Grand Love by JC Hawke

9

Nina

When I was a child,I told myself that letting people in was dangerous. Trying to protect the people around you is dangerous. Because they will hurt you. They find the things that will hit the hardest and use them to cause you pain.

It’s why I don’t let people in easily.

“If you came here to hurt me, then mission accomplished.” I clench my jaw, hating how my voice cracks.

Anger is etched into every plane of his face, his body vibrating with the same fury. My eyes don’t leave him as he turns and leaves the apartment.

The second the door slams shut, the tears come, and I let them. This has been brewing between us all week and it had to happen. I always knew it wouldn’t be pretty, but I never expected it to end uglier than it already was.

I hoped we could find some closure.

Deep down inside, I know Mason isn’t a bad person, and he wouldn’t have meant the words he just threw at me. But he intended to hurt me. A quick hit to make him feel better.

I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to the way his words can cut me so easily.

“Nina,” his voice startles me.

I spin, rolling my lips as my throat burns. I try to contain the sob that breaks through but it’s impossible. My knees buckle as I cover my face.

“I’m sorry.” He closes the distance between us, pulling me into his chest.

I fall against him, giving in to the resistance and allowing him to heal the parts of me that only being in his arms can fix. My body shakes as I let it leave me, freeing myself of the emotions I’ve kept bottled up since the night I left.

His lips find my hair and I feel him inhale. I close my eyes and take my own deep breath, trying to commit this moment to memory. Because the moment he lets me go, I know I won’t be pulled back in again.

“We need to find a way to make this work.” My heart thuds hard against his chest, a warmth soaring through me. “Ellis deserves better than this.”

Ellis. Of course he’s talking about Ellis.

“If we can’t be civil for his sake” —he leans back, looking down at me— “then maybe it would be better to go back to the old setup, just for a while.”

He doesn’t want to see me. “Is that what you want?”

He watches me intently, as if I’m a mystery he can’t figure out. “It doesn’t matter what I want.”

It’s too much. He’s too much. Pulling back, I wipe my face then wrap my arms around myself.

“I didn’t mean what I said, Nina, I’m sorry. I know how much it hurts you and I won’t do it again. I mean that.”

I nod my head, wiping my face. “We both said some shitty things,” I whisper, sounding dejected, and nothing like the woman that once promised to never take the type of shit he threw at me moments ago. Lucy is right, I need to find that girl again.

Cut out the waterworks, Nina.

“You think we can try this again? Start over,” he asks.

“I can’t have her around my son, Mason.” My voice wobbles and I turn my head off to the side, angry at myself for having zero control over my emotions.

His hand smooths over my cheek, tilting my head back to him. “I never touched her. I swear to you. There are things I want to tell you but it’s not the right time. Know that when it is, I will tell you.” His eyes hold so much conviction, I can’t help but think he’s telling the truth.

“What does that even mean, Mase?”

“You have to trust me.” His thumb skims across the underside of my lip and I pull away.

“That has to stop! You can’t touch me.”

He pockets his hands, running his tongue along the front of his teeth in annoyance. “Fine.”

“And, no turning up here early. We have the days and times planned out. We need to stick to that.”

He nods his head then stares at me, his brows pulled low and his set face hard and brooding. Goose bumps pebble along my arms and I shake my head. “Don’t look at me like—”

Ellis cries, cutting me off. “Well done. You woke the baby,” I accuse.

“Me?!” Mason blanches, his lip tipping up on one side.

I hurry down the corridor, briefly closing my eyes, as a soft smile pulls at my own lips. This could work. If I know that woman isn’t anywhere near my son, I could deal with this setup. I could see Mason and not want to punch him in the face or jump his bones, right? Switch off my emotions.

I scoop Ellis up into my arms, then grab his overnight bag, walking back out and into the living room.

“That wasn’t a nap.” Mason takes him from my arms and lifts him into the air, rubbing his head on his belly and making him laugh. His hair ends up an unruly mess with strands standing on end.

I watch them, my stomach flipping as I wonder about all the moments we’ve missed over the last eight months. “You can take him early if you want.”

“Is Mummy trying to get rid of us?” he asks Ellis in a weird dad voice that shouldn’t make him hotter but does.

“No, I just—”

“I know.” He smiles over at me. “We’ll get going. You okay?”

His brows dip low as I nod my head, my eyes welling up. “Yeah, I think I needed to let it all out. I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”

“I didn’t mean what I said,” he reiterates.

“I know.”

