Brutal Boxer by Naomi Porter

5

Aspen

Finally, alone with my thoughts, I got dressed after the first shower I’d had since leaving Casso’s gold tower. I’d been too afraid to stop anywhere for the night, terrified he’d somehow find me and drag me back to my lavish cell. When I stopped for gas, I peed and brushed my teeth. Tony had only given me a thousand dollars to get to San Antonio. He wouldn’t give me more, so I couldn’t afford to renege on meeting him. I was sure he was furious with me… if Casso hadn’t killed him for letting me escape.

Before guilt consumed me, I shook thoughts of Tony’s inevitable death out of my head. I didn’t feel sorry for him. He’d known Casso held me against my will, watched on the security cameras as he repeatedly took from me in the bedroom. Tony could’ve saved me but didn’t. The pervert could rot in hell for all I cared.

I rubbed my stomach, tears pricking my eyes. The stress I’d been under the last few days likely caused my miscarriage, according to Patch. But I didn’t think so. I’d been under extreme duress well before the day I got the positive pregnancy test. Adding the baby into the mix had me terrified of what our future would look like in the gilded cage Casso Cambell held us in. All my energy and thoughts were on getting out, surviving, and being free.

Did I really believe freedom was possible?

Did I really believe Casso would let me live after leaving him?

No. I didn’t believe any of it.

My heart rate picked up. He’ll find me.

I buried my face in my hands. What had I done? Desperation clouded my good sense. It was stupid to come to Jill. She’d be the first person Casso would think of once he knew I wasn’t in Texas. If Tony told Casso he was meeting me in San Antonio, Casso would go there first. No telling how long he’d search for me there. Days? Maybe weeks? Not enough time for me to get a new life.

I pressed my hand to my chest, my throat constricting as terror washed over me. Eventually, he’d come to Minnesota. How could I put my best friend in danger?

You idiot.

I needed to get as far away from Jill and this club as possible.

Slipping on my riding boots, I ran through various options to rectify the impossible situation I was in. Not one eased my worries. I had little money. None of my own. Casso had monitored my accounts since I moved in with him. There was nothing I could do he didn’t know about.

I could try to convince Storm to help me get a fake passport and give me some money to flee to another country. Not Canada. Casso had strong ties there.

Mexico was too close for comfort.

Europe was massive. Perhaps I could get lost in the countryside. Dye my hair a different color and chop it off. Hell, shave it off if needed.

Anything to assume a new identity.

Be free.

A sobbed choked me at the thought of living a life I chose. Doing as I pleased seemed like a fantasy. An unreachable, beautiful dream.

You’re such a fool. Cass thinks you’re pregnant with his baby. He’ll die searching under every rock until he finds you.

My arms prickled, knowing the truth. The only way to be free from Casso’s clutches was if he were dead. I couldn’t stay here. I wouldn’t endanger Jill and this group of people who had only been kind to me. I thought of Madeline and her husband Storm. Jill had confirmed they were expecting their first child. I would never endanger a sweet baby.

Zach is here too.

As much as I hated him, I’d never wish him any harm.

I only had one choice: leave the country.

Jill would never go for it, but she didn’t have a say in my life. Nobody did. I just prayed Storm would help me get away. Surely he didn’t want Casso Campbell heading for his club on a rampage.

Casso wouldn’t be kind and reasonable. He’d destroy first and ask questions later.

I inhaled a deep, cleansing breath. My mind was made up on what I needed to do.

After I finished getting dressed, I headed upstairs to seek out Jill. She’d told me the kitchen was at the top of the stairs, and I’d find her there.

I peeked my head around the corner to see who might be in the area. I knew it couldn’t have been Zach. He had his fighting event today.

A shiver worked through me. I didn’t like anything violent. Not sports or movies. I was a peaceful, harmonious kind of person. I only wanted to be happy.

But over the last year, I’d learned what a dark, violent world I lived in. More than ever, I sought to have my own haven, a sublime little nugget of space to call my own, removed from torment, imprisonment, and death. A place I could lie in a patch of wildflowers beneath the sun, absorbing the warmth and tranquility. And at night, I’d get lost in the inky sky filled with stars.

Was that too much to ask for?

It was weird how my imagination took me back to a time when my life was simple and glorious. Filled with love, hope, and dreams. Where I blew the fluff of a dandelion into the breeze and made a wish on a shooting star. A time when the love of a dark-haired boy with the most startling light blue eyes was all I needed.

