Jax by E. M. Moore

14

The Ring looks so different with the lights on. It loses all of its mystique and grittiness and is replaced by a well-oiled machine that Leenie knows inside and out. She explains to me that learning the Ring’s operations took a lot of work but now she can help take a load off of Jax and Finn. They can concentrate on the fighters—and the fights—and she can run the rest. For such an unassuming person, she has no problems giving orders to the myriad of workers at her disposal.

About an hour until showtime, the guys arrive. We’re inside their office, Leenie’s taking a phone call while I try like hell not to look around for ways to get in the filing cabinets, or for any clues as to the kinds of information they store in here, when the doorknob jingles. Finn enters and kisses Leenie on the forehead. She smiles up at him and loses a beat on the phone only to cut the conversation short a few moments later. “We all set for tonight?” Finn asks.

“Of course.” She spins around in the fancy office chair to face him. “Where’s Jax?”

“Pouting,” Finn answers, avoiding my stare.

Leenie peeks at me then back to her boyfriend. “He’s moody again.”

“You have no idea.” Finn sets a bag down on the floor and starts to rummage through it. “Clive never showed up at the gym, and we have that strict ‘no show’ rule.” He stands, guzzling some water. After he replaces the cap, he says, “He’s on the card for tonight.”

“Shit,” Leenie grumbles. “What the hell?”

“No idea. I tried calling him. Straight to voicemail.”

“So, he’s out.” Leenie shrugs like it’s that easy. “Who else do we have?”

Finn plops down in a chair in the corner, running his hand through his short dark blond hair. “That’s the thing. No one’s ready in that weight class.”

Leenie’s face pinches. “Fuck.”

“Yeah…” Finn peers between the two of us. “So, you’re not going to like this. Jax is doing it.”

“What?” I shriek along with Leenie.

Finn smiles, and since I can read him, I know he’s pleased he’s caught us off guard. “Totally talked him into it. He didn’t want to but we can’t pull the fight from the card. Everyone else we have isn’t ready.”

Leenie blinks. “Jax is going to fight.”

She’s still trying to wrap her head around it but I’ve already moved past it and am thinking about the consequences. “If he—”

“Loses?” Finn asks, knowing where I’m going with this. “Yeah, right.”

“But if he does?”

“It’ll look bad, but Clive’s out and we need a body. The guy he’s fighting is being looked at by a higher circuit so we can’t send in someone who’s not ready. That’s not good for us or him.”

Leenie stands from the chair. “Well, is Jax okay? Does he need anything?”

“He’s sitting in the corner of the locker room quietly. Well, more like brooding in the corner of the locker room. Basically, he’s sitting and brooding.” Finn grins at his girlfriend. “Come on. It’s not like he hasn’t fought before. He’ll be fine.”

My stomach twists. I’ve seen Jax fight. Many times. Some on the streets and some in the underground clubs the Heights used to have. Kind of like what Psycho has going on now. Every time he was on the card, it felt as if I would die. A mix of apprehension and excitement bottlenecked inside. It was the adrenaline that my body didn’t know what to do with.

“He’s older now...” I offer as worry creeps over me.

“He’s still got it in him,” Finn says assuredly.

I rub my temples, and Finn flicks his gaze to me. He leans over, whispering in Leenie’s ear. She nods and then smiles at me. “If you want to head out there, we’re good in here. I’ll be right out. There’s a set of seats in the front row that are reserved for us if you want them.”

I nod, standing on shaky legs before moving in a daze out of the office that opens up into the locker room. Finn quickly gets up and shouts, “Lady coming through. Tuck it away or flaunt it. It’s up to you.”

I roll my eyes and slip through the open doorway, keeping my gaze straight ahead. I don’t want to accidentally look at Jax right now. Instead, on my way out the door, I’m met with a bare chest that slides into view. I look up a few inches to find one of the guys who was in the gym earlier. “I’m Foster. Nice to meet you.”

He holds out his hand, and I shake it.

“You a friend of Leenie’s?”

“Not really.”

“Don’t touch her,” Jax’s gruff voice calls out from the back. “She’ll more than likely give you gonorrhea.”

The locker room quiets while my face flames. I pull my hand from Foster’s and find Jax’s cruel gaze in the corner. I lift my hand to flip him off and sidestep Foster to get the hell out of there. He keeps throwing the fact that people have used me in my face, and I’m at my wit’s end. I get it. He’s pissed. His little man ego took a big hit, and I did it to him, but I swear I’m not going to sit back and take anymore sexual innuendos.

I walk past the two empty chairs in the front and head toward a bar manned by one of the guys Leenie gave instructions to earlier. I con a beer off him, using the fact that I’m friends with the owners, which is most definitely a lie but I need something to calm my nerves.

Watching Jax fight was both heartbreaking and exhilarating. I loved it when he won. But to watch him get hurt frayed my nerves like nothing else.

“Sade.”

