Knocking on Helen’s Door by Eve Langlais
15
Married.A concept Helen had only ever read about. Because angels didn’t do that. They didn’t marry or have friendships. Angels didn’t do so many things.
Angels most certainly never let the devil convince them to let him preside over a ceremony that bound her to Julio, making him her husband. As his wife, she became a de facto citizen of Hell.
She’d have laughed if she could have overcome her shock.
“Congratulations, you may kiss the bride,” the devil said with a wink.
Julio might have been gruff when he said, “I do,” but his kiss was soft.
The pounding on the door was hard.
“Good luck, newlyweds,” the devil interrupted. “Gotta go. Can’t be seen on Earth meddling.”
Lucifer left as the door was kicked open and angels spilled in, led by one she recognized. The male angel who’d started this fiasco.
The angel pointed with his sword. “Surrender.”
Julio shifted until Helen was shielded by his body, the edge of his cloak whispering over her. “She’s not going anywhere with you, asshole.”
“Stand aside, reaper. This is Heaven’s business. We have a warrant for her arrest.”
Julio shook his head. “Guess again. You and your band of feathery sycophants have no authority over a denizen of Hell.”
“She’s not been judged fallen. Not yet,” the angel snapped. “Until she is, move aside, or I will—”
“What, fathead? What do you think you’ll do, exactly?” Julio’s cloak had turned into a tumultuous, roiling storm of shadow. He loomed, giving the impression of massive size.
The angel sneered. “You would defy Heaven’s emissary?” The guy lifted his hand and curled his fingers. “Cut the reaper down and take the woman.”
“Touch my wife and you’ll die.” Julio uttered the statement as a solemn promise.
“She married you?” Disbelief followed by disdain. “You lie.”
“I assure you, we are married.”
She still couldn’t believe it. Maybe if they’d had time for another kiss…
“Doesn’t matter if you’re married. She is under arrest.”
“Actually, Theodore, it does matter.” A woman suddenly appeared in a fog of dark blue that settled into a business suit. She wore a severe expression as she faced down the angel. “Hello, I’m Kourtney, Grim Dating’s legal counsel, here to explain why you cannot lay a hand on the new Mrs. Julio Reaper. You are hereby being reminded that Mrs. Reaper, as a result of her binding marriage to Julio Reaper, is now a citizen of Hell with all the rights and protections afforded that stature.”
“So what if she married a reaper?” Theodore sneered. “You do realize it’s just more proof she deserves arrest and punishment. The rules are clear. Angels may not consort with minions of Hell.”
“A fallen angel can,” Kourtney pointed out.
“Only she never stood trial and was never cast out,” Theodore argued. “She broke our laws before the marriage. She will be tried for her crimes. It could be that instead of being cast down she is allowed to do penance.”
Kourtney didn’t back down. “You want her, then you’ll have to file an extradition request.”
“Or I can just take her now,” Theodore threatened, taking a step forward.
Kourtney shook her head. “You really don’t want to do that. There are rules you have to follow. Part of the treaty between Heaven and Hell signed after the hundred-year war. It says you can’t take a citizen of Hell without going through the proper channels.”
Theodore bristled with rage and raised his sword. “I don’t listen to demons.”
“Oh, you really don’t want to do that,” Julio admonished.
From nowhere a shadowy shape appeared and spread at Kourtney’s back. From it a voice boomed, “You would threaten my woman?”
Theodore glared at the newly arrived reaper. “This is Heaven’s business.”
“You don’t want to fuck with me.”
The reaper loomed, and Kourtney turned a smile on the spreading shadow and said, “Thanks, but I got this, Dwayne.”
“Just making sure he realizes he can’t threaten you.”
Dwayne settled down, and Kourtney turned back to Theodore just as he said, “No one will be harmed if you stand aside.”
“You want Helen, then you will abide by the contract. Any move on your part to take her by force will constitute a violation, and I will file a formal complaint.”
“We should report this to Michael and see what he wants to do,” said an angel at Theodore’s back.
“I am not leaving without her.” Theodore just wouldn’t give up.
It was then Helen got brave and stepped forward. “If you’re so worried about the rules, then why don’t we talk about the fact you’ve been breaking them. I saw you fornicating with a nanny in Heaven.”
Theodore’s jaw tightened. “Stop with the lies.”
“Lies?” she huffed. “I’m not the one who has a problem with the truth. I know you’re a sinner. I’ve seen your son here on Earth. I know that Heaven is the one who has been lying. Our Father is not our Father in Heaven. We are made on Earth. We are half human.”
At her words, the angels shifted, and Theodore’s face darkened. “Blasphemy.”
“It’s the truth. And you want me so you can silence me before I tell anyone,” she accused.
As Theodore’s companions shifted away from him, he snarled, “This isn’t over. I’ll be back.” A definite threat, and yet he and his squad left the apartment without arresting her, which she considered a victory.
Kourtney appeared somber. “He’ll return, and soon, with Heaven’s lawyer in tow. I recommend you be gone before then.”
“Why? I thought they couldn’t arrest me because we are married.” She glanced at Julio, who appeared just as confused.
Kourtney’s lips flattened. “Yes and no. The problem is there is a very hard rule about angels getting married to reapers. Actually, according to the quick search I did on angelic laws, your kind can’t get married to anyone. Add in the non-association-with-Hell rule and we could be arguing this case in the neutral courts for a long time.”
“I thought you said I was fallen?” An idea that didn’t frighten her like it once did. Not after all she’d seen.
“Not technically. Theodore is correct in that you have to stand trial and be formally cast down.”
“But I sinned.”
Kourtney shrugged. “I don’t make the laws, just argue for or against them.”
“What are we supposed to do?” Julio asked. “I won’t let them take her.” Did he even notice how his cloak had reached out to wrap around her, keeping her warm when inside she felt chilled?
“Theodore isn’t an angel who will accept defeat. Look at the lengths he’s already gone to cover his misdeeds.”
“What do you suggest then? If he won’t stop chasing me, then does that mean I should turn myself in?” Helen didn’t want to, and yet it seemed she didn’t have a choice.
“I wouldn’t.” Kourtney shrugged, a roiling cloud of blue that merged with the black cloak still looming at her back. “Seems to me that’d ensure a certain death. The best thing I can suggest is to go somewhere Theodore can’t reach you. Somewhere to give you breathing room while we try to clear your name.”
“Is there such a place on Earth?” Julio asked.
Kourtney shook her head, but Dwayne had a suggestion. “There’s only one place you can go where angels won’t follow.”
Hell.
