Healed by Evan Grace
Chapter Twenty
Heidi
Colton texted me earlier to tell me that I didn’t need to pick him up from the airport because his dad was going to do it. Now, I wait for him to get home, trying to ignore the hurt I feel that he didn’t want me to pick him up.
I decide I’ll make a nice dinner. The salmon and wild rice are in the oven, staying warm.
Tomorrow is my appointment with the OB, and hopefully they’ll confirm the pregnancy, and then I can tell Colton. I rub a hand over my stomach and smile. I’m trying to be positive, even though I’m scared to death.
I sit on the sofa and lean against the back and cover my mouth as I yawn. In the books I’ve read, the exhaustion should ease up as I head into the second trimester.
I’m not sure I felt this tired the first time I was pregnant.
Beep, beep, beep. What is that? Am I dreaming? My eyes fly open. There is smoke coming from the kitchen, and the smoke detector is going off. I jump and turn the oven off.
I grab the potholders and pull the burning food out of the oven. Dammit, I fell asleep and damn near burned the house down. I open the patio door and the kitchen windows to air it out.
It takes almost an hour to get the smell of burnt salmon out of the house. The smell has sent me running to the bathroom to vomit twice. I wrap a shirt around my head to cover my mouth.
I close everything up and go through the house one more time with the air freshener. It is when I pull the shirt off that I realize that Colton isn’t home, and his flight was supposed to have landed an hour and a half ago. He should be here by now.
I grab my phone and call him. The call goes to voicemail. I call Colton’s mom, and hers goes to voicemail as well. My stomach pitches, and I stand up. I put my shoes on and head out to my car.
His parents live close to us, so in no time I’m pulling into their driveway. I climb out of my car and run to the front door, banging on the wood, and repeatedly ringing the doorbell until finally the porch light comes on.
Cari opens the door, her eyes red and swollen. “Come in, sweetheart.”
I follow her inside and into their family room. Colton is sitting on the sofa with his dad. He looks up at me, and the pain in his eyes causes me to freeze. I move toward him, but he holds up his hand.
“What’s happening?” I ask, the worry evident in my voice. No one says anything; they just sit there in silence. Thanks to my hormones, I begin to cry. “Please, will someone tell me what is happening?”
Colton gets up and approaches me. “There’s a chance that my cancer is back.”
I reach out to hug him, but he backs away from me. “Okay … what happened?”
“My lab tests came back abnormal. My white blood cell count is really high, and my red blood cell count is low. The other day I noticed this.” He lifts his shirt, and I see a purplish bruise. “This is what happened before.”
“You’re not alone in this.” I reach up to grab his face, but again he moves away from me. “Stop it; we’re in this together. I told you that I will always fight alongside you.”
“Go home, Heidi. I’ll be home in the morning.”
“Why are you doing this? You promised we’d fight together. Are you telling me you’re breaking that promise already?” I’m proud for the strength in my voice, but this feels like déjà vu.
I feel like at any moment he’s going to tell me he doesn’t love me anymore and break my heart all over again. I’m not sticking around for that.
“Please come home,” I say before turning around and heading for the door. I rush out of the house and to my car. As soon as I climb in, I see Colton walking around the front end and climbing in the passenger seat.
Neither of us speaks as I drive us home. I don’t know what to say, or what to do, and he won’t let me touch him at all. Maybe if I tell him about the baby, he’ll know he has something to fight for.
We get home and we climb out of the car, walking into the house. Colton locks up while I head into the bedroom. I get ready for bed because I’m not really sure what else to do right now.
While I’m brushing my teeth, he comes into the bathroom. He watches me in the mirror as I finish, and then he walks toward me. My heart races as he stops right behind me. His arm slides around my waist, and he cups my breast.
They’re super sensitive right now, and I moan the moment his thumb rubs my nipple. His hand slides down my body to the hem of my nightgown. With both hands he lifts the pink silk fabric up to my hips. He grabs my panties, ripping them from my body.
Colton spins me around and lifts me onto the counter. He spreads my legs and steps between them. I reach between us and quickly undo the button of his shorts and pull his cock out.