I didn’t want to remember that time in my life. I’d left it behind after grieving for years. Then I’d put myself back together. Changed the course of my life to prove I didn’t need him to be happy. I’d earned a degree in fashion merchandising while Jill studied fashion design.

After we graduated, she’d altered our plans to open our own boutique, moving to Minnesota to be near her brother. Remembering that day still crushed me. So many hopes and dreams had already been stripped from the future I’d desired. I understood wanting to be near the only family she had left after her parent’s death, but it still hurt.

It took me a couple of years to find my way without Jill. After that blow, I floundered, trying to find a job I loved. Many times, I struggled to open myself up to others, afraid they’d leave me like Zach and Jill. This made me build a fortress around my heart. I’d kept friendships casual. Stuck to a three-date limit.

Until Casso Campbell swept me off my feet one evening when I rode the ferry on the Puget Sound, from downtown Seattle to Bainbridge Island. The breathtaking ride was my entertainment when I felt lonely. It killed several hours of my pathetically boring life…

“May I?” a strong, confident voice asked.

I lifted my head, nearly choking on my spit. Towering over me was a handsome man who could’ve been on the cover of GQ Magazine. Clean cut, golden tan, eyes so piercing I couldn’t tell if they were navy, a deep brown, or black in the evening light. I trailed my gaze down his length, admiring his black suit and spotless Hugo Boss Derby shoes.

He cleared his throat, jerking my attention back to his godlike face.

With a curious arch of his brow, he flicked his cunning eyes to the spot on the bench beside me. “May I?”

“Oh, um, yes.” I flashed a smile as my face warmed. “Yes, of course, you can,” I stammered like an idiot.

“Thank you. I’ve been admiring you for the last half an hour. You’re stunning.”

For sure, my face turned candy-apple red. Who talked that way within ten seconds of meeting someone?

I crossed my leg over my knee and clasped my hands together. Nobody appeared to be paying attention to this odd encounter. “That’s a bit forward, sir.”

Sir? Where did that come from? It must’ve been his four-thousand-dollar suit making me stupid. Fashion was my passion. I knew all the high-end brands. This man was dressed like a million bucks, which meant he probably had billions burning a hole in his bank account.

He laughed heartily. “Sir? Please, call me Casso.”

I bit the inside of my cheek. His name was as regal as his attire. “Okay, Casso. I’m Aspen.” I extended my hand formally.

He took it and kissed the top, melting me on the spot. “It’s a pleasure, Aspen.”

After we’d debarked the ferry that day, Casso and I strolled together through Pike Place Market. He bought me dinner, kissed me sweetly under the Space Needle. For the next year, I was exceedingly happy.

But Casso drastically changed when a crucial deal fell through. The fury he unleashed in his study that night terrified me. I’d heard him tell Tony he wanted his mother’s family murdered. “Kill every last one of those motherfuckers!” he had yelled in a fit of rage. The sinister way he spoke turned my blood cold. Alarms went off, warning me to flee his penthouse.

How could I have been so stupid to tell him I needed space? I should’ve taken off before he could imprison me.

“Asp?” Jill’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts. “Come in, babe.” She reached for my hand. “How was your shower?”

“Good, thanks.” My face burned as I came out of the doorway. Several unfamiliar people stared at me. I felt exposed and vulnerable, but I straightened my spine and smiled just the same. Hiding my weaknesses and fears were imperative with Casso. Since I didn’t know anyone here, I put on the same kind of show.

“Everyone, this is Aspen, my bestie. Asp, meet the girls.” Jill pointed to a pretty blonde. “That’s Sugar. Beside her is Tina.”

The two women waved, eyeing me intently.

“And at the island are Amber and Misty.”

“Hi,” they said in unison.

“Hello.” I nodded, making eye contact with each woman.

“Let’s get you settled at a table.” Jill ushered me along.

My heart raced as unease swept through me. I wasn’t sure what that was about, but I sat in the chair Jill pulled out at one of two large round tables that sat eight. The island had six barstools, two occupied by Amber and Misty. They’d swiveled around to face me.

Did everyone have to stare like I was a freakshow?

