Catherinelle by Diane Portman-Ray

 

24

 

I had to wait for Hugo to finish his talk with Gino in the elevator, but finally, he followed, doing everything in his power not to look at me. I didn’t know if I really pissed him off with the fake argument or if he was acting like that because Gino was so close.

He didn’t say a word until we were behind my bedroom door.

“What is this about, Catherinelle?”

“Whoa, are you really mad at me?”

“You’re pushing it with all the touching and sitting next to me. I thought we talked about games, but you keep acting like a damn child!”

He snapped, raising his voice at the end of the sentence, and I stepped back, disarmed by his attitude. This was supposed to be a beautiful moment, a stolen minute to enjoy on our first Christmas together, and he was ruining it with his behavior.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Hugo? I’m trying to do something nice here.”

“But things can’t always be how you want them, Catherinelle. Damn it!” He was frustrated, pacing around with one hand on the back of his head, trying to shake of the tension. He did that whenever he was cross with me and was trying to control his reaction. Safe to say, he needed a new method. “It’s bad enough that I have to walk with a hard on every fucking day. That I…my mind is filled with your image, your smell, your moans. I just had to eat at the same table with your mother trying to block out all the ways I wanted to eat you instead. Didn’t you hear Gino giving that damn speech, talking about how I’m loyal to him? I’m miserable enough, Cat, without you toying with me.”

Wow, I did not see that coming. This was the longest chain of words I’d ever heard coming from Hugo since…ever. He must have been boiling inside if he felt the need to rant, but I wasn’t about to be the punching bag for something we were both into.

“Help me understand, Mustafa. You’re mad at me because you’re horny, and you want me.” He just ground some noises through his teeth. “And I make you miserable by trying to get close to you.”

This got his attention. He turned to me, exhaled, and his shoulders slumped.

“No, baby girl, that’s not…” Looked like the Monster finally calmed the fuck down. His foul mood was getting really exhausting. I wanted my sweet Hugo, the one that came out when it was just us. “If we make a mistake, and Gino finds out about us, it won’t be pretty. We talked about this.”

“Hugo, you’re blowing this thing out of proportion.”

“Cat, you’ll be fine. You’re his sister; you’re seventeen; you’re…you’re a princess. This is my fault for being born in filth. A bastard has no place next to royalty. I shouldn’t be here, baby girl. I know it, and Gino knows it too. I made a vow to him, and I’m disgusted with myself for breaking it.”

My eyes narrowed at him. I wanted him to make a vow to me…someday. A vow to cherish in sickness and in health, but we’d never get there if he kept choosing my brother over me. It was painful to see him ripped in half like this, but I was hurt too. My man seemed more in love with my brother, God damn it!

“No one cares where you came from, Hugo. Will Gino have an opinion about the age difference? Maybe. Probably. He will be pissed because he’s my big brother, and he wants to protect me, but this has nothing to do with Gino. This is about us. I don’t need protection from you, baby. He’ll understand, eventually. When we tell him…”

“Pardon?”

He cut me off, and I looked at him, confused.

“When we tell Gino about us.”

“That will never happen.”

I felt like someone threw a bucket of cold water in my face and then slapped me. Out of instinct, I put my hands in front of me defensively. Were we really having this conversation?

“What the hell are you saying?”

“This,” he wiggled his finger between us, “will be the secret we’ll take with us to the afterlife, Catherinelle. Gino can’t ever find out.”

My mouth opened, then closed again. How was I supposed to respond to that load of crap?

My instincts overpowered my brain, and I took the three steps separating us and slammed my fist into his stomach. His abdomen was rock hard, and it probably hurt me more than it hurt him. The bones in my hand cracked at the contact, but I didn’t stop. I hit him again, this time with my other hand.

“Catherinelle, stop. You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“Shut up. How can you talk to me like that?”

“Like what?”

Ugh, this infuriating man. I’d put up with his temper and stubbornness every fucking time, but I needed a damn break.

“Gino can never find out?” I spit his words back at him, loaded with disgust.

