Kite In The Snow by Karla Lopez
I stare at the walls of the hospital as I wait to hear about Mae and bean. She’s been in surgery for two hours, and I don’t know what to do with myself. I get up and walk around the hospital aimlessly but with every step my heart is in my throat. I’m terrified of what the outcome will be.
I sit down in the middle of the hallway and just take a break from all the thoughts eating away at me. Mae can’t fucking die. This isn’t how her story ends. She deserves to be happy, at least if it’s for a moment in her life.
I hear footsteps getting closer, and I look up expecting to see the doctor, but it’s James and Camila. I forgot that I sent them a text when I first got here.
“What are you guys doing here?” I look at them in confusion while James sits on one side of me and Camila on the other.
“You never responded when I asked how things were. We waited, assuming that she went into labor, but that was five hours ago. I don’t fucking know how long labors last.” James looks distraught at the thought of labor, and I give a humorless chuckle.
“Bean was born about two hours ago. They had to run Mae into emergency C-section, then something happened. The doctor was saying she was bleeding out, but no one has told me anything since then.” I feel the tears clinging to my lashes, and I blink rapidly to get rid of them.
“Man, she’ll be okay.” James puts his hand on my shoulder.
“Yeah, maybe no news is good news,” Camila offers, and their comfort feels good, but the fear simmers at the pit of my stomach.
“If she dies—”
“Stop, Wyatt. She won’t die.” James’s eyes meet mine and there’s desperation for me to have faith that everything will be okay.
“She didn’t even get to see her son,” I whisper. “They just took him away and kicked me out. The shitty life she has lived and the one joy she had; she didn’t even get to see. It’s so unfair.” I feel the tears streak my cheeks, and I don’t even have the energy to wipe them away.
“Wyatt, she was happy. Here with us. With you. You made her feel safe and gave her a home, something she’s never had. She told me so. You gave her a piece of happiness.” Camila’s brown eyes shine with unshed tears.
Her words make my world stop. It adds to the love I feel for Mae. It feels good to know that I did that for her. She added so much more color to my world as well.
I hug Camila to me, overtaken by the emotions and James lays his head on my shoulder while we wait.
After twenty minutes, a nurse comes out smiling brightly toward me. “Your son is stable and ready to see his daddy.”
Camila and James give each other confused stares, and I’m assuming it’s because the nurses think I’m the dad.
I nod and follow the nurse to the other side of the wing of the floor we are on. Through a glass window, I see the only baby that was born today.
My Bean.
He looks so small and fragile. “You can come in and hold him. We like to get skin to skin with one of the parents, but mama is still in surgery, so we were thinking you’d like to do it.”
I just nod, speechless. All the emotions of seeing him is unreal. She gives me a mask and sits me on a rocking chair. She tells me to remove my shirt, and I do.
She gets bean out of his little incubator and walks him over to me. He has tubes that go into his tiny nose to help him breathe. As soon as his skin touches mine, I choke on a sob.
The emotions clog my throat. I stare at him in awe because he’s all Mae. I have this sense of possessiveness when it comes to Mae and bean, but this moment I have shared with them makes me never want to let them go.
“Hey, bean. I’m so happy I got to meet you today. I know it seems scary and not as warm as your mama, but I’m going to protect you with all I have. You just have to make sure to keep fighting and get stronger, okay?”
The monitor next to us spikes, and I look at the nurse as she smiles. “The skin to skin is working. His heart rate is keeping steady.”
I smile with so much pride. “Do you hear that, bean? You’re doing good buddy.”
After spending an hour holding him, I leave him sleeping in his crib while I go see if there’s any news on Mae. I see James standing in the hallway, and I roll my eyes as I watch him flirt with a nurse.
I walk over to him as she’s handing him her number. “Where’s Camila?” He turns to look for her as if he didn’t notice she left.
“She was just right here.” I shake my head at him.
“What?”
“You can at least do it when she’s not around.” He shrugs like it doesn’t affect him, but I know it does. Camila is exactly what he’s trying to stay away from. He thinks she’ll keep him from leaving if he does try something with her.
“How’s the baby?” I can’t help but smile.
“He’s doing good. He’s so beautiful, James. I know this might sound crazy, but he’s mine and so is Mae. I’m not leaving them or letting them go. This is my family. The family I always prayed for.”
His face softens. “I’ll never understand how you can want a baby that isn’t yours or a girl who you’ve barely met that has a really long road ahead of her.”
I chuckle. “Because you’ve never been in love.”