Alpha Theo by C.J. Primer

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Brooke

It feels good to be home. It’s my safe place, my comfort zone. Even though the complex is technically ‘home’ now, it’s not the same as being back here where I grew up. I’ve always loved Summervale.

I haven’t left the house since my dad brought me here on Saturday morning. I think my parents can tell that something’s wrong, but thankfully they’ve given me space and haven’t pried. I’ve been trying to stay busy, cooking with Mom and watching baseball on TV with Dad. Anything to get my mind off of Theo.

At night, when I’m alone with my thoughts, I’m tortured by my memories. I keep replaying them over and over in my mind- how it felt to lay beside him and listen to music when we were in Denver, to let go and take that ski-lift ride up the mountain, that kiss…

I keep trying push out the good memories, to focus on the bad and turn my pain into anger. I have to make myself hate him, because that’s the only way it doesn’t hurt. He called me a bitch, left me stranded on the side of the road. Rather than coming back for me, he got drunk and hooked up with Sutton. Even if I could’ve gotten past the other stuff, that last infraction is unforgivable. It proves that I didn’t mean a thing to him.

He meant so much to me. More than I even realized, until it was all over. I feel so despondent, so numb, so broken. At least the full moon run’s tonight. For a few hours, I’ll be able to get out of my own head, give myself over to my wolf. Wander the forest alive and free.

“Brooke, you ready to go?” I hear my mom call up the stairs.

I roll over in my bed, throwing the covers off. I came up here to take a nap before the run, but sleep hasn’t come easily the past few nights. Theo’s texts have made it even harder. He keeps sending me messages saying that he’s sorry and wants to talk. I keep ignoring them.

“Yeah,” I call back, pulling myself out of bed. I head to the bathroom to put in my contact lenses before coming downstairs, finding my parents seated side by side on the living room couch.

“Alpha Anders has to be happy about it,” I hear my mom say to Dad as I walk up behind them. “Especially after he’s been away for so long.”

“Who?” I ask.

Mom turns to look at me over the back of the couch while Dad rises to his feet.

“Theo came back for the run,” she says casually.

I swear my heart stops beating.

“They’re going to make the announcement tonight about Cory taking Joe’s place as Beta, so he came to show his support.” Dad holds a hand out to Mom to help her up.

“I think it’s great!” Mom chirps, taking my dad’s hand and rising to stand. “I mean I’m sure the squad keeps him busy, but it’s nice that he was able to get away to celebrate the occasion with his pack.”

They keep talking, but I don’t hear it. My entire body has gone numb. My ears are ringing. My mind spins. Theo’s back for the run? Tonight? He’s here? I feel like I’m going to be sick.

“Honey? Are you okay?” My mom’s voice cuts through the white noise in my head as I draw a ragged breath, anchoring myself back in reality.

“Huh?” I blink.

She approaches me, sets a hand on my shoulder. “Are you alright?”

I swallow hard, nodding. My eyes meet hers and they’re clouded with concern.

“Yeah,” I breathe. “I’m, uh… I’m actually not feeling well. I think I’m gonna stay in tonight, skip the run.”

“Ah, come on,” Dad pipes up, walking over to join us. “You were so excited for the run!”

I shuffle uncomfortably, shrugging my mom’s hand off of my shoulder. “I’m just not up for it tonight.”

Mom stares at me, her expression stoic. “Are you sure that’s wise, sweetie? You know how your wolf is…”

I take a shaky step backwards, tucking my hair behind my ears. “I’ll be fine. I can keep her under control.”

Mom keeps her eyes trained on me, looking uneasy. I don’t blame her- she’s seen firsthand how wild my wolf is, how dangerous she can be if I try to stifle her.

“I just really need to get some sleep,” I mumble. “You guys go ahead without me.”

“Okay…” Mom says apprehensively, stepping forward to give me a hug. I stand there stiffly, unable to return it.

My parents shuffle out the door and as soon as they’re gone, I run upstairs to my room, closing myself in. I crawl back in bed, pull the covers up over my head. Try not to panic.

Time passes slowly. I attempt to clear my mind, meditate. Chase sleep. I’m almost successful, too, until…

I hear a faint howl in the distance, cutting through the silence of my bedroom. Then another. My wolf stirs inside my chest, then starts going berserk, clawing at my insides, fighting to get out. It’s so painful to fight her back, keep her in. I writhe underneath the blankets, gritting my teeth, trying with all my might to force her to recede.

