Heartless Savage by Ivy Blake

Chapter Twenty

Megan

I had been distracted for the last few days, regardless of whether I was at home or at school. Austin hadn’t been in and I assumed it had something to do with his stepdad. Even though we sent texts to each other throughout the day- mostly memes or suggestions about dirty things we’d down when we next saw each other, there really wasn’t much in-between. We didn’t talk about the shit that was going on with him.

While I respected it, I was still curious and every day when I went outside, I couldn’t help but stare at his house at the end of the street, wondering what his evil stepdad spent his days doing in there.

I’d come to realise that Austin and I were technically dating, a tentative term that I was still getting used to. But since we weren’t seeing anybody else, it only made sense to use that title (according to Sophie). Which meant that it sucked even more that he had moved away, meaning that spontaneous sleepovers were much less likely because I couldn’t bring myself to meet Nate’s family or introduce Austin to my mom.

While Austin hadn’t been at school, Nate and Ross had and since they were his best friends, it was very clearly that they had an idea of what we were getting up to. I nearly had a heart attack the first time that Nate had said “hey” to me as I was walking to my Maths class, his public display of acknowledgment unfamiliar to me.

Even Ross, who I liked considerably less, smiled at me occasionally. I was glad that he and Lola had tired of their little affair because I couldn’t think of anyone I wanted my sister to be with less. While he was one of Austin’s friends and had briefly had a fling with my sister, that didn’t make me like him much more, especially since he was like your stereotypically annoying frat boy, but I decided that I could be civil with him.

“You going or home or to see your boyfriend?”

I looked up from my phone to see Lola standing at the car door. It had been impossible to hide the truth from her with my phone going off so regularly. It hadn’t taken much for her to put the pieces together. I still wasn’t sure how I felt about calling him my boyfriend, that label seemed a bit scary and we technically hadn’t agreed upon it. A fact that Sophie wouldn’t stop bringing up.

“I can drop you off if that’s what you’re asking,” I said, as I tucked my phone away. Austin and I had agreed to a date of sorts. He’d asked me to meet him in the park after school and to be hungry- so I assumed he was bringing food for us both to eat.

“When are you gonna bring him round for Mom to meet?” Lola asked as she buckled her seatbelt.

“Urm, it’s still early days,” I told her, even though it was a half-truth. On one handed I wanted Mom to meet Austin so that she could stop bothering me about my love life. But on the other hand I was nervous about taking that next step so soon. Not to mention the fact that Austin’s stepdad still appeared to live on our street and I imagined that Austin wanted to be as far away from him as possible, which was completely understandable considering the circumstances.

“Watch me plan a surprise party for your birthday and invite him to the house,” teased Lola.

“Fuck that,” I said as I rolled my eyes.

Even though my birthday was coming up, both Lola and I knew a surprise party would never be on the cards. It was literally one of my worst nightmares. I looked sideways at my sister as she looked out the window and smiled to myself. I’d been so caught up in my own little world that I hadn’t realised that she was significantly less mean to me than when we’d first arrived at Valley High and that now we could actually hold a conversation without wanting to kill each other. It was a small difference, but it was still nice, nonetheless.

“What do you want to do for your birthday?” asked Lola, her eyes lighting up.

“Damn if I knew,” I said with a shrug as we pulled into our driveway. “Do you think I should get changed?” I asked.

“Yes!” exclaimed Lola, “wear something cute, you’re going on a date right?”

“I guess, he just said to meet him in the park-”

“Just because you’ve successfully seduced him- ” Lola pretended to vomit before continuing, “doesn’t mean you should stop trying.”

She was absolutely right, and besides, I was feeling a bit stiff in my blazer and skirt. I texted Austin that I’d be a bit late before having a quick shower and rummaging through my wardrobe for something ‘cute’ to wear. I found a yellow sundress that I’d bought ages ago but barely worn and paired that with a denim jacket and ankle boots. I tied my hair up in a ponytail, allowing some curly tendrils to frame my face before spritzing on my favourite perfume, which I knew Austin was also a fan of, before saying goodbye to Lola.

I decided to walk instead of taking the car because it was a lovely day and the park wasn’t that far away. I pulled out my earphones and turned on my music, deciding to take one out so that I could stay aware of my surroundings.

Since the conversation with the police officer, I realised that I was basically in charge of my own safety. Phone in hand and keys between my knuckles, I walked around the neighbourhood with my eyes peeled, on the lookout for my stalker.

When I arrived at the park, a lovely big green space with lots of trees, I saw Austin rolling out a blanket next to a brown wicker basket. I snuck up behind him, quiet as a mouse.

“Boo!” I said in his ear.

“What the-!” Austin jumped, his arms raised as he turned to see me standing behind him, despite the fact that I was probably the least intimidating person he knew. His worried expression was quickly replaced with a big smile as he bent down to hug me. I melted into his arms and smiled into his chest as we rocked from side to side.

“You didn’t scare me, by the way,” he whispered against my hair.

“Who’s the terrible liar now?” I teased, looking up at him.

Austin smirked at me and planted a light kiss on my mouth before taking my hand in his and leading me to a spot on the blanket. As I got myself comfortable, I noticed that Austin was staring at me, watching my every move and I suddenly got really nervous.

“You look really beautiful,” said Austin with a smile.

“You don’t look too bad yourself,” I teased, when I really wanted to gush about how hot he looked. His button down shirt clung tightly to his athletic body, his hair swept out of his face in that messy, yet sexy, way that I loved.

“You better not be a fussy eater,” said Austin with a fake stern face as he laid out some items from the basket on the blanket.

“You better impress me,” I said hotly as I watched him make my plate.

