basically look like a wet dog walking around most of the day right now.
When I open the door, anticipating seeing someone, I’m confused by the stack of boxes sitting on the doorstep instead.
“I didn’t order anything,” I mutter out loud, reaching for the top box and being relieved it’s not very heavy. I take it over to the kitchen counter and set it down, repeating the process for the next two boxes. I take a pair of scissors and puncture the tape on one, slicing through it and then ripping open the tabs. “What the hell?”
Bottles of prenatal vitamins are lined in rows, enough to medicate an army of pregnant women. The next box contains bags of ginger candies that apparently help fight nausea, and then the last one is large and lined with Styrofoam. I lift off the lid of the Styrofoam cooler and see bags of frozen buffalo wings lying inside.
“Wow.” I chuckle and then pick up my phone, pretty sure I know who this delivery is from.
Me: Apparently you can subscribe and save on Amazon for prenatal vitamins, ginger candy, AND buffalo wings.
Silas: Only the first two. The last one was a gift from a supplier who owed me a favor. Normally, I would recommend making your own buffalo wings from scratch since they’re healthier, but I know that requires time and energy that you probably don’t have right now.
Me: You’re right about that, Mister. But do you seriously think I need this many vitamins? I only take one a day.
Silas: Studies show that prenatal vitamins are beneficial to take after the baby is born as well, filling in on any loss of nutrients you experience before and after giving birth. Plus, they’re supposed to be great for your hair.
Me: Okay, Dr. Silas. Well, thank you, I guess.
Silas: You guess?
Me: I didn’t ask for this.
Silas: I know you didn’t, but I told you I would be here for you and the baby. And part of being a good dad is taking care of the baby’s mother as well.
Me: I know how to buy vitamins on my own, Silas.
Silas: I didn’t say you didn’t, Chloe.
Me: But I guess I should thank you for helping out with my buffalo wing bill. Wing Stop will be sad though to miss out on the profits they’ve been earning from me.
Silas: You’re welcome. And try the candies when you’re nauseous next time. A lot of women said they help.
Me: Did you call a pregnant lady hotline for that tip?
Silas: No. It’s called research, reading information online. You should try it. There’s a ton of knowledge out there about being a parent and navigating pregnancy, Chloe.
Me: I never knew that.
Silas: Why are you so sarcastic?
Me: It’s part of my charm. Thank you though. I’m going to go throw these wings in the air fryer and eat until I pass out and have to go back out for my evening shift of walks.
Silas: Enjoy, and take it easy, please. Talk to you later.
I drop the phone on my counter, just as there’s another knock on my door. My head is spinning with Silas’s display of responsibility and dare I say affection, but I barely have a second to process it.
“Miss Altman? How can I help you?” My neighbor stands with her arms crossed outside of my door as soon as I open it.
“I saw a bunch of boxes on your doorstep. Are you getting another roommate?’’ She speaks with detest in her voice. Miss Altman is the classic cranky neighbor that complains about everything, but also wants to be all up in your business.
“Oh, no. It was a delivery for me from…”
Do I tell her about Silas? About the screaming baby that will be here in roughly seven months that I’m sure she’ll be thrilled about since we share a wall?
“From?”
“A friend,” I reply, realizing that I don’t have to tell her shit about my life if I don’t want to, but also that I won’t be able to hide it soon enough and should probably take advantage of that detail as long as I can.
“Oh. Well, that was nice.” Her smile is anything but.
“Yes, it was. But I was just about to make some lunch, Miss Altman, so…”
“Oh, fine. Just, keep it down will you?”
“The only time I go down is on my knees. Bye, Miss Altman,” I say with a five-finger wave before closing the door in her face slacked with shock.
I laugh and then move into the kitchen, ready to binge on some buffalo wings courtesy of Silas De Luca. Is it sad that I’m more enthusiastic about the buffalo wings than anything else he delivered? And second of all, why did he do that? Does he not think I’m responsible enough to get my vitamins on my own? I was there at the doctor’s appointment. I heard what she said.
Chloe, the man was trying to do something nice for you. Don’t be a bitch about it.
Fine sub-conscience. You’re right. I should be grateful, at least, the man cares about me and his baby and I’m not doing this entirely on my own.
But then that reality hits me.
Alone.
I’ve always been alone, except for Shayla. I’ve never had someone looking out for me, except for her. And now, there’s this guy who’s concerned for my well-being.
It unnerves me, makes me feel anxious, makes me feel like I need to keep him at arm’s length because he will walk away one day.
They all do.
No one sticks around forever. And if there’s anything I’ve learned in my life about family, it’s that.
