Grand Love by JC Hawke

14

Nina

It’s been two weeks.Two weeks since he kissed me, and you’d think it never happened. He comes to his PT sessions and basically does his own thing. I give him some lip and he gives it back, but then he goes home. He doesn’t offer me lifts, he doesn’t linger when he drops or picks up Ellis. I’d call him out on it, but truthfully, I’m just glad that we can be in the same room without going at one another.

With Ellis at Mason’s for the weekend, I’ve found myself cleaning the apartment from top to toe. I’ve barely slept and when five a.m. rolls around, I climb out of my bed and slip on my sweats. I’d run alone, but I know Joey has been avoiding me and I want to get him out of his apartment. He’d be a total recluse if I let him.

“Joe!” I whisper, shaking his shoulder.

“Hmmm.”

“Wake up!” I shove him harder.

He groans, rolling away from me. “Please, go away.”

“No, get up, we are running. I’ll get you water.”

“Coffee.”

“You can’t run with coffee.”

“I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.” I smile, slipping off to his kitchen and filling a water bottle. “You’ve been avoiding me,” I say loud enough so he can hear me.

“No, I haven’t.” Joey appears in the kitchen doorway in a sleepy state. His hair is wild and flops down onto his forehead, and he is in only a pair of black boxers. He is skinnier than he should be for his size, skinnier than when I first met him. I always worry about him. He has no family here to look out for him after his mum passed away a few years ago, and his brother lives in the states. From what I can gather, he blames Joey for his mother’s death. Joey will rarely talk about it and I’m okay with that. Although I know he can look after himself, he’s happy being independent and I can relate to that. But it doesn’t mean it doesn’t get lonely. Add in his mental health issues and it’s enough to have me checking in on him.

We all need someone in life.

“You have but I forgive you. I did kick you out for Mason the last time you came over.”

He smiles up at me. “You did, I was pissed about that actually,” he says it as if he is only now remembering and I instantly know we are okay. “But that’s not why I was avoiding you. I really have been busy.”

“Are you eating enough?” I ask casually, tightening up the bottle top. “You’ve not been up to mine for tea in the last few weeks.”

I’m smothering him and I can’t help it. It’s as if when Ellis isn’t here I look for someone to cling onto.

“Nina, it’s five forty-five. You aren’t lecturing me on food right now. We’re either running or sleeping.”

“Sorry, I’ve been up for hours,” I complain, turning and heading for the door. “Get dressed. I’m going to stretch.”

* * *

The benefitof not being able to sleep in has to be experiencing the city before it rises. Delivery men hustle to unload the trucks, clanking and clanging in their steel toecap boots, but otherwise, in the small little side streets, the city sleeps. With the cold morning air, not many fools venture out on the gleaming, icy pavements.

“I think I have a studio,” I blurt out, needing to run the idea by someone. I should speak to Lucy and Megan, but if I fail, they will smother me in their pity and I can’t stand it. I know Joey deals with knock backs all the time in the photography industry, so I feel a little more comfortable telling him. He won’t expect big things.

“Yeah? Where?”

“Above Logan’s gym.”

“Really? That’s great! Are you going to start teaching again?” We stop at a fountain, catching our breaths.

“Not yet. It needs some love. There’s painting to do and equipment to clear. The floors are a mess too. But it has potential.”

“When was the last time you danced?”

My heart seems to wake with his words, catching up with the rest of my body and beating a little harder than it did moments ago. “It was a few days after the studio sold, at the penthouse.”

“Shit. It’s been what? Over a year. You need to get back into it, throw yourself in, else you never will.”

“Joey, I told you about this because I trust you not to push me. Dancing is my passion, you know that, and I will dance again. I just need some time.”

“I know, I’m sorry.” He pulls me under his arm, walking us to the gates. “You want some help at the gym?”

“No, I need to do it myself.” Working on the studio will be good for me, it will give me something to do when Mason has Ellis. I thought about going this morning, but I feel like I should check with Logan before I just turn up.

And what’s the rush?

“To be honest, I couldn’t find the time. It’s been crazy since I sold my latest prints. I have people booking for next year already. It’s mind blowing to think it’s finally taking off.”

I smile up at him, proud of my friend and the hard work he has poured into the last year of his business. He is a phenomenal photographer. “You’ll have your pictures hung up in—”

“In The National Art gallery one day. You’re an idiot, you know that?” He chuckles, releasing me from under his arm and pushing me away.

I always tell him he will make it big one day. He doesn’t believe in himself like I do.

“You never know, all it takes is one image.”

He looks down his nose at me, tipping his chin and smirking. “You’d be the one.”

“What?” I giggle, starting to jog again.

“If I were to make it big, you’d be my masterpiece.”

I laugh loudly, the pigeons scattering off as I scare them. “As if!”

“The pictures of you in the studio, they’re some of the best I’ve ever taken. It’s a damn shame you don’t let me sell them.” He grins down at me, letting me know he is messing with me.