I pause with the beer halfway to my mouth. I turn to find Tiron, and I gulp down a swallow of the beer before looking around to see if there are any other Psycho lackeys here.

“It’s just me.”

My heart picks up inside my chest. “I’m still working,” I tell him, getting straight to the point.

He holds his hands up. “I know. Psycho thought you might be able to use me in some way.” He leans close like we’re confidants and he hasn’t eaten me out on Psycho’s command. The sick fuck. “Plus, he wanted me to check on you.”

Icy dread drops like a rock to the pit of my stomach. His words are a reminder of what a dangerous game I’m playing, and suddenly, I feel so stupid walking around in Leenie’s clothes and dusting countertops. I’m not that girl. I’m Psycho’s well-trained con girl. “Well, you can give him a favorable report. I’m doing the job. I’m here, aren’t I?”

“Find anything yet?”

My automatic instinct is to give Tiron a rundown regarding Leenie’s Elite Boxing office keys and the filing cabinet in the office here inside the Ring. I could give him a layout of the two buildings, pinpointing both places. Hell, I could tell him it would be so easy for me to swipe the keys from Leenie since she’s trying to be my friend. If I wanted to, I could end this stupid job right now. Jax is making it obvious he wants nothing to do with me anyway.

Still, I hold back. The thought of spilling everything to this asshole makes me physically ill. “Didn’t I just say I’m still working?” I snap.

He brushes off my harsh words. “Well, I might as well stay anyway.” He takes my beer from me and drinks it in one swig. He hands it back with a wink before disappearing into the crowd.

I stay frozen where I am. My feet rooting in place as fear grabs hold. If Tiron is here, it means all eyes are on me. No matter what he’ll cop to, he’s not the only one present. They’ll be more from Psycho’s crew around, watching to make sure everything is going as planned and that I’m not fucking things up.

When the lights dim, I make my way to the seats to find Leenie already there. When she sees me walking toward her, she relaxes a little, and I still don’t get why she’s going out of her way to be nice to me after what I did to Jax.

With only a half a beer in me, I’m on edge as the matches progress. Leenie and I seem to be fairing the same as Finn takes point as corner man in all of the fights. In a different time, I’d be back in the locker room with Jax to see where his head is at but I can’t imagine my presence would be welcome right now.

I rub the back of my neck. Leenie starts to get really fidgety which can only mean one thing. Jax is up next. The announcer for the night confirms it as he calls out Jax’s name. The audience goes crazy, but I block them out.

Almost as surreal as watching him approach the Ring is the song he comes out to. Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry blares from the speakers, and I can’t help but think it’s another slight against me. I get it. He thinks I’m insane. He thinks I’m easy. He doesn’t take his eyes off me as the cut guy spreads petroleum jelly on his brows and forehead, then checks his nails and for the presence of a cup to save his junk from any accidental groin kicks. As soon as they finish, he walks up the metal steps, eyes still blazing right through me as the lead singer screams about fucking a girl who’s nothing short of a groupie.

To watch him up there is to be transported back a few years. There are so many assaults on my brain that I don’t know which one to pay attention to first. Luckily, Jax’s music ends, and the other guy’s begins. His opponent looks fierce as well as he marches toward the octagon. What Finn was saying earlier makes sense. If this other gym is trying to get their guy to move up professionally, they would need to put him up against a worthy opponent. A loss against someone skilled is better than winning against a weak fighter.

The match begins, and I immediately reach over and grab Leenie’s hand. She sinks her fingers right into mine, each of us hanging on to the other for support. Every time Jax gets hit, I feel it inside me. It’s like a blow to the already battered place where I keep the knowledge of what I did to him close by as a reminder of who I truly am.

Altogether, the fight is an all-out brawl. Finn was right. Jax still has it. Each fighter takes their knocks, and by the third round, they’re both swollen and bloody. For not fighting in a long time, Jax looks amazing. If he’d trained for this fight at all, he’d have ended it by now. I’m sure of it.

Leenie lets out a breath that I feel in my soul as the round clock ticks down. The energy in the Ring is tangible. They’re used to seeing Jax in the trainer’s corner, so for the crowd to see him step into the spotlight is a treat they’re happy to applaud. More and more people yell his name as the fight swings in one guy’s favor and then the other.

A hand touches my shoulder. I’m so enraptured by the fight I just shrug it off, sure it’s only one of the rowdy audience members behind me. When it happens again, I glance up at a smirking Tiron. I shrug him off again and stare back at the fight to find Jax’s dark eyes piercing into me. He focuses back on his opponent, letting his fists fly until the other fighter is knocked out cold, sprawled out on the mat.

The whole area takes in a collective breath that lasts about point five seconds until it erupts just as the referee kneels next to the other fighter.

Finn storms the cage as Jax glares at me, shoulders heaving. His dark gaze makes me shiver. Finn slaps his brother’s chest with a huge smile on his face. I take in his excitement, but I don’t feel any of it. Not with Jax glaring at me like that. Finn slaps his brother’s chest again and that’s when Jax finally shakes out of his predator persona.