* * *“Seriously? Again, Sir Frances?” I watch the cocker spaniel squat and take yet another shit while I wait for him to finish. Luckily I had enough sense to take a walk today where there are plenty of opportunities to partake in shade, but right now I’m standing out in the blistering heat with the sun blaring down on me and my breakfast rolling around in my belly.
Once he finishes his business, he sits right down next to his turd as he watches me take a plastic bag out of the holder attached to his leash so I can pick up his mess.
“I hate the way you look at me while I do this, you know? I mean, normally we’re pals, man…but the way you look down on me while I pick up your shit makes me want to punch you in the face sometimes.” He darts his tongue out to lick his lips and then something catches his attention to his left, drawing his eyes in that direction. “Glad you feel bad about it.”
It’s been a week since Silas’s first delivery, and they haven’t stopped since then. I opened my door today to a box of pre-made smoothie cups that you store in the freezer until you want to make one. Apparently, I need to make sure to take in five servings of fruits and vegetables every day.
First of all, is there any self-respecting human on the planet that can honestly say they do that? And secondly, the idea of fruits and veggies makes me gag.
But, I wanted to try one since he went through the trouble and spent the money, even though I know money is no object for him. And now, as I lean down to pick up a rather large turd for such a small dog, I’m instantly regretting that decision.
When I stand up, dizziness assaults my senses, forcing me to reach out to grab the closest thing for stability, which just so happens to be a trash can. Clutching the leashes of the three dogs I have with me this morning, I brace myself for the vomit that I know is coming and wait for it. Within seconds, I’m upchucking my breakfast as the dogs sit by and watch me with curiosity.
When the heaves subside, I look down at the ground to make sure they’re still there, but that’s the last thing I remember before everything goes black.
* * *“Oh, thank God!” Shayla rips open the curtain surrounding the hospital bed I’m currently lying in as I blink to adjust to the fluorescent lights above me when her voice startles me awake.
“Shayla?” I try to sit up in bed, but she pushes me back down, which is probably a good thing since I’m instantly dizzy.
“No, don’t sit up.” She strokes my hair out of my face. “My God, Chloe. Are you okay?”
I look around the room, trying to remember how I got here. “I…I guess. What happened?”
“You don’t remember?”
“No.” I shake my head, and then a thought crosses my mind. “Is the baby…?” I blink as fear rushes through me. Did something happen to my baby? Is that why I passed out?
“Chloe,” Dr. Wilson says as she steps around Shayla and smiles down at me. “How are you feeling?”
“Discombobulated. Worried.” I take a deep breath and blow it out. “Doc, how did I get here?” I search the room as if the answers to the mystery will be written on the walls.
She clutches her clipboard to her chest. “A good samaritan on the street saw you pass out on the sidewalk and called 9-1-1. Luckily your head landed on one of the dogs you were walking when you fell. I mean, not lucky for the dog, but lucky for you.”
“Was it Sir Frances?” I ask, hoping that ironically I got my revenge for the four shits the little guy took today.
“I…I honestly don’t know.” She furrows her brow at me. “But, it was lucky you did and apparently the dog is fine.”
“And the baby?”
“The paramedics can only do so much without knowing that you’re pregnant, but your vitals look fine, although your blood pressure is a little higher than I’d like. But they called me as soon as you came into the hospital and I was waiting for you to wake up to get the whole story. Why don’t we check for a heartbeat now that you’re awake?”
“Yes, please. But how did you get here?” I turn to Shayla, wondering where she came from.
“Your sticker,” she says with amusement. “I rushed over from work once I got the call.”
I chuckle and smack my forehead. “Oh, right. I forgot about that.”
Years ago Shayla and I had a conversation about how she’s my in-case-of-emergency person, and vice versa, especially since I don’t have any other family. We talked about scenarios in which something might happen and the other person would need to be notified, so I came up with the idea of putting a sticker on the back of my driver’s license that said, ‘Call Shayla Mitchel in case of emergency. She’s my person,’ followed by her phone number. Luckily I had my wallet in my Finding Nemo over-the-shoulder purse I take with me on my walks. Shayla says the design of my bag is appropriate since I’m lost most of the time, and that movie is one of my favorites.
Fun fact about Chloe: Disney movies are my jam.
“Glad to know that preparation paid off,” I state proudly as another wave of nausea rolls through me.
“Are you ready?” Dr. Wilson holds the hand-held ultrasound monitor in her hands, staring down at me for confirmation. I give her a quick nod and then unbutton my shorts and fold the sides down as she squeezes cold gel onto my stomach.
“Shit, that’s cold!”
“You might as well get used to it. It’s going to be cold rather than warm most of the time,” she says with a wink as she presses the round tip of the wand to my abdomen, moving around to locate the baby.
