Deviant Vows by Anna Widzisz

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Davina

When I made the decision to get married to Macsen Addison, I had been sure of two things. The first being the fact that I’d stay in charge no matter how much I’d get played and pressured into giving up my power to my husband, and the second I would never develop feelings for him. Needless to say, I’m not sure if I succeeded with the latter.

The days seem like a peaceful routine. Macsen and I no longer fight over anything. Not the business, our people, or family. We have established some kind of rules that work for us. We’ve even learnt to compromise which has never been something I thought I was capable of before. I gave up on the idea of doing it all on my own. Macsen took on some of the responsibilities and even started using the place to train soldiers. And he cut the two cartels loose. Now we have nothing to worry about when it comes to money or a possible war.

Our relationship has changed immensely as well. Every day we learn what it means exactly to be married and start taking it seriously. Even if neither of us has really ever intended to get married in the first place or known the first thing about marriage. He’s helped me overcome my fear of having someone behind me. Granted, only he can do that but that’s a huge step for me either way. No matter what I think about trust and how hard it is for people to develop any sense of this when it comes to me, he somehow sneaked his way into that small circle of those I do trust. It’s still a work in progress but nothing that time won’t fix.

Though I have my limits. I’m not very good at telling people how I feel. Fuck, I’m terrible at it. Always was. That’s why they always misinterpret and misunderstand my actions. Macsen's patience makes it better, though. He’s the more open one even if he doesn’t tell me things about his deeper feelings either. But he shows it every time we have sex. I can honestly admit it’s the best I’ve ever had.

My dark hair blows violently in the night wind while my father and I walk along the docks, supervising the first shipment with the new arrangements. I don’t think Michael is remotely capable of doing it on his own. His years of actually knowing how shit works in the underworld are long gone and if not for the appearances, I wouldn’t even bother hiring him. Though, he was still not old enough in our world for people to believe that he’d just retire. And it’d just have a ripple effect on me as a leader.

Everything is running smoothly and I can’t wait to go back home. It’s close to four in the morning, which is a close call when it comes to waterage so we need to wrap it up at once. I stay quiet, keeping my eyes fixed on the chests being temporarily transported to the warehouse since we have no way of distributing them at this very moment. My father is barking out orders, checking the manifesto to see whether all packages have arrived.

“It seems like we have everything,” he says after nearly five minutes.

“You still need to check back in the warehouse when they are all put there.” I point at the building.

He nods as we reach the entrance. I press the button on the black panel, typing in the code. The steel door buzzes and we are let in. We move through the dark corridor hearing our workers on the other side of the building. They are working fast and without conversation if it's not about where the boxes should be put or there’s enough on the first floor or not.

I walk into the main part of the warehouse, looking around. In the furthest corner, there is Diego who is waiting for me to finish here to take me home. He’s never been working as my bodyguard, though for some reason ever since I was attacked, he makes sure to ask me if I need him or not. I usually refuse because his girlfriend would probably be furious that he’s spending more time working than with her and I’m not one to make any of my people work overtime if it’s not completely necessary. However, I hate driving at night so I asked him to come with me.

“Diego,” I call, gesturing for him to come. Without waiting, I move to my office to take all of my things and look through the shipment documents one last time so I can leave.

I walk upstairs, passing my people as every single one of them nods in a manner of respect and continues to do their own thing. They all want to be home with their families surely. I buzz in and open the second set of doors. Taking a hoodie off of my body, I throw it on the chair and sit down, grabbing the thick file from the desk.

Diego gets in soon after, although he’s not alone. William, for some reason, makes an appearance. “We need to talk,” he says at once. His expression for the very first time is anything but cold and calculative. His eyes are dark and the circles underneath suggest he had no sleep, though it’s the worry in them that keeps me alarmed.

I look back at my guard, about to open my lips to tell him to wait outside but William stops me. “No, he should hear it. Maybe he’ll help.”

“Alright,” I tell him, shifting in my chair uncomfortably. The anxiety builds up in my chest and I know that whatever he has to say, it’s not going to be pretty.

“I got a call from my informant in the police department. He said that an anonymous document has been sent with all the information about your businesses, your finances. Everything,” he pauses, breathing heavily as if he ran here to tell me this. “Including the illegal ones.”

