More Than Once by Dominique Wolf

CHAPTER 13:

I

spent the next few days over-thinking. I'd gotten pretty good at it - in fact, I couldn't control it anymore. I kept replaying the time I spent with Giovanni over and over again. There was something more to it, more than just a physical attraction. It had to be. There was no way we could have that much passion and chemistry and it not develop into something more. Or was this a thing that I just didn't know about? I had never been the kind of woman to have once-off physical interactions with men, but here I was stuck in that exact situation. I'm not the same woman I used to be and I wasn't sure yet if that was a good thing or not. All I knew was that the way Giovanni was making me feel was new and exciting but also absolutely terrifying.

I didn't want to be feeling anything for anyone. When we were together, I was consumed by him and then when I left, I started to doubt what was happening. When it's just him and I, I knew he was feeling it too but then we didn't see each other, and I didn't hear from him for days or weeks, it turned my overthinking into overdrive. Reyna kept reminding me that she has never known him to have a girlfriend. He had never committed to one woman and I hated hearing that. A huge part of me got disappointed every time she mentioned it but then I think back to how we are together and I go crazy thinking this is possibly one-sided? Surely not. I couldn't be the only one stuck dealing with these unwanted feelings. The way he looked at me and touched me… you couldn't tell me he did that to others?

But then when I didn't hear from him, I started to feel like a statistic. I was also way too stubborn to be the one to reach out first. It was a terrible defense mechanism that I just couldn't break through. If this was how it was going to be then I should be able to flirt with whoever I want without him interrupting.

But I didn't want to be flirting with anyone else. I only wanted him.

This back and forth continued in my mind as Reyna and I walked into one of the bars on our road. It was a Sunday evening and Paradiso was the only place open that had energy to it. It was filled with people but nothing compared to Mala Mía. We were relaxing at home before Diego called and convinced us to join him for drinks. I wasn't working tomorrow and I didn't feel like continuing to wallow in my thoughts so I agreed to join. There was a crisp cold wind lingering in the air - Autumn was here but each day it was starting to feel more like winter already.

I scanned the area. I had never been here before but I was already enjoying the atmosphere. It had a dance-floor right in front of the bar and the rest of the place was scattered with high tables and bar stools. It wasn't meant to be a club but had the same vibe as one. We probably would've gone to Mala Mía but it was only open from Thursday to Saturday and I was actually glad for the change of scenery. It was already making me feel more at ease as it helped distract me from the on-going thoughts in my head. The DJ was playing my favourite kind of music - reggaeton. The type of music you couldn't help but move to. This was the Barcelona that I fell in love with.

We strolled through the crowd and found Diego at one of the high tables. His face lit up as soon as he saw Reyna. It made me smile. He was falling for her and as much as she ran away from her feelings, she was doing the same thing. I found Diego to be quite cute with his dirty blonde hair and light brown eyes that were a great combination. He was more on the skinnier side but he wasn't obsessed with his image like a lot of the other guys she has been with. He was kind-hearted and I was rooting for the two of them.

“Hey, Izzy.” Diego pulled me in for a quick hug.

“Thank you for letting me tag along,” I said, hopping onto the barstool. “Please don't tell me I'm going to be a third wheel though.”

He laughed, “Sergio and Katrina are coming too.”

“So I'm a fifth wheel?”

“Sergio mentioned he invited a few of his boys.”

“Maybe you'll get to see Giovanni?” Reyna quipped.

A part of me was hoping for that but the other part was honestly dreading it.

“What's going on between you two?” Diego asked casually.

“I don't know,” I admitted. “Nothing really.”

I wish I knew but I just didn't have the answers. I didn't know how to explain the situation to people.

“Well, Alessandro might be pleased to hear that.” Diego joked.

“I felt so bad for him last week. I don't know why Giovanni said he was my boyfriend.”

“He clearly wants people to think you're taken.”

“Well I'm not, so I should be able to do what I want.” I mumbled.