And when that sweet sound of thumping comes out of the machine, I let out the biggest breath of relief. “Oh, thank God.” Shayla reciprocates the same sentiment.
“Chloe?” Silas rushes into the room this time, running over to my bed. His hair is a mess, his eyes are wide and bloodshot, and his black suit jacket breezes open from the force at which he’s running to me. He looks like a tall, dark, and handsome version of Superman—all he’s missing is the glasses.
He pauses and takes in the same sound I’m savoring right now, which causes his shoulders to visibly fall. “The baby’s okay?”
I nod, just as Dr. Wilson interjects. “The heartbeat sounds great. Strong. You got lucky. Sometimes a fall can be catastrophic.”
“You fell?” Silas asks as he makes his way closer to the bed, reaching for my arm. And the feel of his warm hand on my skin instantly calms me down—even though it shouldn’t.
I know we’re having this baby together, but deep in my gut I know Silas doesn’t want more than that, so it’s silly to get my hopes up when he shows affection like this. And more importantly, I should be questioning why my hopes are even climbing in the first place. What am I expecting to happen? For us to fall in love and end up with our own one-night-stand turned surprised baby turned happily ever after?
That shit doesn’t happen in real life.
“Apparently I passed out while walking dogs this morning.”
“Jesus Christ.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I told you to take it easy!”
“I was, but I have to work, Silas. It’s just the nausea, but it makes me so dizzy.”
“Have you been taking the medication I gave you?” Dr. Wilson chimes in.
“Yes, and eating ginger candies to help with feeling so sick. But I’m constantly dizzy and feeling weak,” I admit now that I can no longer hide it.
Dr. Wilson turns off the ultrasound, wiping the gel off of my stomach, before moving to grab the clipboard with my chart again. “Hmmm. Well, I hate to say this, but perhaps a few weeks of rest would do you some good.”
“Excuse me?”
“Bed rest, Chloe. You had quite the scare today and luckily, as I said, everything worked out fine. But walking as much as you do with the way you’re feeling might be aggravating your symptoms.”
“But Doc…”
“She can stay with me,” Silas declares as all three of us spin our heads in his direction.
“What? Silas, you can’t be serious.” I shake my head at him, but he continues to stare at Dr. Wilson.
“I’m gonna say limited activity for at least four weeks.”
“Four weeks?”
“That’s fine,” Silas adds.
“And she needs to be monitored for the next forty-eight hours.”
“I’ll work from home.”
I toss my head back and forth between Silas and the doctor before twisting to see Shayla grinning like the cat that got the canary. “Shayla?”
“Aw, I wish I could help, Chloe…but work is so crazy right now,” she says in an over-exaggerated tone. The little shit knows exactly what she’s doing. If I really needed her, she’d drop everything to be there for me, but it seems she has an ulterior motive.
“Really? That’s not what you said yesterday,” I challenge.
She glances over at Silas, who is now watching our conversation. “Well, things changed this morning.”
“It’s fine, Shayla. Chloe will be staying with me.”
“Do I even get a say in this?” I ask louder than necessary.
“No,” Shayla and Silas answer simultaneously.
Dr. Wilson widens her eyes as she fights to hide her smile. “Well then. That’s settled. There is another medication I’d like you to try to help with everything you’re feeling, and very limited activity for the next few weeks, okay? I’ll have the office call you to schedule a follow-up visit in a few days, just to make sure everything looks good still.”
“Thank you, Dr. Wilson.” Silas reaches out to shake her hand, and then she leaves the three of us alone. “I’ll have a moving company go to your apartment and pack your things today.” He reaches into his coat pocket for his phone and starts typing out a message.
“Wait, what? A moving company?”
“Yes. I think it’s just best that you move in with me at this point.”
“Silas…” Nothing. “Silas…” More silence. “Silas!” I shout, even though he continues to ignore me, which forces me to glance back at Shayla. “What the hell is going on here?”
“I believe you’re moving in with your baby’s daddy, Chloe.” She smirks and then rubs my shoulder.
“No, I’m not.”
“Yes, you are.” Silas finishes clicking a few buttons on his phone and then slides it back into his pocket. “There. It’s all taken care of.”
“How dare you!” I’m seething right now. “You just made a decision about my life without even consulting me!”
“Chloe, he’s trying to take care of you,” Shayla chimes in.
“No, he’s bulldozing me!”
“Chloe,” he says, reaching for my hand, rubbing his thumb along the top of it and peering down into my eyes with a fear radiating out from his chocolate brown orbs. And his stare—it instantly has me retracting as I wait for what he’s about to say. “You fainted on the street today, fell, and almost hit your head.”
