All the Cuts and Scars We Hide by Garry Michael
Seven: Wyatt
I’ve Been Looking For You
The look of disappointment on Kai’s face when I’d said no to his invitation was still reeling in my head minutes after he’d left. The offer came out of nowhere, so my refusal sounded harsher than I intended it to be. He’d seen me rattled, witnessed my breakdown, and then pulled me back to reality before my episode turned into a full-blown attack, similar to the one I’d had over a week ago. I felt exposed, so I said no.
I should’ve gone with him. I really should’ve, especially now that I was feeling somewhat better, better than I’d ever been after an attack. It wasn’t like he was asking for my kidney or something. It was just a cup of coffee for Christ’s sake.
When I finally had my wits about me and realized how I sounded, I ran the stretch of the dock, trying to catch up to him, but it’d been too late. I looked toward the direction he went, but he was nowhere in sight.
Feeling my exhaustion taking every last drop of my energy, I hopped into my truck and decided to search for him. There were only three coffee shops in town, and they were a block away from each other. I parked equidistant from all of them and started my search at the Sound Café, figuring that’d be a good place to start since I’d seen him there a few times already.
“Good morning, Wyatt! You’re up early today,” Andrea greeted me after I walked in.
I nodded to acknowledge her and looked around to see if Kai was one of the patrons sitting at a table, but to my dismay, there were no signs of him.
“What can I get for you?” she asked.
“Nothing, just looking for someone,” I said before I walked out of the café, hurrying to the next spot. She said goodbye and I waved my hand at her.
I jogged to the next location only to find out that it was closed. One glance at my watch let me know that it wasn’t even six o’clock in the morning yet. That left me with the last place, Starbucks. I groaned.
This establishment was the busiest. Most customers were tourists since locals avoided this place like the plague. The line at the cashier was already five people deep and almost every single table in the lobby was taken by ferry commuters and tourists waiting for their early morning whale watching tours.
I’d never been around this many people after one of my episodes. In fact, Kai was the first person to witness me break down in the middle of an attack. The crowded coffee shop threatened to pull me back to the battlefield, the one in my mind.
My breath started to get heavy and my hands became clammy. I fought the urge to run away and walked closer to the back of the store to check if Kai was there, but just like The Sound Café, he wasn’t.
Suddenly feeling fatigued, my shoulders sagged, and I headed toward the exit, bumping a distracted customer along the way.
“What the fuck dude?” he spat, giving me a death glare.
But I didn’t care, I just needed to get out of there. I waved my apology then headed out. Once I got in my truck, my eyelids grew heavy and I began to doze off.
A continuous tapping on my window woke me and I found Avery looking in. I hadn’t realized that I’d fallen asleep in my truck. Concern was written all over his face. I rolled my window down and the cool morning breeze coming from the water nearby, somehow sobered me.
“What’s up?” I asked once the window was down, hoping to hide the unsteadiness of my voice.
“What are you doing here?” he said after looking in the bed of my truck. “You look like shit,” he continued and reached over to touch the sleeve of my shirt. “And you’re soaked.”
I brushed his hand away from my shirt. “I’m fine. Will you let Elizabeth know that I’ll be late today? I don’t have any trips scheduled so it shouldn’t be an issue.”
“The fuck dude, what’s wrong?”
Instead of answering, I jammed my keys into the ignition and my truck roared to life with a grumble. “I said I’m fine. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Wyatt!” he yelled while stepping back to let me drive away and looking perplexed at my behavior.
The following morning, after another successful charter, I started cleaning up the boat to make sure we’d be ready for the next sailing. It’d been great seeing the pod of Orcas minutes after we sailed. It was an amazing experience for our customers and even better for me. It meant not spending the entire morning looking for the elusive creatures, which allowed extra time to stop by the café and to check if Kai was there.
“I heard you saw a pod of Orcas this morning,” Avery said after exiting the office and grabbing one of the hoses to power wash the deck of the boat, a routine we did after each sailing. I suspected that he wasn’t there to help or chat about the Orcas, and my speculation was confirmed when he continued. “You still go to your appointments, right?” he inquired.