“You’ll be okay here? I know you hate it and…”

I wait for him to finish but he doesn’t, awkwardly scratching at his neck with his free hand. “You go, I’ll be fine.” I don’t tell him I planned to meet Joey tonight. Maybe we will both have to keep that part of our lives separate from each other.

“See you tomorrow, Mummy.”

“Bye.” I lean in and kiss Ellis, then stand at the door watching as they leave.

* * *

L&Mfitness suite is nothing like what I imagined it to be. Logan is… well, a bit of a meathead. He lives to lift weights and drink his protein shakes. So when he told me he had a new gym, I thought he meant something inconspicuous on a side street. Not a multi-levelled, glass-fronted building in the centre of London’s financial district.

I stand on the opposite side of the street and check the address one more time, just to be sure.

“Wowzers!” With a renewed spring in my step, I take off across the road and push into the building, my eyes greedily eating up every inch of the sprawling reception area. It could be a hotel. It’s not like anything I’ve ever seen before.

“Hi, can I help?”

I recognise the voice immediately, spinning around, I smile wide at Gemma just as realisation hits her. “Nina!” She stands, moving around the desk to pull me into a hug. “You’re a sight for sore eyes.”

“So are you, it’s been so long.” Gemma was always a regular at the gym—mostly because Henry wouldn’t allow her to work out anywhere else. He liked to keep her close.

“Are you joining? I’m sure Logan would cut you a deal.” She gives me a wink as she squeezes my hand in hers.

“Logan really owns this place? Logan Morgan, the one I used to employ?”

“Boy did good, huh!”

“Damn right he did.” I look around in awe, wondering how it’s possible. “How’s Henry?” I ask absentmindedly.

“Good, he works here too.”

“He does?” I snap my attention back to Gemma.

“Yep! It’s more like a family around here.”

“Anderson!” Logan calls, appearing from the stairs that wrap around the back wall. “Ready to meet your boss?”

“What is this place!” I smile as he steps up to me and throws his arm over my shoulder.

“You like it?”

“Logan, it’s incredible, truly. You’re doing well?”

“Business is booming.”

I shake my head, hardly believing it. I should’ve reached out sooner. I always loved working with the boys. Men naturally come with less drama—most of the time.

“Want a tour?” he asks me, clearly buzzing and proud.

“Yes! Show me.”

We take the stairs to the first floor, which is a colossal open space. It has everything from weight training equipment, a rig, and all the cardio equipment you can think of. I’m blown away that he could have accomplished so much in a year. Everything is top of the line and organised in a neat layout.

“It’s so busy!” I check my watch and notice it’s ten-thirty. “Where were all these people when we had the studio?”

Logan chuckles and takes off towards the office at the back of the gym. I follow him inside and sit down on one of the sofas. He takes a seat at the desk, watching me.

“How?”

He smiles as if he knew that question was coming. “I saw a gap in the market, had some help from Mum and Dad, got a business loan and made it happen.”

“I’m a little jealous, Logan. This place is… it’s incredible.”

“Thank you.” He nods his head once in agreement. “You wanna come help me run it?”

I laugh, tucking my legs up under myself on the chair. “You saw how terrible I was at running the studio, you seem to have things figured out here.”

He shrugs, resting his elbows on his knees. “I’m serious, Anderson. One of my PT’s just quit on me and he was my go-to guy after Henry. There’s not many people I trust to leave in charge here.”

“You want me to personal train?”

“It’s what I need right now. It will be just like old times.” He grins.

“I can’t PT!”

“Of course, you can! You used to.”

“No, I didn’t! I stood and read out the fitness plans you’d printed out for me.”

“Then we will do that,” he pops back at me. He’s really hell-bent on this.

“Is that the only job you have for me?” I cringe, feeling ungrateful.

He hesitates, then rubs his hands together. “For right now, but we can make anything work. Gemma could probably use some help downstairs on recep—”

“No!” I snap, sitting up a little straighter. “No, thank you, I will take the gym job.”

“Yeah?” He smiles.

“If you’ll have me.” I cringe, hunching my shoulders.

“Of course! You’ll love it here.”

“I hope so.”

I leave Logan’s office with a spring in my step, feeling like I might’ve just found something that will bring me that little bit closer to me again. I’ve missed the buzz that comes from being in this environment.

Logan told me to stick around and to get familiar with the place, which I happily obliged. I go to the changing rooms and internally scream at the over-the-top décor.

It’s more of a boutique hotel than a gym.

