It’s Only Temporary by Iona Rose

Bianca

“Let’s have one last awesome night together,” Connor had whispered to me before making love to me for the third time.

Outside, the snow had been falling consistently through the night, a perfect backdrop to one of the greatest nights I’d ever spent with a man. I was up early, Connor’s words ringing in my ears. Last night together.

A part of me had hoped that maybe he would want to continue with our fling when we went back home. I turned to Connor and watched him sleeping in the light of dawn. His lips were curved in a slight smile, and I wondered what he was dreaming about.

I was relieved that Connor was finished with Angie. I only wished that we had more time to enjoy each other now that the shadow of his fiancée was not hanging over us.

I couldn’t make myself go back to sleep even though my body was weary. I left bed at eight, padded to the bathroom and refreshed myself. It had snowed all night and the mountains were beckoning. My last day of skiing. I dressed warmly, layering myself with a v-neck heavy jumper and a winter coat.

I stared at Connor longingly one last time before quietly leaving the room. Outside, though the snow had stopped, the wind was biting cold and I was glad that I’d dressed extra warmly. Despite the cold, it was a beautiful morning as I trudged through the snow.

I wasn’t the only one with the same idea and I exchanged greetings and waves with three other people headed to the lifts. All morning, I’d been trying not to think about the one thing that had been plaguing my mind. Would I be able to fit back into my life and routine when I returned home?

Connor had stolen my heart in a very short time. Just the thought of parting ways with him was enough to cause palpitations in my heart. What if we continued with our affair until we got each other out of our systems?

That would be the perfect solution. There was only one problem with that. Connor was not the kind of man who had affairs for the sake of it. I was probably the one exception.

The other even bigger problem was that Connor had not stated his intentions so far. He hadn’t once spoken about our future. If anything he had hinted at it, with statements like, ‘last night together’.

At the last minute and in a moment of carelessness, I decided to go for the hardest trail. I needed the solitude to think through my problems and I was sure there would be no other skiers there.

I slid onto the lift and pulled down the safety bar, all along wishing that Connor had come with me. He made everything an adventure. The lift rose up and glided along the line while down below, everything looked as if it had been sprinkled with white gold.

My heart pounded hard in my chest as I got off the lift and propelled myself forward. As I’d thought, there were no skiers on the slopes. It was eerily quiet, as if I was suddenly alone in the world.

The slope started gently enough but it gradually got steeper and the obstacles were coming at me at speeds which left me breathless. Panic filled my chest as I realized that I’d made a mistake in choosing this trail.

A thousand thoughts zipped through my mind, the most consistent of them being that I was going to die on the slopes. I forced myself to calm down. I had done this for years as a kid. I wasn’t a novice. All I needed to do was keep myself upright and make my way to the bottom.

I swerved dangerously to the left to avoid a cluster of trees and just when I was about to let out a breath of relief that I’d managed to avoid them and keep my balance, my skis hit something.

Seconds later, I was flying in the air before I hit the ground. Hard. I momentarily lost my bearings as I rolled through the snow like a ball. Even before I came to a stop, I knew that I’d hurt my left leg. Searing pain ran up and down the length of it.

I finally came to a stop as tears filled my eyes. I tried to raise my head but I couldn’t. The pain in my leg seemed to have spread everywhere in my body. Then everything went black and I gratefully allowed myself to float into a state of nothingness.

The next thing I knew, voices were pulling me back to the land of the living. The pain came at me again, burning my leg. Soft cries rent the air before I realized that I was the source.

“Bianca, can you here me?”

I snapped my eyes open at the sound of Connor’s voice. What was he doing on the slopes? I’d left him asleep in our room. I didn’t have time to think as other voices shouted near me.

“Ma’am, can you hear me?”

A worried face came into my line of vision. I wanted to tell the nice man that I was all right and I’d just fallen. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

“Just nod,” he said.

“Her name is Bianca,” Connor said.

I wanted to weep from the joy of hearing his voice.

“Bianca,” the nice man said. “You’re not to worry. We’ll take good care of you and take you to a hospital.”

A hospital? I struggled to sit up, ignoring the throbbing pain in my leg. I blinked at the sudden sunlight. “I’m okay. I just had a fall, no big deal.” That took so much effort, that I let my head fall back down.

“Bianca,” Connor said. “They think you broke your ankle. It wasn’t just a simple fall. You’re lucky you didn’t get a concussion.”

His words made my blood turn to ice. A broken leg? Oh God. Panic seized my chest. I’d never broken any limb ever, since I was born. But I was going back home today and I needed to get back to work.