I didn't know why this conversation was annoying me so much. Who was Giovanni to dictate who I could have a relationship with? I could've definitely tried with Alessandro - he was attractive and interested in me. But no, Giovanni had to interrupt and take control of the situation.

“I thought you wanted Giovanni?” Reyna asked.

“The only thing I want right now is a drink.” I deflected and gestured for the nearest waiter. Diego and Reyna didn't push the conversation any further and I was thankful for that. I didn't know how to answer their questions and that was where most of my frustration stemmed from. I knew I wanted him - hell, all day every day, but I didn't know if I wanted wanted him. Or maybe I was trying to convince myself I didn't.

A pretty waitress came by and we ordered a round of cocktails to start off. A year ago, if someone had told me that I would be spending most of my weekends out in Barcelona drinking, I never would have believed it. Who would have thought?

***

A few hours had passed and Katrina, Sergio, Alonzo and Jose joined us. We were on our third round of drinks and Reyna and I were definitely already intoxicated. This was evident by our uncontrollable laughter. We didn't even know why we were laughing, but we were. Diego came back to the table with a bottle of tequila in his hands.

Reyna and I groaned in perfect unity which only made us laugh even more. Alcohol really created the illusion that everything was fine. When you're intoxicated, you don't have to care about things that you otherwise would. After a round of shots, the music was blaring Con Calma by Daddy Yankee louder than ever.

“My song!” Reyna shrieked and reached for my arm, pulling me to the dance floor.

I reached for Katrina and made her join us too. The three of us were in the middle of the dance floor singing the words at the top of our lungs. Granted I only knew the one line but I didn't care, I was enjoying this way too much. I put my hands in the air and swung my hips from side to side. I accidentally swung my arms too much to the side and ended up knocking someone in the head. He reached for his head as I turned to face him.

“Oh shit! I am so sorry!” I shouted and reached for his head, rubbing it better.

I was pretty sure he didn't need that but I felt so bad.

“It's okay,” he chuckled. “You've got to be careful with those killer dance moves you've got there.”

I giggled. He was super cute. Dark brown hair and light brown eyes but his soft features made him so sweet looking. Don't get me wrong, he didn't look like a child with his beard that was starting to grow out but there was nothing “bad boy” about him. I was starting to realize that most men in Barcelona were a sight to behold in their own way.

“Please forgive me. Sometimes the music just takes over.” I shouted.

He nodded and smiled, “I'm Lorenzo.”

“Isabella,” I said, extending my hand.

“Oh no, I'm a hugger.” He opened his arms. I was thrown off but in a good way. He pulled me in and I couldn't help but breathe him in. Fuck, he smelled so good. I was aware of my tolerance level and I had already passed the filter checkpoint.

“You smell so good.” I blurted out.

“Thank you, Isabella,” he laughed. “Can I buy you a drink?”

I nodded. I caught Reyna's attention and gestured to Lorenzo and the bar. She smirked at me and continued dancing. We made it to the bar and I found one of the few barstools still open. I slid myself onto one, giving my feet a break from all the dancing.

“Are you here alone?” I asked, leaning my elbow on the bar. Lorenzo ordered us two drinks and turned back to me.

“I'm not,” he explained. “I'm actually here for my sister’s birthday.” He pointed out a petite brunette in the crowd and she was just as attractive as he was.

“How old is she turning?”

“Twenty-three,”

“Are you older or younger?”

“Older. I'm twenty-six. What about you?”

“Twenty-four.”

The bartender handed us our drinks. I sipped on it and it was strong, I couldn't help but make a funny face which immediately made Lorenzo burst out laughing.

“What is this?” I asked, trying to regain composure of my face.

“Long Island Iced Tea.” he sipped on his with such ease.

“Obviously your drink of choice since you're sipping on it with no problem.”

He chuckled, “Yeah I've clearly had more practice than you.”

The more I looked at him, the more attractive he became. That was another one of the many perks to living in Spain - all the men were attractive. I didn't know if it was something in the water but they all had it.