“How do you know what happened?”
“Shayla called me right after the hospital called her.”
I turn to face her and shoot her an irritated look. “Thanks.”
“Hey, he had a right to know. You’re carrying his child,” she fires back.
“But you obviously aren’t resting and taking it as easy as you should, so I think it’s best if you come live with me.”
“Staying with you for a few weeks is one thing, Silas, but living together?”
“I’ve been thinking about it,” he says before standing up tall again. “And I think it’s the right decision. Once the baby comes, you’re going to need help and I don’t want to miss out on things. Even if we aren’t together, living together will allow us to raise the baby as a team and both be involved in the child’s life.”
I can sense another fear in his voice—his fear of losing the opportunity of seeing his child grow up. And it resonates with me because I feel the same way. I already know that in some fucked up way, this baby is a shot at a do-over for me, a chance to correct all of the mistakes my parents made with me. And maybe in some weird way, Silas views it similarly. How else could you explain why we are both so attached to something that neither of us truly wanted or envisioned in our lives?
Sighing in defeat, I take a moment to absorb what he’s saying. “Fine. I guess what you’re saying makes sense.”
“I think it’s a great idea,” Shayla adds, smiling like a buffoon again. When I get her alone, she’s getting a dead leg.
“Good. But even if you said no, I’d have moved your stuff without telling you,” Silas says, smirking down at me.
“I believe you. You can be quite controlling.”
“Not the worst attribute for him to have,” Shayla mumbles in my ear while leaning down to me in the bed.
Oh, I remember just how controlling and demanding Mr. Silas De Luca can be—in bed.
“But I’m not happy about this.” I point a finger up at him. “Don’t think I’ll just do whatever you want because I’m giving in to this.”
“Chloe, I know damn well that you will tell me exactly how you feel if something truly bothers you.”
He’s not wrong.
“Damn right.” I wince as another wave of nausea overtakes my stomach. “Fuck, isn’t this supposed to get better around week twelve or thirteen?”
“What?”
“The morning sickness?” I ask while holding my stomach.
“Generally speaking, yes. But some women will experience it throughout their entire pregnancy.”
I slowly turn to face the man responsible for how crummy I’m feeling. “You’d better be joking, Silas.”
“I’m not. Haven’t you been reading the articles I’ve been sending you?”
“Oh, the thirty links you send me in a day? No, sorry. I’ve been too busy puking, sleeping, and growing a human to read.”
Silas shakes his head at me and then glances over at Shayla. “How do you put up with her?”
“She’s actually quite easy to love,” she replies. “Like that dog at the pound that isn’t very cute, but is desperate for attention.”
“I don’t like pets.”
“Well, you just took in a stray that will sink her claws into your heart, Silas.” She winks at me and then pats him on the shoulder. “Good luck.”
* * *“This is seriously happening.”
“Yes, and I think it’s the correct decision,” Shayla says on the other end of the phone.
“Oh, don’t think I didn’t catch your glee when you heard him declare I was moving in with him.”
“I’m not going to lie, I’m curious to see what happens between the two of you. But I also think he’s right—it’s going to be so much easier if you’re living in the same house. Did you even think about that? What it would have been like being in that apartment by yourself in the middle of the night with the baby screaming and no one to offer to take turns?”
“All I kept thinking about was how much it was going to irritate Miss Altman,” I snicker.
Shayla chuckles as well. “That broad will have a new neighbor to annoy her now, and someone else’s life to butt into. Seriously, Chloe…I think this will be good.”
“Of course you do, but you don’t understand. You were the only person I’ve ever lived with, and I had just started getting used to living alone. Now I have to live with a man.”
“A handsome one at that,” she teases.
“Don’t remind me. Although, given how crappy I’ve been feeling, sex has been the furthest thing from my mind, which really tells you how sick I’ve been. You know me, I’m always down for some dick.”
“That will change. And who knows, maybe Silas will fulfill his fatherly duties in that aspect as well.”
I roll my eyes. “He barely slept with me in the first place. It took several shots of tequila for him to admit that he wanted me. And I’m sure once I blow up like a whale, the tequila won’t even help convince him to go another round.”
“Chloe, you are a gorgeous woman, and contrary to what you might think or what he’s told you, Silas cares about you. Look at how present he’s been so far.”
“Yeah, for his baby. Out of obligation, Shayla. Not because he wants me.”
“Yeah… I’m calling bullshit. He does, he just doesn’t want to admit it yet.”
