At First Hate by K.A. Linde

New York City

March 9, 2013

New York City was loud.

It shouldn’t have been that different than Boston, but somehow, it was. And I never wanted to leave.

It had taken a miracle for me to get my entire spring break off. The lab had only wanted to give me the first weekend, but Derek had insisted we’d be gone the whole time. I never took time off, and so I’d asked for what I wanted, and they’d granted it, albeit begrudgingly. Now, I was here with him, and things were unreal.

Derek’s interview had been this morning. I’d been all alone in his friend’s house, which was actually an enormous two-story penthouse on top of Percy Towers.

I hadn’t yet met Camden Percy, but the house was larger than life. I’d never seen this much luxury in my life. Not even Derek’s house back home was this fancy. I’d been tempted to look up the Percy net worth and just decided it was probably in the nine- or ten-digit range.

I’d tried not to gape as we took the private elevator up to the top floor. He had a private elevator. My mind was boggled. I wasn’t sure how many guest bedrooms he had, but I’d taken a separate one from Derek. We were some undefined thing that I was terrified to see come crashing down. As much as he’d said that I shouldn’t complicate things, I couldn’t stop the fear that this was going to all fall apart again. So, we hadn’t taken another step forward. As much as I was sure it was killing him.

It took me longer than normal to get dressed to go out. I’d second-guessed what to bring with me. Misty and I weren’t the same size, but she’d rummaged through her sister’s closet and brought me back some designer labels. I’d felt ridiculous, accepting them, but apparently, Misty knew the Camden Percys of the world.

When I stepped out of the bedroom with my hair down in waves, my makeup fresh, bright red lipstick painting my lips, and a black designer dress with a square neck that made my boobs look amazing—if I did say so myself—Derek’s response was enough to make the effort worth it. His eyes widened to saucers, and he gaped for a few seconds.

“Wow, Marley,” he said finally.

I laughed. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Wow.”

At the last second, I’d grabbed the scarf Derek had gotten me for Christmas and brought it with me. It was still cold in the city, and something would be better than nothing.

“Final touches,” I said with a grin as I wound it around my neck.

He smirked. “It’s perfect.”

We headed to the first floor of the penthouse, and I got my first look at the incomparable Camden Percy. He was hot in a controlled possible Mafia boss sort of way. Derek was all Southern charm. No matter how much time he spent at Harvard, that was who he was. Camden was raw power. It radiated off of him. His eyes and hair as dark as night, he wore a power suit that even I—who knew nothing of fashion—could tell had been custom-tailored, holding a crystal glass of scotch. He was intimidating and maybe a little bit terrifying.

I straightened my shoulders and held my hand out. “Nice to finally meet you.”

He slipped his hand into mine and shook once. “You too. Ballentine speaks highly of you.” His eyes darted to the scarf. “This season, if I’m not mistaken?”

“Uh, yes?” It came out like a question.

He glanced at Derek, offering him his hand. “Your doing, I presume.”

Derek laughed. “I have good taste.”

“That’s why I like you.” Camden drained his drink and then nodded to the elevator. “Come on. Party is waiting.”

The party ended up being at Club 360, a nightclub on the top of Percy Tower. It was a rooftop bar overlooking the entirety of New York City. A bar was stretched along one side with VIP booths against the opposite wall. The dance floor took up the majority of the space in the middle.

Amelia Ballentine was waiting for us at the entrance. She was radiant in a shimmery black-and-silver number. She was skinnier than I’d ever seen her before in my life. And it was only accentuated by her long ponytail high on the top of her head and the red-bottomed high heels on her feet. She looked imperious and oh-so New York City fashion.

Camden’s eyebrows rose at the sight of her. I didn’t blame him. Or her when she caught sight of him. Camden made his introduction, and she met him with a Ballentine smirk on her lips.

“Amelia!” I said, crushing her to me as I got past Camden. “I’m so glad we could meet up.”

“You’re at Club 360. I practically begged Derek to let me come along,” she said into my ear.

“How’s Parsons?”

“Almost done.”

“And then what?”

She shrugged. “I’ve had a ton of interviews with designers. We’ll see where it takes me!”

I loved her optimism. It was definitely born from knowing that no matter what happened, she’d land on her feet.

She fingered the scarf at my neck and winked at Derek. “I have impeccable taste, no? Hermès, darling.”

I blinked at her. Even I had heard of Hermès. In fact, we’d passed their shiny window display on Madison Avenue earlier today.

I turned slowly to face Derek. “How much did this scarf cost?”

He laughed softly. “More than a dollar.”

“More like five hundred,” Amelia said.

My eyes widened in horror. “I’ve been wearing it into the lab!”

Derek tried to hold back his mirth. “And that’s what I like about you.”

Camden just eyed our display and gestured for us to follow him inside.

