Protector Daddy by Taryn Quinn
THIRTEEN
Christian was being weird.Or I was being weird, because I couldn’t stop overanalyzing every little detail between us.
Granted, we were still super new. We’d only been getting naked on a regular basis for three weeks now, so I was far from an expert on the man. But even in that few weeks, once we’d started seeing each other more often, we’d developed a rhythm and I didn’t just mean when our clothes came off.
First, we spent a lot of time together. Mickey was threatening to find a new bestie. I’d suggested a double date and Christian had seemed okay with it, but that required Mickey settling on one guy long enough to make reservations somewhere.
And it also required us to spend some time outside his place or mine before we tumbled into bed.
Or on the floor.
Or against the stone tiles of his surround shower…or even one memorable time in his indoor pool. He had remarkable skills underwater.
We did talk in between. Sometimes during, though that was more of the filthy talk variety. Whenever he called me his beautiful good girl or praised my ability to come on his command…
Well, let’s just say that was a path to more of the same.
We watched movies and cuddled a lot and laughed over the in-jokes all couples seemed to share. I’d never had those jokes before. I’d never had any of this and some part of me was nearly desperate to put a name on it.
Here I was, the girl who’d never needed a label for a relationship before, and every day I had to practically bite my tongue to keep from asking Christian where we were going.
As perfect as everything was now, already I could feel the winds of change beginning to blow.
And not because Thanksgiving was days away, which meant so was winter. Central New York got cold and snowy fast this time of year, and as I stared out the police station window Friday afternoon, the sidewalks were beginning to pile with snow.
Decorations would soon line the streets of the Cove, with Halloween long since put away. It felt as if so much had changed so quickly.
My mom wanted to meet him. My dad wanted to go snowmobiling with him since mini golf season was long past. Yes, that was my eccentric father, who didn’t like regular golf and preferred the kind where you putt-putted your ball into a clown’s mouth.
I didn’t know how Christian felt about snowmobiling and I didn’t know how my dad could get to know him while flying over snow drifts in any case. And I didn’t think he’d enjoy my mom’s interrogation tactics in any situation. But I hadn’t mentioned it yet anyway because meeting the parents was a big deal.
As I knew since I was supposed to meet his family in two days and I was already twitchy about it.
At least I already knew Murphy from around town. He stopped into the bakery now and then and his sweet wife Vee was a baker at Brewed Awakening. Both of them were super easygoing and basically couple goals.
“Hey Honey Belle, got time for lunch?” I looked over my shoulder as Mav flashed me a relaxed grin that didn’t reach his eyes.
“Oh, it’s almost time for me to jump on the desk.” I shook my head. This having very regular sex thing was making me think every sentence I said had a perverted double meaning. “Well, not literally, of course.”
Mav rolled right over what I’d said as if I hadn’t spoken.
“You’re not on the schedule yet and I figured maybe you could escape for a half hour for a sandwich at Brewed Awakening?” He jerked a thumb over his shoulder toward the Dispatch desk. “Miranda’s still holding down the fort.”
“Brewed Awakening? Aren’t you being disloyal to Tab?”
“Tab is doing quite well without our twenty dollar bill for lunch.” Mav slung an arm around my shoulders. “I half expected you to say no.”
“Well, I didn’t exactly say yes.” Though now that he mentioned it, my stomach was on the verge of roaring, and I really didn’t think my PBJ on wheat and baggie of green grapes was going to be enough.
“Christian’s on patrol so don’t tell me you had a better offer.”
Yeah, and I’d really wanted to see him, even though I’d only rolled out of bed at his place six hours ago.
But I just felt…uneasy. I wasn’t even sure why. Everything was good between us. Better than good, actually.
“You really,” he paused, “like him, don’t you?”
“Yeah.” More than liked, but I didn’t say that to my brother. I hadn’t said it to Christian yet so he deserved to hear my feelings first. “More than anyone else ever.”
My brother’s mouth tightened as he stepped ahead of me to hold open the door and motion me out into the wind and the cold. As if I was still ten years old, he pulled my sweater together and did up the top couple buttons, making me shake my head on a laugh. “You know I can do that for myself, right?”
“Yeah. But it’s a habit.” Ears reddening, he shoved his hands in his pockets since he didn’t have on a sweater or jacket himself. “You’re still my little sister. I’m supposed to watch out for you. It’s my job.”
“Well, I appreciate it, but I’m pretty good about buttoning myself up these days.” I bit my lip. “Though I did tell Christian how you used to play Metallica for me in the middle of the night when it storms. He offered to play some for me.”
His brows drew together. “I just bet he did.”
“Mav, he’s a good dude.”