“What the fuck is wrong with that? We both know that’s not an option.”

“Jackass. Do I mean anything to you?”

He turned gray, his features sobering.

“You’re the only thing that ever meant something to me. I don’t know how to tell you how I feel, Cat. You make my head spin; every time you walk into a room, I hear a fucking song and then realize it’s my heart beating faster. I want to fuck you constantly. I want to hear you laugh. I want to have you, baby girl. You are everything to me.”

I tried to keep my poker face intact and not show him how affected I was, but it was hard. His words dug under my skin, making their way to my soul like arrows. He wanted me? I was his in every way that was humanly possible.

“Good, because I love you.” I paused to take in a deep breath. “And you love me too. That is love, Hugo.”

“Maybe I do.” He wasn’t sure because no one had ever showed him love.

All I wanted now was to go back to meet that little boy that dad brought home in raggedy clothes with dirt on his face and hug him tight; tell him how loved he was.

“Love is worth fighting for, you moron! Hugo, I can’t imagine my life without you, but it seems you have a pretty solid plan for yourself. Tell me, Mustafa, how will it be? You wait until it’s too exhausting for us to hide and then leave me for a threesome?”

“Jealousy is overrated, baby girl. You can stop with the threesomes. I will never leave you, Cat. All my life I waited to die. My only purpose is to cover for your brother if he gets into shit. If someone came for his head, they’d end up with mine instead.”

“Stop talking like that. That is insane.”

“It’s true, and I’m fine with it. The son of a bitch is not only my boss; he is my brother. But you, baby girl? You’re the first person that ever made me want to live. If it was up to me, I would never let you go. I’d meet my end holding your hand, Cat.”

Oh, God. I was melting like butter in the sun. For a man who claimed to have a block of ice where his heart should be, Hugo could even make death sound romantic.

“It is up to you, baby.” I placed a gentle hand on his arm, desperate to feel him. “It’s up to us.”

“No, Catherinelle. You know that’s not an option. You’ll change your mind in a few months anyways.”

I stopped at the last second and chose not to hit him again.

“That’s not how love works, Monster.”

“Baby girl, you’re young. What’s gonna happen next year when you decide you want to travel the world or maybe go to college?”

“What does that have to do with us?”

“I’m not the man for you, Cat. You’ll see then that you deserve so much more; you’ll find someone who will not make you feel ashamed.”

“Baby. Baby!” I wasn’t able to bear it anymore, so I shut him up by crawling up his body and sealing his lips with small kisses. “I could never be ashamed of you. Where do you keep getting these bullshit ideas?”

He paused and sighed, taking my face in his hands. An understanding warmth settled in the dusky grey of his eyes.

“The Albanian scum,” he simply said. “A dog that was fed scraps. That’s how your father thought about me. That’s how they all see me. Your family…”

“My family is made of a bunch of counterfeiters, smugglers and gangsters. No one cares you weren’t born into wealth, Hugo. We weren’t either. Our fortune was made climbing up just like you did. I am a princess, yes, a mafia principessa, but it’s a crooked empire. You and Gino are cut from the same cloth; when will you see this?”

“No. Your brother has honor; he has principles. I can’t afford that if it would stand in the way of executing his orders.”

“You are a good man. We don’t live like the others; this is the underworld. I don’t care that you killed or hurt people. If you wouldn’t have done that, they would have come for us. You’re loyal; you’re protective. You put my brother above your own happiness for fuck’s sake. This is goodness, Monster. I could never be ashamed for everyone to know I’m yours, and don’t forget that I’m a Nucci too. No one would dare to talk about us.”

In our famiglia, there was respect, but there was also fear. This was the man I loved, and I would never let anyone bash him. Not that they would. Hugo Mustafa was a product of the Nucci family. My mother looked after him; my uncles watched him grow up. He had their respect, but he didn’t respect himself.

“You could do better than I, Cat.”

