The Destruction You Desire by Tracy Lorraine
Peyton
The sound of Leon's cell cuts through Kayden's sweet voice as he continues to talk his new brother's ear off.
I didn't expect Leon to hang around long but his eyes lit up when Aunt Fee offered to feed him and well… he's still here. From the wide smile on Kayden's face, I'd say Leon's extended visit has made his year.
"Sorry, lil’ man. I need to get this."
Standing, Leon pulls his cell from his pocket and looks at the screen before shooting a concerned glance at me.
My heart rate picks up at the concern on his face
"Yeah?" he asks as I sit forward on the couch. "Yeah, okay. I'll come get him now. Later, Bry."
Bry?
Leon hangs up and closes his eyes for a beat.
"I'm sorry but I need to head out," he says, dropping down to his haunches in front of Kayden. "But I'll come and hang out with you again soon, yeah?"
Disappointment darkens Kayden's eyes but he keeps a smile on his face.
"Y-yeah."
"Good boy." Leon winks at him and ruffles up his hair before walking over to me.
"What's going on?" I whisper.
"Luca is wasted at The Locker Room and they're about to open. I need to go and get him."
"Jesus Christ."
"What are you doing?" he asks when I shove my cell into my back pocket and grab my jacket off the back of the couch.
"Coming with you."
"No, Peyton. You don't need to, not after—"
"I'm coming."
He holds his hands up in defeat and waits for me to tell Aunt Fee where we're going.
"You two really need to talk," Leon says once we're on our way across town.
"Yeah, I know. It's just easier said than done."
"Well, you need to try harder because at this rate, Luca's not going to have much left to salvage. He came in the other night stinking of weed. If Coach finds out then—"
"I know, Lee. I know."
He glances over at me but whatever words were on the tip of his tongue die the second his eyes lock with mine.
"I'm on your side here, Peyton. But I'm worried about him."
"Same. I'm worried about both of you. You might have been wearing a smile all afternoon, Lee, but don't think I can't see beneath that," I confess, referencing the dark clouds that have been in his eyes ever since my confession earlier.
"I'm fine. It was just a shock."
"Sure," I agree, knowing that he's not going to want to talk to me about whatever it is. It's not like we've ever been close. "But if you ever need to talk or whatever, I'm here. Okay. I'm not—I wasn't—just Luc's friend."
"I don't think that's a good idea. As far as he's concerned, we've already spent too much time together."
"Well, he can go fuck himself. We're allowed to be friends. What happened with Letty, it's not going to happen here."
"Not into the twin thing, huh?" he deadpans.
"Lee," I breathe.
"Sorry. It's just easier to joke sometimes, you know?"
"I do," I whisper as he pulls into the parking lot for The Locker Room.
"Ready to go and see what state your boy is in?"
His words make my chest ache. He's not mine anymore.
With a loud sigh, the two of us climb out of Leon's car and head toward the main door which security opens for us.
"Where is he?" Leon asks the second Bry looks up from his place behind the bar.
Bry nods to the back corner and when I turn around, all I can see is a pair of feet sticking out into the walkway between the booths.
"Fucking hell. We'll get him out of your way."
I march over with Leon hot on my tail.
We find Luca passed out on the bench seat and still holding an empty bottle of whisky.
"You two really need to hash this out. He can't keep this shit up," Leon mutters, plucking the bottle from his brother's hand before pulling him so he's sitting up.
"Luca, asshole," he shouts, slapping his face with a little more force than probably necessary. "Luca, wake the fuck up. I ain't carrying your drunk ass all the way to the car."
Luca groans, his head rolling and his eyes remaining tightly shut.
"Grab an arm, I’ll get the other. It's not that far."
Leon looks at me with wide eyes. "What? I'm stronger than I look."
"If you say so," he mutters, pulling hard on Luca's arm until his ass leaves the bench and lifts him into his body.
Wrapping his arm around my shoulder, we set about maneuvering him toward the exit and into Leon's car.
"If you puke in here, you're paying for a full detail," Leon barks before closing the door on Luca.
He groans in response and that's the last we hear of him all the way home.
The second we have him inside the house, one of their friends that I recognize emerges and thankfully takes my place. I might be strong and able to move Kayden around with little effort, but Luca is another story.
I lead the way, opening his bedroom door so the guys can unceremoniously dump Luca onto his bed.
"Come on, P. I'll take you home."
I stare at Luca passed out and then back at Leon who's standing in the doorway.
He must be able to read my mind because his brows pull together and he shakes his head.
"No, Peyton. He doesn't deserve it."
"I-I know but—"
"You should leave him to suffer after the way he's treated you."
"I know what I should do, Leon," I snap, irritated by his judgmental tone. "But things aren't always that simple."
His brow lifts. "You really want to do this? Fine, be my guest but don't come crying to me when he kicks your ass to the curb again."
"It won't come to that, Lee. I'm just gonna make sure he doesn't choke on his own puke." Just like he did for me last night.
As vicious and evil as he's been to me, I still desperately want to believe that there's a good person under all that hate and frustration at the world.