“She’s getting agitated,” a voice said from a distance. “We’ll give her a pain killer in a shot to make her calm down. Then we can safely carry her down.”

I wanted to protest but I was too frightened to protest. I felt a prick on my arm and then moments later, I drifted off to sleep.

The next time I came to, I was in a hospital bed. I took in my surroundings but they gave me no clue as to where I was. My gaze was drawn to my left leg encased in a cast. It was true then. I hadn’t dreamed up the whole thing.

Just as fresh tears of frustration filled my eyes, the door opened and Connor entered carrying a mug of coffee.

“You’re awake,” he said, relief in his face. “The doctor said you’d wake up right about now. He placed his coffee on the table and came to the side of the bed. He took my hand and sandwiched it in his.

“Hey,” he said softly.

My lips felt dry and I licked them before attempting to speak. “Hi. Where am I? Looks like a hospital.”

He nodded, clearly relieved. “You are. We’re in the Rocky Center hospital. The paramedics brought you here after the accident on the slopes. Do you remember that?”

I’d done some first aid and I was aware that the main worry was a concussion.

“I do and I’m sorry,” I said. “I was an idiot to do that slope alone.”

“It doesn’t matter now, all that matters is that you’ll be okay. The only serious injury you have is your ankle. Luckily for you the skis and poles didn’t hurt you when you fell,” Connor said, his voice cracking a little.

It struck me then how much stress I had put him through. My eyes widened as I remembered everyone else. I was about to ask Connor when the door opened and a nurse entered.

She asked Connor to excuse us and proceeded to take my temperature as well as other vitals while making cheerful conversation. “You’re going to be ok,” she said smiling.

“Can I go home?” I asked. I needed to go back to the lodge, get my phone and call Eva. She would be worried sick if I wasn’t home in the evening. Not that I even knew what time it was.

She laughed. “The doctor will let you know. There’s some water on the table next to your bed. Have a few sips.” She glided out of the room.

Frustration welled up inside me. I pushed myself to sit up. The door opened and to my relief Connor strolled in closely followed by his parents, Aunt Catherine, Sarah and Brian.

My jaw dropped. “What are you doing here?” I asked Sarah and Brian. “Shouldn’t you be on your way to your honeymoon?”

“We will be as soon as we’re sure you’ll be okay,” Sarah said briskly.

I could have punched myself. I couldn’t believe that I had caused everyone to change their plans. I needed them to understand that I was okay now. I wished I could go back in time. I’d been an utter fool to think I could ski down the most difficult trail of all.

I wanted to cover myself with a blanket from embarrassment as Connor’s family fussed over me.

They stayed for half an hour, during which time the doctor joined us and declared me all right and ready for discharge the following day. I grumbled a little about that but Judy glared me into silence. I was glad when Sarah and Brian left for their honeymoon.

“Mom says you can continue staying at the lodge until your leg is better,” Connor said.

I stared at him in horror then looked down at my leg. “No, I couldn’t.” I sounded so ungrateful and yet the offer had been so generous.

That was the problem. They already knew that I wasn’t Connor’s real fiancée and yet they had been gracious enough to let me stay on. I was embarrassed enough by everything and I just wanted to go home and lick my wounds in private.

“I appreciate the offer and it’s very kind of your mom but I really do need to get back to work.” I felt a renewed gratitude for the work I did.

I would be limited in leaving the house but most of my supplies arrived by mail. I could go back to work thank God even with a leg encased in a cast.

“I expected that. We can fly back home tomorrow evening. I got someone to call the airline. I also called Eva and told her what had happened. As you can imagine, she threw a fit but she calmed down when she understood you were fine.”

For some reason, that sent me into a fit of giggles. Connor looked puzzled at first but his face soon relaxed and he chuckled. I could just imagine how much Eva had torn into him.

“Did she tell you ‘I told you so’?” I said.

“Only a hundred times,” Connor said and then stopped smiling. “Seriously though, I blame myself. I should have gone with you to the slopes.”

I stared at him. “How would you have done that when you were asleep? Don’t even blame yourself for something that was squarely my fault. I don’t know what made me think I could ski that slope.” I remembered the speed at which the obstacles had come at me and shuddered.

Connor took my hand. “I was thinking. My apartment is big and seeing as you need help, why don’t you come and stay with me.”

“What? No! I can’t stay with you. I have a home and it’s large enough for me. Besides, Eva comes in everyday and she can help with whatever I’ll need.”