Grand Love by JC Hawke
25
Nina
“Hey.”I smile as I drop onto the sofa next to Megan at the Elm. I pluck out the menu and open it.
“Hey,” Lucy says sceptically. “You’ve got a spring in your step this morning. Everything okay? You didn’t call me back last night and then missed our chat.”
“I turned off my phone once Mason and Ellis came home. I had nearly four hundred WhatsApp messages this morning.” I eye them all with a look that tells them I think they’re idiots. Or at least that’s what I’m trying to portray.
Scarlet looks at me with a soft smile. “Are you okay, though? Mason was worried when he left last night.”
This morning in the shower I broke down in tears to Mason. I don’t know why he accepted my reasoning, but he did. I don’t feel good about cutting off Joey. Simple. I don’t want to care, but I do. His brother has just died and I feel like the worst friend in the world turning my back on him. “Something happened with Joey when I went to check on him yesterday.”
“Like what?” Megan asks.
I swallow, feeling stupid. Like Mason, the girls all warned me that Joey had feelings for me, which I wasn’t blind to. I just didn’t ever expect him to cross the line. “He tried to kiss me.”
“Wow,” Lucy mutters.
“What the fuck, Nina,” Megan snaps. “Were you going to tell us? Does Mason know?” she gasps.
“Mason knows. That’s why I went to his last night. I knew I had to tell him.”
“Are you okay?” Lucy asks.
I shrug, biting my cheek to stop my eyes from welling. “Yes and no. Mason was amazing, and I couldn’t ask for the situation to be better with him right now.”
“Oh, I love this.” Lucy grins. “I feel proud of you both already. Tell me more.”
“I’m not going to see Joey for a while.”
She rolls her lips, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I actually think that’s a good idea. He’s been at the centre of some of your arguments with Mason these last couple months.”
“I know. And it was my choice, but I worry so much about him, girls.”
“Because of his brother?” Lucy asks.
I nod. “He isn’t right. It scares me to think he’s in that apartment on his own at the best of times but now that this has happened it scares me. I found him in the bath on Sunday. He was asleep, and I had to wake him. He’s always been Joey, you know. I’ve never seen how his illness affects him when it’s bad, but he isn’t acting himself and I don’t know if that’s because of his brother or because he isn’t taking his medication.”
“He has bipolar, right?”
“Schizophrenia,” I correct her.
“He’ll be okay, babe,” Lucy tells me, placing a hand on mine.
“I hope so.”
“I know this is hurting you, Nina,” Megan says, sipping her coffee, “but I think this will be a good thing. You and Mason made big steps this past month. You have a chance to get your family back here.”
“I know.”
“And maybe it will mean Joey makes new friendships. He seems stuck on you.”
“I think Joey cares. Maybe too much at times but he isn’t a bad person.”
“So you and Mason are okay?”
“Yes, but he wants to take things slow.” I smile down at my lap. “We’re going to date.”
“Slow?” Megan laughs. “Mate, you can’t fuck him yesterday then be like... Oh, we’re taking it slow today.”
The girls all chuckle in agreement with her.
“You know what I mean. I already know he won’t last five minutes.” I laugh. “We’re just not going as fast as last time.”
“Definitely… like condoms this time, right?” Scarlet jokes and I chuck a salt packet at her head. “But, Nina, if you want me to, I can check in on Joey? Maybe send over some bereavement leaflets or something? Just to check in so you don’t have to stress.”
“You’d do that?” I ask.
“Of course! I get what it’s like to lose someone you love. Maybe it will be good coming from me?”
“If you could, that would be amazing, Scarlet. Thank you.”
I relax in my seat and look over at Lucy who is watching me in thought. She gives me a soft wink and smile. It’s going to be okay. For the first time in a long time, things seem to be falling into place.
* * *
Mase
After the dayI’ve had, I almost forgo my evening workout. But knowing Nina is working, and after her leaving me before the sun was even up, I drag myself up the steps of L&M at ten past five for my evening PT session. She’s working with a client when I reach the top step, so I go to the treadmill and start with a jog. I watch her as she helps the lady with her weights, taking off the larger one and dropping down a size. She is reassuring her; I can tell by the way she’s looking at her.
Sometimes I wonder how she is as caring and selfless as she is. It pisses me off and makes me love her all in one big eye roll. The way she has to be there for her friends, up and leaving if one of them needs her. Like Joey yesterday. Or the way she used to help her mother, when she spent her life never helping herself. Another thing I need to fix.
Nina has the same support from her friends that she gives out, but she doesn’t have the family. After my weekend with Scarlet, it makes me angry that she hasn’t ever had what I have. All because of her parents.
“Hey, you!” Nina bounces up next to me, a smile playing on her sexy lips. “You look wrecked.” She frowns, placing her hands on her hips.