A man in a suit approached him as soon as we entered, and he escorted us to the only remaining empty booth. “Your table, Mr. Percy. If there’s anything else I can do for you, let me know.”

“Thank you,” Camden said, slipping him cash and striding into the booth.

A bartender stepped up immediately and began pouring drinks for the table. Derek ordered me a sidecar before I could get a word in, and then tequila shots were on the table. We downed a round before more people appeared, crashing into the booth. I didn’t remember any of their names, just that they were all beautiful.

I stood on my tiptoes and said into Derek’s ear, “Do they breed people differently here?”

He snorted. “I felt the same way when I first got here.”

I took a sip from my sidecar and watched everything happening all around us. I was on a rooftop bar in Manhattan in a private booth with the owner. This was so not my life. And yet it was fun to pretend. Camden’s best friend, Court, seemed friendlier than most, talking me up for an hour and dragging me out onto the dance floor.

I could feel Derek’s eyes on us, and then suddenly, he was there, cutting in as the music continued its jam. Court began dancing with one of the other women who had taken over the booth, nonplussed by Derek’s intervention. Camden appeared a few minutes later with Amelia.

For a split second, the entire room seemed to still as another group of people entered. Every one of them more beautiful than the next. But the woman at the center, she could have been a venomous Snow White. Tall with pale legs for literal days. Her dark hair and makeup professionally done. Her lips the deepest, darkest red, nearly matching the blood-colored dress. She had her hand on a man who looked so much like Court that I almost did a double take. They nearly could have been twins.

“Wow,” I whispered. “Who is that?”

Camden stood at my side when I said it and replied darkly, “That is Katherine Van Pelt.”

“Is she a model?” I asked.

“Yes,” Amelia gushed.

“The resident ice queen of the Upper East Side,” Camden spat out.

“I watched her walk at Fashion Week this year. She was stunning,” Amelia said. Her eyes were wide with envy and maybe a little hero worship.

“And the guy with her? Court’s… brother?”

Camden’s frown deepened. “Penn Kensington. He goes to Harvard for his PhD as well,” he said, his voice like ice.

“You’re friends, I see,” I said with a laugh.

“More like enemies.”

He turned his back on the supermodel and her friends, dragging Amelia back into the dance. It was hard to tear my eyes away from the lot of them. They moved together like the fucking Cullens. In a way, that probably would have made me feel inadequate if I had cared what people thought about me.

Once the tension in the room burst like a bubble, everyone went back to dancing. The crew held court opposite Camden and his friends, and after another sidecar, I forgot to care. Just let Derek grind against me on the dance floor. I leaned back against his chest, my ass pressed his pelvis. He dragged my arms up over my head, still moving with me. I’d had no idea that he was a good dancer. We’d never danced before. Certainly nothing like this. Where we were both hot and sticky. Our bodies pushed together, a simulation of everything we hadn’t been doing over the last couple months. And now, with him tight against me, it was all I could think about.

I’d had no reason to trust Derek when we got together in college. I’d known exactly who he was. But since Halloween, he’d shown me a different version of himself. He’d made the effort. We’d been friends. Was I stupid for wanting more? Or stupid for resisting? I couldn’t take it back if I chose wrong.

His lips brushed against my ear. “Mars.” I shivered as he flicked his tongue against the lobe. “Your body feels incredible.” His words heated me through. He grasped my hips, drawing me harder against him before pushing his hands down the front of my dress and across my legs. “You want this.”

And he was right. He could drag one finger between my legs to find out just how bad I wanted it.

His voice was demanding and sensual. “Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll stop.”

“Derek,” I groaned.

“Because I can’t lie anymore.”

I whirled in his arms, looking up into those hazel eyes filled with lust. His arms came back around me, settling on my ass. My own hands looped into the curl of his hair at the base of his neck.

Some part of me said to let go, to not worry about repercussions, but I’d been so careful. So fucking careful the last couple months to not give my heart over to this man. He had the power to break me, and I didn’t want to be the dumb girl who got hurt again. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

“Why?” I asked, my voice cracking.

His brow furrowed. “Why what?”

“Why did you leave the first time?” I asked the question that had been haunting me all these years. “Why?”

“I already told you.”

“No, you didn’t. You said you were an idiot. You said that it was a mistake and you missed me. Those are excuses, not a reason. We’d had a great time, and then you were gone. You practically called me stupid for thinking it was more.”

He sighed and nodded. “You’re right. I did those things but not why you think. It’s going to sound stupid.”

“How so?”

“Because I liked you.”

I blinked at him. “That’s not—”

He held up a hand. “I liked you, Marley. Not just liked you. I was falling head over heels. I’d never felt that way about anyone before in my entire life. I dated. I’d been with other people. Girls never mattered to me. Then, here you were, crashing into my life over a feud, and I couldn’t get you out of my mind.”

