First Kiss at Christmas by Lee Tobin McClain

CHAPTER TWELVE

“I’MSOGLADI ran into you,” Kayla said to Sylvie as they headed toward a window table at Goody’s. It was Monday, barely lunchtime, and the restaurant was hopping with Christmas week shoppers. “This isn’t the best place for my waistline, but it is the place to be in Pleasant Shores. I can’t believe this is your first time.”

“Not the last, I hope,” Sylvie said as they settled into their seats.

They’d encountered each other at Lighthouse Lit, Mary’s bookstore. Kayla was taking advantage of the time off school by shopping for a gift for her mother, who went through a couple of books a week. Sylvie had been in the same section—cozy mysteries—and had given Kayla some suggestions about what her mother might like. They’d chatted for a few minutes about the book club selection, which they’d both read, and then Kayla had asked Sylvie if she wanted to join her for lunch.

She might not have done it, except that Sylvie looked blue. It had reminded Kayla that Sylvie was alone in town. Since the preschool had gone on break, she probably didn’t see many people. Kayla knew the holiday season wasn’t happy for everyone.

And indeed, Sylvie had taken her up on the offer instantly.

Now, she took a sip of chocolate milkshake and her careworn expression changed into a happy one. “Wow. This is fantastic.”

“Goody’s milkshakes are famous.” Kayla tasted hers. “Yum. Goody takes ‘drink away your worries’ to a whole different level.”

The place was already crowded. Bags and packages surrounded most of the tables, indicating that Sylvie and Kayla weren’t the only ones who’d been shopping. The residents of Pleasant Shores were big on supporting local businesses. And, apparently, on waiting for the last minute to get their Christmas shopping done.

In the slightest of nods to the season, Goody had draped ribbon around the cash register, and an artificial poinsettia sat beside it. That was all. The music playing was country, not Christmas. “Goody’s a little Scrooge-like,” Kayla told Sylvie. “So if you get tired of all the Christmas music and decorations, this is the place to come.”

“I do get tired of it.” Sylvie picked up a french fry and tasted it. “Wow, terrific fries, too. She doesn’t need to decorate as long as the food’s this good.”

Kayla bit into a steaming crab cake and then fanned the air in front of her face. “Whew, that’s hot.” She swallowed and asked, “How do you like Pleasant Shores so far?”

“Love it,” Sylvie said immediately. “That’s why I’m putting off a trip home.”

“Filmore, Pennsylvania, right? Are you staying there through Christmas?”

Sylvie shook her head. “No way. I’d honestly rather spend the day in my motel room than be back there.”

“Trouble?” Kayla was ashamed that this was the first time she’d wondered what Sylvie’s life was like outside her work at the school. “Family you don’t want to see?”

“Not exactly,” Sylvie said. “I mean, it’s typical trouble. I think I need to break up with my boyfriend there, but that’s easier said than done.” She nibbled a fry. “How about you? You’re dating Jax’s uncle, right?”

“No!” Kayla’s cheeks heated as she thought of the last time she’d seen Tony. The cool breeze, the moonlight, the Christmas lights on the boats...and most of all, the kiss.

That had made her feel like she was seeing someone. But Tony hadn’t called or texted yesterday, and so far, nothing today. So maybe the kiss hadn’t been as magical for him as it had been for her. Maybe she’d been bad at kissing. Maybe it hadn’t meant anything to him, had just been the combination of the event and the opportunity and the season.

“Funny,” Sylvie said, “I got the feeling there was something between you.”

I got that feeling, too. But apparently Tony didn’t. “All that’s between us is Jax,” she said firmly. “I’ll do what I can to help the child. I feel so sorry for him, losing his mother to violence.”

“That would be traumatic. Poor kid.” Sylvie hesitated, then asked, “Do you...do you think he remembers anything about it?”

Kayla frowned. “It wasn’t that long ago, so I’m sure he remembers her when she was alive.”

“I mean, was he there? Did he see what happened?”

“Oh. Yeah, I think he was.” Kayla remembered what he’d said that day at Paul and Amber’s. “He was talking to another little boy about it, and he said his mother fell down and didn’t get up. So he must have seen it happen.” Her heart broke for the poor kid. “I can’t imagine anything more awful than that.”

