Illicit Captor by Maggie Cole

27

Scarlet

"What were ya thinking, Scarlet?" Alaina accuses.

I put my hand over my face and groan. "Jesus Christ. Alaina, just stop."

"Stop worrying about ya?"

"Yes!" I uncover my face. "Ya have to stop. I can't take this anymore. It's not your concern!"

"I'm your sister. It's my job to take care of ya!" she insists.

"No, it's not! And this isn't about ya. It's about me. Now either shut up and help me plan my wedding and let me help ya with your baby stuff, or I want nothing to do with ya."

Her eyes widen, and her hurt tone fills the air. "I'm sorry. I-I know what he put ya through."

Anger fills me. It's like seeing Tommy unleashed all my emotions, and I can't hold them back anymore. I cry out, "No, ya don't know what he put me through. And ya don't have a right to stand here and claim ya do."

"She's right." Tully's voice booms into the room.

I glance toward the door. He steps in front of us, adding, "Alaina, none of us know what Scarlet's been through. It may not have been the call ya would've made, but it was made."

"She could have died," Alaina states.

"She didn't."

Tense silence fills the air.

Tully adds, "Now, ya two can sit here and fight while they're gone, or ya can start planning the fun things. And it'll be good for ya to do something non-work-related for once, Alaina."

After a moment, she cautiously asks, "Are ya unhappy with anything I've done, Tully?"

"Of course not. Do ya think I wouldn't have called ya if I didn't approve of how ya were running things here?"

More nerves appear in her expression. It hits me how much pressure she has on her.

I put my arm around her. "You're amazing, Alaina. Truly. But Tully's right. Ya need to have some fun in your life."

"I do have fun," she protests.

Tully and I stare at her.

She tosses her hands in the air. "I do!"

Tully orders, "Then take a breather and have some with your sister. Enjoy this special time ya both have." He takes his cigar out and his lighter.

"Ya can't smoke in here," I remind him.

He groans. "I forgot. Sorry, lass." He points at both of us. "Ya two are sisters. Ya only have each other. You've left everything ya know and entered our family. We're happy to have ya, but ya need to make sure ya work this out. And, Alaina, I know as leaders we think we know what's best, but sometimes we don't. We get so caught up in making decisions, we forget people need to do things we don't understand."

She stays quiet.

"On that note, I'm going to smoke my cigar on your porch," he adds, shaking his head and leaving the room.

More tension fills the air.

Alaina grabs my hand. In a soft voice, she says, "I just want to make sure you're okay. When ya were gone, ya don't understand how much I missed ya. Every day I worried about ya. And...and for months, I thought ya were dead. I...I grieved ya. And it was my fault." Tears fall down her cheeks.

I pull her into a hug. "Ya have to stop blaming yourself. It wasn't your fault."

"It was."

"Ya couldn't have done anything to stop what happened with Da and Tommy."

She insists, "I could have. When ya were in London, I should have sent ya away from there. I should have done something."

"And they would've found me. Ya know they would've. It would've only temporarily put off what happened."

"We don't know that."

I sigh. "We do. But this isn't your battle, Alaina. It's not your scar to carry, and it's not your nightmare to relive."

She tilts her head and squeezes my hand tighter. "Are ya having nightmares?"

My pulse creeps up. I reprimand myself for mentioning them and try to play it off. I shrug, admitting, "Only when Aidan's not with me."

Sympathy and guilt take over her expression. "I'm sorry."

"Please stop apologizing. I don't want to keep doing this, but I needed to confront Tommy," I admit.

"But why? I don't understand."

I groan. "Ya, of all people, should understand, Alaina. Ya don't back down from anybody. You're the strong one. Maybe for once in my life, I wanted to be strong."

"You're the strongest person I know," she states.

I sarcastically laugh. "No, I'm not. I've always been your little sister. I'm the one who took the back seat. I was never brave like ya."

She claims, "No, ya are, Scarlet. Ya just don't realize it."