Had Jill told them I’d been handcuffed to the bed? Sexually assaulted by a vile, dangerous man who was on the hunt for me? I tugged the sleeve of the sweatshirt I wore to cover the tops of my hands so no one saw the scars on my wrists.

I took in the vast kitchen with industrial-sized appliances. How many people ate here regularly? I’d never seen anything like this before. I was curious what all went on in this clubhouse. Earlier, I’d discovered seven additional rooms downstairs and a communal bathroom with several stalls and three showers. Clearly, a lot of people lived here.

“Can I get you something to drink, hon? We have everything. You name it.” the woman named Tina said. She had kind, understanding eyes and looked older than Jill and me.

I smiled. “Coffee would be wonderful with a little cream, please.” I placed my hand on my stomach, fighting the sting of tears behind my eyes. I hadn’t had a sip of coffee since I got the positive pregnancy test. Casso wouldn’t allow it. Not even decaf.

“Coming right up.”

Jill returned with a bowl and sandwich. “This is Sugar’s famous chicken noodle soup. It’ll heal all that ails you. And your favorite, turkey and provolone, on sourdough with honey mustard and sprouts.”

“You remembered.”

“I sure did.” Jill sat beside me, taking my hand. “Relax, Asp. You’re safe here.”

I nodded. “I know. I’m okay.”

“No you’re not, babe. But you will be.” She studied me, a hint of guilt in her light blue eyes.

“Mind if I join you?” Sugar interrupted Jill’s observations.

“Yes, please do.” I hoped Jill would keep her questions to herself with someone else at the table, but I didn’t know. We’d been apart for so many years.

Tina set a mug in front of me, then took the available chair next to me. She had a safe, peaceful aura about her. I sensed something familiar, but I wasn’t sure what it could be. I’d certainly never seen her before. I’d remember such a beautiful face and kind spirit.

“Thank you.” I lifted the mug to my nose and inhaled the delicious aroma. What was it about the smell of coffee comforting the soul? I set the cup down to let the hot brew cool so I didn’t scald my tongue.

“Aspen,” Sugar began, “whatever you need, we’ll get it for you. Don’t be afraid to ask.” She glanced at Jill and Tina. “We’re old ladies in the club. We have some clout. And Madeline, who I believe you met last night, she’s the prez’s woman. She’s a force to be reckoned with and will go to the mat for you.”

“Anything, honey. We’ll help you as best we can.” Tina surprised me, lacing her fingers with mine. A pang hit me in the heart.

Jill patted my leg. “We got your back, babe.”

Those damn tears breached the gate, making my lip tremble at their words. For so long, I had nobody to help me. No friends. No family in Seattle to rely on. The outpouring of support these women offered overwhelmed me.

“Thank you.” I covered my mouth to hold back a sob.

Tina stroked the top of my other hand. I turned toward her and found her eyes filled with tears like mine. We stared at each other for a long moment as if reading each other’s minds. Searching her olive-green eyes, I saw her suffering. Her pain and loss. I knew nothing about this woman, and yet, I felt as if we’d been through the same hell and escaped.

She nodded as if confirming my thoughts. I didn’t want to believe she’d lost a baby like me. It hurt my heart too much. I felt it in my bones there was more to Tina.

Had she been trapped like me? Held against her will and broken free?

I sucked in a ragged breath, unable to hold myself together, wholly exposed to these women and vulnerable.

Tina’s arm went around my shoulders. “Come here, honey.” Her tears fell as she embraced me. “It’s going to be okay. You’re safe now.”

I cried in the arms of a stranger, feeling cared for and protected for the first time in years.

Gathering my emotions, I pulled back, exhaling a deep breath. “Wow. Okay.” I dried my nose on a napkin, lifting my cup to sip it. I needed to distract myself after that strange moment with Tina.

“Don’t be embarrassed.” Sugar had a sweetness about her, but I also sensed a fierceness. “When the men get back, they’ll figure everything out.”

My heart jerked in my chest. I set my cup down. “About that… the men, I mean. I think it’s best if I just leave. I’ve thought about this a lot, and I can’t put any of you at risk. Cass won’t stop until he has me in his clutches. All I need is a fake passport and maybe a little money.”

Jill gasped. “Asp, no. I won’t let you go on the run.”

I tilted my head. “Jill—”

“She’s right, honey.” Tina took my hand. “You’re safer here with dozens of burly men to protect you.”