“It is awful,” Sylvie murmured. “I wonder if he’ll have to testify in court. Wonder if he saw the killer. Do you think he did?”

Sylvie sounded strangely curious. “Did you know him back in Filmore?” Kayla asked.

“No. No, I didn’t. I just wondered, you know?”

Kayla pushed her basket of fries away. “I have no idea what he may have seen. I hope, for his sake, it wasn’t much.”

Goody’s door was opening and closing, people coming and going. Kayla hadn’t been paying attention, but at the sound of a deep voice, something electric shot up and down her spine.

Tony was here. She glanced over and saw him and Jax joining the line to order food.

“Miss Kayla!” Jax ran over and hurled himself against Kayla’s side. “We saw you in the window. Guess what, we’re getting a dog and you can come help!”

“You’re getting a dog? That’s awesome!” Kayla smiled, pushed away from the table, and focused on Jax. Such a sweet, enthusiastic little boy, and resilient, too. She already missed her preschool kids, this one especially.

“Yeah!” Jax climbed into her lap, and Kayla melted at his easy affection. “Dr. Liz said we need another grown-up. Can you come?”

“There you are!” Tony strode across the restaurant. “Jax, you’re supposed to stay beside me. I didn’t know where you’d gone.”

“I ’vited her to come with us.” Jax bounced up and down, smiling broadly. “To get our new dog.”

“Buddy, you’re supposed to let grown-ups do the asking,” Tony said, his face flushing. “Sorry, Kayla.”

Why wasn’t he meeting her eyes?

Immediately her mind raced to interpret his expression and actions. Whereas Jax, who loved simply and unconditionally, wanted to invite her on this most important of shopping trips, Tony didn’t agree.

She’d give him a graceful way out, pretend she hadn’t taken the invitation seriously. “You two need to have lunch,” she told Jax, “so you have energy for dog shopping. Miss Sylvie and I were just finishing. You can have our table.”

“Do we have time?” Jax looked up at his uncle.

“Sure do,” Tony said. “Hi, Sylvie. Didn’t mean to ignore you. Are you enjoying your time off from school?”

Sylvie smiled at Tony and Jax. “It’s nice to sleep in a little, but I miss the kids.”

Jax leaned against Kayla’s leg and studied the woman, his sweet face going serious. “You were in my bad dream,” he said.

“I’m sorry, honey.” Looking distressed, Sylvie stood quickly and started gathering her paperware. “This has been fun, but I need to get on the road. If I don’t see you folks again, Merry Christmas.”

Kayla watched her toss her trash into the garbage and hurry away. There was something different about Sylvie. She seemed to have a lot going on beneath the surface.

“DeNunzio!” called Goody from behind the counter.

“That’s our food. Mind if we sit down for a minute?”

“Go for it,” she said, and a moment later, he returned with a tray holding two baskets of fish and chips and two milkshakes. Tony and Jax ate heartily for a few minutes. When they’d slowed down, Kayla asked Tony, “Is it true that you’re getting a dog?”

“We’re looking at dogs, at a place in town and then maybe at a shelter up the shore,” he said. “Just looking for now.”

“Right. The week before Christmas is exciting enough for kids without adding a new dog into the mix.” She looked at Jax, who was bouncing in his chair. “Is Jax going too? Because...”

“I know, I know.” Tony laughed a little. “I’m probably fighting a losing battle.” He hesitated, then added, “Dr. Liz, our therapist, suggested I bring another adult to help with the dog and Jax. Any chance you’ve got time to do that?”

“Please, Miss Kayla?” Jax looked up at her, his brown eyes wide.

She did have time, but it probably wasn’t wise to spend that time with Tony and Jax, considering Tony’s nonreaction to their kiss.

She looked at Jax’s eager face again. “Sure, I’ll go,” she said.

TWOHOURSAFTERencountering Kayla at Goody’s, Tony listened to Jax crying in the back seat as he turned the car north. “Sorry to put you through this,” he said to Kayla, who was in the passenger seat beside him.

“I wanted a dog!” Jax wailed.

“I know you did, sweetie.” Kayla reached back to pat Jax. “You made the right call,” she said to Tony. “None of the therapy dogs they had were ready or right.”

