All the Wrong Choices by C.A. Harms

Chapter Two

Danielle

I lie in my bed,facing Addison, who is lying opposite me. The sun has set, and after several unanswered calls and knocks, we've finally been left alone. I don't want to see anyone, and I don't want to hear their pity.

I'm humiliated enough as it is. Thankful I hadn't moved everything into Matthew's house yet, but knowing many things were already there. Figuring out how to get everything back without having to face him will be a challenge. I know I can't take seeing his face; I've always had a weakness for Matthew and his charm. He knew just what to say and when to say it to make me agree to about anything.

I'd given him my heart, and he'd destroyed it.

"What do you want to do?" Addison asks through the darkness. "Do you want to hire a hitman? Go find them both and hogtie them, then we can take them to a desert somewhere and leave them there to be feasted on by all the hungry creatures who lurk in the night."

"You're insane," I mumble into my pillow.

"No, I'm loyal and extremely pissed." She is loyal, thoughtful, caring, and I could go on and on.

"You're the most loyal person in my life." I turn my head so I can see her more clearly. "Maybe I should have just married you."

"Sure," she nods, scrunching her lips a little as if thinking over the idea. "We can do that, but no sex. It'll have to be a sexless marriage, and it will have to be an open marriage too. I mean, babe, I love you something fierce, and you are hot, but I like men. I mean, I love men and sweets you do not have the goods I'm in the market for." I start to speak, but she holds up her hand to stop me. "And before you say the words strap on, I will stop you right there and say it's not the same."

Unable to control it, I laugh, and it feels wrong. "How would you know?"

"Do you remember that guy, Mario," she widens her eyes. "He had this thing he liked where I—"

"Stop," I laugh even harder, shaking my head quickly. "No more."

Laughing feels odd, like I should be a blubbering mess after what I've been through, but I can't help it. Addison always makes me feel better, even if for only a short time. I can always count on her to lift my spirits.

"We should go on your honeymoon."

"What?"

She flops onto her back and props up her head on the pillow that is between us. "Seriously," she stares over at me, "he paid for a trip for two to Riviera Maya, all-inclusive, five nights in a resort, from what I've seen, has absolutely everything you could need and then some. Why should it go to waste? We can enjoy ourselves with no limits on his dime. You know, kind of like a fuck you to your piece of shit ex."

I stare at her, wondering if she's gone crazy.

"The trip is in your name, right, all the insurance and everything?"

"Yes," I say with hesitation.

"Okay, so we cash in the insurance on the second ticket, roll over the money to pay for me, and the difference left I'll cover myself. It's still going to be mostly on Matthew, and I think you deserve a getaway. We can relax by the pool, flirt with guys, and drink until we pass out."

"Men are the last thing on my mind." I'm not sure I'll ever waste my time on the opposite sex again. Well, beyond scratching a particular itch, but even that at this point is far, far off.

"Okay then, I'll flirt, and you can drink."

The idea of disappearing for a while, avoiding the stares of everyone, and the whispers sounds appealing. The way I'm feeling now, I'd either kill someone or cry uncontrollably, and neither sounded like a great outcome.

"Get your laptop," I direct, and within seconds she is up off the bed and practically sprinting out to the living room where her bag is. I can hear her bare feet slapping against the hardwood as she comes hurrying down the hallway to my room and bounces back on the bed like an excited middle schooler.

"Are we doing this?" She asks with contagious giddiness.

"Yeah," I sit up and take the computer from her, waking it up, "I think we are."

Another thirty minutes pass and one phone call to the airlines, everything is set. I've gathered all the information I need to rearrange the flight itinerary. Instead of me and Matthew leaving tomorrow morning, Addison and I will be flying out tomorrow, late afternoon.

I know this isn't a fix, honestly with how I'm feeling, I don't think the heaviness in my chest will ever pass. I still feel like I'm stuck in a nightmare, and I'll wake up soon to find it's my wedding day, and I'm just experiencing the pre-ceremony jitters.

But the truth is I'm living a nightmare, one I know I can't run from, and one day I'll be forced to face.

I'm the pathetic girl left at the altar by a man who was supposed to love her. Hell, I didn't even make it to that point. I'm the deserted bride, and I know that shit will follow me forever.

* * *

There'sa knock on my door, and I yell out from my bedroom, telling Addison to come in. Surprised so much time has passed and wondering how Addison had gotten ready so quickly. We only had a little over an hour before we need to be at the airport.

"I'm almost ready," I assure her rolling my suitcase and heaving my carry-on bag onto my shoulder as I began walking down the hallway. Rambling on about if I'd packed the correct shoes, I came to an abrupt halt when I find Matthew standing in my apartment. Wearing the dress shirt I bought him for his birthday last month, paired with the jeans I've always said he looks the best in. His hair is in the same disordered style it always is like he's just climbed out of bed and ran his fingers through it. He is attractive, and even though the anger is still boiling inside me, I can't deny that fact.

"Hey Dani," he has the gall to appear sad, tucking his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels. "Can we talk?"

"I have nothing to say to you." I have a million and one things I can say, but nothing will fix what he's done, so what is the point.

"We had four years together; I think we owe it to ourse—"

"I don't owe you a damn thing, except maybe to back over you with my car." A bit dramatic, maybe, but I've earned the right. My voice rises uncontrollably, and I throw down my carry-on as I take a step closer to him, feeling the aftermath of everything he's put me through in the last twenty-four hours. "You left me at the church so you could run off with my sister, Matthew." I will not cry; he doesn't deserve my tears. "The same sister I asked you if something was going on with less than six months ago. You could have ended it so many times before, been honest when I asked and told me that you two had been screwing around behind my back. But instead, you let me plan some sham of a wedding, you let me go to that damn church, and you allowed all those guests to arrive, so what, so you could humiliate me?"

I push against his chest, and he doesn't budge.

"How long?" I scream, feeling myself break a little more. "How long have you been screwing my sister?"

He grabs my wrists and holds me close, the same scent I am so familiar with hitting me when I collide with his chest. "Dani, I'm sorry," I try to pull away. "I never meant for it to happen."

But it did!

"Just leave," I mumble, unable to control the tears pooling in my eyes. I don't want to do this; I don't have the strength.

"Dani," he brings his lips to my cheek, and for a few seconds I lean into him, remembering what it's like to be us. The sweet, gentle kisses, the way he'd hold me close and pretend to care. He's familiar, and I feel so vulnerable and so broken that accepting the offered comfort is almost like my world has not recently fallen apart around me. For a minute, I can pretend he's chosen me.

"Baby," hearing him offer the same endearment he did so many times before when attempting to soothe me after making me feel like shit only feels like an ice-cold bucket of water has been dumped over my head.

I push back, placing distance between us, and the sound of me smacking his face echoes around the apartment.

He looks shocked. I'm shocked!

This person is not me; I'm not a violent person. I sure as hell am not this cold. But he's made me this way; he left me feeling empty and used, he forced me to question every aspect of my life, and I hate him for it.

"Get out," this time, I put everything I have behind the push, and he stumbles a little from the impact. "You make me sick." I feel physically nauseous picturing him with my sister while also being with me. He's been living a double life. "You and Cathryn deserve one another."

I feel murderous; my hands shake as I fist them, and my heart is racing.

"You have a lot of nerve showing up here." Matthew looks behind him to find Addison standing there, looking as angry as I feel. I know without a doubt in my mind that given a chance, she would push him in front of a speeding car and not shed a tear.

Matthew looks at me and then Addison before settling back on me. "I really am sorry, Dani," and with that, he turns and walks away, leaving me feeling broken and defeated all over again.