Expecting the SEAL’s Baby by Katie Knight

Twenty-Six

“Almost there,” Gina said to her brother on the trip from the airport to their mother’s house. “Are you ready?”

“To be hugged to death? You bet.” Blake had a huge smile on his face as they turned onto the street. “I’ve been looking forward to it.

“She’s been waiting for us.” Gina saw Camilla Greenwood burst through the front door as soon as the Uber stopped in front of the house.

Blake was barely out of the car before her mother had pulled him into a tight hug. Sam came up to Gina and slung an arm around her shoulders.

“She’s been watching out the window since you called from the airport,” her stepfather said, giving her a kiss on the temple.

“The traffic was worse than usual. I’m sorry it took so long to get here.” Gina felt tears come to her eyes as she watched mother and son embrace. She’d helped make this happen. She and Jeremy. Even thinking about him brought a sharp pain to her heart. She pushed that aside. This was a joyous moment for her family.

“Doesn’t matter. She has you both safely home. That’s all that’s important.” Sam released her and took their bags from the Uber driver. He put them down again to hug Blake himself and then ushered everyone into the house.

“Sweetheart.” Her mother engulfed Gina in her own hug when they stood in the foyer. It felt good to be held by her mom, safe and loved. Gina had to fight back tears again. “I knew you and Jeremy would bring him home. Where is Jeremy?”

“He was on a later flight,” Gina said, casting a glance toward her brother. “I don’t know when he lands.”

“He knows to come see me, though, doesn’t he?” Camilla asked. “I want to thank him personally.”

“I’m sure he’ll stop by, Mom,” Blake said, saving Gina from having to answer. “Jeremy loves you like you’re his own mother.”

“Good. I’ll look forward to seeing him.” Camilla pointed toward the dining room. “Let’s eat.”

They sat at the table where Blake proved he’d gotten his appetite back. During the meal, he smiled and talked, making their mother happy. This is what matters, Gina thought. They were a family, and they’d welcome her child, who would be safe and loved. A tear ran down Gina’s cheek, and she brushed it away quickly when she thought of how her baby wouldn’t have the father she deserved. Her moment wasn’t fast enough to escape her mother’s notice.

“Gina—” her mother began.

“I’ll start washing up,” Gina said, rising and gathering plates quickly before going to the kitchen. Once there, she ran water in the sink at full blast, intentionally blocking out the conversation that she guessed was going on in the dining room. Her mother was likely questioning Blake about Gina’s mood. When she shut the water off, her mother was standing near her.

“Did Blake tell you?” Gina asked, almost hoping that her brother had. It would make it easier on her in a way.

“He said I had to ask you myself. Gina, what is it? Leave the dishes. Come sit with me and talk. It’s just us. Blake and Sam have gone into the backyard.” Camilla pulled Gina over to the kitchen table and they both sat.

“I’m pregnant, Mom,” Gina said without preamble. “I went to Jeremy’s apartment one night, a few days after he got home from overseas. One thing led to another, and I’m pregnant.”

Her mother’s smile was instant and genuine. “You and Jeremy are having a baby. Oh, sweetheart, that’s wonderful.” Her mother hugged her. “I can’t say that I’m surprised. Sam and I have talked about the possibility of the two of you getting together for years.”

“You have?” Gina was shocked by that. She knew her mother liked Jeremy, but she’d never suspected this. “We’re not really together.” Gina told the story again of her brief relationship with Jeremy, their adventure together in Colombia, and the end of their romance. “I guess he’s doing me a favor in a way,” Gina concluded. “He’s broken it off, so I won’t be waiting for him to come home from missions and wondering where he is. I wouldn’t want that life. I watched…”

“Watched me go through that,” her mother finished for her. “I hope you aren’t thinking that Jeremy is anything like your father. Because he’s not.”

“But he is. He’s more dedicated to the service than he’d be to…to his family.”

“That was true of your father, too,” Camilla said. “And I could have lived with that. It was the other things.”

“His cheating,” Gina said bluntly. They’d long since brought the subject out into the open.

“Do you think Jeremy would be unfaithful to you?” her mother asked.

“No,” Gina said quickly. She knew he wouldn’t, but that didn’t excuse the way he’d made a choice without even talking to her. He’d prioritized his career over being with her and the baby.

“Then you can’t pin that baggage on him. I’ve known Jeremy for close to ten years now,” Camilla said. “He’s a good man, and he’s nothing like your father. I promise you that.”

Gina didn’t know what to say. She thought about the memories of her father. He’d been completely out of their lives by the time she was a teenager, but even thinking of him brought back the guilt she carried about that message she’d deleted. Now seemed the time to confess it.