I shrug, unmoved. “So what? Dozens of my enemies want me gone so they are going to do whatever possible to get me to back down. It’s old news, William.”

“Not this time, Davina.” He takes out his phone and hands it to me. “This one has your signature on it. It’s not someone’s statement. It’s basically your confession to the crimes.”

I look at what’s written. Sure, there are all the things I’m involved in, or at least those I was involved in before marriage. Now it’s all shared with Macsen. It still doesn’t look real, though.

“It’s forged,” I tell him.

He slams his palms on the desk, making me jump from the loud sound. He leans forward, trying to get my attention. As if he didn’t have it.

“Listen to me, Davina. And listen very fucking carefully. It’s not forged. It is your fucking signature and even if it wasn’t, everything that’s in this document is true. It’s enough to open an investigation because they know where to look.”

I get that but it’s still laughable at best. “Calm down, uncle, will you? Those are the perks of being married. Whatever they want to investigate, they won’t be able to if I sign this over to Macsen. So there’s nothing to worry about.”

As William opens his lips with even more fire in his eyes, Diego clears his throat, reminding us that he’s still here. “Actually, it’s a big deal, Nyx,” he says. He takes a few steps towards us. “I don’t mean to interrupt or be tactless but isn't that exactly what you wanted to stop from happening even after your marriage? Addison taking over everything and being the only one boss in the Firm while you’re just his wife?”

I swallow, actually seeing what he is all about. I curse myself for actually thinking of it as a possibility when I’ve been fighting against it from the very beginning. Yet here I was making the proposition to give everything to Macsen.

“Exactly. Even if on paper, you’d give them everything. And they’d use it against you.”

Though I can’t help but agree with the men, I somehow can’t show that openly.

My brows pull together. “Haven’t you been the one to tell me that I should build an alliance with the Addisons, William? Now you’re telling me that they can’t be trusted. Which is it then?” My voice gets even deeper than usual, the darkness is almost palpable.

“I told you to have an arranged marriage in order to put the war behind you. You were losing too many people. I didn’t tell you to trust him completely. I don’t know them well enough to be certain that they wanted this marriage for any other reason than power. And I can’t really vouch for how much they’re willing to put into this to make it work. But you can’t be foolish, Davina, that much I’m sure of.”

For a few minutes, no one says anything. I’m trying to think who could have turned this document in and how someone could have known what I am involved in enough to even forge such a document in the first place.

I can’t figure this out. Just like I don’t know who attacked me that night in my house. The fact that I have many enemies doesn’t really help either. I have a secure house that only those with access can get into. And only two people know the code; my housekeeper and Diego. As for the business, many people know but rarely anyone knows each aspect of it other than William and Macsen.

As much as I don’t want to, my mind wanders over the latter. Out of everyone, he’s the one I trust the least. I don’t want to think he’s capable of putting me in this position after everything that happened.

However, at the same time, the images of his reaction to my attack and then later the story about my past aren’t something I’d ever expect from him. He doesn’t blink an eye when he kills someone, orders a kill, or tortures. He has seen it all already. So why in the world would me getting raped be any different? He doesn’t care whether someone’s a man or woman. He deals with all the same. There’s literally nothing to up his good intentions up.

Going to that dark place again isn’t an option. I refuse to doubt him again until I have proof. First, I need to deal with the police, though.

I shake my head. “Diego, your cousin is a lawyer, isn’t she?” I ask, glancing at my soldier.

“Yes, but she’s a corporate law barrister, not a criminal defence one.”

“It doesn’t matter. It’s about my business all the same. Until they charge me officially, we might be able to limit them from the business side.” I lean on the wall, breathing heavily. The lack of sleep is getting to me and my thinking. But the anxiety of this going any further is making me crazy. “Can you give her a call in the morning and make an appointment for today? We need to deal with it as soon as possible.”

“Sure, I’ll do that,” he agrees.

“What about Macsen?” William chimes in, voicing the one thing I am also thinking of out loud. “We shouldn’t just assume he had nothing to do with it. My guy wasn’t able to find out   who sent the file.”