“But that’s besides the fact that crossing that line is only going to complicate this arrangement even more. I just need to accept that we had the hottest sex of my life, made a baby, and are now bound together for all eternity by said baby. There will be no romance here.” Even as I say the words, disappointment builds in my chest.
“But…”
“And you need to accept it too, alright? Don’t instigate any more instances that you think will bring us together,” I mock her in her voice.
“I didn’t!”
“Oh, yes you did. I heard the underlying tone of your voice when you said you were too busy to look after me. Like I need a fucking baby sitter,” I mutter. “You know damn well if I needed you that badly, you’d be there.”
She sighs. “I know. I guess I’m just hoping that you two will figure your shit out and see that you belong together,” she says exasperatedly. “Don’t you remember when you asked me where your billionaire was when I started seeing Wes?”
“Yes…”
“He’s right there, Chloe. He’s in that house you’re parked in front of. And I’m not just saying that because he’s Wes’s friend, or the father of your baby. I could see it that first night in Vegas. There’s a spark between you two.”
“He did light up my clit,” I agree.
She laughs. “He did. So yes, the circumstances surrounding your relationship are out of order, but I truly think this was all part of some master plan by God to make you both see that the person you’ve been searching for is each other.”
I huff out an annoyed sigh. “Shayla…not everyone is meant to have the happily ever after, the white picket fence…”
“I know you don’t think you deserve that, Chloe, given how you grew up. But like you’ve already accepted, maybe this is your shot at a somewhat normal life.”
“Nothing about this is normal. I’m a dog walker who fucked a restaurant CEO, and just so happened to get pregnant.”
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about falling in love in general. All the rest of it is just the details.”
I shake my head while glancing in the rearview mirror as I see the moving truck pull in behind me. “Falling in love has made you way too sappy. Where’s my edgy best friend? Where’s the girl that told me she’d never need a man to make her happy?”
“I found a man that brought happiness to my life, a man I wanted rather than needed. And I can’t help but feel that Silas could be both of those men for you.”
“Damn. That’s deep, friend.”
I can hear her laugh. “You’d better go. Get settled. I’ll stop by this weekend to check on you and help you unpack if you need me.”
“Okay, okay. I hope Silas knows what he got himself into telling me to move in.”
“I’m sure he has no fucking clue. But Wes did warn me, he’s a bit of a neat freak, so try not to be too messy.”
“Ugh. This is going to be interesting.”
“Yes, it is. Love you, Chloe. Now go rest and grow my niece or nephew.”
“I’m trying, but this kid is sucking the life out of me.”
“I heard that’s what children do.”
We end our call as I open my car door and step out to survey the street and homes around me. This neighborhood is beautiful and quaint, the perfect place to raise a kid. Maybe Silas’s heart is in the right place and this will work out swimmingly.
“Here goes nothing.” I gently pat my stomach as I speak to my unborn child that is successfully prospering given my fall just yesterday. “Mommy and Daddy are about to live together and I have no idea what is going to happen.”
It’s the day after my sidewalk episode. Silas asked me to pack or direct the movers to pack this morning, and then meet him at his house this afternoon. He offered to pick me up, but I argued that I would need my car, so he allowed me to drive myself, like I need his fucking permission. Still, the fact that he offered is sweet, but I’m sure as hell not going to tell him that.
So I hopped in my car for the last time for who knows how long, leading the moving van full of every last one of my belongings to his house. The crew put my world in boxes faster than I could sing the hokey pokey, and by the time I turned myself around, my apartment—the only place I’ve ever called home since I moved to Santa Barbara at eighteen with Shayla—was empty.
Lifting my purse higher on my shoulder, I lock my car that I pulled into the driveway of Silas’s house, and make my way up to the front door.
And this home—it’s everything I love about the houses in Santa Barbara, a mix of Spanish architecture and modern flare. The tan stucco of the house looks stunning against the bright blue of the sky and the hot pink flowers growing on a vine that is climbing the walls of the house. A short wrought iron fence surrounds a closed-in yard in the front, but continues around the back of the house, only doubled in height. Picturesque windows overlook the quiet street, granting me a glimpse inside his home as I walk through the small gate and up to the massive wooden door with iron bars across the small window at the top.
“Chloe.” Silas opens the door to greet me before I can raise my hand to knock, and the sight of him in casual clothes about unhinges my jaw.
I’ve only really seen Silas in a suit, or the few days in Aruba where he was hanging out in plain t-shirts and chino shorts. But right now, this fine piece of Italian man is wearing a white tank top that is open almost all the way down on the sides, and red mesh shorts that highlight the dick that got us into this mess in the first place. A peek through the side of his shirt grants me the vision of his trimmed chest hair and an eight-pack of abs, glistening in the sweat that is also trailing down his forehead. I instantly want to clean him with my tongue and then dirty him up again.