Once upon a time, I’d have had no problem with Joey selling the pictures he took. But when I lost the studio, they seemed to become more personal.

The image of me looking into the camera, it reminded me of Mason. And in nearly every shot stands his mother’s beloved piano. They remind me of something I don’t hold on to anymore, so keeping them in my grasp and only my grasp seems important to me. “It doesn’t seem right to have my face on a wall. I love the pictures and I’m glad I got you that distinction.”

He rolls his eyes. “Oh, because it was all you.”

“But I wouldn’t want them plastered on random people’s walls. It seems… weird.”

“Did you know Mason offered me money for them?”

I falter but keep moving. “What?”

Joey doesn’t answer me right away, and his face is a mask of indifference.

“Mason offer—”

“You know, forget it.” He waves me off, picking up the pace.

“No. What you just said! Mason offered you money for the photos?”

Joey runs his hand through his hair, looking conflicted. “Yeah.” He nods.

My lungs burn but I don’t stop. “When?”

“God, I don’t know.”

“Before or after I found out I was pregnant?”

He frowns, slowing to a walk. I welcome the change of pace. My legs feel like jelly. “After, it was just before you moved into the apartment.”

“What!” I feel my brows crease, my mind tripping out.

“I didn’t sell them,” he assures me, as if that’s what’s important.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You didn’t speak about him at the time. I didn’t think you’d want to know.”

He’s probably right. I wouldn’t have wanted to know. Things were tough after I left Mason. But now I do know, and it leaves me with so many questions.

Mason made out he was angry with me. That he didn’t want me after I ran out on him. But why would he try to buy my photos after I left if that was the case?

I stop dead in my tracks as a thought comes to me.

“How much?” I ask.

Joey drops his head, knowing how important the answer is to me.

“How much did he offer for them, Joe?”

“More than I will probably make in a lifetime off all my other photos.”

“Son of a bitch!” I seethe. “How much? I want to know.”

He rolls his eyes. “I wouldn’t let him have them and he wouldn’t give up. He didn’t go in high at first, but every time I refused, he upped the offer.”

I shake my head, waiting.

“One point two.”

“One point two?” I frown, shaking my head, confused.

“Yeah.”

“One point two,” I repeat, willing my brain to function.

“Million, Nina. One point two million pounds.”

Bile rises in my throat.

Why does he have to do it? Some women would be humbled. But me? It makes me feel sick to my stomach.

“I shouldn’t have told you. I didn’t want to upset you, Nina.”

“Why didn’t you take it?”

He stares through me, thinking about it for a second.

“The pictures meant more.” He shrugs.

I nod, the irony breaking my heart in two. If only Mason could see that. He’s so desensitised to his own wealth, he doesn’t understand the value of the things money will never buy.

“I’m sorry, that he put you in that position, Joey.”

He shrugs again. “At first, I was pulling my hair out, literally. I almost gave them up at £20K.” His honesty makes me smile. “But then I felt powerful, to turn down that amount of money, especially Mason’s money.” He grins. “It felt good.”

“I can imagine. And I bet he didn’t like it much either.” I smile despite my annoyance.

“Nope. I had to tell him to leave. He probably wouldn’t have stopped at one point two.”

“He’s a damn idiot.” Hearing the colossal amount of money Mason can just throw around like pocket change makes the fire in my gut burn like a raging furnace. “You should’ve sold them.” I look up at him, knowing how much even a fraction of that money would benefit him.

“Probably.” He laughs. “You’re going to confront him about it aren’t you.”

“Yep.”

* * *

It’s beenthe longest day and as Elliot pulls up outside my apartment in his Aston Martin, I yawn wide, not feeling the evening ahead at all.

Scarlet has requested us all at the estate tonight. She wants to finalise the plans for the ball. With only a week to go before the event, she’s been crazy busy working on the small details. We have helped her through every bump she has found herself at so far and I know that tonight will be no different. Elliot, Lance, and Charlie have been heavily involved and a massive help. We all agreed not to tell Mason about the ball until a few days before. He should be planning it with us, but we all know he wouldn’t, and Scarlet refuses to give him the opportunity to disappoint her.

Lucy and Megan are already in the back of the car when I climb in, and I can barely see them past a sea of garment bags. “Really? Did you bring the whole shop, Luce?”

“If Elliot had listened and brought the Audi, we wouldn’t have a problem. Would we Elliot.”

“You don’t get that purr in the Audi, baby. I know you love it.” He revs the engine, making me and Megan chuckle.

Elliot’s seat is jolted from behind, but he doesn’t acknowledge it. He just looks at me with a smile and gives me a wink.

“I think we should call Mason, you know, he’s been much happier in the office this week. He told me you kissed him by the way.” Elliot gives me a pointed look, waiting for me to do up my seat belt, and pulls out onto the road.

“What?” Megan’s head pops out from the back seat.

“You never said!” Lucy bolts forward.