I sigh and brush my fingertips over the edge of the desk. “I’ll talk to him and get a feel of whether it was him. If not, he needs to be let in on the situation.”

✽✽✽

Later that day, when I come back to the apartment, Macsen is already gone, having had to check up on our lab. Which is the best thing since I’m in no shape or form to talk to him now but I also can’t pretend as if my world hasn’t just been turned upside down. Or more accurately – it’s bouncing on the edge, about to tilt any way, depending on my next step. That’s why before I make any rushed decision out of pure tiredness, I ignore the housekeeper when she starts asking me if I want breakfast or anything else and walk up the stairs to the bedroom that Macsen and I share.

Ever since that day when I told him about Taylor and we spent the night by the fireplace, we’ve been sleeping in the same bed, and surprisingly, I don’t feel uncomfortable or as if I am in any sort of danger.

I fall asleep the moment my head hits the pillow and I smell the lavender, only to be back in motion three hours later. Diego woke me up with a phone call to tell me that his cousin has time this noon to meet me. So I dress in a hurry, putting on light blue jeans, an off-shoulder black shirt and high-heels. I decide against taking my guns and instead put them in the car, intending to leave them there.

When I leave the apartment and go down to the parking lot, Diego is already waiting by my car. I wave my hand with the keys in front of him before I throw them in the air in his direction. His expression changes into shock as he grabs them at the last possible moment.

“Drive,” I order him emotionlessly. “I had barely any sleep. I’d crash.”

Even those three hours I was in bed, I was turning most of it. My mind is a mess right now so I can only hope that after this meeting, I’ll get some shut eye. At least until I need to talk to Macsen. He had sent me a voice message keeping me updated on his plan for today in case I want to join him at any of the meetings. Though, I couldn’t care less.

I get in the passenger's seat and lean my head against the headrest, closing my eyes.

“Can I ask you something?” I hear Diego’s voice a few minutes into the drive. I’m in no mood to talk but I decide to humour him since he made an effort to help me out with that shitty situation I found myself in.

I turn my head to him. “What is it?”

“You’ve never really acknowledged me before, nor any other of your soldiers for that matter,” he says.

“That is not a question.”

“What has changed now? You’re actually including me in your business.”

I sigh. This is why being nice isn’t worth my damn time. I get questions like this as if I’m supposed to tell them my life story up to the moment why I decided to do something out of the ordinary. “I’m not including you in my business. You’re just convenient because you’re around. Don’t look into this more than necessary. You won’t find anything.”

“Is that because I saved you?” He doesn’t give up. I need to give him that – he’s stubborn as fuck. “Because if so, then I don’t want it.”

Now he’s got me. I frown at his words, my eyebrow rising. “You don’t want special treatment from your boss? That’s a first.”

“So you do admit I have special treatment?”

Bloody hell.

I roll my eyes. “Let’s get one thing straight, Diego. I don’t give a shit that you’ve saved me beyond the fact that I’m grateful. I’m not one to promote someone because of a single good deed. Only your work ethic might do that for you, and you’re not there yet. At least, not completely.”

He nods, looking pleased with my answer. As if it’s exactly what he’s been waiting to hear. Perhaps I actually do have someone working for me who is about more than just money.

The rest of the ride we spend in complete silence. It gives me time to put everything together that I need to tell the lawyer. Since she’s not part of the Firm, she can’t really know the details. Even if she’s Diego’s family and probably knows more about what he’s doing for a living than he’d care to admit.

We have lawyers within the Firm but right now it would mean Macsen would find out about this case before I can do anything about it. Besides, my plan is to stop it before the police will get any tangible proof of my illegal activities. Something more than a piece of paper that they can’t be certain has been signed by me personally.

When we walk into the law firm building, we are directed to the third floor by the receptionist.

“I’ll wait outside. You need to talk to her alone,” Diego tells me, stopping by the door to his cousin’s office.

I don’t answer. Instead, I knock on the door, and upon hearing the invitation, I go in.

Emma Evans is sitting behind her mahogany desk, typing something on her laptop. Her posture is slouched slightly and her glasses slide down from her nose every few seconds and she pushes them back up. Her long wavy brunette hair is pulled in a high ponytail with a few strands falling on her cheeks. She’s an older and definitely more beautiful version of Diego. Without a doubt, they both take from their mothers because the resemblance is striking.

