The Bonds We Break by Becca Steele

SIX

The noises of showers running, people shouting to each other, and slamming doors finally stopped. I waited another ten minutes just to be sure before making my way out of bed. After a quick shower, I threw on another pair of jogging bottoms and a loose navy T-shirt. The T-shirt slipped off my shoulders, and I examined myself in the mirror. I’d lost weight. Too much. But I couldn’t bring myself to care.

My stomach growled, and I knew I should eat. I ignored that, too, until it growled again. Winding my damp hair into a ponytail, I grabbed my car keys and handbag. There was no way I was eating here, not when everyone had made it clear how unwelcome I was.

As I headed down the hallway, a crash and the sound of Cassius swearing sounded from somewhere in his room. Without even thinking it through, I stepped up to his door and knocked.

The door swung open, and I was confronted by Cassius wearing nothing but a pair of tight black boxers. My mouth went dry, and I snapped my eyes up to his face, keeping them there with an effort. He frowned down at me, frustration in his gaze, his nostrils flared. “Are you okay?” I ventured.

“No,” he said shortly, stepping back and to the side, swinging the door open. I took that as an invitation to enter his room.

“What’s the matter?” Leaning against the wall, I glanced around his room. Anything to avoid my gaze straying towards his gorgeous body, so close to me. My eyes barely took in the décor of soft greys and the monstrously oversized bed that dominated the centre of the space before they returned to him. The corners of his lip curved up in amusement, the frustration melting away.

“Take a good look.” He spread out his arms. “It’s—”

“No.” I held up my hand, biting my lip to contain my smile. “Just stop. Tell me what the problem is, and we can discuss your huge ego another time.”

“And my huge—”

Lunging forwards, I slammed my hand over his mouth, feeling him laugh under my palm. His fingers came up to curl around my hand, prying it away from his face. “Okay, okay.” He shoved his thumbs in front of my face. “This. I need to shave.”

Last night in the kitchen…another wave of hurt swamped me, making me catch my breath. I’d almost forgotten about what had happened, what he’d said, too distracted by his presence, but now, everything came flooding back to me. “It wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t invited me to stay when I clearly wasn’t welcome.”

Guilt flared in his eyes, and he lowered his hand. “I didn’t mean it like that. You misheard me.”

“I know what I heard, Cass.” Slumping back against the wall, I sighed. “And I get it. I don’t hold it against you, honestly.” I’d been awake most of the night, thinking about it, and it was obvious I couldn’t stay here much longer, not when it was clear that no one wanted me here. My apartment didn’t feel safe, so my plan was to search for a hotel or Airbnb later. It wasn’t like I couldn’t afford it. I shouldn’t have allowed Cassius to talk me into staying in the first place, but I’d been so shaken by the photo that I hadn’t been thinking straight.

A low growl came from his throat, and I stared at him, surprised, as his eyes narrowed. “You. Mis. Heard. Me.”

“Whatever. Can we not talk about it now, please?” Grasping for anything to change the subject, I pushed off the wall. “Do you want me to help you with shaving?”

“What?”

“I can help. I had to help my brother out when he broke his arm.”

He stared at me for a moment, then nodded slowly. “Okay. Thank—” His phone sounded loudly, cutting him off, and I took the opportunity to admire his ass flexing as he walked over to his dresser.

“Fucking wanker,” he muttered, frowning at his screen.

“What?”

Turning, he held up his phone, and I stepped closer to view the screen. I had to bite my lip hard to contain my smile. It was a message from Weston with a photo captioned “thumbs up!” The image was of him and Lena, sticking both of their thumbs up. As I stared at it, another message came through beneath the photo. It said, “Shame you can’t do this without looking like a twat.”

Cassius growled under his breath, stabbing at his phone and replying with a string of middle finger emojis. “Don’t start,” he warned when I couldn’t contain my smile any longer, but before he turned away, I caught his own smile tugging at his lips.

