Envy by Eve Marian

24

Giancarlo

I turned onto the stone driveway toward the estate. The homes in this neighborhood were much older than mine. Old money, some called it. Generational wealth, others would say.

To me, it was hell.

I’d driven past this home countless times since moving to upstate New York. It was the reason I came in the first place. To create havoc in my half-brothers’ lives.

I had planned to steal everything they owned until they had nothing. But Sangunero got in the way. Then, a few months ago, an opportunity presented itself, and I couldn’t resist. It was the same opportunity that later brought Natacha to my doorstep.

Luke’s baseball.

Some guy from the neighborhood said he could steal a collector’s baseball for me. I wasn’t interested, of course, until he mentioned who owned the ball. Then I was all in. The guy’s plan went to shit. I had some fun at Crawford’s expense, and ultimately, I still kept the ball.

But the best part of the whole ordeal was I got under their skin, like a poisonous tick.

I grabbed the black antique knocker on Luke’s front door and slammed it twice against the metal plate.

Knock! Knock!

The man himself opened the door. He wore blue jeans and a white T-shirt. His mouth flattened into a straight line and his eyes narrowed.

“You’re late.”

I shrugged. “Didn’t realize you were anxiously waiting for me. It’s sweet.”

Rolling his eyes, Luke stepped back. “Come in.”

I walked inside and immediately had to look down. There was an overbearing presence inside the home. Like a heavy weight pressing down on my shoulders.

This was her home.

I was told Luke bought and remodeled his childhood home. I didn’t want to think of my mother answering this same door or walking through the wood-paneled foyer to hug me when I returned from school.

Someone cleared his throat, and I looked up.

Colton stood at the end of the hallway; his brother Ryan was next to him.

“You won’t need your guard dogs for this meeting,” I said to Luke.

“They’re here because they wanted to be.”

“I’m flattered,” I said.

“Don’t be,” Colton shot back. I held back a grin. He and I were most alike, that was for certain.

Luke walked over to the gray sofa in the living room and pointed to one across from him. “Take a seat.”

I did.

Colton and Ryan sat on armchairs on either side of me. I was virtually boxed in with my back to the wall.

“I was surprised when you contacted me. I thought this was over when Natacha returned the baseball to me. We’re even now.”

Hearing her name on Luke’s lips unnerved me. It reminded me they’d hired her to sneak into my home. But I shook off the feeling. “We are. This has nothing to do with petty grievances. This is about our mother.”

A low growl resonated from my left, where Colton sat, but Ryan spoke up instead. “You never met her. So, you couldn’t possibly tell us anything about her.”

The reminder stung, but I wouldn’t let him intimidate me. “I spoke to my father.”

“Well, that’s all hearsay, and I won’t allow it.”

“Relax, Ryan,” Colton murmured. “Let the asshole speak.”

“Thanks,” I said, narrowing my eyes at Colton.

He nodded.

With my forearms resting on top of my knees, I stared at my hands. This was a lot harder than I thought it would be.

“I have a lot of questions, and I’m sure you do, too. That’s why I’m here. I think it’s time we figured this out.”

Luke inhaled sharply and slowly let the air out. “Yes, you’re right. We do have a lot of questions.”

I nodded. “You start.”

Ryan spoke up. “How do we know you are her biological son?”

“I have a birth certificate with her name on it, and my father’s. You can take a DNA test if you want.”

I explained what my sister had told me, the circumstances of my birth.

“That sounds like our mother,” Luke said, looking down and rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands. They were red.

My chest tightened, not because of Luke’s distress, but my own. I wanted to know the answer to my next question, but the implication that I had no idea hurt. “What was she like?” I asked.

Luke didn’t hesitate. “She was the most attentive, loving, patient person in our lives.”

It felt as though he’d taken a knife and run it through my heart. The pain shot through my chest.

Despite the pain, there was one more question I had to ask. “Did she ever mention me?”

Luke stared at me, and when I met his gaze, he turned away.

“No,” Colton said.

I swallowed past the lump in my throat.

What did I expect? She had said as much in her letters to me. She always talked about introducing me to her family, but it never happened.

“I’m sure it was too painful for her,” Luke added.

I scoffed. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Don’t talk about our mother like that,” Ryan warned.

It was strange to hear him say, our mother. As though he thought of us as brothers. I knew Ryan would hate to consider me family. The thought brightened my mood a bit.

“I have a question.” Ryan moved closer to the edge of his seat. “Why the hell did you lie about my girlfriend?”

I pursed my lips. “She was a means to an end.”

“What end?”

“To destroy you.”