“Which makes sense to adults, but not to a little boy.” Tony sighed. “If the rescue Dr. Liz told us about doesn’t have the right dog, we’re in for a long night.” He felt, rather than heard, Kayla stiffen, retraced what he’d said, and frowned. “I mean Jax and I. You don’t have to be involved. This is already a lot to ask.”

“It’s fine.” She opened her mouth like she wanted to say something else, and then closed it again and looked out the window.

Why did everything have to be so awkward with Kayla now?

But he knew why: because of that kiss on Saturday night. He hadn’t been able to get it out of his mind.

It had been a mistake to do it, but he didn’t regret it. The kiss was something to hold on to, that momentary feeling: swept away and excited, but also content. Holding Kayla had just felt right.

As a matter of fact, as soon as he and Kayla had started dancing, he’d caught a glimpse of what real love and a family life might be like. Looking around on the dance floor, he’d seen other couples sharing the same close embrace, the same look in their eyes. Married couples. Happy married couples.

He wanted it. Badly. With Kayla.

But he couldn’t have it, not when he was so flawed, not when he’d failed his sister so badly, and Jax, too. So the goal today was to get Kayla’s help with dog shopping and then gently, kindly, back away from her.

The thought of letting her go made him feel as desolate as the marshy area they were driving through, where dozens of tree trunks stuck up like bleak, bare posts. They’d lost their branches and died, killed by the salt water that was increasingly taking over the land.

Duck blinds and deer stands of various sizes stood in the distance. The Eastern Shore was mostly thought of as a vacation destination—he’d always thought of it that way himself—but parts of it were wild, cut off from mainstream civilization. Hunting was a popular pastime; in fact, Evan Stone had invited him to some local hunting event.

The place was complex, full of unexpected facets. Kind of like the woman riding beside him.

“Slow down!” Kayla said.

He braked. “What’s wrong?”

“Sika deer. Look.” She pointed at a couple of tiny deer standing by the side of the road.

He let the car glide closer and studied the small, spotted creatures. One lifted its head and looked at them, then went back to eating a patch of greenery that had survived the cold temperatures.

At the same time, both Kayla and Tony turned toward Jax. But he was sleeping, his head slumped to one side in his booster seat.

They looked at each other, and their gazes tangled. They’d both had the same thought. Tony wished he could have that permanently in his life: someone on the same wavelength, someone who thought of Jax in the same way he did. Wanting him to be able to see an interesting animal, but also wanting him to get the rest he needed.

Tony tore his gaze away from Kayla’s and forced a practical, parenting tone into his voice. “Better not wake him up.”

“There will be other deer. They’re actually sort of common here.”

Easy. She was so easy to get along with. He drove past the deer couple slowly and then picked up the pace.

“Look,” he said, “I appreciate your coming today, when—”

“About that kiss,” she said at the same time.

He had to smile even though it was awkward. They really were on the same page. “You first.”

“I was just going to say, just because it was my first kiss, that doesn’t mean you have to feel awkward or obligated in any way. I’m not expecting you to give me a ring or anything.”

Talk about cutting right to the chase. He glanced over at her and saw that her cheeks were red. It hadn’t been easy for her to say that.

“I wish I could be, you know, more to you.” He was feeling his way. But it was easier to talk while driving than while sitting somewhere face-to-face. “I... It was great, Kayla, really. I just can’t...” He trailed off.

Because what could he say? He’d already told her he felt guilty about everything.

And she’d accused him of thinking like a toddler.

“It’s fine. No need to explain. Hey, slow down!” She pointed. “Aren’t we supposed to turn on Boar’s Neck Road?”

“Right. Hold on.” He slowed and turned.

“Uncle Tony?” came a sleepy voice from the back seat. “Are we there?”

“Just about.” And more than that, they were done with this awkward and difficult conversation, at least for now.

“Want me to go in and scope it out, sort of pave the way?” Kayla asked.

“That would be great.” If there was paperwork to be done or a long line, getting started would cut down on the amount of time Jax had to be patient.

He watched her walk into the shelter, her blond ponytail swishing back and forth, her pace energetic. He remembered what her hair had looked like at the Crabby Christmas event, curling down around her shoulders.

He remembered what it had felt like. And every day, it seemed, he saw more ways she’d be a great partner to the right man.

Which wasn’t him.

“C’mon, let’s go in!” Jax’s words pulled him out of his thoughts, and the child was matching words to actions, unhooking himself from his booster seat and climbing down.