There were cute little sandwiches, delicious fruits, cheese, chocolate and many more things that made my mouth water. We ate and chatted away together, and I was really glad to be seeing him after what felt like an age, even though in reality it had barely been a week.

“How are things at Nate’s?”

“Alright, obviously things are kinda awkward with his parents and Steven. What with them growing up together and him being an abusive piece of shit,” said Austin matter of factly even though I could tell that what he was saying meant a lot more to him.

“Oh yeah, what’s the situation with Steven?” I asked warily, my curiosity getting the better of me. Austin absentmindedly raised his hand to his neck before blinking and dropping it, as if he was in a trance.

“He was arrested for battery-”

“That’s good news!”

“But then he bailed himself out,” he said shortly before taking a bite into some grapes. My face fell and I was suddenly overwhelmed with sympathy for Austin.

“Bullshit!” I exclaimed.

“What use is the law if you can just buy your way out,right?” Austin shrugged and offered me a grape. I took a bunch and played with them in my hands as I thought about how to comfort him.

“That fucking sucks,” I said finally, realising that there really weren’t many words in the dictionary that would be good right now.

“Hell yeah, it does. But on the bright side he wants nothing to do with me apparently, whatever that means.”

“Are you still scared of him?” Austin’s eyes narrowed and he looked at me as if I’d asked if he still wet the bed.

“I’m not scared of anyone,” he said, his voice faltering as he looked away. Austin stared at a family walking past with their puppy, the kids running to chase it as it went to retrieve a stick.

“I’m not going to judge you,” I said softly, grazing his arm with my hand. “He seems fucking terrifying from what you’ve told me. You don’t have to be strong all the time.” Austin glanced down at me and a sad smile spread across his face.

“Thanks for giving me the permission to be scared,” he said, tapping the tip of my nose.

“You’re very welcome,” I said, scrunching up my face. He laughed and bent down to kiss me, his mouth soft and comforting.

“I’ve missed you at school,” I said truthfully, once we’d stopped kissing.

“Has Max been giving you trouble?” Austin sat up straight, his eyes alert.

“No, not at all!” I said, relieved when he relaxed again. I hated seeing him tense up. “I’ve just missed seeing you.”

“I’ve missed you too, “ Austin said after a moment as he interlaced his fingers with mine. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed the knuckles one by one, his eyes on me the whole time. I shivered with pleasure at the intensely intimate action, allowing myself to ignore everyone else as we sat like this together.

“When are you coming back?”

“Soon,’ he said with a faraway look in his eye.

“I know you need time off to process everything, I get that. But what about your grades, the scholarship, college?” I hated how I sounded like a nagging parent, but I’d found myself invested in Austin’s wellbeing and his future. I knew how badly he wanted to get that scholarship and I wanted to see him achieve his dream.

“Oh I’m still studying don’t you worry.” He flashed me a charming smile. “In fact, I have something for you- if you don’t mind.” Austin reached into the basket again, took out an A4 notebook and passed it to me.

‘A birthday present?” I teased as I flipped open the book. The first few pages were filled with his surprisingly neat handwriting, a variety of essays on the books that we’d studied in our English classes.

Austin’s eyebrows shot up. “It’s not your birthday is it? If I’d known-”

“It’s not today,” I said with a laugh, “it might be next week though, but it’s no biggie.” I said, brushing off his concern.

I didn’t like people fussing over me too much for my birthday. It was a weird amount of attention on one day, simply for being born. Like woah, go me.

“This is great though, you want me to mark these for you?”

“If you have the time, but there’s no pressure.” Austin put his arm around me and pulled me close. “Now about this birthday of yours.” I groaned.

“Nope, you’re not allowed to get me anything,” I said sternly.

“Why?”

“Why should you?” I shot back, an eyebrow arched. “I mean, you’re not obliged to. It’s not like you’re my boyfriend or anything.”

I clapped my hand over my mouth as I instantly regretted what I’d said. A cloudy expression swept over Austin’s face and for a moment we were silent, sitting in the awkwardness I had created.

“You’re right, I’m not your boyfriend,” said Austin quietly. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t do something nice for you. You deserve to be treated, Megan.” The look in his eye told me that he meant every word that he said., but I couldn’t ignore the question hanging in the air.

“That’s really sweet,” I said honestly. I chewed on my bottom lip as I tried to figure out how to phrase the next bit.

“What are we, Austin?” I looked up at him through my eyelashes, expecting him to get angry at the question, but instead his face looked thoughtful as he searched my face. He reached forward and played with one of my loose strands of hair.

“I like you a lot, Megan,” said Austin in a low velvety voice, “more than anyone.”

My heart soared at the sound of his words, it was the first time he’d actually admitted to having feelings for me besides hate. I couldn’t help but wonder if there was a ‘but’ on the horizon though.

“So what’s the problem?” I asked. Even though I wasn’t in a rush to commit, I wasn’t sure why we hadn’t yet had the conversation about us and the future of this entanglement.

“There isn’t a problem,” he shot back, his eyes distracted.

“I’m not trying to push you into anything, I just want to know what you want,” I said gently as I searched his eyes. Austin’s hand dropped from my hair to my bare leg, where he glided his hand up to my thigh, which was concealed by my dress.

“All I know is that I want you, Megan,” he said, his voice taking on a serious tone. “I’ve never done this relationship thing so I don’t want to rush it or do it wrong. But all I know for sure is that I want you.” Warmth flooded my body as we gazed into each other’s eyes, his hand rubbing my thigh soothingly.

“I want you too,” I said breathlessly, already feeling the heat and wetness growing between my legs. “There’s kids over there,” I whispered before kissing Austin again.

“I don’t care.” I could feel him smiling as we continued kissing each other passionately.