We took a right to head up the sidewalk crowded with lunchtime shoppers. Snow blinded me and I wondered if Christian had remembered his gloves. He tossed them on the dashboard of his truck or his cruiser and rarely remember to take them with him.
Maybe I could get him a spare pair for Christmas. Something leather and sleek and sexy.
So I could imagine his gloved fingers driving through my hair as we kissed by the gazebo as we had last week. And then after, he’d helped me feed the ducks because he was basically the cutest man ever.
“You’re going to be a good father,” I added when Mav remained silent.
I hoped he wasn’t brooding over Christian. Because I had no intention of walking away. The few misgivings I’d had in the beginning had dissolved into nothing.
Now the only misgiving I had involved wondering if he wanted to commit to me as much as I wanted to be his. And if he wanted that too, what was he keeping from me?
He had secrets. I knew that without a doubt. It was early days so I had faith he’d reveal them in time. Still, I was impatient. I didn’t doubt his fidelity—we spent so much time together, he didn’t have time for anyone else—but I could read the darkness behind his eyes he thought he hid so well. But he couldn’t hide it from me.
My brother swallowed hard enough for me to notice his throat jumping. “I hope so. Brady’s pretty much nailing it.”
“He nails everything.”
“Not anymore. That was last year’s Brady. He’s a properly married man now.”
We exchanged a look and laughed like loons as we turned to go into Brewed Awakening, dodging customers headed out with their hands full of bakery bags and steaming cups of coffee.
The scent of Macy’s strong full-bodied brew hit me full in the face as soon as I stepped inside. Normally, that was one of my favorite scents in the world. Today it seemed slightly off.
“Think Macy’s burning the beans?” I asked in an undertone, leaning close to Mav.
He let out a mock gasp. “Better not let her hear you say that. You’ll be tossed on your butt on the sidewalk.” He nudged me toward one of the tables near the large windows, festively chalk decorated for the holidays in bright colors. Most of the design was appropriately holiday-oriented, but since Macy was Macy, the turkey wearing a bright red stocking cap was being threatened by a knife-wielding Michael Myers stalking him from behind a nearby Stop sign.
I shook my head. Only Macy, man. Her Halloween love knew no bounds—and she paid no attention to the time of year. It was Halloween every day as far as she was concerned.
“Grab a table, Honey Belle. I’ll get your usual?”
“Sure. Just instead of coffee, I’ll take an Earl Grey tea,” I decided.
“Man, you’re serious about the coffee.” He feigned a shudder. “Going to hot tea. Next you’ll start carrying a bag of knitting with you.”
“Never know. I did see the cutest pattern for a duck onesie online. I’m thinking baby Mavan will look adorable in it.”
His dark brow arched. “Mavan? What, are we like Bennifer now?”
“If the couples name fits…” I giggled and pulled out a chair before dropping into it. “Go get our food before they run out.”
“Or before there’s a run on fancy schmancy tea.” He rolled his eyes and headed off to do my bidding.
He was a good brother, as things went. I’d almost completely forgiven him for his marital sin of leaving out his favorite sister from his elopement. I supposed I could see how he’d had other things on his mind.
I pulled out my phone and smiled as Christian texted.
Christian
I miss you.
That was it. Just those three words sent a rush of joy surging through my chest. Rather than answering right away, I just basked in the fact that a guy so fucking amazing—and hot and good in bed and sweet—missed me. I stared at those words until they blurred and then I held my phone to my chest and made sure Mav was still at the counter so I could let out a long feminine sigh of pure happiness.
Was this what being in love felt like? I had to assume so.
A beautiful dark-haired girl with strips of magenta in her hair rushed up to the counter, causing Mav to move to the side. “Hi, I’m sorry, I’m new here but I’m absolutely dying for a cherry mochaccino and I just heard you tell someone you were running low on cherry syrup.”
“Oh, sure, we have enough to make one more.” Vee smiled brightly at her, nearly busting out of her Brewed Awakening shirt under her apron. I was pretty sure she was pregnant with baby number four, I thought it was. But she’d had twins so only three pregnancies.
Still, whoa, that was a lot of babies close together. She was simply glowing though so she didn’t seem to mind.
She was married to Christian’s younger brother Moose. As local lore went, they’d danced around each other for a while and it had required a misplaced want ad for a baby daddy for them to get together, but they’d clearly been meant for each other.
Just like Christian and me? I could only hope.
“Reagan for the cup,” the girl called to Vee behind the counter.
Pretty name but that wasn’t why I did a doubletake. It was because of how my brother reacted. He turned to stare at her as if he knew her, opening his mouth then falling silent more than once.
