Dirty Toe Drag by Toni Aleo

Chapter Twenty

Wes

The relief isall over Aiden’s face, and to be honest, I feel him. Deeply. It’s been a long few days, waiting for the results. Of course, Aiden doesn’t accept anything but the best, so they made sure to go to Vanderbilt for a specialist. Perks of being a hockey player’s wife—and general manager of the team—Shelli got in pretty quickly. Thankfully, because I don’t think Aiden could have handled a wait.

“They thought the baby had spina bifida, but it was a shadow from something else. Or at least, that’s what they’re saying now. Shelli is convinced the girl didn’t know what she was talking about. She was new, and I think they were trying to cover up her mistake. But nevertheless, the baby is healthy, and things are normal.”

I let out a long breath, like him, relief flooding me. Boon mirrors us, but unlike me, he is actually able to tape up his shin guards and get ready for our game. We lost Monday, but we’re hoping for a comeback tonight. Everyone is in high spirits since after, we have two days off. Plus, it’s a Friday and Saturday, and that hasn’t happened since November. It also means we’re about to go on one hell of a road trip. Eight games. It’s going to be a doozy, and I’m going to miss the shit out of Stella.

“That’s absolutely insane and so fucking scary, dude,” I say, shaking my head. “I’m glad the baby is okay.”

“Hell yeah. That’s some shit,” Boon says, moving on to his other leg. “I don’t know how you guys got any sleep.”

“I didn’t. I made Shelli sleep, but I couldn’t. I was scared shitless. Hell, I’m still scared,” Aiden admits, and the fear is still all over his face. “What if they read it wrong again and something is up? I’d rather know now and prepare.”

“I’d feel the same,” I agree, but I don’t think Aiden hears me.

“This parent shit is wack, and the kid isn’t even here yet. Also, I didn’t realize how Shelli’s emotions feed into mine. I was carrying her fear, my fear, my parents’… It was terrifying.”

I can’t imagine. “I bet, dude. But hey, it’s all good. Baby is good. Shelli is good. Everything is good.”

He nods, but I can see the apprehension on his face. Pretty sure I’d be the same. Worse probably. When Boon is dressed, he gets up to stretch in his gear. He’s the only one I know to do this, but then, we’re all odd like that. We all have our own quirks when it comes to pregame. Aiden always goes left-to-right when it comes to putting on his stuff. I go right-to-left, and I also don’t tape until everything is on. Aiden and Boon tape as they go. We’re a bunch of weirdos, but hey, it works for us.

“Hey, did you want to get lunch tomorrow?” Aiden asks then, and my heart stops in my chest. I hate to say it, but I’m scared to tell him. Not that I wasn’t before, but things are so good between Stella and me. We spend the days texting, and when she works, I go to Brooks to hang out. If she’s not working, we go out.

It’s been fantastic, and I’d hate for Aiden to ruin that. The problem is, everyone else in his family knows—well, not his brother, but I haven’t seen that dude in months. Asher is a private person anyway, and also, I haven’t been to any family events for Aiden in a while. That’ll change this weekend for the gender reveal. Not that I plan on telling Asher or anything. That would be weird.

“I actually have therapy tomorrow and plans with my girlfriend,” I say slowly, and his brows rise. Even Boon looks back at me.

“Girlfriend?” Boon asks, the side of his mouth quirking up.

“When did this happen?” Aiden asks, grinning from ear to ear.

“Monday,” I say as I tape my elbow pads on. “We were going to wait a bit to put a label on it, but she’s… Dude, she’s just exceptional.”

Aiden sputters with laughter, and Boon grins fully at me. “Exceptional?”

“I need to meet this exceptional girl,” Aiden laughs.

“For real. Anyone who can make Wes use words like exceptional must be close to perfect,” Boon throws at me.

I grin, nodding. “She is.”

They both send me a grin, but then Josef leans in, fully ready for the game in all his pads. “Is your sister still off-limits? Because that girl is exceptional.”

Aiden glares, and I do the same. “Shut up, Jo,” we both say at the same time.

I don’t have to look at Aiden to know he’s eyeing me. I can even feel Boon’s eyes on me, but I ignore them both, taping my leg pad. I don’t know why I did that. I might as well have just said, “Hey, that’s my girlfriend, asshole.”

Josef doesn’t seem to care. He shrugs. “I’m just saying. I’d be good to her.”

“I don’t care. She’s too good for you.”

“You say that about everyone when it comes to Stella,” Boon laughs, and Aiden shoots him a deadpan look.