Cubicles with changing and shower facilities line the room, each one kitted out with the most beautiful bathroom suite. Skin and hair care products line the walls along with fresh fluffy towels. I have no doubt in my mind that Gemma played a massive part in designing this place, and when I spot the hairdryer and straighteners, it only confirms my thoughts.

I change quickly and use the lockers for my things. Jogging up the steps, I step into the gym and take my time, working on every piece of equipment until sweat is running off me and I feel the weight of the world slipping from my shoulders.

I’ve missed this.

* * *

“I’m not going,”Lucy huffs, pulling the dress over her head and throwing it to the ground.

“Stop being a queen. There must be something here,” Megan tells her.

“It’s alright for you! You look like a Greek goddess with your tanned skin and silky hair. I have roots, my skin’s looking all grey, and I have nothing to wear!”

“First world problems.” Scarlet chuckles, elbowing me as I put another coat of mascara on.

“Luce, you look beautiful. What was wrong with the red dress?” I ask, trying to console her in her meltdown. We’ve all been there.

“Too booby.”

“Miller wouldn’t mind.” Megan grins.

“I’m not going,” she reiterates.

It’s Elliot’s birthday tonight but Lucy has a date with Miller. We all know he isn’t the one—hell, I think even Luce knows that. But she always sticks it out, giving them a fighting chance before she cuts them loose.

“Suits me.” I shrug, putting my makeup back into my bag. “We could get takeaway and chill?” I ask hopefully. I’ve been dreading tonight all week. The idea of going out with Mason and the gang seems petrifying. It’s all too much too soon.

“You’re going.” Megan points at me. “We are all going! Lucy, get dressed, you look incredible in whatever you wear and Nina…” She looks over at me, guilt in her eyes. “Have another drink.”

I get up and pour myself another vodka, adding far more than necessary.

Here goes nothing.

* * *

Mase

“She’s pissed,”I bite out, draining the last of my whiskey as I lean back in my seat.

“Might just be the heels, mate,” says Lance, shrugging his shoulders when I glare at him as if he doesn’t really have a clue.

The girls just arrived sans Lucy–much to Elliot’s annoyance. They laugh their way over to us and I don’t miss Megan’s arm that’s wrapped tightly around Nina’s waist as she wobbles on her heels.

My palms itch to take her from Megan’s arms as they reach the table.

She looks around at us, scrunching her nose up and smiling. “Hey, my boys!”

“You’re pissed.” Lance laughs out loud, standing first to kiss her cheek.

Charlie and Elliot follow suit, while I say hi to Megan and Scarlet. I eventually turn to Nina, and she smiles shyly over at me. “Hey, Mase.”

My heart thrashes against my chest at that smile, and the fact she called me Mase and not Mason. It gets me right there, deep in my gut. I take my time as I lean forward, running my lips past her cheek to her jaw, placing a soft kiss just below her ear. “You look beautiful, Nina,” I whisper.

Our eyes meet and I watch as she swallows the lump in her throat. She isn’t as drunk as I first thought, but her eyes are still wide and glassy.

“I need a drink,” she blurts, breaking the moment. “Ell, what do you want to drink?”

She struts off to the bar and leans over the marble top, looking for someone to serve her, and I watch as her short black dress rises up her thighs. I couldn’t keep my feet in place if I wanted to. I stride to the bar and stand at her back.

“I’ll get these.” I signal to the barman.

“What? No. I can buy my friend a drink.” She frowns at me, looking over her shoulder. “What are you drinking, Ell?” she calls behind us, but Elliot doesn’t seem to hear her over the music.

“Four Macallans and a bottle of Dom Perignon vintage. Three glasses.”

“Two. PLEASE!” she corrects, giving me a drunken glare as she lowers her voice to a hushed whisper. “Could you be any showier?”

I drop my head to her ear, talking low and with warning. “It’s Montgomery’s birthday, don’t make this about us.”

My hand barely grazes her waist when she spins, slapping my hand away. “Exactly! Leave me alone, you giant butthead.” She snots as she chuckles at herself and then slips past me, leaving me to wait for the drinks. I ask for a third flute when the barman gives me two.

The girls are gone when I get back to the table. I place the champagne down and hand the boys their drinks.

“What’s going on with you two?” Charlie asks as I pass him his glass.

“Nothing.”

“Didn’t look like nothing,” Lance pipes up. “You gonna be on her ass all night?”

“I’m not on her ass now, am I? Dick.”

“I think she found someone to dance with anyway.”