She was super young. A teenager. How could he possibly know her? She’d said she was new in town.
I started to rise, even though I wasn’t sure why. Then another text came through and I forgot all about the cherry mochaccino chick.
Christian
I’m staking out a Super 8 off the highway. Wishing I was here with you for a different reason.
A tawdry motel? What kind of woman do you take me for, Officer?
Christian
The kind of woman I can’t get enough of.
I miss you too. A stakeout? That sounds dangerous. What happened?
I was still staring at my phone, willing him to reply when Mav returned with our tray of food and drinks. “Macy said Darjeeling was today’s special tea so she foisted that on me. I mean, on you. I hope you like it. If not, I might be convinced to let you have a sip of my—hey, earth to Honey.”
“Christian’s on a stakeout? For what? If I’d been on the Dispatch desk already, I would’ve known.”
“Miranda’s got it covered until we get back. Stakeouts are a routine part of police work.”
“In the Cove? What could he possibly be looking for? Someone who stole a pack of gum from the Qwik Mart?” Annoyed and not sure why, I snagged several fries off his plate. “Also, newsflash, that girl is way too young for you. Plus, hi, married?”
“What girl?”
I gestured vaguely as she spun around victoriously with her mochaccino in hand. Her smile was blinding—and familiar.
What was it about that girl?
She rushed out into the snow, careening around customers, disappearing in the endless flurries. And then I was back to worrying about Christian again.
Stakeout. What the hell?
“It’s routine, kid,” Mav said patiently, stoking my ire more. “Something you’ll have to get used to if you decide to shack up with Officer No-Nonsense on a more permanent basis.”
“I’d already be shacked up with him on a permanent basis if he wanted to.” I shoved more fries in my face and nearly let out a moan.
Were these always so delicious? Guess I was hungrier than I thought.
Mav took a bite out of his sandwich, then another before putting it back down again. I nodded at his plate and the fries I’d already decimated though I had my own with the pita pocket ham and swiss sandwich I’d hoovered half of already. “Steak sandwich not doing it for you today?”
“Van didn’t tell me she saw you and Christian making out on our wedding day.”
“Uh, yeah, I know.”
“She didn’t know if she owed allegiance to me or to you. She knew it would cause issues.”
“Okay,” I said slowly, still eating but at a much reduced rate. His tone was about to give me indigestion. “What’s your point?”
“I don’t know what the protocol is for this crap. Do I tell you what I know or do I let Christian tell you? He claims he’s going to. But it feels wrong for me to know something about his personal life that you don’t. Something huge and important that could change everything.”
I dropped my sandwich onto my plate as my phone sounded with a text. Probably Christian.
But I didn’t look. I couldn’t.
“If it helps, I won’t tell him you told me.” I hated that my voice was wobbling. Why had he told something important to my brother before he told me? Didn’t I matter to him more than that?
“He promised he’d tell you this weekend. Just…you need to know. It’s not fair to you that he gets to pick his moment and you don’t have any idea.”
I grabbed my tea and sucked it down, deciding immediately I was going back to coffee, burned beans or not. This just didn’t have the kick I needed.
“Just tell me.”
“Christian has a daughter. She wants to move here.”
“What?” My mind was spinning but I felt as if I was a dozen steps behind. “Move here? How old is she? And he told me he’d been celibate for a long time…”
Was that a lie? How much else was too?
“He had the kid with his high school girlfriend. She didn’t allow him to be part of the kid’s life. Set conditions on it and he was scared she’d abort the child so he agreed to them.”
I shoved aside my tray as my stomach twisted inside out. “He didn’t get to raise his own child?”
“No. Sounds like he only got to see her periodically. But Reagan is almost eighteen now and wants to move here for college, I guess, and to have a closer relationship with her father.”
Reagan.
I shoved my hands through my hair, not paying attention to my ponytail. Dragging it apart with my restless fingers and then shoving it back into a messy bun. “That girl at the counter.”
Mav nodded somberly.
“She’s beautiful. She doesn’t look like him but she has…she has his smile. Oh, God.” I jerked to my feet, clapping a hand over my mouth before I rushed across the busy café to the back hallway that led to the bathrooms. I hurried into the ladies’ room and booked over to the stalls, hurling my lunch into the first toilet I reached. I used my foot to hit the flusher and slumped against the wall, clutching my already settling midsection.
What the heck? I’d been shocked about the news, no doubt, but to toss my cookies without warning? I didn’t even feel sick.
Thankfully, no one was in the restroom when I finally emerged to rinse out my mouth and to wash my hands and face. I looked drained. Big dark eyes and absolutely no color in my cheeks.
