Her Pack by Tamara White
Chapter Forty-Four
Dad lets goof me after the longest time and I turn to face the mother I've never met. She smiles at me, her eyes filled with nothing but kindness and love. Maybe a touch of regret?
"Did you know?" Is the first thing I ask.
Because I have to understand if she knew this was my fate all along. If what Malina said was true, then it stands to reasons she would have had a chance at ending our line with my mother too. Maybe even my grandmother?
"I didn't until a few days before my death. By then it wasn't just me who would need to die, but you too. I couldn't kill my child. If you were in my shoes, I doubt you could have either.” Her eyes are filled with pain as she takes a hesitant step toward me, reaching out to take my hands in hers. "I can never apologize enough for what you have been through and the decision you now have to make. But I want you to understand, I have never been prouder of the woman you have become. Everything that has been thrown at you and you are still the same strong girl who rushed into the world and consumed our hearts with love. I love you so much, Danielle. Regardless of what decision you make."
I don't know what to say. She may be my mother, but I don't know her. Not the way I know my father. The words coming from her lips are simply that, words. They may hold meaning for her. For me though, it's not as meaningful as if it were to come from my dad. I don't say anything to her though because I don't want to hurt her feelings. She loves me, and I guess in a way I love her too. She brought me into this world and sacrificed her life for me when I was a mere baby. It's hard to describe the actual feelings I have towards her though.
Dad must see the internal struggle I'm having because he joins us, wrapping an arm around each of us, his eyes watering with unshed tears. "I've lived so long and I never thought I would get to witness such a thing. My two girls. Together again."
"Dad..." I trail off, my own eyes filling with tears. It's my fault he's dead. Yes, he's here with my mom, but he should be back there with me. He shouldn't have been poisoned in the first place. "I'm sorry, Dad. It's all my fault you're dead. I'm so sorry. We should have just stayed hidden and never gone back to the packs."
"Shhh," he murmurs softly, stroking my back softly.
My mother does the same, tears spilling from her eyes at my pain. The comfort from her is foreign yet soothing enough that I relax into her and let myself cry. I have hated myself ever since Dad died from drinking the silver that Luke had intended for me.
"Hey, you need to stop apologizing. Better yet, you need to stop thinking that what happened to anyone was your fault. The fact is you're not to blame. Luke and the people who follow him are the only ones at fault for all the pain and death people have been subjected to. If it weren't for the things they had done, then people would be living one hell of a better life than they are."
"I know that, but it's my fault I didn't just kill him when I had the chance. I let them imprison him rather than taking him out of the equation."
"Not choosing death is nothing to be ashamed of, sweetie." My mom is giving me a soft smile. "That you chose to spare him, he should count himself lucky. A person who is so quick to choose convenience rather than life is not someone who is meant to rule. You not only showed your people the type of woman you are, but the type of ruler you could be."
I stare at her, unsure if it was worth it at this stage. Especially when Luke has taken so much. "I just wish you were back there with me. To see me grow as a person. To watch me develop with my mates. All the things a normal girl is supposed to want. Instead, you're dead, and I have to make a choice. Kill myself or keep the rest of my kind cursed until someone else comes along." I let loose a frustrated sigh. This is all too much.
How on earth am I meant to go back to my mates knowing of the choice I have to make? Someone is bound to figure out what is going on and ask me to tell them. I can't lie to them again, can I? I mean it’s bad enough I didn't tell them about this.
Malina suddenly appears, glancing from me to my parents. "Time's up. You have to return now."
"But wait, can't I have a bit longer," I plead, not wanting to leave my parents behind. There are still so many things I haven't said. I haven't asked my Dad about Lia. I haven't asked my Mom about what the seer actually told her about me. I haven't asked whether she’s happy. Whether they both are. Because that's all that really matters to me.
That they are happy with where they are now.
"I know you wish you had more time, but that is not how this works. I've given you all I could allow, and even then, it's too much." Malina sighs when the first tear falls down my cheek. "One minute. Now say your goodbyes."
Dad hugs me tight, pressing a kiss to my head. "I love you so much, Dani. I have never been prouder of you. Remember that no matter what decision you make, you are one of the strongest women to come from your line. You'll know in your heart what the right choice is when the time comes."
"Thanks Dad," I breathe out, wishing we could have longer. Wishing I could bring him back with me.
Dad lets me go so my mom can hug me tight. She wraps me in a grip so tight that it feels like I can't breathe. "You are stronger than any of the past Queens, my sweet girl. You are strong enough to make this choice, but I want you to promise me that whatever choice you do make, you will not let it haunt you. You will embrace it fully." She pauses, a soft sob escaping her. "If I could go back and make the choice before you were ever born, I would. I wish more than anything I could take this decision away from you. It guts me that you’re being forced to bear the weight of our future on your shoulders. Just know that no matter what choice you make, you are my daughter, and I will always love you."
My mom is ripped from me and Malina moves to stand between us. Dad smiles over at me. "We're always watching over you, Dani. Never forget that."
They disappear leaving me standing alone with Malina. She offers me a small smile. "I hope your present made up for what I unloaded onto you. It's time to go back now, though. It has begun." She bows softly to me. "It was an honor to meet you, Danielle. I look forward to the day we meet again."
"No, the honor was all mine," I say, bowing back just as deeply. "Thank you for everything you have told me. I will try to do you proud. I will save our kind."
One way or another, I will save them. If my death is the only option, then it’s the right choice to make. I hope.
She smiles at me, then clicks her fingers. "Goodbye, Alpha Queen." Malina starts to fade from sight until she's no longer here with me. I'm all alone in this water filled bubble. How on earth do I get back?
As soon as I think the thought, a heavy pressure starts to build in my chest. It becomes difficult to breathe and warmth starts to encase me. I can feel my body in the spring. I close my eyes to prepare for what is about to happen, hoping I’m not still underwater.
Hands suddenly grip my cheeks, and my eyes flare wide. I’m unsure whether I’m imagining this or not. James is mouthing to me, but I can't hear him through the rush of water in my ears. James leans in closer, so his mouth is pressed right to my ear.
My eyes widen as he repeats what it was he was saying. The moment his touch is gone, I’m thrown back to reality, drowning in a small spring.