“So, is this the part where we exchange awkward small talk?” I mused.

“God I hope not, I hate that.”

“Me too!” I exclaimed. “We can just jump right into the deep stuff then.”

“Let's not get too deep,” he chuckled. “I'm only on my first drink.”

“I am way ahead of you then,” I said laughing. “Drink number four right here. Excluding a shot of tequila.”

“Well, you seem to be handling your alcohol really well. Most people would be falling over.”

“I have a surprisingly high tolerance for someone who never used to drink.”

“Never used to drink huh?” he repeated. “So what changed?”

“I didn't feel like being stuck up anymore.” I admitted. A part of me always knew I had that tendency. It wasn't intentional but everything in my life before moving to Barcelona molded me that way. I was such a bore and way more judgemental than I wanted to be. Now… I didn't care.

“I like your honesty.” he smiled.

Someone pushed in next to Lorenzo to get the bartender's attention which forced him to scoot closer to me. Close enough that I could smell that cologne of his. A great smelling cologne on an attractive man was my weakness. Just another one, of the many reasons, I found myself attracted to Giovanni.

Why did he always have to invade my thoughts?

“Here's some more honesty for you,” my mouth was running away with itself and I couldn't stop it. “You're very attractive.”

He gave me a crooked smile and his eyes lit up. He placed his hand on my thigh and I didn't remove it. I actually kind of liked it.

“Well, Isabella,” Lorenzo murmured. “You're quite beautiful yourself.”

I couldn't help but blush. I was terrible at accepting compliments but it made me smile.

“Look at that,” I announced. “We went straight to being attracted to each other. No small talk needed.”

Lorenzo smiled and moved closer to me, his arm brushing up against mine, “So what should we do about that?”

There was definitely something here and it intrigued me. I was sipping on my drink when a figure caught the corner of my eye. I turned to the door and there he was.

Giovanni.

And he wasn't alone.

Strolling in on his arm was the same tall, blonde beauty I had seen a couple of times before at Mala Mía. There was definitely something between the two of them - I had seen it previously in the way they would interact with each other. I had never met her but I noticed her. Even from this distance, you could tell she was beautiful.

And she was here with him.

They moved like a couple and a huge rush of disappointment washed over me. I didn't hear from him for weeks and now this? I was actually pretty pissed off about it. My eyes immediately searched for Reyna who was already looking at me with concerned eyes.

I turned back to Lorenzo, “Could you please give me one second?” I asked, trying my best to keep it all together. “Don't go anywhere.”

“Sure.” Lorenzo said.

He was clearly confused but he said nothing further. He took a seat on the barstool I got off of and I pushed my way through the crowd to Reyna. Katrina was still with her and Diego joined them too.

“Who is that?” I asked her.

She nodded, “Casey Fonseca. She's a model that he's hooked up with in the past.”

A model?Of course he was sleeping with models. My eyes flicked back to Giovanni and Casey who had now joined our table.

“Not a fuck,” I blurted out. “Is he seriously joining us?”

“Sergio invited him.” Diego said, sheepishly.

I rolled my eyes. Of course, he did. Giovanni brought someone else to a place where he knew I'd be? After sleeping with me? Multiple times? And making it out like he was my boyfriend the last time we were together? He acted possessive but then pulled this on me?

Now I was really angry.

“Forget about him, Isabella,” Katrina said softly, placing a reassuring hand on my arm. “He's bad news.”

“I just feel so stupid.” I admitted.

“What do you have to feel stupid about?” Reyna tried to comfort me. “Just think of him as multiple one-night stands. You got what you wanted out of him, not the other way round.”

She was right. I was attracted to him and wanted to sleep with him, which I got to do, so I technically got what I wanted. What I didn't want was this rush of feelings that consumed me on top of the magnetic sexual attraction I had to him.

Fuck, I knew he was trouble.

“You know what, let's forget this,” I announced. “I'm going back to Lorenzo and I'm not going to let this affect me.”