“Jesus Christ. Yes, I probably could because you are a complete moron sometimes.” I stomped my foot to the ground, exasperated by this conversation. “Answer me this: do you wanna be with me? I’m not talking about sex. Do you see yourself with me, or do you still think I’m a spoiled little girl who has no idea what she’s doing?”

“What?” He tensed up like a crossbow ready to shoot.

“I’m not asking you to marry me. I just want to know if I’m alone in this. I love you, and believe it or not, you love me too. And I’m seeing this entire future with you while you wait for us to end.”

Another deep sigh escaped from his throat.

“You are mine, Catherinelle. Even if I have to let you go, you’ll always be mine.” There was a solemnity in his words, and my heart finally settled.

“You don’t have to let me go. Daddy…he ruined mom’s life by being a shitty husband; he ruined our name; he almost ruined Gino when he had to take over the family and bury all that shit. I will not let him ruin us before we start. Promise me, Hugo,” I begged, “Promise me we’ll have a chance.”

“Cat, this is not fair. I can’t deny you anything.” Just what I was hoping to hear. “I promise you. Even if it’d cost me everything, I’ll fight for you.”

“Thank you.”

I got up on my tip toes for a kiss, and he met me half way. His tongue felt rough on mine while he was wiping away all the fears and frustration that had gathered between us. Instead, my core was filled with a carnal need. I was empty, and I needed my man to feel the void.

“You taste so fucking good, princess.”

Through the haze of desire, I remembered why I asked him to come here in the first place.

“I have a present for you, Monster.”

“I know. I figured out when you bought it. It made me feel like shit.”

“Why?” I asked while backing out of the bedroom into my walk-in closet, where I tucked away the box containing his gift.

“Because people don’t give me stuff, Cat, and I searched my brain for days on what I should give you.”

I came back with a small box, wrapped in black wrapping paper with a golden bow on top.

“You didn’t have to give me anything. Come on, open yours.” I pushed the little package into his hand, and he shifted his weight from one leg to another.

He was hesitant to open it, but when he looked at my face and saw my enthusiasm, he ripped straight through the paper. The black velvet box inside had the word Graff on it.

“You got me jewelry, princess?”

When he lifted the lid, his face dropped, and that made my smile spread like wild fire. Hugo took out the gold chain and looked at me. It was perfect; it was him made out of gold. The chain looked like two vines with small thorns, and a gold cross was hanging from it. The cross was simple, made out of sharp lines except for the pink topaz I’d had encrusted right in the middle.

“It reminded me of you,” I said, suddenly feeling shy under his intense gaze.

“It’s a fucking beautiful piece, Cat.”

“You always talk about your origin like it’s a sin you carry, and I can’t bare it, Hugo. I know you’re not big on church, but the chain reminded me of the crown of thorns. Do you like it?”

“More than I can tell you. Why the stone?”

“It’s a pink topaz. That’s me. That’s my heart beating in your chest.” I bit my lip to stop the flow of emotions that was coming in like a summer storm. “You know, because of the pink hair.”

He chuckled and nodded.

“Thank you, Catherinelle, I…thank you.”

“My name is on the back of the cross. I need you to wear it, Hugo. It kills me that I can’t mark you in any way and show every skank that comes and sniffs around you that you are mine.”

He put the chain around his neck in the next second.

“I’ll never take it off, but you have to promise to wear my gift too.”

I didn’t see from what pocket he pulled the ring box out, but suddenly, it was in my face. The bright Tiffany baby blue was unmistakable, and I got excited.

“You remembered I love to go to Tiffany.”

“You love to go anywhere you can spend money. Umm, it’s custom made. It’s one of their classic design, but I had the stone brought in.”

With greedy hands, I opened it and found the most beautiful ring inside. It was designed as an engagement ring, I was sure of it, but I didn’t think Hugo thought about that when he picked it out. The design was a classic Tiffany & Co; it was a simple, thin band, filled with little diamonds, and in the center, it had a huge rock, also framed by diamonds. The gemstone was black like midnight, sucking all the light around it. It was so beautiful, I felt hypnotized by it.