Guess my sex drive isn’t completely dead.
“Sorry. I just got off the treadmill. I wanted to get my workout done before you arrived.”
“No biggie. I’m glad I didn’t miss the show,” I say as I step through the threshold of his house.
“Show?”
“You. Sweaty. Gym clothes.” I wave my hand up and down his body. “It’s definitely catching my attention.”
He huffs and rolls his eyes, then turns, walking further into the house, forcing me to follow him. “Well, welcome. I have some buffalo wings in the oven for you since it’s close to dinner time and I figured you’d be hungry. I need to take a shower, obviously, but then I can show you around.”
The doorbell rings before I can reply.
“Oh, right. The movers.” Silas runs to open the door again to let them in. “Thanks guys. The bed and dresser can go in the last room on the right of the hallway. The other boxes can go in the room before that.” He turns to me. “That way you can unpack as you need to and won’t have to step around boxes in your room.”
“Okay. That sounds good.” I look around the house, up to the mountainous ceilings and over to the open concept kitchen. There are two hallways, one on each side of the house, a staircase that leads to the second story, and it looks like two living rooms. Out the back slider, I can see a sensational backyard and swimming pool and a small structure that could be a garage. “How many rooms are in this house?”
“Eight.”
“For just you?”
He looks around sheepishly. “Yeah. I just…really liked the house.” For someone who said he avoided relationships, why would he buy such an enormous house that you could raise a gaggle of kids in?
The movers start bringing in my furniture and boxes, and I grow uneasy watching the physical extent of my life being moved around before me. “I…I need some fresh air.” Moving toward the back yard, I reach for the sliding glass door and pull it open, relishing in the cool ocean breeze hitting me the second I break free from the house.
“You okay?” Silas asks as he comes up behind me.
I stare off into the distance, admiring the view of the ocean from his yard. His house sits on a hill like Wes’s, offering breathtaking views of Santa Barbara below and beyond. The sun is falling rapidly in the sky, lighting up our surroundings in an orange and yellow haze. Just being out here is helping to calm me, but the reality is, I’m knee-deep in a lot of change right now and I’m having a hard time processing it all.
“I’m fine.”
“I have three sisters and a grandmother, so I’m pretty sure that when a woman says they’re fine, they’re not really.”
“This is just a lot, Silas.”
He sighs and then reaches out to put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his side. The move takes me by surprise, but also makes me feel safe—a feeling that is both welcoming and dangerous.
“I feel the same way, Chloe. Pretty sure neither of us imagined our night in Aruba would transpire to this. But here we are, and I’m not the type of person to run from my mistakes or choices, not that our baby is a mistake,” he speaks quickly and then turns to face me. “I’m sorry, I don’t want you to think our child is a mistake…that’s not what I meant.”
“I get it. It’s okay.”
“I just meant that I’m all in. That’s how I do everything in my life. And I want you to understand that I needed you here to keep me from worrying so much.” His eyes bounce back and forth between mine.
“You’re worried?”
“I’m fucking terrified,” he whispers, bending his knees slightly so his eyes are on the same level as mine. I’m not a short woman, but Silas is a tall and massive man.
Christ, don’t remind me of all the ways he is massive, sub-conscience.
“Of what?”
He’s silent for a moment, but then his brow furrows and he licks his lips, the smallest dart of his tongue that has my eyes tracking the movement. “So much. Too much to explain right now, Chloe. Just…try to relax now that you’re here, okay? Let me care for you. I need to care for you.”
Need? He needs to care for me? Why does that word coming from his mouth have me melting and questioning him at the same time? I never imagined Silas De Luca being this protective, alpha-type man, but I can say I’m definitely not hating it, which is a dangerous notion in itself.
I roll my eyes to try to lighten the mood because this conversation is growing intense along with my hunger. “Fine. I guess. It might be fun to have you wait on me for a few days. Are you gonna wear one of those French maid outfits?”
It’s his turn to roll his eyes now as he stands up to full height again. “Uh, no.”
I shake my head. “French maid outfit or no deal, Silas.” Crossing my arms over my chest, I do my best to enhance my cleavage, which does the trick I wanted. Silas’s eyes veer down to my breasts that physically ache right now as I touch them, but it’s worth it to see him ogle me. “Or we could get you a man thong in black silk, with the white frilly edges. It’s not the apron, but I actually think I’d prefer that compromise right now.”
“You’re out of your goddamn mind, Chloe Pierce.” He turns away from me and beelines for the house. “I need a shower. Wings should be done now,” he says over his shoulder.