Leon leaves, slamming the door behind him to ensure I know how he feels about my decision to stay.
I understand why he's pissed at me.
Hell, I know I'm crazy. But I can't help it.
I just can't walk away right now and leave him in that state. I'd rather stay and make sure he's okay than lie in bed at home worrying about him.
I know I shouldn't worry, but it's Luca. No matter how wicked he is, no matter what he says to me, what he accuses me of, he'll always be under my skin.
With a sigh, I walk toward his bed and lower down beside his feet that are sticking off the end of the mattress.
I pull his sneakers off, then his socks and with all my strength, I manage to roll him over.
"You don't make this easy, do you, Dunn?" I pant out as I try to straighten him up.
Popping the button on his jeans, I wrap my fingers around the waist and attempt to pull them down over his hips. Only, I don't get very far because the second I clear his ass, his hand shoots out and wraps around my wrist.
My heart jumps into my throat in shock.
"Shit, Luc. I—"
When I look up, he's staring right at me.
The mask I've been used to staring at during the past few weeks is gone. He looks just like he did the other night when he came to The Locker Room after seeing his dad.
Exhausted. Lost. Utterly broken.
He blinks as silent seconds pass. His fingers retain their tight grip on me, and I start to think that he's still asleep and has no idea what he's doing. But then he lifts his arm and tugs so hard that I have no choice but to fall into the bed and on top of him.
Before I have a chance to scramble off him, he rolls onto his side, taking me with him and locking his arm around my waist.
His nose nuzzles into my neck causing fire to shoot through my veins and goose bumps to prick my skin.
Damn it, body.
"Don't leave me, Peyton. Please. I-I need you."
The vulnerability in his voice makes my breath catch.
"Please," he whispers, making a shudder race down my spine.
Squeezing my eyes closed, I fight back any kind of reassurance that wants to fall from my lips. He doesn't deserve to hear those words from me, he doesn't deserve to hear that I'm here for him, that I'll support him in any way through whatever it is he's going through right now.
Having said that though, as I lie there in his arms and surrounded by his, albeit whisky-infused scent, I find my body getting heavy with my own exhaustion.
I tell myself I'll just give it ten minutes, let him fall back into a heavy sleep once more and then I'll slip out confident that he's okay. I can call an Uber and get home to do work on my assignment.
I awake with a start sometime later and attempt to sit up but the deadweight of Luca still pins me to the bed. Forcing my eyes open, I find the room in total darkness, my brows pull together, knowing that there was a light on when I fell onto the bed.
Not allowing myself to dwell on it, I twist around to look at Luca.
He's fast asleep, his dark lashes resting down on his cheekbones, his full lips parted and the lower half of his face covered in weeks worth of scruff, hiding what I know is a square jaw beneath.
His brow is furrowed even in his sleep, showing just how tormented he is with everything in his life right now.
Knowing I need to leave before he wakes up, I slip out from under his heavy arm and tiptoe across the room.
It's not until I'm at the door that he moves. I freeze, holding my breath as he rolls onto his front but thankfully, he doesn't wake up.
I manage to get out of the house unnoticed, ordering an Uber as I do so. I only loiter on the sidewalk for a couple of minutes before a car pulls up to take me home.
It's long past midnight when I let myself back into Aunt Fee's house. It's dark, so the last thing I expect when I step into the kitchen is for someone to speak.
"Bit early for the walk of shame, isn't it?"
My heart thunders in my chest as I turn to the dark figure leaning against the counter.
Slamming my hand on the switch, I turn the light on.
"Jesus, Elijah. What the hell?"
"Sorry," he mutters, lifting a glass to his lips.
"Well, it's good to see you're still alive," I scoff, pulling the refrigerator open.
"Could say the same thing about you."
"Yeah, how'd that 'I'll keep you safe' thing work out for you?"
"A blonde happened," he confesses with a shrug. Although to be safe, he does look a little regretful.
"Yeah, I saw. Everything you hoped she'd be?"
"You have no idea. Listen though," he says somewhat nervously, lifting his hand to the back of his neck. "I'm sorry I bailed on you. Mom ripped me a new one when I got back."
"It's fine, E. I don't need a babysitter."
"What happened with Luca?"
I sigh, mimicking his stance at the opposite counter. "I dunno. He's a mess. I got trashed. He took me home, took care of me… kind of."
"Mom said Leon came to meet Kayden."
I can't help the smile that curls at my lips as the memory of the two of them playing this afternoon fills my mind along with Kayden's smiling face.
"Yeah. I'm pretty sure it was the best day of Kayden's life."
"How'd Leon take the news? I'm assuming good, seeing as he spent most of the afternoon here."
"Yeah," I murmur. "I'm not entirely sure. I mean, he believed me, so that's a start. I guess only time will tell." I think of the darkness that surrounded him as I explained what his dad had been doing and concern races through me.
I've experienced Luca's darkness before, hell, I'm living it right now. But there was something about Leon in those few moments that was absolutely terrifying.