“Mom, I have to tell you something,” Gina said, her words rushing before she could stop herself. As succinctly as she could, she told her mom about deleting the message. While she couldn’t fully regret her action, it had haunted her for years. “What if…what if he meant what he said?” she asked when she’d finished her story. “He sounded so sincere about getting back together with you, but I was afraid of what would happen. And you were just starting to date Sam, who’s a wonderful man. I did what I thought was best, but I…I shouldn’t have done it. I hope you can forgive me.”

“Gina, do you know how many times your father left a message like that?” Her mother shook her head.

“That wasn’t the only one?”

“Goodness, no. I got four or so of those a year right up until the time I married Sam. Sam’s the one who put a stop to it in the end.” Camilla had a faint smile on her face.

“I can’t imagine Sam yelling at Dad,” Gina said. Her stepfather was mild manner and loving.

“He didn’t yell. He just explained that your father’s messages and presence were no longer welcome. Sam did invite him to stay in contact with you and Blake, but he chose not to, which I think is telling. He could have had a relationship with you, independent of me. Sometimes, I wish he would have. Not having that has damaged you and Blake in ways that I was never able to compensate for,” Camilla said. “If anyone needs to ask forgiveness, it’s your father. He should have reached out to you and Blake years ago. I try to tell myself that it’s his loss because he doesn’t know how remarkable and brave you both are.”

“Jeremy’s not going to know his child either, and that makes me…miserable.” Sad wasn’t a strong enough word for what Gina was feeling.

“Maybe he will,” her mother said.

“He was clear about it.” Gina replayed their conversation on the patio in her head. “He even insisted that the baby and I would be better off without him.”

Her mother pulled a face. “That’s nonsense.”

Gina sighed. “I know.” They sat in silence for a few minutes when Camilla covered Gina’s hand with her own.

“The baby will be well loved by many people,” her mother said. “Not having a father in his or her life will have an impact, but it won’t be devastating. Listen to me on this because I know. You’re a strong woman, which is good since being a single mother is challenging.”

“I’ll have you and Sam, and Blake when he’s home. I’ll have my friends. I won’t be alone.” Gina tried to think about how lucky she was to have a loving support system.

“Of course, you won’t, but I can’t help but be worried about your heart. Do you love Jeremy?”

“Jeremy’s always been a friend,” Gina said, avoiding the true meaning of her mother’s question. Her mother raised an eyebrow and waited. “I do love him. I didn’t realize how much until it was over.”

“So you didn’t tell him?”

“No, I’m sure he doesn’t…”

“Love you? Of course, he does. He wouldn’t have gotten involved with you romantically if he didn’t. He has too much respect for you and this family.”

“Maybe,” Gina whispered. Was it possible that Jeremy loved her? But even if he did, would that change anything?

“You know I could have fought harder for your father, but I knew that our love wasn’t strong enough,” Camilla said. “We made beautiful children together, but we were never going to be true partners. When I found Sam, I sensed immediately that we could be partners and lovers. I would have fought to keep him if I’d needed to. Luckily, I didn’t have to.” Her mother smiled for a second and then grew serious. “Is Jeremy worth fighting for? Is he worth putting in the work to make your love grow and deepen? If he is, there’s more proof that your relationship with him is nothing like mine was with your father.”

Gina couldn’t answer her mother’s questions. In her heart, she wanted to think that she and Jeremy could have that kind of love. But could they? His actions suggested otherwise, but what if she told him how she felt about him? What if she’d been willing to try, to fight for him?

She couldn’t predict what he would do, but it was worth considering since she knew she wanted a future for her and their baby that included him.

* * *

Jeremy’s flight had been delayed, causing him to arrive home the following morning. He’d slept a few hours out of pure exhaustion before getting up. He stood in his living room, taking a look around. He needed to put his life in order so that he would be ready to deploy when called. With that in mind, he started by sorting the mail that had come during his time in Colombia.

Prepping to be gone for an extended period wasn’t anything new or taxing, but somehow his heart wasn’t in it. In the past, it had always come with a rush of adrenaline, knowing that he’d be on a mission shortly. Right now, though, the rush wasn’t there. In its place was a strange emptiness.

Had he made the wrong decision about rejoining the service? He tapped the letter he held against his open palm. When he’d been offered the chance to be a SEAL again, he’d thought about it for less than fifteen seconds before accepting. He’d gone with his first instinct, but now he was second guessing himself.

On the other hand, joining the civilian world full time wasn’t something he’d ever wanted to do. Hell, in the time he’d been home before traveling to South America, he’d been lost, not knowing where his place was outside the military. So he’d done nothing about his future since he’d banked on the opportunity to clear his name and join his SEAL team again. That prospect didn’t look as rosy as it once had.

