Dungeon Master by Golden Angel

Chapter Fifteen

Gavin

“The street is bustling, filled with people and stalls for shopping. A dog sits beside one of the food stalls. Colorful birds chirp from cages hanging from another stall. There are weapons, clothing, supplies for travel, and religious artifacts. It’s loud, and the sellers are doing their best to engage your attention—”

“Is the dog for sale?” Aiden interrupted Gavin’s long description of the street fair inside Alderic.

“No.” Gavin opened his mouth to continue his description, but it was too late.

“Does he belong to the food stall owner?” Esther wanted to know, looking curious. Gavin sighed inwardly. Trust Aiden to get distracted and drag the rest of the group off course.

“No, he’s just a stray dog.” Unfortunately, before Gavin could yank them back on task, Aiden jumped in again.

“I want to feed the dog.”

“What?” Gavin stared at him. He didn’t have anything planned for the dog. It was just there to create ambiance. Which, of course, meant Aiden decided to focus on it.

“I want to feed the dog,” Aiden insisted. “I want to try to make friends with it. You said he’s a stray, right?”

“Yes, the fictional dog is a stray.” Gavin now wished he’d said otherwise. Dammit. He glanced over to see Leah’s reaction. She was grinning widely, gaze jumping back and forth between him and Aiden, clearly enjoying Aiden twitting him. Well, as long as he was making Leah smile, he’d take it—even if he wanted to smack Aiden on the back of his thick noggin. Cyana looked impatient as well, but she didn’t say anything.

“Okay, then I want to make friends with the stray.”

“Yay!” Esther clapped her hands before quickly sobering to the more serious demeanor of her elfin character. “I mean, good luck.” Beside her, Jax chuckled and reached out under the table to hold her hand. Gavin wished he could do that with Leah, but as the Dungeon Master, he was—by necessity—too far away. Not that he’d be willing to relinquish his role, he liked being the Dungeon Master, even when his friends were doing their best to mess up his scenarios.

“Fine. Roll for Animal Handling,” he said wearily, already going through the options in his head as Aiden picked up his die. Animal Handlings wasn’t perfect, but it was the first thing he thought of, and he didn’t think there were any rules for trying to make an NPC a pet. They were called Non-Player Characters for a reason. Under five and Aiden’s barbarian was going to get his hand bitten. Maybe infected. Five to ten and—

“Nat twenty.” Aiden grinned widely.

“What?” Gavin half-rose in his seat to try to see. Goddammit. The twenty was facing up on the die, the highest possible number Aiden could have rolled, which guaranteed his success, according to their house rules. Figured. The ‘natural’ twenty didn’t happen often, but Aiden had a knack for rolling them exactly when Gavin wished he wouldn’t.

“Of course, you get a nat twenty when it’s something that doesn’t matter and not when we needed you to get information out of that sorceress,” Cyana muttered balefully, glaring at Aiden.

“It absolutely matters.” Aiden eyed his dice. “Maybe I’m lucky right now… I should try some seduction on Ysolde over here…”

“You wish that was an option, and your ‘persuasion’ sucks, thank God,” Cyana retorted. “You couldn’t even persuade Ysolde to give you a hug.”

“Maybe you could finish making friends with the dog,” Leah pointed out, still grinning before Aiden could respond to Cyana, which was a good thing. She was getting that purse-lipped expression that said she was about two seconds away from physically launching herself at Aiden and smacking the back of his head.

“Right, right.” Aiden’s voice changed, deepening to the one he used for Morag. “Hey, there, little buddy, who’s a good boy. You want to come travel with us?”

Gavin sighed again, but he couldn’t stop the smile from curving his lips. This was why he loved this game—literally, anything could happen. He still remembered in the eighties when some people thought it was basically a Satanic cult and the Castle Masters were the priests who were leading the players down to hell and forcing them to do whatever the Castle Master wanted.

If only they knew. It was like trying to control chaos or herding unruly cats.

“I’m going to give the dog a piece of bacon,” Leah said, her eyes alight. “I want to make friends with him, too.”

Yeah, he had a feeling it was going to be a bit before he managed to get everyone back on track.

* * *

Leah

The guys ended up out on the balcony again during their break, giving Leah time to hang out with Esther and Cyana inside. Things didn’t always split down the middle of the sexes during their breaks, but she knew Esther and Cyana wanted more than her text message that said the therapy appointment had been ‘fine.’ She’d pretty much been expecting the ambush tonight.

“Okay, quickly while they’re outside… tell us everything,” Cyana ordered, one eye on the guys as she leaned on Gavin’s island’s counter before taking a sip of the half-empty beer in her hand.