It’s no use. She wants out, and if I don’t give her what she wants there could be consequences. I throw myself out of bed, stumble to the door. Run downstairs, through the living room, into the kitchen. I pull open the slider door right as another howl cuts through the silence of the forest behind my house.

My skin tingles- my shift is so close. I curse my wolf as I pull my shirt off overhead, then my sports bra. I drop them on the patio, and I barely have time to slide my leggings down before the tingling gets stronger, the air around me shimmering with my shift. I groan as my bones snap, rearrange. The next thing I know, I’m looking down at sandy-colored paws.

I fight to stay present as my wolf stretches, strides forward into the grass. Throws her head back to howl to the moon. Then we spring forward, tearing toward the thick brush at the edge of the forest.

I shouldn’t have held my wolf back. As soon as I’m in the forest, I feel blissful, delightfully overwhelmed by the sounds and smells of nature. This was exactly what I needed- to let go and run, joyful and free. My paws pound the earth as I sprint through the forest, leaping over tree stumps and dodging fallen branches.

Suddenly, I scent something strange in the air. Strange, and… delicious. Intoxicating. I skid to a stop, throwing my head back in an effort to identify where it’s coming from. Every hair on my body stands on end. My wolf cedes control slightly so we’re both equally present, both frantically searching for the source of that incredible scent.

I follow it, and it feels like it’s physically pulling me, yanking me in one direction. My whole body is buzzing with excitement and delight- I feel half drunk as I sprint, the scent getting stronger the closer I get.

I skid to a stop again, completely overwhelmed with a feeling of euphoria as I stare at a huge silver wolf standing a few feet away from me. To my surprise, my own wolf suddenly recedes- the air shimmers and my body tingles and suddenly I’m in human form again, rising to stand on two legs. I stare across from me at the crouched human form where the other wolf stood, watch him rise to his feet.

Theo blinks at me through the darkness, his hazel eyes locking with mine.

“Mate.”

The word is barely out of his mouth when I feel the mate bond snap into place between us, pulling me to Theo like a bungee cord. It’s warm, enchanting, enticing. I’m drawn to him with every fiber of my being- it’s physically painful to hold my ground, resist the pull.

He takes a step toward me, the moonlight illuminating his naked form.

“No,” I breathe, shaking my head.

Theo stops in his tracks.

I’m hit with a flood of emotions. They’re my own, but they’re amplified tenfold- all of the anger, the hurt, the humiliation that I’ve been feeling over the past few days rushes over me, makes me feel like I’m drowning.

“No! Not you! It can’t be you!” My voice is strained; it sounds far away, like it isn’t even my own.

My wolf pushes forward again and I give in, shifting. For once, we’re on the same page- Theo hurt us. We don’t want this. As soon as my paws hit the ground I spin around, leap into the brush.

I run. Away from Theo, straining against the pull of the mate bond I feel tugging me back in his direction.

I hear him call after me, but I don’t turn back.

~

By the time I reach the packhouse in Goldenleaf, I’m so exhausted that I’m on the verge of collapse. My paws are torn open and bleeding, my throat feels like sandpaper. I ran for miles and miles- through the forest, through other packs’ territories. I let my wolf lead me, knew she’d bring me to my sister somehow. I can’t believe I finally made it.

I drag myself through the treeline behind the packhouse and throw my head back, let out a howl. As I slowly approach, I see my sister appear at one of the big glass doors, pulling it open. Only then do I shift.

The shift itself is easy; my wolf’s exhausted, ready to tuck herself away. I’m shaky as I rise on two legs- my muscles are cramping; my feet and palms are sticky with blood. I’m filthy from my arduous journey across the sprawling six-pack territory.

Fallon jogs across the lawn to meet me, her eyes thrown wide. She’s clutching a navy blue bath towel in her hands. “Brooke?”

“Theo.” I choke. “Theo’s my…”

My twin skids to a stop in front of me, wrapping the towel around my body, staring at me earnestly as she secures it in front of my chest. “He’s your mate, isn’t he?”

I bite my lip, nodding.

Fallon pulls me in, squeezing me tight. “I had a feeling,” she whispers.

“What?!” I push her away, take a wobbly step backwards. The towel slips and I grab for it, tucking an end in to secure it again. “And you didn’t tell me?!” I demand, my voice breaking.

Fallon draws a breath. “I wanted to, but…”

“But what?!”

I feel like the world is closing in on me, like I’m being crushed by betrayal. Fate betrayed me by choosing the one man who hurt me as my mate. My own sister betrayed me by her omission.