As if I’d seen a…Reagan. A special kind of specter.
Specter of girlfriends past.
Christian had a baby. Well, almost grown baby now. Some nameless woman had given him a child and she hadn’t even wanted to.
And I wished it was me. Obviously impossibilities like the fact that I’d been six at the time Reagan was born aside.
I wanted to be the one who gave Christian a baby. And this woman hadn’t even cared.
I closed my eyes as someone knocked on the door and gently eased it open. “Hey Honey, you okay, sweetie?” Vee peeked in. “Mav asked me to check on you.”
“Oh, I’m fine, thanks.”
“Are you sure? He said he was worried you were sick.” She pushed open the door wider and the sight of her swollen belly made me grab hold of the sink.
Oh, God.
Nope, nope, nope. People were capable of having sex in this town without it ending in a fetus. I mean, I knew of people who’d had sex here who’d never been pregnant. Not a lot, granted. Like Mickey. She had a fairly active dating life and she’d never suffered the consequences pregnancy-wise.
Yet.
I curled my fingers around the edge of the sink until my knuckles went white and blurted the first thing on my mind. “How soon can you find out if you’re pregnant?”
Vee’s big green eyes widened as she shut the door behind her. “Depends,” she said carefully.
“On?”
“Well, lots of things. How well you know your body. If you’ve been pregnant before. If you’re having twins.”
My vision grayed around the edges and I leaned against the nearest wall, praying it would keep me upright. “If I faint, just leave me where I am until I come to.”
She smiled sympathetically. “I’m assuming you’re asking for you?”
“I’m not not asking for me.” Lightly, I banged my head against the wall. “You’d think people would know better. They know what’s in the water in this town and yet people still insist on having sex. What’s wrong with them? Me? What’s wrong with me?”
“The problem is having sex is very hard to resist, especially with the right man.” Vee leaned against the wall beside me. “Especially those Masterson men.”
I wasn’t blushing. I hoped. “Mmm-hmm.”
She shifted toward me. “Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I can come with you if you want to take a test.”
“I’m not pregnant. For one, it’s only been a few weeks.”
“Right.”
“No, I’m serious. I was just upset by some news I just got. That’s all. I didn’t feel sick or anything beforehand.”
There was no possible way I could be pregnant. We were so careful. Condoms every time. I took my Pill religiously. Sure, there could still be lapses, especially in this town, but not this time. Not with us.
He’s a known sperminator. This man has impregnated before!
I rubbed my now aching forehead. I was about to spiral. Hard.
The bathroom door opened. Vee whirled to hold up a hand to Mrs. Busbee. Of course. Another busybody, reporting for duty. “Sorry, this one is being cleaned.”
Mrs. Busbee cocked her head. “But these are the only bathrooms here.”
“Yeah, sorry. It will only take another couple minutes to finish cleaning.” Vee coughed loudly. “Sorry! Come back in five minutes.”
Mrs. Busbee left, muttering about not being able to get worthwhile employees anymore.
“I’m sorry for causing so much disruption.” I took a deep breath. “No more talking serious stuff over lunch. And my pita pocket and fries were delicious. I really wanted to eat the rest of them.”
“I’ll package you up some soup and crackers for later when you’re feeling up to it.” Vee rubbed my shoulder. “I’m pretty much immune to morning sickness at this point. Well, not immune, but it’s almost routine. This is our last one.” With her other hand, she patted her pleasantly round belly.
I eyed it as if her child might spring out fully formed at any second, ninja-style. “How far along are you?”
“Not as far as it looks, but that happens once you’ve had a few. You’ll see.” She laughed and then choked as if my face looked as horrified on the outside as I felt on the inside. “I mean, I’m sure you’re not. Might not be. I’m sure.”
“Are you just going from Cove lore? I don’t have some telltale sign.” I rushed over to the sinks to examine my face in the mirror just in case. Nope, I looked exactly the same as I had that morning as I’d gotten ready for the day.
With Christian standing behind me kissing my neck.
I buried my face in my hands. God.
“You look perfectly fine. It doesn’t show on your face.” Vee came up beside me, a few inches shorter than I was but somehow so much more formidable. And I wasn’t even referring to her baby belly. She just exuded strength. “I’m guessing you aren’t ready for a baby.”
“No!” At my outburst, I turned on the faucet and cupped cool water in my hand to splash my face. “Sorry. I’m flipping out. I know I am. I was flipping for one reason and now this.”
Christian was going to be known as the sperminator in my head going forward. Probably was a good thing he’d taken so many years off in between seminations. Who knew how many kids would be running all over if he hadn’t?