They all cheered me on with an underlying tone of concern that I ignored. I didn't care about Giovanni. He could be with whoever the fuck he wanted. If he wanted to be like that then so could I. I knew the amount of alcohol in my system was probably making me completely unreasonable but there was no way to stop it. As I turned to go back to Lorenzo, I caught Giovanni's eye. He looked straight at me but I looked away immediately, not interested in giving him any attention.

I apologized to Lorenzo for taking too long and made some space for myself against the bar. We were closer now. We had to be considering the place had filled up even more. I turned to the bartender and ordered two tequilas.

“Sorry, I didn't even ask if you drank tequila.” I said to Lorenzo.

“Well, I do so that works out.”

I smiled. He was so nice. Here was a nice, attractive guy - just like Alessandro. We were both attracted to each other and I was not going to let Giovanni ruin that for me this time around. The bartender placed the shot glasses down in front of us. We both took them and placed the empty glasses back down on the table. It burned through me but this time, I was enjoying it. I turned to Lorenzo and out of nowhere, I threw myself at him. My lips crashed down on his. He tasted of tequila and faint cigarettes. I was scared that he would push me away but he didn't. Instead, his arms encircled my waist and he pulled me closer to him. I flicked my tongue over his and my hands found his hair. I couldn't help it - everything I was feeling just reached its climax and I didn't want to face any of it. I just wanted to make out with this attractive man at the bar. My body wasn't nearly as awake as it was to Giovanni's body, but I didn't want to think of him right now. I wanted to focus on Lorenzo. I felt his hand slide down the small of my back and rest over my ass. A feeling that should have set me alight but instead, suddenly made me aware of what I was doing. I pulled away, trying to catch my breath.

“I'm sorry, I don't know why I did that.” I said, embarrassed by my actions.

“I'm not complaining,” he reached out and grabbed my hand. “No need to apologize.”

I looked at him and he was being sincere. In fact, he was smiling and my embarrassment subsided temporarily. This time he pulled into me and I didn't stop him. His tongue flicked over mine and my hand made its way through his hair again. Fuck - he was a great kisser. I pulled away to catch my breath and he smiled down at me.

“Do you want to dance?” he asked.

“I'd love to.”

With my hand in his, he led me to the dance floor. As soon as I turned from the bar to the rest of the area, my eyes found his again. Giovanni was glaring at me from across the room and I knew he had just witnessed what happened between Lorenzo and me. This time I didn't look away. I stared right back at him, showing that he didn't dictate my actions. He didn't have control over me.

Even if I was lying to myself, I would put up the front. He didn't get to parade around here with some other woman and expect me to wait on the sidelines. Not going to happen. I was so angry with him. I knew we had no obligations to each other and that this was supposed to be a casual arrangement but it felt like more than that. It felt like more than just a hookup and the fact that I was clearly wrong about all of this was what hurt the most. I was embarrassed and disappointed in myself for handing myself over to him so easily. Not that I felt I had any choice in the matter - even now, standing in this public place with all these people, his mere presence had awoken my body. I was betrayed by it and I had to work incredibly hard to ignore my screaming desire.

Lorenzo guided me to the middle of the dance floor and placed my hands around his neck. His hands slowly slid down my back and ended up on either side of my waist. We let the music guide us and our bodies found the perfect rhythm to the music. He knew exactly what he was doing with his body and it increased his sex-appeal. I pushed myself closer to him, trying to ignite something inside of me. It was there but only a faint flicker. There was no way my body could hand itself over to anyone else knowing very well that Giovanni was in the room. I allowed my eyes to flick over to our table. He was still there but this time he wasn't looking at me. He was whispering something in Casey's ear.

Fuck. I was jealous.

Something I never wanted to feel and yet I was. It made me feel sick to my stomach. Giovanni showed me a world of pleasure and passion but also his softer side. His more vulnerable side when he played for me. His soft kisses and intimate gestures. The small little moments like that were what made it impossible for me to believe that this was one-sided. I was starting to feel suffocated by all of this bubbling over in my mind.