“Stay in the car until I get you,” he reminded Jax.

“Hurry! The dogs might be all gone!”

Tony doubted that, but he climbed out of the car quickly and opened the rear passenger door. “Hold my hand,” he ordered. He was still learning to state and enforce all the many crucial rules involved with kids—and just how important they were. Jax was bouncing up and down, tugging at him; clearly, he’d been ready to run across the parking lot into the building with no thought of traffic.

Inside the shelter, Kayla was filling out an adoption form. “They don’t hold dogs,” she explained. “If we want one of theirs, we have to take it home today. I figured I’d fill it out for you just in case.”

Tony knelt in front of Jax. “Remember, we’re looking. We might not find the right pet for us today.”

“I know.” Jax rose to his tiptoes, trying to see past Tony into a room full of dogs in pens.

“Okay.” Kayla stood. “That’s mostly done. You can finish the rest of it if today goes well.”

“Come on back,” the worker said. She had frizzy gray hair and looked tired, but friendly.

In the kennel room, Jax couldn’t contain himself. He raced from pen to pen, shouting, “I want this one! And this one! No, this one!” His movements whipped the dogs into a frenzy of barking.

“Jax!” Tony scolded. “Settle down. You have to be quiet and walk slowly, so the dogs don’t get scared.”

“I don’t feel quiet.” But he came obediently back to Tony’s side.

The worker pointed out a kennel that held a grizzled-looking beagle. “Clyde would be nice for first-time dog owners,” she said. “He does like to run away, that’s the breed, but he doesn’t run very fast anymore. He sleeps a lot.”

Tony nodded, liking the dog’s floppy ears and wrinkled forehead. Then he watched as Jax unsuccessfully tried to prod Clyde into action with fingers poking through the wire. “I’m not sure we’re the best family for an older dog,” he said.

“Now this is LuLu.” The worker pointed to a dirty-looking poodle. “She’s a real beauty when she’s freshly groomed. Kind of a prima donna, too.”

“She’s for a girl,” Jax announced, and walked right past her pen.

Tony had to smile. He’d been thinking the same thing.

Kayla and Jax both knelt by a small pen holding a brown mop of a dog. “This one’s cute,” Kayla said.

“Yeah, I like this one,” Jax agreed.

The kennel worker shook her head. “Too small for a household with a young child,” she said. “And he’s actually pretty aggressive. Don’t let him—”

But Jax was already extending his hand toward the kennel’s wire fencing, and suddenly, the little mop lunged, baring his teeth. Jax yanked his arm away and tumbled backward. He stared at the dog, his lower lip trembling.

Kayla put an arm around him. “Some dogs aren’t right for you, but that doesn’t mean you did anything wrong,” she reassured him.

“That’s right,” said the worker. “Tell you what, you take your time and look around. Let me know if you like any of the dogs, and I’ll tell you more about them.”

They walked around to see the rest of the dogs. There was a beautiful husky, but he cowered in the back of the pen. Another, a bulldog mix, seemed too old and rickety for a child with Jax’s energy level. A Chihuahua barked fiercely at them, making Jax step back and cling onto Tony.

“This might not be our day, buddy,” Tony said. He felt disappointed himself.

“Are there any other possibilities?” Kayla asked the kennel worker, who was at a big sink washing dog dishes.

“Well...there’s Paddington, but I don’t think—”

“We read stories about Paddington,” Jax interrupted. “He’s a bear.”

The worker chuckled. “Our Paddington is kind of like a bear, too.” She looked at Tony. “He’s a large Saint Bernard, young, not even two years old. He’s just coming out of quarantine today—we quarantine all our dogs for two weeks when they come in—so nobody’s looked at him yet. But I don’t think...”

“I wanna see Paddington,” Jax said. “Please, Uncle Tony?”

“We may as well take a look, if he’s available for adoption,” Tony said.

“Oh, he’s available. But I don’t think he’s quite what you want.”

As she spoke, she led them to a little room, bare except for a bench and some dog toys. “You can meet him here,” she said, still sounding doubtful.

A moment later, a big furry creature bounded into the room...and bumped straight into the wall. It yelped and then jumped back, cowering a little.