My head snaps to Elliot and he grins up at me, clearly trying to wind me up. “Fuck you!” I spit, stretching out my neck.

She fucking rattles me.

“Just go get her, for fuck’s sake. You need to stuff her full, Lowell.”

Charlie and Lance chuckle, while I shake my head. “You’re a pig, you know that,” I tell him in disgust.

“We’re all thinking it.”

“She’ll come around, mate.” Charlie winks, lifting his whiskey to me before taking a sip.

“You think I want her, still?” I shake my head at them all, my pointer aimed at my chest. “I couldn’t give a fuck, but she’s the mother of my child and I won’t have her making a show of herself drunk. I’ll never trust the girl again. That ship sailed the day she left me.”

“Geez, you don’t hold no punches, do you?”

I turn to find the girls standing at my back. Nina glowers at me, before rolling her eyes and taking off towards the bar again.

“Really, Mason!” Scarlet scolds me. “What is wrong with you?”

“For fuck’s sake.” I pinch the bridge of my nose and go after her.

“Go away, please. I want to enjoy my night,” she tells me, her voice dripping with sarcasm as I step up next to her. “This is Elliot’s night, Mase. Let’s not make it about us.” She smiles sweetly, then turns back to the barman. “A vodka cranberry, and two shots of tequila, please.”

“You don’t have to be such a child. Maybe just once we could have a conversation without you running off.”

She scoffs. “Seriously, Mason, I just want to enjoy the evening. I don’t want to stand around and listen to you run me into the ground, but thanks for the thought. Here.” She passes me a shot. “Bottoms up, asshole!”

She tilts her head back and swallows the clear liquid down. A small drop leaks from her mouth and runs down her chin and throat. Her hand comes up to wipe her chin, then she looks at my shot. “You have a nice night.” She clashes her empty glass with mine, sending the contents everywhere and all over my hand.

“Cheers,” I mutter, drinking down the remnants of the shot. I watch as she takes her drinks and leaves, her hips swaying with each step she takes.

I’d be lying if I said I haven’t missed her fire.

* * *

The girls have beenon and off dancing all night, and they are nowhere to be seen when I spot Lucy making her way through the club. I check my watch and notice it’s still early. Catching Elliot’s eye, I nod my head in her direction. Their eyes meet across the room and Elliot stands. “Alright Luce?” he asks her as she reaches the table.

“Where’s Nina?” she asks, looking past Elliot at me.

I shrug.

Elliot leans in and whispers something in her ear that I can’t hear. She shakes her head, looking close to tears.

Sensing she needs a female, I go to the dance floor and search for Nina, spotting her on a podium wedged between Scarlet and Megan. Shaking my head, I step up to them and tap her leg.

“Fuck off!” She waves me off, smiling down at me. “I’m having fun and you’re ruining it.” She wobbles on her heels and starts to fall backwards grabbing on to the girls. They laugh amongst themselves as if it’s the funniest thing in the world.

“You’re going to have to get her down,” the bouncer tells me, pointing up at Nina.

“Come on.” I grab her at the waist and throw her over my shoulder, knowing it’s the only way to get her off the podium.

“Mason!” she shouts, her fist meeting my back once in annoyance.

I slide her down my body when we reach the side of the dance floor, my hands keeping her steady as she finds her feet again.

She glances up at me through her lashes with a look in her eye that I can’t quite decipher.

“Lucy just got here. Something’s up,” I tell her on autopilot, still stuck in our trance.

She blinks, snapping out of it as she looks off to the far side of the room where the boys are seated. Just as she goes to step away from me, I pull her back.

Her hand grips my bicep and I flex involuntary—maybe. Arousal sparks in her eyes and I watch as she fights with herself, her gaze flicking all over my face. “Not now,” she tells me.

* * *

Nina

I’m drunk.

Beyond drunk. But I feel fantastic. That is, until Mason pulls me from the dance floor and tells me Lucy’s here, seducing me with his damn face.

Brushing him off and taking some deep breaths, I make my way to our table, finding Lucy sitting across Elliot’s lap. I spy his hand resting across her legs, and my gaze tightens on them. Elliot is whispering something in her ear, and she is very clearly hanging off his every word.

“Luce,” I shout over the music. “You okay?”

She nods her head, giving me a sad smile. I frown, wondering what could have happened with Miller. It’s early, still. Something isn’t right, and the fact she is sitting on Elliot’s lap says a lot.

“Nina.” Lance taps my shoulder, handing me a drink.

“Thanks.”