“But…” I began helplessly.

“So, I ran scared.” I met those hazel eyes and saw the sincerity there. “I didn’t want to be tied down. I thought that if I acted like an asshole, then you’d let me go. It wasn’t until I saw you again at Halloween that I realized how incredibly fucked I was.” His hand came to cup my jaw. “No one else is you, Mars. No one else will ever be you.”

My world tipped at those words. I’d thought that he treated me just like every other girl. And here he was saying the opposite. My brain and body couldn’t seem to process the information.

“How do I know you won’t run scared again?”

“I’m still here, aren’t I? I made a mistake, but I’m not scared of this with you anymore, Marley.” He pressed one soft kiss to my lips. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Something sparked in my chest at those words. Something I’d been holding back all this time. Too afraid of the pain he’d caused me to see it too clearly. I’d wanted his body and enjoyed his friendship and felt something budding. But I was way past that now. I was in deep with him. And I didn’t want to come back from the precipice. I wanted to jump again. Only the unknown had been holding me back. The unknown was gone.

I raised onto my tiptoes and crushed our mouths together. He kissed me like he’d been waiting his entire life to do so. It was rough and passionate and full of pent-up need.

Derek took my hand without another word and pulled me toward the exit. He texted Amelia to let her know that we were leaving. She sent back a wink emoji. Derek laughed as we took the elevator down to the penthouse. We had two rooms, but Derek drew me into his, kicking the door closed behind him and thudding my back against it.

I gasped, and his mouth covered mine. Months. It had been months of want and need. Months of waiting. Months where I was certain this would never, ever happen again. Not ever.

But he’d stuck by me. He’d waited. He’d been patient. He’d proven himself.

And now, we couldn’t scramble out of our clothes fast enough. There would be time to take things slow and reacquaint ourselves with the other’s body, but that wasn’t happening tonight.

My hands went to his waistband, unbuttoning his pants and shoving them off of his hips. He hoisted up my dress, and reached for my underwear. I gasped as the material ripped in his hands.

“Derek!”

He grinned devilishly. “I’m impatient.”

But I couldn’t even be mad. Not when he gripped me by the backs of the thighs and slammed me into the door a second time. We were both impatient. A yawning need taking over all of our movements. I grasped for his cock in the dark, drawing him to me. He touched the tip against my opening.

“I should…” he fumbled.

“I’m on birth control.”

“You’re sure?”

“Derek, please,” I whispered.

He didn’t need to be told twice. He plunged forward, taking me hard and fast up against the door of his bedroom. His cock hit deep inside of me as he braced me up with his strong arms.

“More,” I gasped.

“Fuck,” was his only response.

He carried me across the room, laying me out flat in the bed. I stretched my arms out toward him, and he obliged by sliding back inside of me. We both groaned as we fit together.

“God, your pussy is so fucking wet.” He pulled out and slammed back into me. “So wet and tight for me.”

I pulled him down to me. Our lips meeting roughly. “More,” I begged.

“Needy little thing,” he teased. “Tell me what you want.”

“You, Derek. I want all of you.”

“I’m all yours. All yours.”

He grasped my hand in his, forcing it up over my head and then did the same with the other. Then, he drove into me with abandon. I saw stars as everything burst around me into oblivion. I came uncontrollably. A cry escaping my lips as my pussy clenched in tight pulses around his cock. He drove home one more time, hitting so deep that another gasp escaped my lips.

He finished in long shuddering movements. Then, he finally released my hands and kissed my swollen lips. “I missed you, Mars.”

“You’ve ruined me,” I said with a half-smile on my lips.

“Good,” he said, all cocky.

“And I thought my first kiss was the life-ruiner. The sex is…”

“Your first kiss?” He kissed along my jaw. “What do you mean?”

I flushed under his attention. I’d never planned to tell him this.

“Oh, now, I have to know. Tell me.” He kissed across my collarbone and to my neck. I squirmed under him, but he didn’t give an inch. “Come on. You can’t dangle something like that out there.”

I sighed. “You were my first kiss.”

He pulled back to stare at me. Clearly, that was not the answer he’d expected. “On Halloween?”

I nodded.

“I didn’t know that.”

“I didn’t exactly advertise it.”

“No wonder you were so mad at me.”

I laughed. “You make it so easy.”

He pressed another firm kiss to my lips. “Can’t say I’m upset I was your first. I want all the rest of your firsts.”

“I might allow that.”

My eyes slid shut as he held me tight in his arms. It was the most relaxed I’d been in years. Everything had been so pent-up and tense. Now, here in his arms, with nothing to do but enjoy myself, I found myself slipping toward sleep.

“Derek,” I whispered in the silence.

“Hmm?”

“Don’t leave in the morning.”

He sighed softly. “I’m never leaving you again.”