“Because she is. Not only is she smart, she’s fast on her feet. She’s bigger than this town. She’s going to go off to Paris and design clothes for celebrities or something. She’s incredible.”

Okay, now I get why she would be nervous about telling her family about her plans. But then, hearing his words, I know Aiden loves her and would support whatever she wants. I just hope she realizes that and owns up to her dreams. Stella deserves that. She deserves the world. But of course, I’m overthinking Aiden’s statement. She is bigger than this town, and she is way too good for anyone. Especially me.

Somehow, though, I’ve landed her, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to lose her.

I lick my lips as I lean back in my locker, taking out my phone to text Stella. I inhale, doing my breathing exercises as I type a text to her.

Me: Your brother is talking about you.

Stella: Jeez, about what? And aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for a game?

Me: Aren’t you supposed to be working?

Stella: I am. But when you text, I answer.

Me: Aw, you like me?

Stella: A bit. What’s he saying?

Me: That you’re too good for anyone.

Stella: He’s so over the top. Sometimes I think he’s more protective than my dad.

Me: I don’t know about that.

Stella: LOL, maybe.

Me: He asked me to go to lunch tomorrow, but I’m seeing you.

Stella: You can blow me off, or we can both go.

Me: Nah, I’m good. I’m gonna wait until next week. Get through the gender reveal first. He’s still upset about the ultrasound and all.

Stella: True. And also, that was bullshit. Had everyone freaking out.

Me: Exactly. So, I’m gonna wait it out.

Stella: Okay. Let me know if you want me to do it with you.

Me: I will. Though, I feel weird about it.

Stella: Weird about what?

Me: Not telling him.

Stella: Okay. I don’t know what you want to do here. I support whatever. I just want to be with you, and I want you to be comfortable.

Man, this girl is a godsend.

Me: I know. I’m indecisive and annoying.

Stella: Just a bit.

When she sends the winking emoji, I grin.

Me: What do you think we should do?

Stella: Wait till next week.

I nod. She’s probably right. I hate dragging this out, though. I just want to rip off the Band-Aid. Let it happen and face the repercussions. But what if he is dead set that I can’t be with Stella? What do I do? Do I give up my best friend for a girl? I always said I wouldn’t be that kind of guy, but I’ve never met a girl like Stella before. I feel like exceptional isn’t even the right word for her. She is so kind. So supportive. I had therapy a couple days ago, and she called afterward to make sure I was okay. I was—Noelle is a great therapist, and she spent most of the time apologizing—but Stella was so concerned.

She hasn’t asked anything about my past. Sometimes I think that she doesn’t even want to know or that it doesn’t matter. I worry that I am deceiving her, that I’m holding a huge part of my life away from her, and when she finds out, she’ll run. It really makes me nervous and fearful of what could happen. But on the other hand, I’m sure she’d be supportive. Kind and accepting.

It’s all so much sometimes. When Noelle asked me when I plan on telling Stella, I told her I didn’t know. Because it’s the truth. How do you tell someone that you were molested and are still healing from the trauma of it? Stella probably thinks I’m totally fine, but I haven’t had an episode or anything. Also, how do I tell her I’m terrified to have sex with her because I don’t want to start using her to avoid feeling the pain of my trauma? Fuck, it’s so overwhelming. I just want to be a good man. I want to be a good partner. I want to fucking heal and be who I know I can be.

I look down at my phone, tapping it to see the picture of Stella and me on the bike. We still haven’t bought one for ourselves, but we have been crazy busy. Maybe this summer. But that’s not why I’m looking at us. I love this picture because I’m truly happy in it. Her skin is pressed to mine, her body in my arms—I’ve never in my life felt so complete. I don’t want to lose that feeling. I don’t want to lose her.

I go back to our text thread.

Me: I miss you.

I fully expect her to tease me, but instead, she types back almost immediately.

Stella: I miss you.

Oh, my body sings for her.

Me: What are you doing tonight?

Stella: Working and then going home.

Me: Do you have school tomorrow?

Stella: No, I’m skipping to work at the shop on Aiden and Shelli’s cake and cupcakes. I finished my assignments today, so I’m good. I plan on being there all day.

I bite my lip. I don’t know if I trust myself, but I don’t want to be alone tonight. I want to be with her.

Stella: Why? Everything okay?

Me: I wanna see you.

Stella: I would love that.

Me: Wanna meet up at my place? Stay the night? Nothing sexual, just a sleepover.