With a shaky hand, I placed it on my ring finger, and Hugo’s hand grabbed mine, touching it gently.

“It’s a benitoite.”

“Huh?”

“The stone. It’s a benitoite that was extracted from San Benedito. I was told it’s one of the rarest in the world. I have a guy who sends them over the border to Canada.”

“Hugo, this looks expensive.”

A crooked side smile appeared on his face.

“I can afford it, baby girl. Ask me why I chose this stone.”

“Why did you choose this stone, Monster?”

“Because it’s me. It’s my dark heart, and I wanted you to wear it on your hand every day. You already have it; this is just a symbol.”

Fuck, what pair we were. Both crazed with each other.

“We need to talk to Gino soon. I don’t want us to be connected by just rings and chains forever. And I don’t want him to hear it from someone else.” The least Gino deserved was my honesty.

He took a deep breath, nodded and looked away. This was hard for him.

“I promised you I would, princess. Just don’t take the ring off.”

My monster. Loving in his own way. He made my head spin with happiness while my body was burning for him.

I jumped into his arms, needing the closeness, and I wrapped my legs and arms around him. My weight didn’t faze him for a second.

“Merry Christmas, baby,” I whispered above his lips.

“Merry Christmas, princess. This is my best one yet.”

We clashed and burned into a kiss that made the air around us catch on fire. The desperation to have each other was thick like honey, dripping from both of us.

“Now fuck me, Monster.”

“Cat, I want nothing more than to bruise that pussy, but we can’t. Your entire family is home.”

I put my index finger on his mouth to shut him up.

“Don’t think, Hugo. Do you want me to beg you, baby?” I turned my sweet side on and ground on his dick that was already hard as a rock in his pants. “Please, Monster, don’t leave me like this. I want you so badly it hurts.”

“Fucking shit!”

Hugo walked with me to the nearest flat surface, my Victorian make up table, and he didn’t give a fuck that I had to wait six months for this peace to be sculpted out of Pink Ivory wood. He pushed everything away, making perfume bottles and lipsticks roll to the floor and dropped my ass on the table. My pussy clenched when I saw the look in his eyes. He was consumed, caught between the man and the beast. I loved it when he let go like that.

He dropped on one knee and started pulling my panties down from under my dress. When he tried to get back up, I pushed back on his shoulders.

“Not so fast, Monster. Kiss me.”

“Kiss you? You mean eat your pussy, baby girl?” I bit hard on my lower lip and nodded in agreement. “I will lick you until you can’t take it anymore, baby.”

And he did. Minute after minute after minute, he made me orgasm two times on his face. One of my legs was on his shoulder, the other barely touching the floor with the tip of my shoe, and my hands were gripping the edge of the table, hopelessly trying to not lose my head entirely.

“Hugo!”

“Ah, again, baby girl?”

“Yes. I’m so close.”

When he heard that, his tongue started moving in circles, and I was thrown over the edge of paradise again. The orgasm hit me in waves, making my body pulsate at every joint. This pleasure was too much for any human to take.

Hugo pushed himself up and glued his forehead to mine.

“Satisfied? Can I fuck you now?”

“Yes, please.”

Next, I was rolled around and landed with my front plastered to the table, and Hugo’s hand slapped my ass. Hard.

“Ass up, baby girl.”

I listened to his order and arched my back to give him better access. He rammed inside my pussy like a mad man. I felt every inch dragging inside, every silver ball pressing on my nerves. I was painfully stretched, but the pleasure was overpowering.

I raised my head, and my eyes got fixed to the vanity mirror that was inches away from me. The image knocked the air right out of my lungs. Hugo was behind me, all muscle and brute force, hunched over my body, looking straight at the place where our bodies joined. The erotism was intoxicating. Looking at us fucking had the same effect on me like someone put a cloth over my mouth. The air became thick, and it suddenly became too much.

“Oh, my God! Hugo!”

“Just like that, baby girl. Say my name. Show me you know who’s doing this to you.”