Cold lips find my ear. “Well, that’s interesting, isn’t it?”

Tiron leaves a skitter of nerves up and down my spine. When I finally look for him, he’s not there anymore but I have no doubt he’s around here somewhere, waiting to come out of the woodwork like a cockroach.

Leenie turns toward me, her mouth agape. “Holy shit. I knew they were both good but Jax—” She lets out a surprised squeal. “Why the hell does he not fight?”

I run my hands through my hair and grip the back of my neck, my tresses threading through my fingers as I watch Jax get his hand raised in the center of the octagon. “I don’t know. It’s not as if he needs to.”

Leenie peers at me, her brows drawn. “Yeah but—”

When she sees the look on my face, it’s as if she knows. She’s a people reader. She probably gets more about what’s going on between Jax and me than I do.

Jax could’ve been inside the ring rather than outside of it but he held back...for me. The fighter wasn’t the person he wanted to be for me. When I was out of the picture, I thought he’d go back to it so it’s surprising that this is his first fight after all this time.

The last fight of the night isn’t nearly as electric as the one before it but I’m super biased so I’m probably not the best independent reviewer. When the fighting arena turns into the club, Leenie and I make our way to the corner door where the fighters come out. They trickle into the area but none of them are the ones I want to see. The guy from the locker room, Foster, is out here trying to chat me up but I ignore him until Tiron catches my eye. He nods his head to tell me I should follow. I don’t want to but there isn’t anything I can do. If I refuse, he’ll stay and find another way.

With a deep breath, I tell Leenie I need to use the bathroom and go off in search of Psycho’s lackey. I find him on the edge of the dance floor where there are already people moving to the heavy beat of the music. I move in front of him, and he grins. He holds his hand out like he wants to dance, and I roll my eyes. “Just tell me what you’re reporting back to Psycho.”

Tiron takes my hand anyway, dragging me to the center of the floor. “This will look less conspicuous.”

“I’m sure Jax will love it,” I deadpan. “Isn’t the goal to get into his bed so he can trust me? Not sure this will help.”

Tiron chuckles. “I saw the way he looked at me just before he practically knocked that guy’s head off.” He shifts closer, dropping his lips to my ear again. “You’re already fucking him, aren’t you, Sade?”

“It’s complicated,” I divulge, putting space between us. We are fucking but it’s not in a way that either of us likes. Jax can pretend all he wants that he’s punishing me but what he’s really doing is punishing himself. He’s making himself into a guy he doesn’t want to be.

Tiron’s hands find my ass and move me forward as we sway to the music. I place my hands on his shoulders for show but anyone really looking would see that I’m not into it. He leans over. “Psycho wants me to remind you that he has eyes everywhere.”

“I know,” I all but growl.

“He wants me to do something so you remember him.” Tiron grinds his cock against my front. With the loud music, I can barely hear him but in another way, he’s so loud. What he’s insinuating is obvious. “We both know he hasn’t done it for you for a while. He’s holding onto something that’s already slipped through his fingers.” Tiron either has a death wish, or Psycho really did put him up to this. “In fact...” He pauses as he moves one hand to the front of my hip, the pad of his finger sneaking toward the apex of my thighs. “I have a sneaking suspicion I’m the one who made you come the other day. He suspects it too, you know.” He flicks his finger across the seam of my pants. “I can do it again.”

I push him off me, and he stumbles backward into a dancing couple. “Fuck off, Tiron.”

A shocked expression flits over his face like he can’t believe I’ve dismissed him but then he looks past my shoulder and grins. He stalks toward me, sharp cheekbones prominent. He spins me in his arms until he’s grinding against my ass. I feel how hard he is but that’s not what has my attention. A few feet from me, Jax dances with another girl. He holds her hand over his chest as they move together seductively.

“I guess Psycho was right,” Tiron says. “You do need some help in getting his attention.”

“I’m fine,” I growl back.

“So, you’re just going to let him get nice and cozy with another girl?”

Jax flicks his gaze toward me. I don’t know what he sees but his gaze hardens and he lowers his lips to the beautiful girl in his arms and kisses her like a man starved.

My heart shatters as I watch the only man I’ve ever cared for hold someone else the way he used to hold me, complete with her hand on his chest.

I push Tiron away, and he grabs me back.

“Hey,” a deep voice cuts in. I recognize it as Finn’s, and Tiron lets me go in a heartbeat, pulling his hands up like he wasn’t doing anything at all.

Finn peers between the two of us and then at his brother who’s looking over at the commotion. At least Finn’s outburst has made them stop kissing.

“You okay?” Finn asks.

Tiron’s already making his way through the crowd, no doubt happy he believes he’s somehow accomplished what he’s come here to do.

“Just peachy,” I say, my voice thick with emotion.

I go to walk toward Jax but Finn holds me back. “Don’t hurt him. I mean it.”

I grind my teeth together as I squirm free. Who’s warning him not to hurt me?

No one. That’s who.