He grabs it and quickly lines it up with the entrance of my pussy. He thrusts inside me so deep I cry out. Colton grips my thighs, spreading my legs even wider. My moan echoes off the walls, and my head hits the mirror.
I watch as he pulls almost all the way out and then thrusts roughly inside. There’s a bite of pain each time, but I don’t care. He holds my gaze as he reaches between us, rubbing my clit.
It takes no time at all before I’m coming. I grab onto him as he picks up the pace, thrusting harder and harder until he plants himself to the root. I feel it as he comes inside me.
He buries his face in my neck, groaning against my skin. I hug him tight, taking a moment to show him my love. Colton hugs me to him so tight I can hardly breathe, but I don’t dare move. He needs me, and I told him I’d always be there, and I will be.
I’m not sure how long we stay wrapped around each other, but when we finally move he pulls out of me and quickly tucks himself back in his shorts. Colton picks me up and carries me into the bedroom laying me on my spot. He strips down to his boxer briefs and climbs into bed, wrapping his arm around my waist.
It’s a long time before either of us finds sleep, but we don’t say anything, just lay in the quiet.
***
I lied to Colton about where I was going—I have my first OB appointment today, and I’m scared as hell. All I want is good news, good news that I can give Colton.
The moment I step into the office butterflies take flight in my belly. After checking in, I take a seat and my knee immediately begins to bounce. The nurse calls my name, and I stand up.
After getting weighed and having my vitals checked, I go pee in a cup and then head to the exam room. She has me take my bottoms off because I have weird periods, so I’m unsure about when my last one was.
Dr. Honn opens the door. “Hi, Heidi.” She holds her hand out, and I take it, giving it a shake.
“My sister, Sierra Collins, speaks very highly of you.”
“Oh, I love your sister. How is that sweet baby girl doing?” She sits on the stool next to me.
“Ember is amazing. She is beautiful like her momma.”
She turns to the computer and taps on the keyboard. “That’s great. Well, as for you, you’re definitely pregnant. You told the nurse you’ve had spotting every month?” I nod. “Okay, we’re going to do an ultrasound so we can get an accurate age on the baby.”
The doctor has me put my feet in the stirrups, and the nurse pulls a machine over. “Okay, Heidi. I want you to lay back for me.” I do what she says. “You’re going to feel a little bit of pressure.”
She squirts jelly on the end of long white wand with a condom over it. I wince as she sticks it inside of me. I can feel her moving it around and I’m starting to get nervous.
Dr. Honn presses a button, and a fast-whooshing sound fills the room. I begin to cry because that is the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. “The heartbeat sounds great. Let me just take some measurements, and we’ll see how far along you are.”
She tells the nurse to turn the screen toward me. “Here’s your baby.” That is when I see a little black circle with a little white blob with something moving fast in the middle of it. “That’s the heart.” The nurse points to that spot.
“Well, Heidi, from the measurements, I’d say you’re nine weeks and two days. That puts your due date at January eighth. I’ll print off a picture for you.” She hands me a folder filled with important pregnancy information, and she gives me my prescription for the prenatal vitamins. “This has basic do’s and don’ts. When it’s time—the classes you’ll want to take, and how to pre-register at the hospital for when it’s go time.”
I practically float to my car. As I start the engine, I look in the rearview mirror before putting the car in reverse, and suddenly I feel sick as reality hits me like a bucket of cold water. Colton’s cancer may have come back. I could lose him, and our baby could grow up not knowing his or her daddy.
I open the door and stick my head out, puking on the cement. I grab a napkin out of the glovebox and quickly wipe my mouth off. I continue the drive home and my stomach sinks when I pull in the driveway, open the garage door, and find Colton’s SUV gone.
He was quiet this morning, which I can understand, but I’m scared he’s gearing up to push me away again. The doctor in Nashville got Colton an appointment with a top-rated oncologist in Atlanta. He’s young but aggressive. Colton will see the oncologist on Monday. I need to adjust my schedule because I’m going with him whether he wants me to or not.
I let myself inside and sit on the sofa. As soon as Colton gets home, I’m going to finally tell him that we’re having a baby. I can only hope it fills him with even more of a reason to fight.