The Wrong Wife by Maya Alden
Chapter 41
Declan
Like a pathetic teenager, I read her texts again and again.
I was being careful with the Hartleys. I kept Viv at an arm's distance and was evasive about future plans. The FBI were working diligently with Raya’s team to build evidence against Julien. The board meeting was in a few days, and we needed all our ducks in a row before that meeting.
Instead of going to the apartment in the office building where I was staying because the penthouse reminded me too much of Esme, and it was fucking torture to be there, I decided to go on a drive. The driver didn't comment when I asked him to drive me to Mark's building and park in the dark. Mark was on the eighth floor, so it wasn't like I could genuinely stalk her—but this was creepy I knew, and if the driver knew any better; he'd have told me to get my head out of my ass and go talk to my wife, or go home, drink a bottle of Scotch, and fall unconscious.
I called Mark, and it went straight to voicemail. I got a text from him: At the hospital. Urgent?
I responded no because he didn't need to tell me how my wife was doing and if she was crying or smiling or missing me as much as I was.
Mark, who had gotten to know me quite well in the past three weeks because I called him every day, sometimes twice a day to hear about Esme, texted back: You both need your head examined.
No kidding.
I reread her messages and was tempted to text her and tell her to come down and join me in the car. I could make her come again as I had so many times, right here. I could hold her again. Smell that jasmine goodness of hers.
Fuck, Dec, you're an idiot; go home before you lose your mind.
When I got back to the office building, security hailed me. "Your…ah…girlfriend is in your place."
I looked at him blankly. "Who?"
He looked uncomfortable. "Your…I don't know who she is anymore. She's the one you were going to marry, and then you married her sister—so, he first one.
He looked so baffled that I smiled in sympathy. "Imagine how I'm feeling."
"No thanks. I got one wife and one ex, and that's enough drama for a lifetime."
I took the elevator to the apartment, feeling weary. I didn't have the energy to deal with Viv. One more week, and I could get rid of her. One more week…and the chips will fall as they may. Whether Knight Tech took a massive hit in the stock market or not, there was no situation in which Viv would ever be engaged, married, or in any way, except through Esme, be connected to me.
"Where have you been?" Viv demanded. She was sitting on the couch, her laptop open—a glass of wine on a coaster on the table. She’d made herself at home.
I ignored her and threw my backpack on a bar stool by the kitchen counter and went to find a drink. Perversely, I opened a bottle of Chablis that Calliope had started to stock because Esme liked it. I couldn't see her, but I could pretend to taste her. Good lord, I was losing my mind. She'd better return home and make me less crazy—and the sooner, the better. But what if she didn't? What if she never came back? Then I'd go get her. Fine, so she won't fight for me; that's okay; I can fight enough for both of us.
But I knew that would work for the short term, but not for a lifetime. Esme would only feel like my equal if she learned to put herself and us first.
"Why are you here, Viv?"
"What do you mean? We're together so…" she trailed off.
"Viv, you left. Why do you want to come back so badly?"
She looked away. "I made a mistake. That doesn't mean I don't love you."
Realization struck like a thunderbolt. "Viv, do you hate Esme so much that you want to marry me?"
She looked at me, and I could see the guilt. "This has nothing to do with her."
I sat down across from her. How had I missed so much about her? She played the all-powerful woman, but beneath it, she didn't have Esme's strength—she was insecure. She'd just found better ways to hide it. Julien may not have physically abused Viv, but he'd raised her and ensured she'd wrap her worth around making him happy.
"How upset was Julien when he found out you married Nick?"
"Daddy has always been supportive of my decisions."
"Viv, did you fall in love with Nick?"
Her eyes clouded for a moment and then cleared. "It was a mistake."
I scoffed. "My god, I thought it was just Esme and Monica he was abusing and controlling. But he's controlling you as well, isn't he?"
"You know nothing about it. Daddy and I are close; he loves me, cares for me, and wants nothing more than my happiness."