I shake my head, smiling down at her. “I have this wench that kept me up all Saturday night.”
“Hmm, is she hot?” She waggles her brows at me.
“She’s alright.” A bright smile spreads across her face, making my heart somersault in my chest. “Are you okay now, after this morning?”
She nods her head, her lip turning up on one side. “Can I show you something?”
The excitement in her eyes makes me grin, and I come to a stop on the treadmill. “Of course.”
* * *
Nina
I haven’t hada lot of time to think about my dancing recently, but after the weekend and the way things are going with Mase, I’d like to think it’s something I could go back to soon. The girls from my old studio have all moved onto other companies, so I wouldn’t have it for classes. Or I wouldn’t expect it to take off right away anyway—it’s been too long. But to just dance again, feel the music like I used to—for the first time in a long time I feel excited about it.
Linking my fingers through Mason’s, I walk us through the gym and over to the door that leads to the room above the gym. I haven’t told anyone but Joey about the space yet, and other than Logan, no one else knows about it.
“What’s up there?” Mason asks, looking up the steps in wonder.
“It’s a surprise!” I jog up the steps, not feeling afraid of the small dark space with Mason at my back. “Logan told me I could do what I want with it.” I push open the door, letting the light hit my face. I smile wide as he steps past me. I don’t tell him what it is. He’ll know what’s in my head. If anything, he’ll already be plotting how he can make it everything I want it to be—and I have to be okay with that.
I walk to the window to look out across the city, giving Mason a minute to take in the room.
“You have plans for it?” he asks, sliding his hands around my waist as he stands behind me, his nose brushing my temple.
A smile pulls at my lips. I continue to look out the floor-to-ceiling window. “Eventually, maybe when Ellis is a little older.” I run my hands over his where they rest over my stomach. “I already feel like I’m away from him too often. I miss him so much after the weekend.”
“It was just one weekend, and it was well worth it.” His lips nip at my jaw, his hand dusting the underside of my breast. “We won’t be spending weekends apart anymore, angel.”
I twist my head to look at him. “We won’t?” I ask hopefully.
Pulling me back into him, he buries his face in my neck, sucking on the skin there. “You smell edible.” I can feel his erection in his gym shorts, and I instinctively push back against him.
His hand dips into my leggings, sliding his fingers through my heat. “I need you. I need you so fucking much.”
“Mase,” my hoarse whimper pulls me back to the now and I grasp his arm. “What are you doing?” I pull on his arm, removing his hand from my underwear as I spin to face him.
He groans, dropping his mouth back to my neck once I’m facing him.
“Mason!” I laugh. “You said no sex.”
His beautiful, confused face pops back up. “Come on, Pix.” He looks down at his gym shorts then back to me.
My smile is instant. Leaning in he places a kiss on my dimple. “You said we had to date. No more sex until we get this right between us.”
“And you choose this point in our relationship to actually take heed?” he sniggers, licking at his full lips.
“This will be good for us. They were your words.”
“I got it wrong.” He pinches my nipple.
“Well, it makes sense. I think we should try.”
“Nina.” He takes hold of my hips.
“Mason.” I smile, brushing his lips with my own.
“Baby,” he pleads.
Our kiss is messy and broken from our smiles. “It may be a silly rule, Mr Lowell.” I breathe out against his open mouth. “But… I think we should stick to it.”
His hands slide into the back of my tights, and he palms my ass. I giggle to myself as a deep sigh leaves him. “Fine. But our first date is tonight.”
“I can’t tonight. I need to speak to Joey.” I run my fingers through the hair at the base of his neck. “I need to explain things to him. I just left yesterday, and I need to tell him not to come to mine again. I need to get my key.”
Mason’s jaw clenches, his body growing tighter.
“Mase, he was my friend. I need him to know why I’m doing this.”
“You’ll come over after?”
I watch him, his face still hard. I love this man. So damn much. “I will.”
He nods, looking down his nose at me. “I need you to consider something for me… about Jasmine.”
“What’s that?” I ask.
“We will speak about it tonight—”
“On our date.” I grin, excited.
“Yeah, on our date.” He places a soft kiss on my lips. “Are you going to PT me or should I find something else for you to work on?” He grasps my hand and covers his still hard cock.
I chuckle into his chest. “You’re quite simply the most impossible man I’ve ever met.”
* * *
I’ve been tryingto think of the right thing to say to Joey all day. Nothing seems to sound right, or fair, yet he tried to kiss me. He crossed the line and now I have to fix that before our friendship is completely ruined.
When he doesn’t answer, I pull out my set of keys and unlock the door.
“Joey?” I call.
The wheels of his desk chair grate across the wood floor, sliding until he appears at his bedroom door.