“Aw, come on, Silas. You said you wanted to take care of me. Well, you’re feeding my actual appetite, but my sexual appetite still needs to be appeased as well.”
Continuing to shake his head, he slips through the sliding glass door, leaving me all alone like I initially wanted, but I can’t help but take pride in making the man nervous. I take a seat on one of the loungers around the pool and get as comfortable as I can. My abdomen is tender and my boobs are throbbing. My body is changing—I can feel it. It may not be visible to anyone else, but internally I know what’s happening.
But on the outside, everything is changing too, and it’s all a little overwhelming to say the least.
“What are you doing to me, little bean?” I trace circles around my belly button once I lift my shirt. For a second I imagine him or her floating around in there, doing karate moves or possibly napping, completely unaware of everything life is about to throw at them the second they take their first breath.
I think back to my childhood, to the world I was subjected to—drugs, lack of basic necessities, and then bouncing around from home to home once my parents died. No matter what happens, I will never let that be the life my child experiences. And judging by how seriously Silas is taking this, I bet he has his own reasons for wanting to protect our baby too.
* * *“Wow. You happy now?” Silas walks into the living room after his shower to find me sitting cross-legged on the couch with an empty plate on my lap while I lick my fingers free of buffalo sauce.
“Extremely.” I pop my pinky finger out of my mouth and then set my plate on the coffee table before lifting my eyes to take in the freshly clean man. His dark wet hair is slicked back on his head, much like the way he styles it normally, and his light grey shirt and black shorts cling to the solid body I know is hiding underneath.
“This is a beautiful table by the way,” I say as I gesture to the coffee table centered between the couch and a few large, cushioned chairs, attempting to push the inappropriate thoughts from my mind.
“Oh. Thank you.”
“It’s so unique. The marble on the top and the grain of the wood.”
“It’s an original piece.”
“Where’d you get it from?” I ask as Silas twists away from me.
“A place close by,” he replies curtly, causing me to second guess my line of questions. I was just trying to offer him a compliment on his furniture, but apparently small talk is asking too much from him right now.
I swallow hard, suddenly parched and in need of washing my hands, so I brace myself to stand up. But when I do, I lose my balance and almost fall over.
“Woah there.” Silas reaches out for me, steadying me before I hit the ground. “You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just the damn dizziness.”
“Well, this is exactly why you’re supposed to be on bed rest. Did you take your new medication?”
“It’s not filled yet. And the doctor said limited activity, not to tie me down to a bed.”
“Pretty sure she said bed rest,” he argues with a lift of his brow, and I wonder if he’s envisioning strapping me down to his mattress too. “And I can pick up your pills for you tomorrow.”
“Whatever. I need to wash my hands.” I begin to walk, but Silas holds my arm and follows me. “I don’t need you to baby me.”
“I’m not. I’m making sure you make it there and back.”
“Whatever. If it makes you feel better.” Silas releases me once we get to the sink, and I pump the soap in my hands, lathering them up while I wait for the water to heat up. “So what are your plans for the rest of the night?”
“Well, I usually read or answer emails right about now, then spend an hour or two in my shop.”
“Is that what that building is in the back?” I gesture over my shoulder with my thumb.
“Yup.”
“What do you do out there?”
“Just…stuff.”
I eye him from the side as I rinse my hands. “Wow. How boring.”
“I believe we already established I’m not much for fun.”
“You’re solidifying that fact in record time.” I reach for a towel and dry my hands as Silas watches me. “Got anything sweet? All of a sudden I need some sugar.”
He narrows his eyes at me and then smiles, which catches me off-guard, but then moves to his walk-in pantry. The man is so tall he has to duck to fit inside, but when he emerges, he’s holding a rather large container of sour gummy worms.
“Sour gummy worms?”
“I’m going to let you in on something right now, Chloe. I love sour candy—licorice, worms, belts—I love it all, and I’ve never had to share my stash with anyone.”
“Your stash?” I can’t help the lift of my lips as this man grows serious while talking about sour candy.
“Yup. My stash. But, seeing as how you’re the mother of my child, that grants you certain access to accommodations around here.”
The man is speaking as if he’s about to deal me drugs and I need to sign my agreement with him in blood. “Silas, you’re…kinda scaring me.”
“I’m serious about my sour candy, Chloe.” He lifts the lid off the jar and holds it out to me so I can reach inside and grab a few pieces. I swear, he takes a mental tally of how many worms I take and then secures the lid.
His eyes dart to my mouth as I pop one inside, and then I let out an embarrassing moan. “Good God, these are good.”
His triumphant smirk has my thighs clenching together. “These are the best gummy worms in the world. A local shop here in town makes them, and they specifically fulfill an order just for me on a weekly basis.”