“No, you don’t understand. Cass will destroy everything and everyone in his path who tries to keep him from me. I can’t ask you to do that. Please help me leave.”

“You didn’t ask,” a loud voice came. “I won’t let you leave.”

I whipped my head in the direction of the voice to see who it was. Storm stood in the doorway of the kitchen. His wife, Madeline, was at his side. Behind them, walking into the room was the redhead from last night and the scary-looking biker who rescued me. Two more men followed.

Storm’s intense gray eyes locked on mine. I held my breath, fearing what he might do. He can make Casso’s captivity look like a palace. I shuddered, imagining a dungeon of torture at the hand of these strangers.

He sat beside Sugar, patting his lap for Madeline. She took her spot as if it were totally normal, but to me, it was strange that she didn’t sit in the chair next to him. The other couple and bikers hung back, observing.

Could I crawl under a rock and never come out again?

“You can’t leave,” Storm told me in an unyielding tone.

“So you’re going to handcuff me to a bed? Or maybe a wall?” I shot back. I was so damn tired of being controlled by men.

“I’d prefer not to,” he grunted.

Madeline sighed. “He’s teasing.”

I darted my eyes from her to Storm. “He doesn’t look amused. I don’t take threats lightly.”

“He would never hurt a woman,” Madeline assured, but I didn’t believe her. Every man could harm a woman.

“Right. Well, as far as I’m concerned, this is America. It’s supposed to be the land of the free. I’ve been a caged animal for too long. I appreciate your hospitality for the night. But I won’t stay another day and lead Cass to your doorstep, Mr. Storm.”

He smirked. “It’s just Storm or Prez.”

Every woman in the room giggled.

“Whatever.” I waved him off. “You’ll just have to lock me up, Storm. Because I am leaving here. With or without your approval.” I stood, done with this conversation.

“Sit down, Snow,” he growled.

I glared at the animal, my heart pounding against my ribs.

Jill tugged the hem of my sweatshirt. “Asp, just give him a chance.”

My gaze didn’t leave Storm. “My name is Aspen. If you want me to respond to you or show you respect, you’ll forget you ever heard the name Snow. She doesn’t exist.”

Storm’s eyes narrowed. The room was so quiet you could hear a leaf land on the table.

“Sit down, Aspen. And for the record, it is not my intention to hurt you or hold you against your will. But I have people in my club who care about you, so it’s my job to make sure you’re safe.”

“What people?” I hissed in annoyance. How could his wife be with him? He might be drop-dead gorgeous and hulking, but he had this Terminator vibe about him like Arnold Schwarzenegger in all those movies. Like he ruled the roost. I guessed if he was the prez of the club, he did control everything.

Shit. I’m in trouble all over again. Me and my goddamn mouth.

“Um, excuse me. Best friend, right here.” Jill tapped her chest.

“And I care about you,” Tina said next. Her soft voice deflated my fight.

I dropped down into the chair and lowered my gaze. I didn’t know what to do, but Jill was right. She cared about me. Loved me. I was sure she’d do anything within her power to protect me.

“Fine. I’ll listen to what you have to say, but that doesn’t mean I’ll follow it,” I told Storm honestly.

“Fair enough. Church is at seven.” He kissed Madeline’s cheek, helping her up. She sat in his chair as he left.

I turned to Jill. “What’s church?”

“A meeting the members in the club have,” she said.

“So why did he tell me like I was supposed to be there?”

“Because you have to be there,” Madeline replied. “It’s your life in danger. You know Casso better than anyone. Storm and his brothers will want to know everything you can tell them. I held him off as best I could from interrogating you earlier. My man is all out of patience now.” She grimaced.

“Eat up, babe.” Jill moved the bowl of soup in front of me.

I quietly ate my meal, surrounded by more people than I’d seen in over a year. Overwhelm followed every bite into the empty feeling in my stomach. Half of the men shuffling in looked hungover. The other half were alert and lively as they came and went. No matter their condition, every one of them noticed me tucked into the corner, doing my damnedest to not be seen.

I swallowed the last of my sandwich as Sugar and Tina finished explaining what a kitten was and their job. “Job” was a loose term, in my honest opinion. Having sex with the patched members didn’t sound like work to me, after I’d laid my eyes on several. Holy hell, the men in this place were hotter than a volcano erupting.

