Holding Her Heart by Melissa Tereze
12
Aster stareddown at her phone, frowning as she read the text message from Dom back to herself. It was a wonderful offer, but Aster had no idea why she’d been invited to have dinner with Blair and Dom this evening. The rest of the team had to be involved, surely, but it was short notice, and Aster didn’t take too kindly to that.
I should probably make an effort. She pushed the door open that led to the hallway, still staring down at her phone as she pressed the call button for the lift. She had an hour to herself, so she was headed out with her camera for some fresh air. The Three Graces needed some new snaps, and the dock was looking appealing this afternoon with the sun shining down on it. She would sit down to lunch there.
The bell dinged, and Aster walked straight inside, colliding with a body as she felt the suspension in the lift greet her. She looked up, startled. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Eden.”
“That’s okay,” Eden said, taking a slight step back. “I was in a world of my own, too.”
Aster flushed when her eyes landed on Eden’s cleavage. It wasn’t intentional; her boss was simply taller than her. Even more so in heels. “Well.” She cleared her throat. “I’m headed out for an hour before I finalise the images from the Carmichael wedding. I’ve spoken with Jules, and she’s happy with everything I’ve sent over.”
“You’re very efficient.”
Aster couldn’t help but notice how alluring Eden’s eyes were this afternoon. If she stared long enough, she was certain she’d get lost in them. “Just doing my job.” Her voice was hoarse as she spoke, but to hell with it. Her boss was drop dead gorgeous. “Can I bring you anything back?”
Eden glanced at her watch. “I have some free time. I could join you?”
“I…wouldn’t say no to that offer.” Careful! That tone could be considered flirtatious. “Like, it beats sitting alone in a bistro or whatever.” Okay, being cool didn’t suit Aster. She would take note of that.
“I don’t want to intrude on your free time, so I can step off now and let you get on with your lunch hour.” Eden offered a small smile, taking a step towards the door.
“No.” Aster planted her feet in front of the open doors, aware that she probably looked slightly idiotic. They hadn’t spoken since last week, Eden had unexpectedly taken time off work, but it was now Monday, and Aster knew she couldn’t avoid her boss forever. “Sorry. I’d like you to join me for lunch. If you still want to.”
“I do.” Eden smiled, the lift doors closing. “Did you have somewhere in mind?”
“The little Italian on the dock?”
Eden licked her lips. “Sounds like my kinda lunch.”
“You’re into Italian then?”
“Very much so,” Eden said, gripping her handbag on her shoulder. She wore a cream skirt suit, the colour complimenting her olive skin tone. “Who isn’t?”
“I should cook for you sometime.” Aster needed to curb her thoughts, but they were flowing out of her without a care in the world. Why, on God’s great earth, would Eden possibly want to have dinner with her? And at her own flat? Stop falling over yourself for this woman. Just because it hadn’t worked out with Esme didn’t mean Aster should turn her attention back to Eden. But it was hard not to. Eden was, well…Eden.
“That sounds lovely, but I’m not sure your girlfriend would approve. I expect your evenings are dedicated to her. A-as they should be.”
“Oh, that didn’t work out.” Aster wouldn’t explain why. Doing so would mean telling Eden how she felt about her.
Eden shifted slightly; her eyes glued to the metal doors. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“It’s no big deal.”
And then Eden turned around, that soft smile Aster loved playing on her lips. “I can’t remember the last time someone cooked for me. Maybe we could get together one evening and discuss upcoming events that require your services.”
“I’d offer you some fine food tonight, but I got the strangest text message from Dom a few minutes ago.” The lift reached the ground floor, the doors opening. “I’ve been invited to dinner tonight. I should decline because I have stuff to do at home, but that’s kinda rude, isn’t it?”
“Oh, you’re going tonight? Me too.” They walked side by side as they left the building, taking a right towards the dock. “I was thinking of getting there around 7. Blair doesn’t like it when we arrive too early; it puts her all out of sorts.”
“Maybe we could share a cab? No use paying double…”
“That works for me.”
“Who else is invited? I’m assuming the team will be there. I don’t know why Dom would invite me but not her friends.”
“You’re not her friend?”
Aster shook her head, moving slightly closer to Eden. When she did, she caught her sweet perfume. “No, I am. But the team is her base, not me.”
“Right. I see. Well, I’ve no idea who is going. I was told to be there this evening.”
“Then I suppose we should do as we’re told and be there.”
“Mmhmm.” Eden smirked, her soft features slightly sunkissed from the early hot weather they’d had.