“I didn’t kiss him! He kissed me. And it wasn’t even a proper kiss.” Not by mine and Mason’s normal standards anyway.

“You kissed?” Lucy asks, sounding hopeful.

“No! Barely. And it was nearly two weeks ago, so calm down.”

“I heard it got pretty hot and heavy. Lowell said he had to jack off in the car after he left. Had your tits out and all in the bathroom.”

“Fuck!” Megan exclaims.

“Ell!” I shout, my stomach knotting at that snippet of information. “You’re winding it up and making it worse.”

“What? I’m just saying what he said.” He has a stupid look on his face, telling me he knows exactly what he’s doing.

“Yeah, Nina, Mason doesn’t hold out on his boys.” Lucy glares at me over the top of the bags.

I take a deep inhale and blow it out through my nose, knowing I need to explain. “He got all over the top about Joey.”

“Shock.” Elliot sniggers.

“He got himself all worked up, I didn’t do a thing. Then he stayed to bathe Ellis. Your mum turned up, Luce, she thought Mason was getting handsy with me.”

“No!” she says, shocked.

“Yep. I told Mason to bathe Ellis to get him out of the situation so I could explain, and then he ended up in the bath with him. He had to dry his clothes, so he stayed for dinner.”

“You’re getting back together!” Lucy smiles.

“What? No!”

“When and where did the kiss happen?” Megan asks, not missing a thing.

“What does it matter?” Elliot snorts.

“It matters,” Lucy tells him.

“In the laundry room.”

The girls laugh in the back, and I roll my eyes at Elliot. “Thanks, asshole.”

“You’re welcome, Pix.” He taps the steering wheel, looking over at me while the girls buzz around in the back. “He seems much happier.”

“It doesn’t mean anything, Ell. We’re both confused and so much has happened.”

“Exactly. You have been through a lot. In my time, the best relationships always do.”

“Nina, I’d advise against taking relationship advice from London’s most notorious manwhore.” Lucy laughs, falling back into her seat.

I look at her then Elliot, noticing his jaw clenched and face red. “You didn’t seem to mind this morning, babe? Hmm? Whilst you were grinding your ass on my semi.”

I direct my wide eyes to Luce who has now sunk down in the seat and is hidden by the bags.

Elliot huffs, shaking his head as he looks into the rearview mirror. “Touché, Luce. Tou-fucking-ché.”

* * *

Lowerwick is litup when we arrive, looking every bit the grand estate that it is. I’ve been coming here for the last year and when I arrive, it feels a little bit like home.

“This place always reminds me of Christmas. Can you imagine living in a house like this?” Megan voices, climbing from the car.

“It’s not a house, it’s a mansion,” Lucy says, piling up garment bags on Elliot’s outstretched arms.

Inside, Scarlet has an array of cocktails laid out for us to try. We pretend it’s research for the ball but we all know it’s not.

Lucy has sent Lance, Charlie, and Elliot upstairs to try on the suits she brought over for them. She had one put back for Mason and will get Elliot to deliver it on Friday. Hopefully, everything works out and we pull the whole thing off. A lot has been planned in under a month and I’m so proud of Scarlet and what she has achieved, it’s going to be an incredible evening.

“So, I have food to be served at seven, the band is starting at eight thirty, and the auction will begin at nine thirty in their break. I’ll need you girls ready for that a little while before.”

“Auction?” I blanch.

Scarlet looks up from the piece of paper she’s reading from. “Yeah, Lucy didn’t tell you?”

I turn to Luce who is wide-eyed with guilt and gulping her cocktail. “Luce?”

“It’s for a good cause?” She dabs at her lips.

“What kind of auction?” I ask, my stomach tightening with what my intuition is telling me.

“Megan is hosting, I’m dealing with the money, so Luce said the two of you would donate a date.”

“A date?” I snap, staring at Lucy.

“Sorry! It’s just one night and we can get Dad to bid, and Megan will take what he offers. Won’t you, Meg!” She elbows her in the side, but Megan just smiles impishly.

“No!” Scarlet asserts. “You have to put yourself out there. Come on, girls.”

“Why don’t you do it then? I can deal with the money!” I beg her.

She cringes, her hands crunching the paper slightly. “Uhhh, no, sorry.”

“Scar!” I cry.

“You know my brother will buy you!”

My heart sinks and my body tenses. I never stopped to consider what Mason would think of an auction. He would hate it, and he would buy me, there’s no doubt in my mind, and with what Joey told me today, I can only imagine how much deeper he would drive the dagger.

“I don’t have a lot in donations yet, it would mean so much if you could do this, Nina.”

“Oh god…”

Her lips thin and she shrugs unapologetically. “Thanks, babe.”

My lip tips up as she starts to chuckle. “I’ll think about it. No promises.”

“You are doing it—”

“What do you think, ladies?” Lance announces, sauntering into the room with Charlie and Elliot hot on his heels.