I take a moment to gather my thoughts, then state, "I'm tired of ya punishing Aidan for making decisions on our behalf or letting me do what I need to do. I'm tired of the fighting and constant battle between ya and him. I love him. I want to marry him. He rescued me. Nobody else did. And I'm not saying that so ya feel guilty, but why can't ya trust that he has my best interests at heart?"

She blurts out, "I don't want Tommy ever in front of ya again."

"He's not going to be," I say in a firm voice, lifting my chin. I hate that Aidan's leaving, and he has to chase after him, putting himself in a dangerous situation. Yet I realize Tommy needs to be stopped.

Her angry expression lightens, and she blinks hard.

My sister is more emotional than normal, but I can't keep having her all over Aidan's ass and trying to control me. So I slowly shake my head. "Ya may be in charge of the clan, but we're family. Ya need to figure out how to separate this. What happens between Aidan and me is not your business."

"Everyone in the clan is my business," she objects.

I shake my head. "No. Our decisions aren't yours to make. He's going to be my husband, and if I tell him I need something, he'll decide whether to give it to me or not based on whether he thinks he can keep me safe. Ya need to accept it. And our marital decisions aren't clan business."

Her expression tells me she's struggling with accepting my statement.

I add, "Maybe ya should discuss this with Tully and have him help ya decipher this."

She closes her eyes and puts her hand on her belly. Her face turns pale.

I fret, "I'm sorry. Did I hurt the baby by saying that?"

She grits her teeth and takes short breaths, muttering, "Morning sickness. I'm feeling a little..." She swallows hard. She places her hand on the back of the sofa.

"Come sit down," I direct and lead her around the furniture.

We take a seat. "Can I get ya crackers or something else? Bread? What will help ya?"

She answers, "I just need to breathe for a minute."

I wait for a while.

She finally smiles. "Okay. It passed."

I stare at her. "Are ya sure you're okay?"

She nods. "Yea, it's normal. The doctor assured us."

"Okay, well, do ya want to plan some things with me for the wedding?"

Her face lights up. "Yea, I'd love to."

"Good." I slide my arm around her. "Because ya know you're my matron of honor. If ya want, that is," I quickly add.

She softly laughs. "Of course I want to!"

"Good, but ya can't glare at Aidan the whole time."

She laughs harder. "I promise. I won't glare at him on the wedding day. Well, maybe I shouldn't promise that. I mean, if he starts anything with me—"

"Alaina," I reprimand.

She holds her hands in the air. "I'm teasing."

I arch my eyebrows to make sure.

"I am. I'm actually happy for ya. I can see how much Aidan loves ya and how happy ya are when he's around."

"I am. And I'm happy ya found Brody too."

"He's so good to me, Scarlet."

I smile. "Yea, I can see that. It's weird, isn't it? Us with O'Connor men?"

She nods. "Yea, but thank God we are. I'm so glad I'm not an O'Leary anymore." Disgust fills her expression.

Her sentiment is mine. I admit, "I can't wait to be an O'Connor."

"Agreed."

I rise. "Ya might not be hungry, but I am, so let's get some food."

She stands, and we stroll to the dining room.

Tully's inside and booms, "Ladies, glad ya could join me. I was getting lonely." He winks, gets up, and pulls two chairs out.

We sit and spend over an hour eating with Tully, discussing the wedding and the baby.

The confusion I always feel around Tully returns. I realize how much I really like him. It's odd. My da was so cold, and Tully holds the same power he did. I expected him to be the same, but he's not. He's funny and nothing but warm to Alaina and me.

I blurt out, "Why are ya so nice to us?"

He freezes for a moment, then takes a cigar out and runs his thumb over it.

"Ya can't smoke that in here," Alaina reminds him.

"Calm down, darling. I'm not," he claims, then looks back at me.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked ya that."

"Lass, ya can ask me whatever ya want. And to answer your question, it's not your fault ya were born into that situation. What your family did to ya was wrong. I can't imagine doing anything like that to my blood. But both of ya made a choice. Ya chose to leave the clan. Ya chose to not accept their ways. And I'll tell ya this. I'm more than happy to bring ya into the O'Connor clan and that we're going to take care of ya for the rest of your life."