She looks up at me and her lips pull in a tight smile. It’s not hard to realise that she’s not happy to see me needing her help, and for a very good reason. However, I have no other choice. So it is what it is.

She gets up. She’s wearing a white dress shirt with a long light grey skirt. Just as lawyers usually do.

“Hello, Mrs Kinsley,” she greets me, extending her hand. I walk up to the desk and shake it, even though I usually avoid any kind of contact. She gestures to the chair right next to me. “Please, sit down.”

“Thank you for seeing me on such short notice. And please, call me Davina.” I try to be as nice as possible.

“It’s not a problem.” Even though it is for her, surely. “How can I help you? Diego hasn’t been very forthcoming with the information. He just said it might be a criminal case. Which I’m honestly not sure I’ll be able to help you with, if so.”

“I’m hoping for this thing not to go any further than some diminished corporate law case. Which is why you might be exactly what I need.”

I hand her the file with a few documents that William managed to recover from the informant along with the one I supposedly signed. Then I rest in the chair, watching Emma silently reading through all of it as her expressions change with each sentence. Yes, everything that has been written down there is enough to make people question their life decisions, alongside me. Even if I would never admit to my mob business and what I’m involved in exactly to any outsider, I take immense pride in my job and achievements. So it’s rather idiotic that someone took their time to falsify so many things. Because with some hard truth, there are those that I wouldn’t touch with a bargepole. Perhaps Macsen, not me.

“Can I be blunt with you, Davina?” Emma asks at last, biting her lip unsure who she’s dealing with exactly. And how far can she go. That's something I see a lot in my everyday life. It’s obvious she has some strong opinions when it comes to my profession.

I admire that. Which is why I nod, agreeing to it.

“Aren’t your double book-keepings enough for this case? Especially since there’s no case yet, to begin with.”

Alright, it’s too blunt for my liking. I can't exactly answer her.

“At first, I was hoping to sign over all the businesses to my husband, although I’ve been advised against it. What other possibility is there?” I choose to ignore her question.

“Well as I see it, it’s not enough to go on and open this case or charge you with anything. Are all your businesses self-made?”

I shake my head. “Most belonged to my brother-in-law earlier. Why?”

“Has he given them to you or–” She doesn’t finish as I put my hand up. Maybe unintentionally but she actually gave me an idea without wanting to. I smile.

“Can I argue that they have already been checked by the authorities before?”

Emma frowns. “Technically, but it’s not like something that was once legal can’t be illegal later on. You’d lose in court with that argument pretty quickly.”

But it doesn’t matter how this argument would work in court because I have no desire to even appear there in the first place. One thing Taylor had done right in this pathetic life of his was maintaining his pristine reputation as a businessman. Of course, with my father as the Fixer by his father’s and then his side.

When I took over, I didn’t bother to go through his business deals. I made mine on top of his. I worked from the beginning and ignored whatever he’d done before me. Surprisingly, Taylor might be able to help me get back on track.

I clear my throat, looking back at Emma whose expression is a mix of confusion and annoyance. “If I have any other questions, can I call you?” I ask, getting up. Perhaps, I didn’t need her help at all. I just needed to have someone who’d show me a fresh perspective. Though, it also depends on how things are going to turn out for me later on.

“I’d prefer not,” she says quietly but confidently. “Don’t get me wrong, I’ve heard many times how much Diego admires you and I understand that there are certain motives that I probably don’t get and will never get. But you’re still who you are, and I’m all for the law and justice so it doesn’t sit well with me to be associated with the likes of you.”

She doesn’t say it to be mean. And I get it. “Then why did you agree to meet with me in the first place?” I have to know.

“Because I owed Diego a favour. I’m surprised he used it on you, but I guess respect knows no bounds.” The phone on her desk rings. She reaches for it, adjusting her glasses yet again. “Are we done here? I need to take this.”

“Yes, thank you.”

I leave the office in a hurry so I can get started on everything. First, I need to talk to William to include him in this, then probably with Macsen to exclude him from the list of suspects, hopefully, and finally set myself free of any possible charges.