“It’s okay, big guy.” The kennel worker grabbed hold of the dog’s leash. “I shouldn’t have let you go right away. You need to get your bearings first.”

Tony held Jax close and studied the dog as it moved clumsily around, sniffing everything. “What’s going on with him?”

“He developed cataracts young,” she said. “He’s almost completely blind. His owner tried to return him to his breeder, but they didn’t want him back. So they brought him here.”

Kayla’s eyes widened. “For being blind? You’re kidding!” She reached for the dog and rubbed his large block of a head, and he graced her with a sloppy kiss.

“Can I pet him?” Jax asked.

“I mean, sure, he’s gentle as a lamb, in the sense that he’s not aggressive. But he’s pretty high energy.”

Kayla lifted an eyebrow. “Maybe on a par with a four-year-old boy?” she asked.

“I guess. He can knock you over if he bowls into you, and he does that pretty often. He requires a lot of grooming, too.”

Jax grabbed the dog around the neck and clung on, and Tony and Kayla both jumped to intervene. “Gentle, buddy,” Tony scolded, his heart pounding at the sight of Jax so close to the big dog’s teeth.

“Oh, don’t worry, Paddington loves affection,” the worker said, and the dog proved it by licking Jax’s face until he giggled.

Tony knelt in front of the dog and studied him, noting the cloudy white color of his pupils, running his hands over soft, wild fur. “He’s good with kids, do you think? Have there been any problems with them?”

“We haven’t seen him interact with any kids visiting the shelter yet, but I do know that the family that had him before had kids. He’s used to them. In fact...” The worker stopped talking.

“What?” Tony looked up.

“Nothing. We’re not supposed to say anything about the people who drop off their dogs here.”

“It’s hard to believe they were able to get rid of this guy,” Kayla said. She’d progressed to rubbing his sides and showing Jax how to scratch behind his ears. The dog flopped to the floor and turned onto his back, his tongue lolling out of the side of his mouth.

“Pet his belly real gently,” Kayla explained. “Like this.”

Jax followed suit, carefully petting the dog’s pink belly. His smile was huge.

“He seems great with Jax,” Kayla said. “Were the kids in his original family this young?”

“One was,” the worker said. She hesitated, then added, “The kids were the only ones who were upset about dropping him off. Mom and Dad were cold, but the kids couldn’t stop crying.”

Kayla’s forehead wrinkled and her mouth turned down. “How sad.”

“It was. They said they were going to get another dog, one that didn’t have anything wrong with him. The kids just kept bawling.” She swallowed. “They wanted to keep Paddington.”

“That’s terrible!” Kayla glanced down at Jax and bit her lip, obviously stopping herself from saying more so as not to upset Jax. But he was rolling and playing with Paddington, apparently oblivious to their conversation.

Tony and Kayla looked at each other over the squirming mass of dog and little boy. That gaze communicated everything: neither one of them would ever put children through that if there were any way around it.

There was a sound outside the little room, people walking by, and Paddington let out a deep, loud bark that made them all start, then laugh.

“He doesn’t bark a lot, but when he does, it’s loud,” the worker said. “Do you think you might take him? I gotta be up front. He’ll be a lot of work. He hasn’t had much training, and he’s likely to lose what vision he has. He’s also likely to grow some more, according to the vet. These big breeds take a while to mature.”

Jax held the dog’s head and looked into his eyes. “We’ll take you home, Paddington. You can ’tect me real good.”

That was likely. Most thieves or intruders would be intimidated by Paddington’s size and loud bark, even though from the looks of things, he’d probably drown bad guys with drooly licks rather than attacking them.

But far more important than the guard dog element was the happy expression on Jax’s face as he hugged the Saint Bernard—gently, as instructed—around its burly neck.

“We’ll take him,” Tony said.

Jax’s eyes glowed. “He can be my dog? Really?”

“Really, kiddo.” It felt so good to be able to do this for Jax.

“Yes!” Jax couldn’t contain himself then, jumping and whooping, which made Paddington start to jump and run, too.

“You know, I think this will be a good match,” the kennel worker said.

Kayla was all smiles. “I’m so glad. I think he’ll be a great dog for you. Good choice.”

Her approval, the warmth in her eyes, felt good. Way too good.

Doing all of this together felt too good, as well. Tony needed to be very careful, or Kayla would become part of their growing family.