Was this some kind of crossroads for him? Did he need to think about his next chapter?

He systematically sorted the mail as he considered his options. Stay and figure out a new plan for his life or return to what he’d known? He couldn’t clear the image of Gina from his mind. If he gave up his career, would….?

No, he shook his head. When he’d said to her that she and the baby were better off without him, he’d meant it. Not because of his job but because of who he was. What he did next wasn’t going to change that. He stalked over to the shredder with a pile of credit card offers and shoved them through.

Just as he finished his task, he heard a knock on his door. For a brief second, he imagined that it was Gina, but reality quickly set in. It wouldn’t be her, not after the way he left it between them. And even if it was, what would he say to her? He still wasn’t a good bargain for her.

Jeremy went to the door, planning to get rid of whoever it was quickly, but when he opened it, he saw Blake standing on his doorstep. His friend already looked better. The bruising on his face was faded, and he’d started to regain some of the lost weight.

“Thought I’d come by and share the good news,” Blake said as he walked in, uninvited. “I’ve been on the phone with Mason. Percy’s in custody. No trial date yet, but his conviction is assured.”

“Good to hear.” Jeremy wanted his former teammate to spend a long time in prison thinking about what he’d done.

“And,” Blake continued, “the Kid’s off life support and is doing okay. He’s planning on coming back to the team.”

Jeremy thought about the last time he’d seen the Kid—back in Afghanistan right before Jeremy shipped out. The Kid had been hooked up to machines that kept him in a coma-like state while his body recovered from gunshot wounds sustained in the firefight on the day Blake was kidnapped.

“Maybe we can all be a team again if the guys still trust me.” Jeremy had been worried about that. Trust was critical for their work, and he couldn’t be sure that wasn’t broken.

“Why wouldn’t they?” Blake questioned, shooting him a look. “This mess wasn’t your fault.”

“I led them into a trap,” Jeremy said.

“Bad intel. It happens,” Blake said with a shrug as he sat on the sofa. “Besides, you cleared your name. They’ll respect that.”

Jeremy knew it wasn’t that simple. He’d give anything to go back in time and do that day over, but it wasn’t possible, and he had to live with the fallout. If that meant joining a different team, then that might be the price he had to pay.

If he was returning at all. That thought persisted.

“Gina told me about the baby,” Blake said.

“God, I’m sorry, Blake.” Jeremy’s worries about his military career instantly vanished. This was a totally different concern. “I didn’t mean to get involved with Gina. It just happened. You can punch me if you want to.”

“Why the hell would I do that?” Blake asked.

Because I got your sister pregnant and I’m going to leave her.Jeremy considered punching himself when he thought about it that way. “You know why.”

“Because you’re going to walk away from her?” Blake suggested. “You need to explain that part to me.”

Jeremy spent the next ten minutes attempting to do exactly that, tripping over his own words as he tried to list the reasons why he wasn’t good for Gina and the baby. Blake knew all about Jeremy’s family, knew that he hadn’t had the right kind of example. He didn’t know how to raise a kid with love and understanding, but Blake still looked doubtful when Jeremy finished.

“Let me see if I’ve got this straight.” Blake leaned forward. “You won’t be with my sister and your child because you don’t see yourself as good enough for them.”

“That’s about the size of it,” Jeremy said.

“Complete horseshit,” Blake declared. “You know what I see when I look at you? I see a man who not only trekked through the jungle to rescue me, but brought my sister along, so she didn’t sit at home worrying or worse, go off on her own expedition. I don’t know what your definition of family is, but in my book, that’s what family does.”

“Your father—”

“Don’t bring him into this. Just because Mom had a bad experience with a military guy doesn’t mean that Gina will,” Blake said. “And you aren’t like him. Not even a little. He walked away from the people who needed him. You’ve never done that in your life.”

Jeremy had no idea how to respond to Blake’s statements. His own family had rarely seen the good qualities in him, but maybe that didn’t matter. He’d made his own family, in a way. Blake and Gina were vital parts of that.

“Look,” Blake said and stood before walking toward the door, “I’ve got one more thing to say and then you can tell me to mind my own damn business. There’s no one I’d rather see Gina with than you. The two of you, Mom, and Sam are my family.”

“Thanks, that means a lot to me.” Jeremy knew the words were inadequate, but it was all he could manage.

“Come by the house,” Blake said. “Mom wants to see you.”

Blake let himself out and Jeremy slumped back on the couch, thinking about what his friend had said. Families came in all shapes and sizes. Could he make a family with Gina and their baby? More importantly, could he get it right? Because the last thing he wanted to do was disappoint her. He already had in ways, but she was a woman with a lot of heart. She might…she might forgive him and give him the chance to build something with her.