Stella: LOL, what if I want a sexy sleepover?

I can’t help but grin as my body explodes with heat.

Me: I gotta tell Aiden first, baby. So bring your ugliest PJs.

Stella: LOL. Sorry, I’ll have to wear something of yours.

Me: Oh, that’s not fair.

Stella: And I’ll need to borrow a toothbrush.

Me: Still not fair. You’re killing me.

Stella: See you tonight. Good luck.

Me: Thanks, baby.

She sends me a heart, an eggplant, and then a peach emoji.

Honestly, how the hell am I supposed to survive with this girl?

* * *

HaveI mentioned that I hate the Wild?

Or maybe I just hate their star player, Roocie?

Though, his sister did not hate me one bit.

Not that I’m thinking of her now. Nope. I’m too worried about trying to score and helping my team win. We’re down by only one, and I know we can win this. We have to win this since Roocie won’t shut the fuck up. Bastard.

We line up, waiting for the ref to drop the puck.

“How’s the nose?”

“As good as your sister was in bed,” I answer, pressing my body into his. He jabs me in the side, and I do the same to him.

“I can rebreak it, you know.”

“And I could fuck your sister again,” I say simply, and I hate that I feel bad for saying it. I know it’s just trash talk, but all I can think is someone talking about Stella like that. I’d lose my goddamn mind. Aiden would kill someone—hell, I’d help.

“You motherfuck—”

He tries, but the puck drops, and I shove off him to get to the net. He follows me, trying to push me out of the way of their goalie, but my goal is the screen so a defensemen can pound a puck to the back of the net. Unfortunately, Tanner sends it wide. But thankfully, the rebound goes on Aiden’s blade. Though, he sends it wide too. Can someone hit the fucking net? I dig into the ice, heading to the boards, but of course, Roocie is on my ass. He slams his body into mine, fighting me for the puck. We’re throwing elbows and beating into each other but in a way that won’t get called.

I finally win it, sending it up the boards to Tanner, but the bastard-ass puck bounces over his stick, so he has to retreat fast.

As I rush to the bench for a line change, Roocie says, “Fuck you, McMillan.”

The adrenaline is running hard, and I grin over at him. “I think she said, ‘Fuck me harder, Wes.’”

Some of the guys hear me and chuckle as I go through the door, sitting down beside Boon. He rolls his eyes as he hands me my water bottle. “Are you mad the bruising is wearing off? Need your badass look back?”

I snort. “Nah. I just hate that guy.”

“I think—and I could be wrong—the feeling is mutual.”

I grin as I lean on the boards, watching our boys fight for a goal. When it’s time for our line to go back out, we jump over the boards and head to our zone for the puck drop. I don’t know why the Wild is pairing this dick with me, but whatever. Bring it. Roocie lines up beside me, his eyes full of anger and malice, but I ignore him. I’m on a mission. We need a goal, and if I can beat him to the puck and score, I’ll be winning all day long.

The Wild win the puck, and Aiden chases after it while our defense guards the net. I chase Roocie, making sure he doesn’t have a shot. His teammate sends it toward him, but it’s a wide pass, and it ends up on my blade.

Oh, fuck yeah.

I take off, and when I say I take off, I might as well be a bullet from a gun. I hear the crowd losing their minds at my breakaway, and I’d be damned if I’m gonna let them down. The goalie is ready, though; I can see it in his eyes. He thinks he’s going to beat me, but he doesn’t know my moves.

Hell, call me Jagger, because here I go.

I deke left, pulling him, and quickly, I drag my toe, using my reach to my advantage and sending the puck into the back of the net.

That’s fucking right. The crowd loses their shit as my boys wrap me up in a large hug.

“Man, that was dirty!”

“Sick, man!”

“Attaway, Mc!”

I don’t like the nickname Mc, but hey, I just scored. He could call me “dumbass,” and I couldn’t come down from my high. As I skate to the bench, Roocie is glaring at me.

“Man, I can score on you and your sister. Must be hard being you.”

“Fuck you,” he calls at me. “Or maybe I’ll fuck your mom.”

Now, I deserved that, and while I see red, I’m proud that I only whack him in the shins with my stick.

I hear the whistle almost immediately—and then my number with a slashing call—as Roocie laughs, obviously happy with himself for getting under my skin. But I don’t care.

I head to the box, my head held high, because I didn’t beat the fuck out of him.

Yes, I resorted to violence, but it wasn’t near what I’m used to doing.

And I call that growth.

Go me.