“It was… fine. Gavin updated Dr. Silverwood on everything that happened during the past week and our weekend. I got to talk a little about why I was ticked we were going to therapy now, on his terms, rather than back when I wanted to go.”

Esther nodded thoughtfully, a small frown forming on her face.

“What did he have to say about that?”

“He apologized. It was a good apology.” Leah sighed, rubbing her hands over her face and glancing over at the balcony. She couldn’t hear what the guys were saying, but Gavin and Jax were both laughing, probably at something Aiden said. “I don’t know. I know we can’t do it over, but… I don’t know if I can move past it. It’s not that I don’t want to give him another chance, but a lot of resentment bubbles up every time I think about how much time has passed.”

“Or you could think about it as, why waste any more time?” As usual, Esther had the sunnier outlook. “I mean, I get it. I’ve been resentful of Jax being so busy lately, but I can either let that go, so we can enjoy our time together, or I can simmer in it. I’d rather enjoy the time we do have together, even if I get ticked that he’d rather go to the gym with the guys on Sunday than hang out with me all day, even though he’s been working extra hours. But I still got him Sunday night. I know it’s not the same, but…”

“No, I get what you’re saying.” And it did make sense. It was just hard to get her emotions in line with the logic. They didn’t necessarily want to cooperate.

“It does sound like he’s trying,” Cyana said, her tone more cautious than Esther’s. “I have to admit, he’s impressing me.”

And considering how protective Cyana was—she’d been the one to give Gavin a come-to-Jesus talk about respecting Leah’s decision at the end of their marriage—that was saying a lot. While she’d maintained friendships with both of them, she’d always made it clear she wasn’t going to let Gavin steamroll Leah. Sometimes, Leah wished she didn’t feel quite so much like a doormat in need of protection, although she also had to admit she’d needed Cyana to be the ballbuster at times when she’d been feeling especially weak.

Her friends balanced her out, Esther with her sunny optimism, and Cyana with her cynical protectiveness. Esther tried to protect her, too, but it was like the difference between a chihuahua and a mastiff. Esther just didn’t have the same kind of intimidating vibe Cyana did.

“Here they come,” Cyana said, straightening up. Leah turned to see Gavin smiling widely at her as he came back through the door. He winked. She flushed.

When the resentment wasn’t holding her back, she could almost forget all the very good reasons she had for being unsure of him. Could she push it back all the time? Get past it enough to give them a real second chance?

Maybe Esther had it right. Maybe she needed to let go of her cynicism and see what Gavin was offering her now instead of focusing on the past.

* * *

Gavin

When everyone else left, Leah went to use his bathroom, assuring Cyana she was fine and Gavin could walk her out if she needed it. Gavin’s heart started to pound with hope. Leah never stayed behind. Even if she had, he would have expected her to ask Cyana to wait for her.

There was only one reason for her to stay behind tonight—she wanted to talk to him.

He’d thought the day had gone fairly well, though it had been hard to hear her resentment during the session with Dr. Silverwood. At least they’d ended on a good note. She had cause for resentment. It had stirred some of his own residual anger as well, but he’d pushed it back. He’d had weeks to work that out with Dr. Silverwood, whereas it had been the first time Leah was able to talk about it.

Keeping his cool was easier when he remembered how he’d ranted during those first few sessions with Dr. Silverwood.

Maybe he should see if Leah wanted to meet with the psych on her own to get some of that out where he didn’t have to listen. He wanted to know how she was feeling, but he knew how therapeutic it was to be able to rant without having to worry about how the person listening would take his words. That was something they couldn’t even get from their friends because there was no way for them to be unbiased.

The nerves started to get to him as he waited for her, so he tidied a few things up around the main areas of the condo. Okay, truthfully, he moved things around. Nothing really needed to be tidied. He cleaned up every Tuesday night in preparation for people coming over on Wednesday, which was how he kept the place neat, so there really wasn’t much to do, but he found he couldn’t sit still waiting for her.

When Leah came back down the hallway, she looked as nervous as he felt, which was some consolation. A small, unsure smile on her face, hands wiping damply at her jeans, she had worry in her eyes.

“Hey.” He wasn’t sure where to start.

“Hey.”

Apparently, neither did she. But she was the one who had stayed behind. Honestly, he’d planned to give her some time, then try to contact her on Friday to see if she wanted to do something over the weekend. Try to make a date. So, he waited her out, wanting to know what she wanted to say rather than trying to take charge of the conversation like he normally would. It felt odd, but after a long moment, it actually worked.

“I uh… I was thinking… or I guess, wondering, what would a second chance look like to you?”