I pulled the rope attached to the boat and tied it on one of the hooks on our wooden dock, close to where Kai had last seen me. What a way to meet. He probably thinks I’m some kind of loser who breaks down in public, that thought made me cringe. I didn’t know what about the last episode was different, but it was. Not better, not worse, just different.
“Wyatt,” Avery called me back to the present.
“What?” I nearly barked. Chit-chat after sailing a boat load of talkative tourists, was the last thing I needed.
“Don’t what me. What happened yesterday?” Avery’s rapid firing of questions continued.
“Nothing happened.”
“Bullshit! You fell asleep in your truck, wearing the same clothes you had from the night before.”
“I just had another episode, but I’m fine now.”
Avery studied me, not buying it. As much as I hated being interrogated, I knew that he only wanted to make sure I was alright. “We’re here for you, man. We’re family. Don’t shut us out.”
“I know… I’ll be okay.”
He dropped the subject and helped me finish cleaning the boat, then walked with me as we headed to our office. “Oh, before I forget, we’ve been meaning to ask you something.”
Oh, what the fuck now? I held my breath for another onslaught of questions. “What?” I asked, gritting my teeth.
“Geez, you need another cup of coffee!” Avery chuckled.
“I’ve been trying to get out of here to get some, but you keep bugging me.”
“Anyway, we’re thinking if it’s time to renovate our office. The business has been thriving since we added the fourth boat, and this old shack is showing its age,” Avery explained.
It was a great idea. We’d been putting it off for months and investing in a remodel of our space was a smart business decision. “Let’s update our software too, so I don’t have to listen to you bitch about reports,” I said.
“Terrific, we’ll start looking for an architect and contractor. Elizabeth will go apeshit after I tell her you agreed.”
“Okay, I’ve got to go!” I grabbed my truck keys and he didn’t even wait for me to leave before calling his wife.
“Hey, babe—Elijah? Can you give the phone to mommy? Hey baby, Wyatt’s on board. It took a lot of convincing, but he caved. You owe me big time.”
I shook my head at his ridiculousness. I would never admit it, but I envied what Avery and Elizabeth had. Only if I was that lucky.
“If you’re here for the muffins, we’re sold out,” Andrea greeted me when I walked into the café.
“It’s okay,” I said, looking around. The place was packed as usual, but the one person I wanted to see again was nowhere around. I hope he didn’t stop coming here so he could avoid me.
I shook away the self-destructive thoughts and made my way out and instead of heading back to my truck, I decided to walk on the beach to get some fresh air, something that I rarely did. Ironic, since I practically lived on a boat.
The disappointment of not being able to see Kai diminished the closer I got to the beach. The sound of waves and the breeze coming from the water blowing on my face relaxed me and I thought about the number of times I used to spend on this boardwalk with Avery when we were thinking about what kind of business to open together.
“Wyatt?”
Goosebumps erupted over my entire body after hearing my name. I knew who it was before turning to where it came from. Kai.
He was sitting on one of the pieces of driftwood resting on the shore and he stood up when he saw me walking toward him, uncertainty on his face.
“Hi,” Kai said, looking down at his feet playing with a small rock on the beach, his hands tucked into his pockets when I reached him.
“I’m sorry—” I was interrupted by a group of screeching seagulls passing by, screaming ha-ha-ha loud enough to drown my voice.
“What?” Kai asked before leaning closer.
“I’m sorry for turning down your invitation?” I continued.
His eyes furrowed in confusion. “You are? Why?”
Flabbergasted. I searched for the best things to say but nothing came out.
Kai looked at me expecting an answer. The wind blew his hair, partially covering his forehead, and the urge to touch him and put it back in place felt foreign.
The longer I stayed quiet, the higher the tension got. “Wanna have some coffee? I know a great place. You might have seen me there once… or four times?” Surprised at my attempt to land a joke, I shoved a hand through my hair and tried not to grimace.
Kai was unable to hide his smirk and the harder he tried, the more the dimples on his cheeks deepened. The most kissable red lips parted and his face brightened. “You know, they’ll be out of muffins, right?”
God, he’s gorgeous.