Vee rubbed my back. “If it makes you feel any better, Christian’s a stand-up guy. You don’t have to worry about him bailing. Trust me on that.”
“You’re biased.”
“I am, yes. And so are you. Whenever I say his name, your eyes get all crinkly.”
I splashed my face with more water. “I’m probably in love with him. And that’s so very bad.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m not thinking straight about him already. How am I supposed to make clear-cut decisions when my heart is already all messed up? Forget hormones or babies—”
The door burst open and I clamped down on my tongue so hard I tasted blood. Alas, it wasn’t enough to stop Mav from charging inside to challenge all comers, even if that included my possibly problematic uterus.
“I tried to give you time but you seemed sick and—” His jaw locked. “You did not just say hormones. Or babies. I’m gonna kill him. He is going to be dead at my hands. I won’t even need a weapon.”
Vee slapped her palm on his chest. “Calm yourself down, buddy. She does not need your testosterone spilling all over her right now. If there’s a situation, Honey is more than capable of handling it. Just as your wife is,” she added pointedly, which made my brother’s ears tinge red and his chest rise and fall even faster.
“There’s a situation? I knew it.” He turned away from Vee to slam his hands on the wall. “This is my fault.”
Vee’s pale brows lifted to flirt with her wispy blond bangs. “Okay, didn’t expect that one.”
“It’s not his fault. Just the timing of Christian and me getting together coincided with his marriage. Long story,” I assured her. “He’s just being melodramatic.”
“I should say so. Want me to leave you two alone? I’ll just go bag that soup.” She shot out the door before I had a chance to answer.
Who could blame her? Family squabbles were never something outsiders wanted to wade into. Hell, I didn’t want to wade into it either and he was my brother.
My pain-in-the-ass lovable brother.
“Mav, take a breath,” I advised, patting his back. “You’re not pregnant so chill out.”
“You’re pregnant? Are you sure? Why?”
“No, I’m not sure. I’m hoping I just ate my food too fast or something. Or my stomach violently opposes Christian having a daughter almost my age.” I squeezed my eyes closed. “I can’t go back to work today. I’ve only had this job a couple weeks, but I just can’t do it. I know he’s on that stakeout now, but he’ll come back and if he looks at me…” I pursed my lips. “I have to be rational about this. I’m probably not pregnant. I just can’t be rational when he’s next to me.”
“I’ll cover for you. You were sick. Half the restaurant saw you run off.”
“Oh, great. So how many are saying I’m pregnant?”
His face turned mutinous. “If I hear anyone gossiping, I’ll lay them out.”
I smacked his arm. “You will not. Officer of the law, remember? Gossip can’t hurt me. It’s no big deal.”
He tugged me into a quick hug. “I just don’t want you to deal with any of this yet. You’re so young. You have your whole life ahead of you. Fucking Christian.”
“Yeah, that’s the crux of the problem.” I couldn’t help grinning as I peered up at his scowl. “But I really care about him. He makes me happy. And crazy. But still happy. It’s just all so fast and I want to go slow and be rational.”
“Good luck with that in this town. I’m beginning to think they pump in baby juice through the air conditioning. The ultimate town planning setup. Just make sure we all keep having babies so the Cove is endlessly thriving.”
“You and your kind get the easy part.” I jammed my knuckles into his ribs.
“Do you want me to drive you home?”
“I think I can walk a block,” I said drily. “But thanks. I’ll call the Chief, let him know I’m not feeling well.” And I’d buy a pregnancy test too, just in case. Even if it was far too soon for it to read accurately, I was almost sure.
“If you’re certain you’re okay.”
“No, I’m not certain, but a ride home won’t make me so. Thanks though.” I swallowed hard as the worry for Christian reared its head again. Amazing how his newfound daughter and possible newfound baby—newfound to me in both cases—had wiped away my nerves about his stakeout. “Will you watch out for him?”
Mav’s brow furrowed. “You mean not kill him?”
I had to laugh. “Of course not. But that stakeout thing. Make sure he’s okay for me.” I waved a hand. “I know it’s his job and I’m being ridiculous and yes, I have to get used to it if we’re going to be anything. I’m just new at all of this, you know?”
“It’s your job too now. Not being in the field but handling the calls that come in.” Mav squeezed my upper arm. “He’ll be fine. It’s honestly just routine. We all pick up a couple of those shifts per year usually. The chances anything will even come of it are super rare.”
I looked at him dubiously as I followed him out of the bathroom. “If you say so.”
“I do. Trust your all-knowing brother.”
“Uh-huh. Trust Mav. Got it.”
I’d just keep telling myself that as I went home to sleep off my pregnancy. Should only take eight plus months or so.