“I guess money does get you the good drugs.”
He laughs. “That it does. But I’m warning you, don’t eat all of my candy or we will have a problem. It’s the only roommate rule I ask you to honor.”
I hold up two fingers like a boy scout. “I will try my hardest. Although now you’ve let me taste them and that was your first mistake.”
After a few more moments of small talk, I let out a big yawn. “I guess my body is done for today.”
“Come on. Let’s get you settled then.” He leads me back to my room that I haven’t even seen yet, opening the door and letting me enter first. And the room is stunning.
My bed has been made—not sure when that happened—and my dresser sits up against the wall next to the door. The last bit of daylight as the night claims the sky comes through a bay window with a built in bench underneath it, the perfect little reading spot, even though I’m not much of a reader. There are fresh flowers on the nightstand, and an en-suite bathroom rests beyond one of the open doors, the other leading to a walk-in closet.
“I hope you’ll be comfortable here.”
“Are you kidding? This room is bigger than my apartment,” I say as I turn to face him. He’s leaning against the door jamb, watching me take in my new living arrangements.
“I figured. And there is plenty of space for a bassinet in the corner.” He points to the spot he’s describing. “But the baby’s room can be next door where your boxes are, that way you’re close.”
“Where’s your room?”
“Upstairs, right above yours. It basically covers the entire span of the top floor on this side of the house.”
“Oh, okay.”
“Is that alright?”
“Yeah. I was just…curious.” Suddenly knowing Silas is sleeping above me is making me wish he were hovering above me in other ways. Looks like I’m busting out the vibrator tonight.
“Alright. Well, I’ll see you in the morning. I’m taking the next two days off to look over you as I promised the doctor, and we have your check up Friday morning. By the time the weekend is over, you should be okay to be alone.”
“I still can’t believe this.” I shake my head and stare back out the window at the quiet street I now live on. But Silas comes up behind me, resting his hand on my shoulder and startling me at the same time, the warmth of his touch making my eyes close responsively once the shock of the moment subsides.
It’s been months since we had sex, but every time he touches me, all it makes me do is relive that night—the command he had over my body, how he made me feel safe enough to give him control. And maybe that can be true in this new path of our lives as well. Will I be able to trust him to not leave me and this baby behind?
He’s doing all the right things, showing me that he’s committed to being a parent alongside me, but what happens if he meets someone that he can actually see himself in a relationship with? I know he said he doesn’t partake in relationships, but surely that could change if the right woman came along, right? Would I have to listen to them screw in the bed above me? Or welcome her into being a part of our child’s life? Would I move out at that point?
“I know. But it’s for the best. This is going to be a wild ride, Chloe, but I think we can handle it.” Silas soothes the skin on my shoulder while my heart races violently, thinking about all of the what ifs.
Spinning to face him, I’m surprised by the warmth in his eyes, the way he stands strong in his words. And just seeing that resolve in him takes away a splinter of the doubt residing in my mind. “Thank you, Silas. For everything. I don’t think I’ve told you that yet.”
He squeezes my shoulder. “You’re welcome, Chloe. This is the start of the rest of our lives. Everything is changing, but we can tackle it together if you let us.”
“I’m trying.”
“By the way, I got you something.” His legs lead him over to the nightstand by my bed, where he picks up a rather thick book.
“What to Expect When You’re Expecting,” I mutter out loud. “What is this?”
“What does it look like? A book about pregnancy and giving birth.”
“That’s a big book.”
“Well, there’s a lot to know. I figure with all of the time you’ll have, you can read this and be more prepared for what’s to come.”
“Yeah, I guess,” I say reluctantly. It’s not that I don’t think I should read it. It’s that reading it makes this all too real. And I’m not naïve. I know this is real, that this baby is coming sooner rather than later. But something is still holding me back from letting my brain catch up to my heart.
Maybe it’s how you’re feeling about your baby’s daddy.
“Alright. Well, good night, Chloe.”
“Goodnight, Silas.”
I watch him retreat from my room and shut the door behind him. After a nice warm shower, I put on loose, silky pajamas and then climb into bed.
“What the ever-loving dream cloud is this? This isn’t my mattress,” I groan as I sink into the feathery goodness beneath me. As if he couldn’t make me swoon even harder, the man bought me a new mattress and had my bed made without my knowledge, probably because he knew I would fight him on it.
And I will. Tomorrow. Because right now, my body is being a treacherous bitch and loving every second of bliss coming from the surface I’m lying on, causing me to drift off into an exquisite sleep where my baby daddy does wicked things to my body with his body that I now have to stare at on a daily basis.