Throwing his phone onto the bed, he turned and headed into his en suite, and I placed my keys and handbag down, then followed him in. The bathroom was in disarray—a can of shaving foam lying on its side in the sink, foam bubbling out of it, the tap left running. A towel was thrown across the floor, and water splashes decorated the tiles. Cassius glanced around the room, subtly winced, then gave me an innocent look, widening his eyes. “What?”

“I didn’t say anything.” A reluctant smile found its way onto my face again. What was it about Cassius that made me feel lighter after I’d been feeling hopeless for so long?

Now wasn’t the time to think about it.

I directed him to sit on the side of the bath while I rinsed the foam out of the sink, then filled the basin with warm water. He tracked my movements with interest, his gaze boring into me, and I shot him a small smile as I turned back from the sink and carefully dampened his skin before applying shaving foam to his jaw.

When I returned with the razor, he’d widened his legs. I paused and then realised that it made sense for me to stand as close to him as possible, so I stepped between them. From this position, I could see the ring of darker blue that ran around his irises. His thick brown lashes were lowered, his gaze on my mouth.

“I didn’t mean it about you,” he said softly. He raised his head, his eyes meeting mine, and I could see the truth in them. Giving him a nod of assent, I lightly gripped the back of his head, his hair soft beneath my hand.

“Ready?”

He remained silent, so I took that as my cue to begin. I uncapped the razor and began to drag it across his skin, slowly and carefully. The room fell silent, and every tiny sound seemed magnified. The scrape of the razor over stubble, Cassius’ breaths close to me, my own breaths, faster than they’d normally be, no matter how unaffected I told myself I was.

Cassius shifted slightly when I lifted the razor away from his skin to check my handiwork, his legs closing, trapping me between his muscular thighs. An involuntary shiver went through my body, and I swallowed, needing moisture for my suddenly dry throat.

“Okay?” he murmured, and I wasn’t exactly sure what he was asking me, but I nodded. His hands came up to rest lightly on my hips. “Just steadying you.” A familiar grin appeared on his face, but when my eyes met his, there was something else there. Something I wasn’t sure I was reading correctly. Either that, or my imagination was running away with me.

Turning my attention back to my task, I decided I was imagining things. Until one of the hands resting on my hip slid upwards, under the hem of my T-shirt, and then his fingers were resting on my bare skin.

Every single inch of me zeroed in on that one tiny patch of skin, my nerve endings alight with sensation as his index finger moved almost imperceptibly, stroking up and down. It was too much but not enough. The desire that I thought had died that night at the docks raced through my veins, shocking me with its intensity. My nipples hardened, visible beneath the fabric of my top, and goosebumps popped out along my arms.

What the fuck?Cassius was barely touching me.

With effort, I kept my hand steady, finishing up my task as quickly as possible. Of course it didn’t mean anything. This was Cassius. He probably wasn’t even aware of what he was doing, the movements instinctual to him.

“I think I’m done.” Thankfully, my voice didn’t betray me, sounding more or less normal. “I just need to rinse off the razor.”

He remained silent, not even looking at me.

When I stepped back, his hands dropped to his thighs, and he cleared his throat. As I turned away, he shifted slightly, and my eyes flashed downwards.

A tiny gasp escaped me, and I immediately slammed my mouth shut.

He was hard.

Not fully hard, but hard enough that it was noticeable. And how strange was it that I was intimately acquainted with the size of Cassius’ dick that I instantly knew that information?

My cheeks grew hot, and I stared down at the sink while I dampened a cloth. Overriding everything else I was feeling, though, was that same fizzing excitement I’d had around him before.

I wasn’t broken. I could feel again.

Stepping back over to him, careful to avoid his gaze, I cleaned the rest of the shaving foam from his face. His skin was warm and smooth beneath my fingers, and I could feel the flex of his jaw as I slid the cloth over his face.

I took an unsteady breath. “Okay. I’m finished. I’m…I’m going to go now.”

“Go where?” His voice came out lower than usual.