Every time someone new entered, my heart kicked up a notch, worried it might be her. The lady I’d gotten a glimpse of before I fainted last night. I hadn’t asked about her, nor would I.

At the very least, my mind was preoccupied, so I didn’t drown myself in mourning over losing my baby and my dire situation.

Little did I know I’d feel like a trapped mouse in a house full of kittens.

Amber and Misty were kittens. Both had brown hair, and that was where the similarities ended.

Amber was petite all around, adorable and young, at only twenty. She had a quiet, innocent voice. I couldn’t help but wonder if she always wanted to be a kitten.

Misty was the newest kitten and twenty-four. Taller than Amber, maybe five seven. Curvy all around and a loud talker. Every time she laughed, her cackle raked down my spine like metal, scraping glass. I wanted to plug my ears. Each time she flicked her gaze at me, I sensed she didn’t like me. Not sure why. I’d only just met her.

“So if being a kitten is their job, do they get paid for it, like prostitutes?” I didn’t want to be rude, but boy was I curious about the ins and outs of being a kitten. I glanced at Amber and Misty. They hadn’t joined our table as if there were clear boundaries between the old ladies and kittens.

“Yes, a little money, but they mostly get protection and privileges within the club. It’s a different arrangement from a pimp and prostitute,” Sugar said. “They have the right to say no. Doing what they do is a choice.”

My muscles coiled when I saw her enter. The blonde from last night cozied up with Boxer. She made a beeline for the table. Crap, she must’ve been his old lady.

I wanted to slide under the table or run downstairs to my room and hide. But no way would I do either. I steeled myself, putting my best face forward.

She sat next to Tina. “Afternoon all.” She covered her mouth and yawned.

“Late night or rather an early morning, huh?” Sugar smirked.

“Girl, I’m exhausted after last night.” Her light green eyes met mine. “Hi, I’m Libby. Snow, right?”

My stomach churned hearing her sweet voice. My word, she was stunning up close. “No, Aspen Crosby.” I extended my hand in front of Tina to shake my ex’s old lady’s hand. I could be civil and friendly, unlike Casso.

She accepted my gesture with a perplexed expression. “Oh, when he talks about you, he refers to you as Snow. It’s even tattooed over his heart.”

I withdrew my hand, feeling the air dissipate from my lungs. Rather than crumple in front of everyone, I acted unaffected. “Huh, strange.” I shrugged. “Please call me Aspen.”

He had my name tattooed on his chest? Whatever for?

Libby’s brow wrinkled. “Sure. I’m sorry. He just—”

“Enough, Libby,” Jill snapped. “She doesn’t need to know what Boxer tells you during sex!”

Gasps came from every direction.

“Jill,” Sugar said in a hushed tone.

“Oh my gosh.” Jill covered her mouth. “I’m so sorry, Asp.”

Forget hiding under a rock. Can the ground swallow me up now? I was utterly mortified, but no chance in hell would I show it.

“Don’t apologize to me.” I nodded toward Zach’s girl. “You owe Boxer’s old lady an apology.” I stood from my chair, completely over all this.

Libby shook her head frantically. “Oh, no. I’m—”

I raised my hand. “It was lovely to meet you.” I looked at the rest of the women. “I’m feeling tired and”—I put my hand on my stomach—“I need to rest.”

“Yes, of course, honey.” Tina stood and gave me a gentle hug. “You find me if you need anything.”

“Thank you.” I slipped away from the insanity with my heart in my throat.

How could I get worked up over meeting Zach’s old lady? I didn’t dare look at her hand to see if she had a wedding ring. Jill was an old lady, and she wasn’t married to Timur.

I shook my head as I went down the stairs. His road name was Wolf, not Timur. What a weird world this was.

Closing the door, I leaned my back against it. Peace and quiet.

It’d been more than ten years since Zach and I last saw each other. A lifetime since our relationship ended. We’d both moved on. Had other people in our lives.

Why was I envious of Libby when I hated Zach with a burning passion?

Because she had what I’d always wanted. She had my one true love.

No, if he’d been my one true love, we’d be together. Zach Harrisburg wasn’t who I thought he was. He destroyed me. Shredded my dreams of a life with him.

I swallowed down the emotion bubbling in my chest. The first chance I got, I’d flee this place and leave the country, so I never had to see Zach or Casso again.