I broke away from Lorenzo's rhythm, “I'm sorry, I just need some air.”

Without even a second glance, I turned towards the exit. I pushed myself through the crowds of people and finally made it outside. I took in a deep breath as the fresh air filled my lungs. The sun had set but the lights on the street kept the area perfectly illuminated. I ran my fingers through my hair and leaned against the wall. What was I doing? I was incredibly frustrated at myself for what I was feeling. I gave myself strict instructions to keep my walls up and yet a few of those damn annoying feelings had found their way through. This was ridiculous. I was being ridiculous now. So I slept with some guy a few times? Big deal.

Get over it, Isabella.

But I couldn't. I was too intoxicated to control my true feelings. What I needed was to get out of here. I could just walk right now and head back home but I didn't want Reyna to worry and I left my bag at the table. The table where Giovanni and Casey were. The table I didn't feel like having to go to.

“Are you alright?”

I turned and there Lorenzo stood. He was concerned for me. It made me smile, but I knew I was being unfair to him. He was a sweet stranger and I didn't want to involve him in my problems.

“Yes. I'm sorry. I'm just suddenly not feeling well.” I lied.

“Do you want me to take you home?” he offered.

Ah, my heart.

“You're so sweet for offering Lorenzo but it's okay.”

“Let me take you home, Isabella,” he insisted. “I promise I just want to make sure that you get there safely.”

I reached out to him and rubbed my thumb over his cheek, “You are so wonderful but I promise I'll be okay. I'm not that far from here and I'm going to see if my roommate is ready to leave too.”

As much as I wanted to take Lorenzo up on his offer, I really needed to be alone right now.

“Okay. Can I call you though?”

I nodded and gestured for him to give me his phone. He did and I quickly put my number in.

“You'll be hearing from me.” he announced proudly and leaned down, leaving a kiss on my cheek.

We went our separate ways as we stepped inside. I needed to find Reyna and get out of here. I scanned the area and noticed that Giovanni and Casey were no longer by the table. I made my way there and reached for my bag.

“Are you leaving?” Jose asked, which startled me and made me jump.

I nodded, “Have you seen Reyna?”

He pointed to the bar where Reyna and Katrina were. I pushed through the crowd to get to them.

“I was wondering where you went. You had me worried,” Reyna noticed my bag. “Are you leaving?”

“Yeah. I have too much alcohol in my system to make any good decisions so I need to head home.”

“Okay let me grab my-...” Reyna started but I interrupted her.

“No, you're staying,” I commanded. “I'm just going home, Rey. It's literally up the road and I need some time to think.”

“Are you sure?” Katrina asked.

I nodded, “Yes. You guys enjoy, okay? I promise I'm fine.”

After exchanging goodbyes, I turned to leave. I didn't even bother saying goodbye to the guys, I knew Reyna would do it for me. I just wanted to get home right now. As I made it to the door, someone grabbed my arm. I turned around and it was Giovanni.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

I stopped and jerked my head back, “Seriously?”

“What?”

I did not have the energy to get into anything with him right now. I needed to get out of here.

“I'm going home.” I jerked my arm out of his grip and pushed through the door.

He followed me onto the street. I was consumed by so many emotions right now and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to hold it together.

“Hold on, Isabella.” He reached for my arm again, forcing me to stop.

I pulled my arm away from him again.

“What do you want?” I snapped.

“I think we need to talk.”

I rolled my eyes and laughed. Was he being serious? I looked at him and it hurt more that he was looking as good as ever. He was always looking good and I hated that.

“Look, Giovanni,” I started. “You and I have nothing to talk about. There's clearly nothing going on between us and I have no energy left in me to continue to be just one of the girls you sleep with. That's not happening again. It was fun while it lasted but now please just leave me the hell alone.”

And with that, I was gone.

And he didn't follow.