Aster slowed her pace, clearing her throat. “So, I noticed you haven’t been at the office since last week. I was going to text you to see if you were okay, but I didn’t know if you wanted to hear from me. I’m sure the rest of the staff checked up on you…”
“I’m fine. Wasn’t feeling well.” Eden smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. Something was wrong.
“Right, well, it’s lovely to see you back.” Aster almost told Eden that she’d missed her, but that wasn’t appropriate. “Lunch wasn’t the same without you.”
Again, another slight smile from Eden but nothing like Aster was used to.
“You left the club kinda suddenly last week. I thought you’d fallen out with Blair.”
“She…didn’t like the idea of me dancing with Fi.” A slight blush settled on Eden’s cheeks. “But they have history, so I understand. We’ve cleared things up.”
“Yeah,” Aster said, running a hand through her hair. She didn’t like the idea of it either. “I was surprised to see you dancing with her. But it’s not like you were going to go home with her.” Aster laughed nervously, shaking her head. If she didn’t make light of it, she was likely to vomit all over Eden’s expensive heels. “You know what I mean.”
Eden stopped, an eyebrow quirked. “You’re rambling.”
“Sorry. It’s just that Fi is very unpredictable. I’m sure Blair was only protecting you. I mean, if she’d done what she usually does…kissed you…”
God, that thought weighed heavy in the pit of Aster’s stomach. In a world where Eden was dancing with Fi…Aster couldn’t think about it. She’d done so for days, and at more than one point, it had brought her to tears. Because Aster wanted to be that person. Her hands on Eden’s hips, her lips brushing her ear. Seeing Fi with Eden had impacted Aster more than she thought it would. Honestly, she was devastated as it unfolded before her eyes. And as Eden was pulled from the bar, it was at that point that Aster decided to call it a night with Esme. She couldn’t lead her on for the sake of trying to forget Eden. Because even though she knew she should move on, it was becoming increasingly clear that she couldn’t.
“What would you have done?” Eden pinned Aster with her stare, one hand on her hip.
Okay, Aster hadn’t expected that question. Eden was behaving strangely today. Think! Think! “I’d have told you to run a mile. Once Fi sets her sights on someone, she usually gets what she wants.”
“Well, Fi isn’t my type.” Something in Eden’s eyes changed. They darkened slightly, sending Aster’s head into a spin. If Aster focused hard enough, she would say that Eden was mentally undressing her. Sweet. Fucking. Jesus.
“R-right.”
And then Eden cleared her throat, gripping her handbag tighter. “Okay, so lunch. And then we’ll arrange this evening?”
“Y-yes. Sounds like a good day to me.”
* * *
The cab came to a stop outside Blair’s gated home. Aster rushed from the car, urgently tugging Eden’s door open and holding it while she stepped out. Once she was safely on the pavement, Aster turned to the driver and paid the fare. She turned back around to find Eden watching her, smiling. “What?”
“You have lovely manners.” Eden couldn’t recall the last time someone had held the door for her. Men…didn’t do that kind of thing anymore. At least, not the ones who gravitated towards Eden.
“Sorry, it’s probably annoying, but I was raised to have respect for people. And women deserve respect more than anyone else, so…”
Eden held out her arm, ushering Aster closer. It may be a bold move, but she wasn’t fighting how she felt anymore. She wouldn’t rush into anything, but she wouldn’t hold back either. Aster Bennett made her feel good, so she would enjoy it. And knowing that she was available only stirred everything up inside Eden. “Let’s walk in together, shall we?”
Aster tipped her chin slightly, sliding her arm through Eden’s as though they were about to enter a black-tie event. “Yes, madam.”
Eden couldn’t contain the grin that spread across her mouth. “Did anyone ever tell you how nice it is having you around?”
“N-no.” Though it was dark, Eden caught Aster blushing. “Thanks.”
“And I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to this evening. It’ll be nice to get to know one another outside of a work setting. I mean, I know we go out to clubs together, but it’s not really the same thing.” That wasn’t too much, was it?
“Yeah. You’re right. We should get to know one another outside work. But I hope you realise that doing so means we’ll be holiday shopping together for bikinis before we know it.”
“We…could,” Eden chanced, aware that she was likely overstepping. She didn’t do humour and sarcasm as well as Aster did. “Although, I’m sure you have your own friends to do that stuff with.”
“Hey, I’m open to the idea if you are. Maybe you could give me some tips on what’s hot and what’s not.”
“Tips?”
“You know the trends. I don’t.”
Eden side glanced at Aster as she pressed the bell. God, she was striking. “Oh, I don’t know. I’d say you were looking pretty dapper this evening, Miss Bennett.”