Colton barked out a laugh, but his face didn’t seem happy. “Funny. I had the same plan.”

“Yes, you probably wanted to get back to me because of the ball and the whole situation with Ryan’s woman. But my anger stems from much earlier than that.”

“What anger? Why do you hate us when we’ve never even met?” asked Luke.

I opened my mouth and shut it, swearing inside my head. I wished I hadn’t said that. It was too close to the truth, and it made me sound weak. “Forget it,” I mumbled. “I got what I came for, and you 're right, now we’re even. It’s over.”

I stood, but Luke stopped me. “Wait. It’s not over until it’s all out. Why do you hate us and hate our mother? You can barely look at this house. I noticed as soon as you walked in. Did she say something in her letters to you?”

“Just forget it.” I shook my head but didn’t leave. The words were stuck in my throat, but they wanted to get out. I wanted to say it out loud, but not to them.

Luke shrugged. “It’s all right. We already think badly of you. It couldn’t get much worse.”

I laughed. “Oh, yes, it could.”

“Tell us.”

My mouth felt dry. I licked my lips. “I was jealous, okay? She chose you and left me behind. I wasn’t good enough for her. She was embarrassed of me, so she kept me a secret.” My chest heaved from the exertion of spilling my guts out. “There, I said it.”

“Well, that may be true,” Colton said.

“Fuck off, Colton,” I shouted.

Luke smiled.

“What?” I yelled at Luke.

Sitting on the couch, he gave a half-grin. “We sort of sound like brothers right now.”

My heart jumped. Did we?

My brother Robert and I never argued. We hardly spoke, and I have never told him to fuck off. Even though I’d wanted to. Somehow, with Colton, it was easier.

“Maybe she was embarrassed, especially because of what you do.”

“Ryan,” Luke warned. But Ryan stared at me, his eyes cold.

Ryan’s jab hit its mark, and I wanted to hit him back. Instead, I asked, “Why do you hate me so much, Ryan? Because I don’t think it’s just the Laura thing. There’s a blackness in your eyes that mirrors mine.”

He clenched his fists. “I’ve told you before, I’m nothing like you.”

The way his eyes snapped, I knew he was wrong. He could just as easily tear down a city as I could. “I’ve spilled my guts, now it’s your turn. If you fucking have the courage, say it. Why do you hate me?”

He shook his head, but his nostrils flared.

“Come on. Say it to my face,” I spat. If he was anything like me, calling him out like that would piss him off.

When he stood from the couch and pointed a finger at me, I knew I had him. “Because you made me hate her, you asshole!” he shouted. Ryan’s chest heaved and his eyes blazed. “She was perfect until I read your letter. When I realized she’d hidden something from us, and maybe even my father, I couldn’t look at her the same way again. I’ll never forgive you for that.” He seethed.

“It wasn’t his fault, Ryan,” Luke said.

Colton steepled his fingers together and blew into them. “What do we do now?”

There wasn’t anything to be done as far as I was concerned. “Nothing,” I said. “I stay out of your business and you stay out of mine. There’s nothing left for us to say.”

“Fine by me,” said Ryan.

“Right,” Colton agreed.

Luke hesitated.

He ran a hand through his light brown hair. He looked the least like any of us. Dropping his arms over his knees, he looked up at me. “Is that what you want?”

No.

Fuck, I mean yes.

I nodded, not trusting what would come out of my mouth.

“All right.” Luke rubbed his lips. “But then you have to stay away from her as well.”

“Who?”

“Natacha.”

My heart sank. I hadn’t thought about my next step with her, but I knew Luke was right. She deserved better. I was just too selfish to give it to her.

“I may not know you, but I know what you do. That life isn’t safe for her. Leave her out of it.”

Fuck.

My head fought internally with my heart. My head and conscience won. “Fine. I’ll stay away.”

Nodding, Luke stood from the couch and stretched out his hand. After I shook it, I saw Colton raise his hand out of the corner of my eye. I turned and shook hands with him, too. Ryan remained seated.

I walked toward the door, and Luke followed. “She wasn’t embarrassed of you,” he said to my back, and I stiffened. “She cared deeply. I read her letter. It killed her to not see you. I even remember days when she would cry as she wrote at her desk. It makes sense now. And as much as I hate to admit it… she loved you, John.”

John. It was the name my mother had called me. It was her father’s name. She thought it would change his mind. It hadn’t, my father explained. My dad added his name to it and called me Giancarlo.

Hearing the name was too much, I couldn’t turn around. I would turn into a crying ten-year-old boy if I did.

I simply lifted the collar on my jacket and walked out the door.