“How many’s that?” Mason asks loudly in my ear.

I lean away from him, looking up into his dark eyes. “None of your business.”

He mumbles something I don’t catch, and it irks me. “What was that?” I snap.

“Nothing.”

“You two!” Charlie tsks. “Just don’t speak to each other. It’s like watching a pair of children.”

“He’s the child,” I say, thumbing over my shoulder as I move to sit with Charlie on the wingback chair.

“You okay?” he asks, grinning at me.

Using my straw, I stir the ice in my glass far more aggressively than necessary. “He pisses me off.”

“He didn’t mean what he said before.” He sobers as his words come out with complete sincerity.

“I’m getting fed up with hearing that. He called me a whore the other day.”

“Do you think he’d be acting the way he is if he didn’t care, or if he thought you were a whore?”

“This is him showing me he cares. Is that what you’re saying?” I sit square and sip my drink. “How did we ever work before? It’s like I can see all the bad bits now that I never saw before.”

“Rose-tinted glasses are a wonderful thing,” he murmurs, and I turn to look at him. Charlie is the quietest of the group, and I know that’s more to do with the things in his past than his personality. But I can’t help but think he has a lot more to say sometimes.

“Well, I definitely don’t have them on now.” I snicker out a laugh but end up snorting through my nose.

Charlie shakes his head, smiling over at Mason who is watching us both. “You wanna know what I think?” he asks with a smirk.

“Hit me with it, Charles.”

“I think… not if, but when you and Mason get back together, you’ll have gotten through so much hurt and overcome all the bullshit that it will make you untouchable, you’ll be extraordinary.”

My brows lift in surprise, not expecting that to come out of his mouth. “You have high hopes.”

“I normally know my shit, Nina. You should listen to me.” He winks, leading me to conclude that he must be drunk too.

“Hmm, I don’t know, maybe. I am a sucker for a sale and those rose-tinted glasses go pretty cheap these days.”

“What?” he asks, throwing his head back, laughing.

“You know what I mean.” I wave him off.

Shaking his head, he leans forwards and goes to stand. “One day, you’ll find your peace. You just have to go through the shit first.”

“Philosopher Aldridge.” I salute him.

He stands and goes to the bar, and I make myself comfortable in the large chair. My eyes go to Lucy and Elliot, cozied up on the seat opposite me. I often wonder if they’ll ever end up together. Lucy is adamant they won’t, and I get it. On paper, it wouldn’t work. She’s all about the happy ever after and running off into the sunset—she isn’t into the playboys. But the way she fits with Elliot is different. The bond they have as friends is special. Maybe that’s what’s more important to them. Maybe they work because they are friends. Who am I to judge them?

My gaze drifts to Mason, and I catch him watching me, although I knew that already. I can always feel when his eyes are on me.

If only we could be friends. We definitely couldn’t work like Elliot and Luce do. I’d be too friendly. I mean, if I was sitting on Mase’s lap right now and he was whispering in my ear, I’d have no doubt in my mind he’d be hard, and if he wasn’t it would be my mission to make him.

His eyes narrow, as if he knows what I’m thinking.

Yeah, he would definitely be hard. The man’s a sex fiend.

Taking my straw into my mouth, I sip my drink, moving my lips to draw over the tip. Mason does a little two-step, taking a gulp of whiskey as he watches me over the rim of his glass.

I smile, feeling my dimple pop on my cheek. Peeking my tongue out, I flick it across the tip, then glide it into my mouth, sucking up my drink before sliding it out slowly. I repeat the process, keeping my eyes locked on his intense dark ones.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Megan snaps, grabbing the straw from my mouth and throwing it to the floor. Her face is screwed up in question. “Filthy whore.”

I hide my grin in my glass, shrugging as she falls into the seat with me.

“What’s got you over here deep throating a straw? Do we need to find you a penis?” She giggles.

The vodka burns my throat and I choke, turning to look at her with wide eyes. “No! I was just messing.”

“Nina,” Mason interrupts, and my back goes straight, my face heating as if I just got caught doing something I shouldn’t. “A word.” He steps away from us, seemingly expecting me to follow.

“Do not suck that man’s penis,” she warns.

“Megan!” I laugh.

“You’ll only regret it.”

I wouldn’t. But that might be the drink talking.

“Nina.” She grasps my arm. “Don’t leave with him tonight, okay? Not when you’re this drunk.”

“I’m not stupid, Megs, I wouldn’t leave with him.”

She nods despite her frown and then lets me go.