I blink hard, but a tear escapes, and I swipe at it.

He adds, "You're good lasses. Ya both have amazing talents and traits, and it's a shame that your own blood couldn't recognize all your gifts."

I scoff. "I think ya have me confused with my sister. Alaina's the one with all the talent."

She protests, "No, I'm not!"

Tully chuckles. "You're a spitfire, Scarlet, just like your sister. Ya got more of her in ya than ya know. And aye, ya lasses are different, but ya both can do whatever ya set your minds to. And we probably shouldn't bring this up, but I need to say something about ya confronting Tommy."

My gut drops. "I'm sorry. Please don't be mad at Aidan. I begged him."

Tully holds his hand up. "Scarlet, I'm not going to lecture ya."

"You're not?"

"No. That took a lot of courage. More balls than most of our men would have, and I hate to admit that."

I stay quiet, my stomach flipping.

He asks, "Did ya get what ya needed from it?"

My stomach quivers, thinking about staring at Tommy earlier today. I slowly shrug, confessing, "A part of it, I guess. I don't know. I still don't understand why I needed to do it, but I did."

Tully glances at Alaina. "Do ya mind leaving us alone for a moment?"

She looks at him in surprise but doesn't argue. "Sure." She leaves the room and closes the door.

My nerves skyrocket. I ask, "Am I in trouble?"

He chuckles again. "Lass, ya need to stop thinking you're in trouble or that I have anything but good intentions for ya. Okay?"

I release an anxious breath. "Okay."

He hesitates for a moment, studying me.

I admit, "You're making me really nervous, Tully."

He carefully chooses his words stating, "There's a therapist I'd like ya to talk to."

My mouth turns dry. "A therapist?"

He nods. "Aye. She's helped some women I know who dealt with similar things ya did."

I insist, "I'm fine. I'm with Aidan. Everything's good. I'm protected."

He keeps his intent gaze on me.

I lift my chin higher, my insides quivering harder, my chest tightening, and suddenly more emotional than I want to be. I start blinking and have to look away.

He gets up and sits next to me. "Scarlet."

I turn to him.

He continues, "Lass, you've been through a lot. I'm glad ya confronted Tommy, but I want ya to talk to a therapist."

"It's not necessary."

"Humor me. Just one time. If ya talk to her and want to meet again, then great. If ya never want to see her again, then that's your call. But humor an old man and give her one session."

"It's not necessary," I restate.

"I think it is, lass," he claims.

More tears fall. I swipe at them, wishing I could control them. My voice shakes as I declare, "I'm fine."

"No one's saying you're not fine. But I believe it will be helpful for ya to talk to her."

"I don't want to discuss Tommy or anything he put me through."

"Ya don't have to if ya meet her and don't want to talk, but at least sit down with her," he pushes.

I ponder speaking about things with a stranger, when I've barely told Aidan.

"Give her five minutes," he says.

I tilt my head. "So ya want me to have therapy, but have ya ever had it?"

"No. Do I need therapy?" he questions.

"Probably. I'm sure you've done a lot more bad stuff than I have."

His lips twitch. "I can assure ya, I've done way worse things than ya have, but this isn't about anything you've done. It's about what's been done to ya."

I turn my head again, my face heating, clenching my jaw, hating the shame filling me.

Tully declares, "If ya talk to her once, I'll never ask ya about this again. I'll leave ya alone."

His offer sounds nonthreatening, but I still can't contemplate if I can talk to a stranger about anything related to Tommy and me.

Tully adds, "Everything will be confidential. She won't even tell me, if you're worried about that."

"I should have been able to stop things," I blurt out, staring at my hands.

He grabs them and squeezes. "Nothing he did to ya was your fault. Ya couldn't have stopped him. But this is why I want ya to talk to my friend."

"She's your friend?"

"Aye."

I tilt my head. "What kind of friend?"

"What do ya mean?" he questions.

"I don't know. Is she your girlfriend? Or do ya have a bunch of mistresses? What's your personal life like, Tully?"

