Holding Her Heart by Melissa Tereze
26
Eden placeda gentle hand on Blair’s knee, stopping her from repeatedly bouncing it up and down. Blair was a nervous wreck, but Eden needed her to remain calm. Worrying wouldn’t solve anything, but that was easy for Eden to think; she wasn’t the one potentially about to lose the love of her life. And that’s exactly what Dom was to Blair. The way they looked at one another, how they fit together so effortlessly…Eden couldn’t have wished for a better partner for Blair than Dom. All the years of worry disintegrated once she saw the smile on Blair’s face.
“Love, it’s all going to be okay.”
Blair shook her head, biting her nails. “It’s not. I can feel myself losing her, Eden. And you know what? I wouldn’t blame her for running away. I’d deserve it.”
“No, you wouldn’t.”
“The same way I deserved the twenty years I had with Barrett.”
Anger flared in the pit of Eden’s stomach, rising through her body in milliseconds. “Don’t you fucking dare!”
“Oh, come on. We both know I’m a piss-poor wife. It wouldn’t be any different with Dom. She’d see right through me eventually. When that phase of a happy life wears off, when she discovers I’m nothing more than a waste of space, Dom would be disgusted with the decision she’d made in marrying me.”
That saddened Eden more than she’d thought it possibly could. Blair had done so well to work through the issues Barrett left her with. Eden couldn’t bear to see her revert back to the vulnerability and low self-esteem. It was too painful the first time around.
“I think I should leave. Head home.” Blair got to her feet and moved towards the floor-to-ceiling window. She leant against the frame, staring out at the city. “I always knew I’d fuck up, Edes. I’ve told myself time and time again that it would be different with Dom, but I’ve hurt her, and I know she’ll never look at me the same way again.”
A key in the door had Eden’s head turned. She’d never been so happy to see Aster. And then she spotted Dom walking in behind her. God only knew what was about to happen.
But then Blair spoke again, unaware they now had company.
“She should be with someone who doesn’t still live with the past. And she should be with someone who can give her everything she needs. The idea of being her wife was a dream come true, but I’ve been fooling myself all along.”
Eden swallowed as Dom stood in the middle of her apartment, frowning. Aster rounded the couch, taking a seat beside her, their hands finding their way to one another. Aster squeezed, offering a small smile.
“I’m so happy you found Aster. Just don’t make the same mistake I did and fuck it all up. Losing the best thing to ever happen to me is more painful and devastating than every last punch Barrett landed on me.”
“Blair…” Eden said, her best friend breaking her heart with every word she spoke.
“I could deal with that, I always knew when it was coming, but this…I can’t deal with this,” Blair paused, pushing off the frame, her eyes focused on the busy roads outside. “So, I’m going to go home and pack some things. Dom loves our place, so I’ll leave for a while. She can stay there. Just…make sure she’s okay for me. Check in on her.” Blair turned, her face pale as she focused on Dom. “Y-you’re here.”
“And I always will be,” Dom said, her voice hoarse and filled with emotion as she crossed the room and took Blair’s face in her hands. “Kissing away every reminder you have of him. Replacing every memory of his fists with my hands instead.”
Eden wiped a tear from her cheek, side-glancing in Aster’s direction when she heard her girlfriend sniffling. They were a right pair when it came to emotions.
“And things aren’t okay, but I can’t walk away from you. I’m angry and disappointed, but I can’t imagine a life without you, Blair.”
“If I’ve destroyed everything, if you need to walk away because it’s the best thing for you, I’ll be okay. But if that day does come, I need you to know that I never meant to hurt you. And that I do trust you.”
“It’s something we need to talk about.”
Blair lowered her eyes. “I can live with talking.”
“Now, did you want to head back and give Eden and Aster some space?”
Eden stood and crossed the room. “You can stay as long as you want. Both of you.”
Blair smiled, pulling Eden into a strong hug. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“I think it works both ways,” Eden said as she took a step back. And she meant it. Without Blair, Eden wouldn’t have found herself falling in love recently. “Should I order in for the four of us?”
“No. I think it’s time we went home and sat down to talk.” Blair took Dom’s hand.
Eden knew things were different at the moment, but in time, everything would be back to normal. She had no idea what Aster had said to Dom, but it had worked. “Well, call me when you’ve both spent a few days alone, okay?”
Dom moved back into the living room, crouching down in front of Aster as she took her hands. “Thanks for being there, mate. I owe you big time.”
“You don’t. I just want us all to be happy.”
Dom got to her feet, placing a hand on Aster’s shoulder and squeezing. “Drinks are on me next time we head out into the city.” And then she turned to Blair, holding out a hand and cocking her head towards the door. “Come on. Let’s fix this mess at home.”
Eden watched Dom and Blair retreat out of the front door, arms wrapping around her from behind as the door closed. Aster’s lips found her neck, soft and wet, and just the idea of her mouth reaching other places had Eden’s body on alert.
Eden turned in Aster’s arms. “What did you say to Dom?”
“Just what she needed to hear.” Aster leaned in, a languid kiss dragging a moan from Eden’s throat. “She needed to remember what was important. How different things could be.”
Eden’s forehead creased.
“I asked her to imagine a world, a life, without Blair,” Aster said, her head cocked as she pulled back and focused on Eden. “The one thing that terrifies me lately is imagining my life without you in it, so I told her to imagine the same thing. I’m not very good when it comes to figuring out people’s relationships, so I went with what I thought was best.”