“Fucking hell, Hugo, I can feel everything.”

The climax hit me again, this time bringing raw wildness with it. My pussy squeezed Hugo, not wanting to ever let him go and in my struggle to get it under control, I slammed my fist into the mirror, bringing it to pieces. My pleasure triggered his, and suddenly, he pulled out, releasing his cum all over my back. The sound he made was inhumane – the howling of a hungry, savaged wolf, and it was a symphony for my heart. Both of us were left dry. We had nothing more to give.

I don’t know how much time passed until one of us dared to move. It might have been a minute; it might have been an hour.

"Wow," I murmured.

“Yeah.”

“It…I…It was never like that before. Have you ever…”

“No, baby girl.”

“With anyone?”

“Before you I had sex, Cat. This wasn’t sex. You made the earth fucking move.” He paused and pulled me up in the most careful embrace, knowing exactly what I needed. “I have to go, princess.”

“Damn.”

“I know, I hate it too. Are you ok? You seem shaken.”

“I am. I just felt something way beyond an orgasm.”

He winked.

“Did you cut yourself in the mirror?”

“No. I’ll have it cleaned up after you leave.” I kissed him again, lingering on his lips as much as I could, trying to steal us a few more seconds. Let me walk you out.

Hugo tucked his dick away, and I tried to make my dress look less wrinkly with no result.

I was still gathering my composure when we walked out of my bedroom, and I was not prepared for what was waiting for us on the other side of the door. Lola was leaning on a wall with her arms crossed and her face blank, looking straight at my bedroom door. There was no expression on her face, nothing in her eyes, and when I saw her, my heart turned to ice and so did Hugo behind me.

“Jesus, Lola, you scared the hell out of me. I didn’t hear you come down here.”

“Not surprised.”

Shit. I had to fix this before she sent Hugo into a panic attack.

“Hugo helped me move some things in my closet to make space for something Gino got me. He almost knocked down one of my shelves.”

“Mhm.” She was not convinced. “Well, Cenzo is getting tired; he ate too much again, and I wanted to say goodbye before we left.”

“I was just on my way out.” Hugo mumbled to no one in particular and disappeared down the stairs like the FBI was on his tail again. I tried my best not to look in his direction, but my eyes slipped to him for a second.

Lola looked at me with shock.

“What the hell are you doing, Cat?”

“What? We got into a fight; it happens all the time.”

“What I heard was not a fight. You don’t beg people when you fight!” She started pacing around the room and panic spread through my system. “With your guard, Cat?”

“Lola,” I whispered her name as if it was a plea, “you can’t say anything, please!”

“No shit! You need to end this. You need to end this before Gino finds out, and he ships you off to a German orphanage or something.”

Not a possibility.

“I…can’t.”

She stopped dead in her tracks.

“Is he forcing you? Is he threatening in any way because I swear to Jesus Christ, I will…”

“No! God, no! What are you talking about? Hugo would never hurt me.”

“He seduced you!”

“I seduced him!” I yelled back. I was so tired of this. “I love him, Lola, I really do.”

A drape of tears covered my eyes, and she rushed to hug me.

“Oh, Cat. What do you even know about love?”

“Maybe not much, but I’m learning with him. Hugo loves me too. Please, Lola, you can’t say anything to anyone, not even Vincenzo. I have to tell Gino myself.”

She took a few seconds to reflect on the situation.

“You have my word,” she finally said, and I felt like a rock lifted off my chest. “This will end badly, Cat. I don’t know how Gino will ever forgive the fact that his best friend slept with his little sister. Under his roof.”

“He has to.” My voice was heavy with vehemence.

“You really love him, don’t you?”

“So much.” It was scary.

“Let me know if you need to talk, ok? About sex, Hugo, anything. Just come to me.”

“Thank you so much.”

She hugged me once more before going to the elevator and leaving me on an empty floor.

I was spent, emotionally dried from the fight, the orgasms and Lola showing up at my door. For the first time in my life, I couldn’t wait for Christmas to end.