His face freezes.

I continue babbling. "And what's your type? Do ya date really, really young women? Do ya date older women? I'm just curious."

Amusement and a bit of uncomfortableness cross his expression.

But once I start, I can't stop. I ask, "Ya do date, right?"

He chuckles really hard.

"What's so funny?" I question.

"Scarlet, ya really are a spitfire. But let's get back to the therapist. Will ya meet with her?"

I take another moment, then ask, "It means a lot to ya?"

He nods. "Aye. It does."

"Then I'll tell ya what, Tully. I'll meet with your friend for one session. I won't guarantee anything past that, but ya have to play Would Ya Rather with me."

He arches his eyebrows. "What's that?"

"I ask ya a question and then ya have to answer. It's harmless. Don't worry."

He arches an eyebrow. "Why do I feel like I'm being tricked?"

"No one can trick ya, Tully. Don't be scared," I taunt.

He takes the cigar and tosses it on the table. "Okay, fine. Let's play this game of yours. Then I'm setting up the meeting."

My stomach churns at the thought of the therapist, but a deal is a deal. So I ask, "Would ya rather date someone your age or forty years younger?"

"Do I really have to answer that?" he questions.

I stifle a giggle. "Is it hard to answer?"

He nods. "Aye. I can't answer that."

"Ya have to answer it."

"I can't. I love all women. That's the problem, Scarlet. All ages."

"Ya find women your age as beautiful as women in their…what? Twenties? Thirties? I don't know your age."

He picks up his cigar and taps it on the table. "Aye. There's an intellectual stimulation for me as well as physical."

I lean closer. "Intellectual like ya want a professor, maybe? She could wear those cute cat-eyed glasses." I wiggle my eyebrows.

He chuckles, and his face turns a little red. "I wouldn't be opposed to that. Do ya have someone in mind for me?"

"No, but I can stay on the lookout for ya if ya want."

He chuckles again. "Aye, ya do that for me. Let me know when ya find her."

"Okay. I will! Now, would ya rather date two women at once or one woman? Or"—I glance behind me, even though we're alone, then lower my voice— "would ya rather have them both at once?"

His face turns red, and he chuckles again. He declares, "One."

"Really!" I exclaim.

"Why do ya sound surprised, lass?"

"I don't know. I kind of expected ya to have a harem."

He laughs so hard it turns into a cough. I hand him a glass of water, and he takes several mouthfuls. Then he asks, "A harem? Ya think I have a harem of women?"

I shrug. "I think ya could pull it off. Maybe ya could keep the cigars out of the bedroom though. That'd probably choke them to death."

He groans. "What's with everyone in this house hating on my cigars?"

"It's gross. Ya should quit. Your cough is bad," I point out.

He scrubs his face. "All right, Scarlet, I'll take your advice into consideration. Now, I'm sorry to tell ya this, but your game is over. I'll set up a time for my friend to come over, but right now, I'm going to the porch and smoking my cigar in peace. You're killing me, spitfire."

I grab his cigar. "But this would be a really great time to quit. Think about it. Ya could be over your addiction before the baby comes. Maybe even before our wedding!"

He rises and grabs it out of my hand. "Never happening. I'll die with a cigar in my hand."

"Yuck. That's so gross!"

Arrogance washes over him. "The women who love me have never complained." He winks.

I groan and put my hand over my face.

He puts his hand on my shoulder.

I look up.

"I'm glad you're going to talk to my friend."

"Only for five minutes," I insist.

"Or maybe more," he says and winks.

He starts to leave, and I blurt out, "Will ya give me away for the wedding?"

He freezes.

"Sorry, maybe I shouldn't have asked that. I don't know why I did." My face heat again.

He turns, grinning. "Of course I will. I'd be honored."

"Ya would?"

"Aye. Really honored. It's been nice having more daughters in the family. Now I really do need to get to the porch."

I point to the door. "Go on, then. Get on with it."

He leaves, and I sit back in the chair. I take a few deep breaths. I'm not looking forward to talking to his friend, but part of me wonders if maybe it could help me.