“I don’t think anyone has ever been afraid to lose me…”
“I don’t want to scare you off, we haven’t been dating for that long, but you mean so much to me, Eden. The night you showed up at my place because my dad was ill…it was that night when I realised just how much I wanted you in my life. By my side. And I know we weren’t even together at that point, but it was the concern you had for me and my family that did it. Nobody has ever done something like that before.”
“I didn’t want you to be alone.”
“It meant so much.”
Eden nuzzled into Aster’s neck, resting her head on Aster’s shoulder. She felt safe, warmth spreading throughout her. “My life has had a major change, but I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else or with anyone else.”
“Good, because I’m not going anywhere.”
* * *
“Mm. Dinner was lovely. As always.” Aster pressed a kiss to the base of Eden’s neck, one hand falling to her thigh. They’d had another evening together, and every night seemed better than the last. Aster couldn’t complain. Spending time with Eden outside the office was all she could have dreamed of when she first laid eyes on this woman. “But you know what’s really lovely?”
“W-what?” She felt Eden shudder, her palms flat against the dining table.
“You…in this skirt.” Aster smiled against Eden’s skin, her hands slipping around the front of her blouse. As she popped the buttons slowly, Eden released an audible moan. “Very, very lovely.”
“Aster…” Eden stood upright, gripping the edge of the dining table.
“Yes, beautiful?”
“I-I need to clear the table away.” Eden trembled against her, but it only spurred Aster on. When she had a woman trembling, she was never going to step away. Not in this lifetime.
“Yeah, that’s not really what I had planned.” She glanced over Eden’s shoulder as she got to her tiptoes and frowned. There was barely a thing on the dining table. “And I don’t think it really requires much tidying up, do you?”
“Well, no.”
Aster slipped Eden’s blouse from her body, her lips pressing softly against one shoulder, then the other. Eden’s subtle perfume—intoxicating as ever—reached Aster’s nose, a smile instantly settling on her face. “You’re gorgeous,” Aster whispered against Eden’s skin, lowering her hand to Eden’s thigh and dragging her nails up and under her skirt. “Turn around. I want to kiss you.”
Eden turned, her legs shaking. She rested back against the dining table, wrapping her legs around Aster’s waist as she dragged her into a heated kiss. Eden’s fingers tugged at the button on Aster’s jeans, and then they lowered her zipper, sending Aster’s body wild with want.
She leaned in, taking Aster’s earlobe between her teeth. “And I want to fuck you.”
Aster suddenly found their positions reversed, Eden’s hands pushing her further back on the table. But it was the urgency from Eden as she curled her fingers around the waistband of Aster’s jeans that had her lifting her hips and willing to do anything Eden required. “Eden, shit.”
Eden quirked an eyebrow. “What?”
“You. Like this. It’s so fucking hot.” Aster wrapped her legs around Eden and pulled her closer, claiming her lips with the very same urgency Eden’s hands had. She nipped at Eden’s bottom lip, moaning into her mouth as she massaged Aster through her underwear. Right now, tonight, she’d never been so wet. Or so desperate to be taken.
“Babe, you’re killing me.”
“Lift,” Eden demanded as she hooked her fingers around the crotch of Aster’s underwear. “You may be desperate for more, but so am I.”
Once her underwear was discarded, Aster studied Eden’s eyes. This was the first time since they’d met that Eden had taken control during those intimate moments. But Aster wasn’t worried. This woman knew exactly what she was doing and exactly what she wanted. Aster sat back on her elbows, her bare legs dangling over the edge of the table. “Where do you want me?”
Aster’s arms gave out when Eden palmed her thighs, those soft fingertips dipping between her legs and spreading them. “Knees up, beautiful.”
Aster complied, lifting her head slightly only to catch Eden staring, her lip between her teeth. If she was going to do what Aster imagined, this was entirely new territory for Eden. But the mere thought had fresh arousal gathering between Aster’s legs. Eden had an incredible mouth; she was more than welcome to use it wherever she pleased.
And then Eden dipped her head, smoothing her palms over Aster’s thighs as she kissed along her lower belly. Aster’s stomach tightened, her fingers hopelessly gripping at the table, but when Eden’s lips enveloped her clit, she lost her mind completely. “O-oh!”
“Mm.” Eden released her clit slowly, licking her lips before she dove back in. Aster could only watch in delight, her knees trembling with every swipe of Eden’s tongue. “You taste so good.”
“Oh, fuck!” One hand held the back of Eden’s head, the other flying up to Aster’s forehead. This…was heaven. “Shit, yes. Right there.” She bucked against Eden’s mouth, quivering as her orgasm drew closer, throaty moans the only sound in the apartment. “Y-yes.”
Eden sucked Aster’s clit between her lips, filling her with two fingers. It was in that moment that Aster knew her world would turn black any second now. This woman, her hands, that delicious mouth…life couldn’t possibly be the same again. And then Aster’s walls tightened when Eden released a throaty moan of her own, the vibration plunging Aster over the edge.
She arched up from the table, her thighs closing around Eden’s head as she cried out into the open space. But Eden didn’t slow, she didn’t stop, she just drank Aster in as though her life depended on it. “Shit, babe.” Aster’s entire body trembled. She’d never had an orgasm quite like that. Eden…yeah, she knew how to work a woman up. No doubt about it.
“God.” Eden lifted her head, her fingers still buried inside Aster, and leaned into a kiss as she slowly coaxed whatever she could from Aster. Tasting herself on this woman would always produce the expected results for Aster. She wanted more. No, she needed more. And then Eden pulled back, a shy smile on her mouth. “H-how was it?”
“Oh, you’ve no idea.” Aster sat up, pressing her upper body to Eden. “But I’m about to show you. Bedroom, now!”