She didn't believe it herself. Her father was a narcissist, and they never loved anyone but themselves. I felt sorry for Viv.
"Do you love Nick?"
Her lips trembled, and her eyes filled. "No. I've always loved you."
I nodded, finally understanding Viv and her motivations. She was just as much of a victim as Esme and Monica were. Julien had been manipulating her just like everyone else in his orbit; he’d just found another way to control Viv.
"Did you ever love me?"
"I've always loved you."
I put my glass of wine down on the table between us and not on a coaster. "Here is what I think happened. You and I were having some fun—and then Julien insisted you make the relationship more permanent. The merger was a way for him to profit, but for him to also marry his daughter to someone higher in the socio-economic structure than the Hartleys. Am I right so far?"
She didn't reply; just stared at me.
"You never loved me, Viv. You know that, and now I know that. Do you know how I know that?"
Her eyes filled. She hardly ever showed emotion, not like Esme, whose face was a mirror of what was happening within.
“What did Julien do when he found out you married Nick? Did he beat you like he did Monica?”
"No, of course not."
"If you love Nick, go be with him, Viv. Don't let your father manipulate you."
"Are you drunk?" her voice shook a little. "My father isn't manipulating me. I do as I please, and he supports me."
I crouched down to face her. I took her hands in mine. They were cold.
"Your father is a narcissistic bully. While we were together, it wasn't too bad, but we both knew it wasn't love. You figured it out before I did. And now that you have, can you settle for less?"
Tears started to roll down her cheeks. I wiped them and felt nothing but compassion for Viv. At least Esme was allowed to wear her scars on the outside; Viv had had to keep them within.
"If you love Nick. Be with him. I'm assuming with the way your phone keeps blowing up with messages from him, and the fact that you haven't blocked him means that it's not over."
"It’s over," Viv said unhappily. "I'm with you now."
"No, Viv. We're not together. We've never been."
She started to sob, and I took her in my arms. I stroked her back and crooned softly, telling her it would all work out.
She cried for a long while and it took two shots of whiskey to loosen her up enough, so she’d confide in me.
"He never hit me," she admitted. "But…it was always there, wasn't it, the threat. I was his favorite. I liked that. I had no one. Esme had her mother. I only had Daddy."
I held her hand as she spoke.
"I do love Nick, and he…still wants me back, Dec. But I don't know if I can do this."
"Sure, you can."
"But what about the merger?"
"The hell with the merger. When did business and money become more important than people?"
She looked at me in disbelief. "Since always, Dec. Since the dawn of time, power has been important. You can lose a lot of money."
"Then so be it. We'll rebuild. It's not the end of the world, you know."
"You fell in love with Esme, didn't you?" There was no accusation in her tone, just understanding.
"I did."
"And she fell in love with you. I could see that. I wanted to hurt her. Since she came into our lives, I've always felt she was the enemy who could take my life away from me." She looked at our hands and then into my eyes. "I'm not going to change overnight."
"No one is asking you to. I'm only asking you to do the right thing. Can you?"
She thought about it for several long minutes. "I love my father, Dec."
"And if he loves you back, he'll love you no matter who you're with, what your job is. Love is accepting people for who they are, not asking them to change. Love is making someone more than they can be, not less."
She nodded slowly. "We had some good times, didn't we?"
"Yes, yes, we did. We're better friends than lovers, Viv. You can learn to be friends rather than compete with Esme. Trust me, she doesn't have a mean bone in her body and would have no idea how to contend with you and wouldn't want to."
She laughed through her tears. "You're not going to sign those annulment papers, are you?"
"No."
"And what if my father makes her divorce you?"
"Then I’ll be heartbroken and do what I can to win her back."
"And you don't mind that the company will lose money if that happens?”
I shrugged. “It’s just money. We’ll make more or make do with less.”
"Is she worth it?"
I smiled, thinking of Esme. "Oh yes, she is."