“Out. Uh, breakfast. And I’m going to look for a hotel to stay in.”

“No.” He gripped my arm, his eyes darkening. “You’re not going anywhere. You’re staying here.”

“Why does it matter to you where I stay? We’re not exactly friends, Cass.”

“Yes, we are.” When I raised a brow, he added, “Maybe not close friends, but we are friends.”

“Even so. Why is it important to you?” I asked quietly, my curiosity getting the better of me.

He was silent for a while, his brow creased in thought. “I feel responsible for you.”

My stomach twisted. “I’m not your charity case. And I already have one big brother, I don’t need another.”

“We’re the same age. And…” A glint came into his eye. His grip on my arm loosened, his hand moving lower until he was covering my hand. He slid his fingers between mine, then he tugged my arm forwards suddenly, pressing my hand over the bulge in his boxers.

With a screech, I yanked my hand away, stumbling backwards and hitting the sink. Helpless laughter overtook him, his shoulders shaking, and I gave him a savage glare.

“What the fuck, Cass?”

When he finally managed to control his laughter, he straightened up, meeting my gaze. “Just showing you that our relationship isn’t sibling-y.” A far too innocent smile appeared on his face.

“Sibling-y isn’t a word. But seriously, what the fuck?”

“Don’t pretend you didn’t like it.”

Maybe I did, but that was beside the point. Shaking my head, I turned away from him, moving towards the door. “Bye.”

“Wait.” He hauled me backwards against his body, his arm coming around my waist. “I’m sorry.”

His nearness affected me way more than I was comfortable with right now. “I have to go.”

Releasing me, he spun me to face him. “Jessa.” His bright blue eyes were wide and troubled, all his humour wiped away. I instantly missed it.

“It’s…” I struggled to articulate my thoughts. “This whole situation is…” My words trailed off.

“Tell me.” There was a softness to his voice that I’d never heard before. “Please. I promise I won’t say anything to anyone.”

His words broke something deep inside, cracking open and exposing me. It was almost a relief to say the words I’d kept hidden for so long. “I’m tired.” My eyes filled with tears, my voice wobbling. “Tired of it all.”

He reached out to me again, tugging me against him and encircling me in his arms.

The final thread of my composure snapped and I let go, laying my head against his chest and allowing the tears to fall. His hand stroked soothingly up and down my back, through my hair, comforting me as I cried.

“What happened scared me so much. I can’t sleep, not without nightmares. I…” My words caught in my throat. “I feel like I’m just going through the motions.”

“You haven’t been eating properly, have you?”

I shook my head against him. “It’s…I haven’t been interested.”

“You said before that you wanted to get back to normal. You wanted me to treat you normally, yeah?”

Swallowing hard, I whispered against his chest. “Yes.”

Pulling back, he gave me a confident smile, his hand still rubbing gently over my back. “In that case, no more talk of leaving. We can’t do anything about Littlefinger yet, but I’m not going to let anything happen to you. None of us will. Even if they’re not as…happy…about you being here, they’ve got your back.” His eyes flashed, his tone turning harsh. “If Littlefinger dares to try anything, he’ll regret ever messing with us.”

Something in his absolute certainty gave me hope, and I gave him a tentative smile, blinking my tears away. “I hope you’re right.”

“I’m always right,” he assured me. His eyes swept over me, his gaze assessing, and then he pursed his lips. “Go and get changed into something you feel good in. Or felt good in. We’re getting you back to normal. Pack an overnight bag, then text your brother and get us put on the VIP list for his club.”

“What?”

A grin curved over his lips. “I’m going to remind you of everything you love. First, I’m taking you out for food. Then we’re going to hit London hard, and you’re gonna have the best night of your life.”

I held his gaze, warring with myself, before I gave in and returned his smile with a small, hesitant one of my own. Cassius…I didn’t know what it was exactly, but he seemed to quiet the storm inside my head, to give me hope that I could get through this.

It was time to put my trust in him.

“I’d like that.”