The hope that had bloomed in his chest burst wide open, and he couldn’t stop himself from grinning, even when it made her scowl. Tread lightly, tread lightly… She was still skittish, and he didn’t want to fuck this up. As much as he wanted to blurt out, it meant getting back together, staying together, and growing old—well, older—together, that wasn’t the first step. That was the end goal. They still had to get there.

“I’d like to start by taking you out on a date,” he said softly. “A real date, I hopefully won’t ruin.”

Humor curved her lips and glinted in her eyes. That was a good sign.

“What else? How do we go from this,”—she waved her hand back and forth between them—“to… wherever you want to go.”

Ah, perhaps it was time to be clear.

“I want us to go back to being married, or if not married, then in a committed relationship and living together for the rest of our days. You in my arms every night and there beside me when I wake up in the morning. I’d prefer married; it makes all the legal stuff easier.” He’d settle for her by his side because they could figure out the legal stuff. It would just take a little more work. She was worth the work. “I know it’s not possible to start fresh or start over, but I’d like to start from where we are and rebuild what we had, but better this time because we know where we went wrong before.”

“What about sex? The Outlands?”

Gavin spread his arms wide. He managed to keep his expression serious, but he knew his eyes were twinkling.

“Consider me at your service,” he purred.

Leah gave him a look. “Be serious.”

“I am, love. Any time you want sex or to scene, let me know.” He’d pop a little blue pill if he had to, though he knew he didn’t need his cock to satisfy her. Leah got satisfaction out of his pleasure, too, so he wouldn’t want to deny her that.

“I don’t know if I’m ready yet.”

Dropping his arms to his sides, Gavin gave her his most disarming smile.

“Then that’s fine too, love. We can take things slow.” Whatever she needed. The physical part wasn’t the problem for them.

“I don’t know if I want slow, either.” She scrubbed her hands over her face in frustration, and Gavin stepped forward, pulling her into his arms. To his relief, she snuggled against him, leaning into him for his strength, the way she used to.

“Lass, do you want me to make the decision?”

* * *

Leah

Ugh. She shouldn’t, right? That was one of their problems from before. Gavin had made so many unilateral decisions without ever consulting her, assuming he knew what was best. On the other hand, many times, she really had been relieved when he’d taken charge. It had been easier.

After all this time apart, she should know more of what she wanted. Right? She should be able to advocate for herself, but she did want someone else to decide. She wanted two things at once and didn’t know what she wanted more. She wanted to keep her heart protected, but she didn’t want to lose the connection they had now.

“That’s wrong, isn’t it? I should be able to decide. I shouldn’t ask you to decide for me.” Voicing the problem made her vulnerable, but Gavin didn’t judge her. Because he wants to make the decisions, a cynical voice in her head pointed out. Leah decided to ignore it. She pressed her cheek against his chest, taking comfort in feeling his heartbeat and in the strong arms around her, holding her safe and secure.

Ironic, really, that the person who could hurt her the most was also the person who made her feel the safest.

“Remember what Dr. Silverwood said? Stop thinking about ‘should’ and focus on what you actually want. I have a suggestion if you want to hear it.”

Well, that was new. She’d half-expected him to take over the way he would have in the past. Leah nodded her head, kinda wishing he wasn’t wearing a shirt, so she could rub her cheek against the bristles of his chest hair. Why she’d always liked that feeling, she had no idea, but it was one of her favorites.

“Let’s keep our relationship to the Outlands, for now. That way, we’re keeping that part of our relationship at its current status rather than taking a step back. We can work on everything else. When we’re ready, we’ll move the sex either here or to your house.”

“Here,” Leah said immediately. Gavin chuckled, and she winced. She wanted it to be here because she was protecting her space, her home, just in case. She didn’t want to go into this with him, already thinking it would fail, but she couldn’t forget that was a possibility.

It was a good compromise. They could keep the good stuff in place and focus on what needed work. Talk. Date. She could do that. Leah relaxed. It helped that he’d asked if she wanted his suggestion. This wasn’t giving way to him and what he wanted. It was talking things out as a couple. Progress.

“Here, at first. Hopefully, eventually at your place as well. Or our place. One step at a time.”

One step at a time. She could do that.

Gavin’s hand smoothed over her hair, and she felt his lips press against her forehead.

“Now, love, let me walk you to your car.”

A little smile played on her lips. He’d often said much the same thing when they’d first started dating. Maybe they really could make this work better than before—they knew where they’d gone wrong the first time, and they had help. Yeah, she had some resentment to work out that they hadn’t gone to therapy before, but Esther was right. She didn’t want to waste any more time. They sure as hell weren’t getting any younger.