Mason’s standing by the entrance, talking to a bouncer when I catch up with him. I step up beside him and wait while he finishes, stealing the moment to watch him whilst he’s distracted. The way his jaw works as he listens to what the bouncer is saying, and the stance he takes—there’s no doubt who’s in charge here. His shoulders are square and full, his shirt stretching over his chest seamlessly. My gaze drops to his hands. They are so big, his fingers long, and veins that pulsate beneath his tanned skin. What is it about big hands?

“Mase,” I interrupt impatiently.

“Sorry, mate,” he cuts off the bouncer, turning to look down at me. His face transforms into a frown instantly. “Don’t give me that fucking look,” he spits at me.

“What look?” I blink.

“You know what look.” Grabbing my hand, he pulls me from the club and towards the waiting taxis. “We’re leaving.”

“Mase!”

* * *

“I didn’t wantto leave though, Mason! You pulled me out of there because I gave you…” I hold my hands up, air quoting, “a look.”

“You did, you wanted me to fuck you.” He follows me into my apartment, and I don’t stop him. I’m too mad at him to even acknowledge what a bad idea it is.

“Can you even hear yourself right now?! What planet are you on?”

I take off down the corridor to my room. “Damn asshole. There was no look,” I mutter to myself, pulling off my heel and tossing it off to the side.

“You know what I’m talking about. You can plead ignorance, but I know that look.”

His phone starts to ring, and I turn my back, wobbling in my drunken state as I try to remove my other shoe. “I took her home,” he says into the phone.

“Against my will!” I add before muttering, “Asshole.”

“She’s fine. I’ll send Vinny now.”

“Send him here first.” I spin, my heel still on and not coming off with ease. “Why are you even here?”

“Talk to you later, Aldridge.” He hangs up the phone and watches me. Shaking his head.

“Well?” I ask.

“I—” His phone starts to ring again. “Mega—” He rolls his eyes and I smile, knowing she will give him fuck. “Yes. She is fine.”

Leaning down, I manage to get the shoe off. I flex my toes and drop my head back, relishing in the relief. I don’t know why we wear them.

I need a pint of water and my bed, and maybe a shower. Yes, definitely a shower. I already know I will feel like the earth’s ending tomorrow. Without thinking, I grasp my dress at my waist and pull it down over my strapless bra, shimmying it over my hips.

“Uhh, yeah okay, bye.” Mason reminds me of his presence, and I look up to see him shoving his phone into his pocket. His eyes are wild with something carnal, but they hold anger too.

“Why are you angry?” I ask.

“What are you doing?” His jaw clenches tight as his stare drops away and to the floor.

“Once upon a time this wouldn’t have bothered you, Mason.” I throw my arms out at my sides.

He shakes his head, making me rage when he doesn’t lift his head to look at me. “Things are a little different now, don’t you think?”

My throat burns with a deep ache. “Then why are you here?”

His eyes finally lift to me and I’m momentarily paralysed in place.

I swallow thickly, my heart hammering in my chest. Letting my dress fall, I step out of it and then kick it to the side. Reaching around, I unhook my bra letting it fall to the floor. Mason leans against the doorframe, his legs crossed at the ankle, his muscular arms straining in his black shirt. He’s everything I remember him to be, and yet I crave his touch so I can be reminded of his love. Because I miss this man’s love above all else.

If we ever did anything right, it was the way we loved each other.

He doesn’t move, doesn’t blink. He just stands and watches me with his troubled eyes. And those brows, low and dark.

“Do I look different to you now?” I ask, popping an arched brow.

“Nina,” he warns.

“What? You don’t like the marks your son left me? They aren’t going anywhere, Mase.” I walk towards him, forcing myself to not cover my body. His eyes narrow as he looks down his nose at me.

“You have no idea,” he rasps.

I lick my lips. “No?”

Something passes between us, the air in the room becoming electric.

He shakes his head, not taking his eyes from my face as he pushes off the doorframe and walks over to my chest of drawers. “It’s late.” He pulls out a sweatshirt and comes back to me, slipping it over my head and pulling the hem down past my thighs. “Get in the bed, Nina.”

I swallow thickly as I look up at him, my chest aching with the look in his eyes. Nodding my head, I turn and climb into bed, sliding my pillow to the centre before laying my head down. I watch as Mason settles back into the chair beside Ellis’s cot, his eyes trained on me.

“Mase…” I pause, not really knowing what I want to say. “I’m—”

He shakes his head, tipping his chin up. “Go to sleep.”