“Hi,” he mutters, running his hand through his hair and twisting his neck.
I’m surprised to find him so bright eyed. Especially after how I found him yesterday. “Hi… how are you today?” I ask, not going any farther into the room and putting off bringing up the real reason for being here. “You seem better.”
“Fine,” he says, quickly. “Working.”
I nod. “Of course, you have prints going out soon, right?”
“No. I cancelled them. I have something else I’m working on.”
I openly frown. Because what the hell? “You cancelled them?”
“Yeah. Do you want a drink?” His eyes blink rapidly and he shakes his head in frustration.
Joey stands from his chair, crossing to the kitchen and getting a drink.
“No.” I swallow the lump in my throat. Why is he acting like nothing happened? “I need to talk to you, Joey.”
“Yeah?”
I stand next to him at the sink, trying to figure out what to say. “I need to take a step back from our friendship.” My eyes burn with the words. “I need to focus on my family for a while.”
“Family?” he asks, nodding.
He thinks I’m being insensitive. “Just for a while, I’ll still be around. I just won’t be dropping in.”
“I don’t need you dropping in.” He gives me an awkward look that makes me frown. “Did you want something else?” He looks past me, flexing his fists before pointing past me. I follow his line of sight to his bedroom. “I got work.”
There’s a calm that comes over him. It’s as if he hasn’t even heard me. He was so upset yesterday and now he’s like this. “Yeah, that was it. I should have texted before coming, sorry.”
He slips past me, disappearing into his room.
I go to the door and open it, but something stops me from leaving.
Backtracking, I go to his room and walk to his computer chair. He’s working on an image on the screen. It isn’t clear what it is, but it holds every colour you could think of. “Joey.”
“Hmm.”
“I’m going to go now.” I pull the card with Vinny’s number that he gave me last year from my purse and slide it onto the desktop. “Will you call this number if you need anything?”
He looks at it, then to me. His eyes are emotionless, piercing straight through me. “Okay.”
Turning away from me, he starts working on the image again, as if I’m not here. My eyes blur with tears and I quickly lean down and wrap my arms around his body, resting my head on his. This doesn’t feel right. But I don’t say anything more. Standing straight and wiping my eyes, I leave his apartment, knowing I won’t be back for a while.
* * *
Vinny arrives shortlyafter seven to pick me and Ellis up. When I got back from Joey’s, Maggie was waiting at mine and I ended up telling her everything. She thinks I’ve made the right decision, which coming from Maggie means a lot to me. She agrees that Scarlet should go and check in with him in a couple days. It will make me feel better and I really do think it will be good for him to get help and support after the news about his brother.
“Hello, love,” Vinny says, rounding the bonnet and taking the two bags I had packed for me and Ellis. “You’re both staying at the penthouse tonight?” he observes.
I nod, taking a deep breath in. I need to try and push my emotions aside regarding Joey. I have my own life to fix. “Yeah, I’m going to stay in the spare room. But I think it’s a good step.” I bounce on the balls of my feet. “This is progress, Vin.”
He chuckles, placing a hand on my back and guiding me towards the car. “The spare room.” He shakes his head.
“Yes, the spare room.”
He gives me an amused look. Is it so hard to believe that we can stay away from each other? We did it for over a year.
“Come on, Mason will be waiting for you.”
We are in the car and on the way to the penthouse when a thought comes to me. “Vinny, you must have my father’s name, right?”
I watch as his hands tighten on the steering wheel. “Yes.”
“I would like it if possible, and his address if you have it?” I know he does.
He pauses for a second and I narrow my gaze on him. “I think you should speak to Mason—”
“No,” I tell him. “I’m asking you for a reason. I want you to come with me.”
His brows shoot up as he turns to look at me. “Come with you?”
“To meet him. Mason won’t have me go alone, and I don’t want him to come. I’ll tell him that I’m going and that you’ll take me.”
“What’s brought this on, love?” he asks.
I look at my hands and contemplate lying before thinking better of it. “Everything with Jasmine...”
Vinny nods his head. “She doesn’t know him.”
I flick my eyes to him. That surprises me.
“She doesn’t have contact with her mother either. Hasn’t since she left school. She doesn’t even know who her father is.”
Why did I think it would’ve been different for her? “What is she like?”
“A lot like you.”
My eyes lift to his face, a wide smile stretched across it. “You have a new favourite now?” I say, messing with him.
“That’s impossible.” He winks.
I rest my head back on the seat. My eyes close momentarily, giving myself a minute to think about what I want. “Do you think I should meet him?”
“Your father?”
“Hmm,” I mumble.
When he doesn’t answer right away, I open my eyes and search his face. It’s hard and I get a feeling that he knows a lot more than necessary about the man.
“That’s up to you, Nina.”