“Well I didn’t think he’d go home for the run, I figured he’d stay here like he always does!” Fallon says exasperatedly, throwing up her hands. “And with how upset you were the other night, I guess I thought I’d give you some time before I shared my suspicions…”

I shake my head, tears forming in my eyes.

“How could fate get it so wrong?” I ask hoarsely.

Fallon stares at me, her eyes so full of compassion. “Come on,” she urges, slinging an arm over my shoulders. She leads me toward the packhouse, inside and upstairs.

When we reach the top of the stairs, a very concerned looking Gray appears at the end of the hallway, striding toward us.

“What’s wrong?” he asks. “Is it…?”

Fallon just nods. While she didn’t share her suspicions about the mate bond with me, she evidently shared them with her own mate, because Gray nods back in understanding.

He blows out a breath, stabbing his fingers through his hair as he gazes at me sympathetically. “Come on,” he grumbles, turning around and gesturing. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Gray leads us down the hall to a guest room as Fallon and I trail behind. Once we’re inside, Fallon brings me over to the large bed and I sink down onto it, clutching the towel around my body. She turns back to Gray.

“I appreciate that you’re trying to help, babe, but…”

“Yeah,” he sighs, picking up on her insinuation. “Of course. I’ll be downstairs. Just let me know if you need anything.”

The way she smiles at him makes my heart shatter all over again. How could fate have gotten it so right for my sister and so wrong for me?

As Gray closes the door behind him, Fallon takes a seat on the bed beside me, brushing my hair out of my face with her fingertips.

“How’d you know?” I croak, staring blankly at my sister.

She gives me that tender look again, biting her bottom lip softly. “I didn’t know for sure. I just suspected it after you told me about the sparks.”

My eyes well up with tears. “This can’t be happening,” I gasp, shaking my head. “I can’t think of any two people who are less compatible!”

“Brooke…” Fallon coos, stroking my hair down my back. “I know things are tough right now, but you’ve gotta know that fate put you two together for a reason. You said things were going great between the two of you up until Friday night…”

I narrow my eyes, shrugging her hand away. “What happened to ‘screw that guy’?” I demand. “You’re supposed to be on my side here!”

“I am on your side,” she sighs. “But Brooke, he’s your mate. You can’t just throw away the bond…”

“Yes I can,” I grumble, staring down at my lap. “I can reject it.”

I don’t actually know anybody who has rejected the fated mate bond, but I know it’s possible. If Theo and I don’t mark each other before the next full moon, the bond will dissolve away.

Fallon blows out a breath and reaches over to take my hand. I yank it away.

“Listen, I know Theo’s an asshole,” she says. “Mate or not, I still wanna punch him in the dick for leaving you on the side of the road the other night. He’s got a lot of groveling to do to make things right, he still has to prove he’s worthy of you. But the bond, Brooke, it’s… special. You can say you want to reject it, but you don’t know what you’re giving up…”

“It doesn’t feel special, Fallon, it hurts!” I lament, a tear slipping down my cheek.

She reaches out to rub my back, trying to console me. “When the bond snapped in for me, I remember all of my feelings about Gray were amplified. Maybe it’s the same for you, but right now they’re negative emotions…” Fallon trails off, scooching closer to me on the bed. “I’m sure it won’t feel like this forever. If you two can patch things up, accept the bond…”

“The bond isn’t going to change anything!” I spit, shaking my head adamantly. My eyes fly up to meet Fallon’s. “He didn’t just leave me on the side of the road, Fal, He slept with someone else! I saw him coming back to the dorms that night with Sutton…”

My sister’s eyes fly wide.

Tears well up in my own as I draw a ragged breath. “I thought he’d changed. I thought we had something special. But…” I stare down at my hands, turning them over on my lap. They’re still caked in blood. I can feel Fallon staring at me, but for once, she’s speechless.

After a long moment, she clears her throat. “Why don’t you take a shower?” she urges. “I’m gonna call mom and dad and let them know you’re here. Get cleaned up, then we can talk some more.”

I acquiesce, heading to the en-suite bathroom, turning on the shower. While I wait for the water to heat, I stare at my reflection in the mirror. I look like hell. My eyes don’t even look like my own- they’re sunken, dull, lifeless.

When the bathroom starts to fill with steam, I slip into the shower, try to wash myself clean. I let out the sorrow, the frustration- my body trembles, wracked with sobs. I’m in disbelief that fate would be this cruel, would get it so wrong. I don’t know if it’s the water from the shower or my own tears streaming down my face- I’m not sure where the water ends and my tears begin.

I do know two things, though.

Theo’s my mate.

And I’m going to reject him.