“Yeah?” Aster straightened, her smile wide as they waited to be greeted by Blair and Dom. “Maybe I need to find someone who appreciates it then.”
“People don’t appreciate it?” Eden frowned. “Why is that?”
“No idea, but I’ve spent most of my life single, so I’m cocking it all up somewhere along the way.” Aster slid a hand into her pocket, her navy-blue blazer and shirt very appealing this evening. “But at least you like it. That’s something. If nothing else, I have my boss’ approval.”
“Ugh. Can you not call me that when we’re outside the office? Actually, don’t call me it at all.” It had never bothered Eden before, but when Aster said it…very much so.
“No?”
Eden shook her head. “I hate it. It doesn’t have a very pleasant ring to it. Call me Eden, and that’s the end of it.”
“Yes, Eden.” Aster winked, sending Eden’s heart rate through the roof.
God, why is it suddenly really hot out here? And where the hell are they? Eden rang the doorbell again, tapping her heel against the Indian stone floor.
“Think they’re busy?” Aster wiggled her eyebrows.
And then Eden’s blood travelled south, imagining getting busy with Aster. “I…don’t know.”
“Why are you blushing? Us lot are forever having sex.” Aster visibly winced. “Except for me. I’m not having sex as often as half the lesbians around here.” She pushed out her bottom lip, and then burst into laughter. “Which works for me.”
“The team like to…put it around, don’t they?” Perhaps that wasn’t the right thing to say, but Eden had been shocked when Blair told her how many of the players had slept with one another as well as whoever they picked up on a night out.
“Mmhmm. And since I’m only a spectator, I thankfully don’t get tarred with that brush.”
“Good. You don’t look like the kind of woman to sleep around.”
“I have to be honest with you…” Aster paused. “You had me worried last week when you were with Fi. But I get the impression you’re similar to me…”
“How so?” This would be interesting.
“I prefer to connect with the right person. It’s important to me.”
“You’re absolutely right.”
“And if that fails, and I want to get my kicks, I have a box full of toys under the bed.”
Eden’s skin had to be hot to the touch; there was no way only her core temperature was rising. Every word Aster spoke had her on pins, wanting to hear more. She didn’t even have a response to the Fi comment. It was the least of her concerns.
And then the door flew open suddenly, Blair clearing her throat as she smiled. “Come on in. Sorry about the delay. Issue with the oven.”
Eden narrowed her eyes, disappointed when Aster unlinked their arms. But then Aster placed a hand on the small of Eden’s back, gentle and warm, and led her inside. That felt incredible. “It’s fine. We’ve been talking shit out here for ten minutes.”
“Oh, how terrible,” Blair laughed. Eden could swear her best friend was breathless.
Eden’s eyes flitted around Blair’s home. “Dom not around?”
“She’s…finishing getting ready.” Blair looked away, her cheeks red. She’d always been a terrible liar.
“Liar,” Eden whispered, spotting something on the stairs. “You may want to grab your lingerie from the bannister.”
Blair’s eyes widened as she suddenly backed up, almost tripping over her own feet. “Be right back. Make yourselves at home. But behave.”
Eden’s mouth fell open as she glanced between Blair and Aster. Did her best friend have no shame whatsoever? “Sorry about her.”
“Perfectly fine. They’re both good fun. Should I make us a drink since Blair has other things to take care of? Would that be okay?”
“Yes, please.” Eden swallowed as she watched Aster move around the kitchen, her black ankle-grazer jeans and pristine white Vans complementing her casual look. But it wasn’t her look that Eden was admiring. It was just Aster. All of her.
“Okay, red or white?” Aster spun around, her blonde hair falling into place.
Aware that she’d been caught staring, Eden moved towards the stools around the island and took a seat. Perhaps talking to Blair about all of this hadn’t been the wisest decision in the world. When she kept it to herself, it didn’t feel so intense. She’d fully expected Blair to tell her she was out of her mind, but the response had been positive, and it only encouraged Eden to want more. Throw in the intimate dinner, and Eden didn’t know how to feel about anything. Yes, Blair had run it by her first, but Eden felt dreadful for duping Aster. I want her to myself. Was that such a terrible thing?
“Eden?”
“R-red. Sorry.” She waved a hand. “World of my own again.”
Aster poured a glass of wine for Eden, rounding the counter and handing it over. She stepped a little closer, dipping her head towards Eden’s ear. Aster’s warm breath had Eden’s body on heightened alert. “Why are we the only two people here?”
Because I don’t want anyone else to have their hands, eyes, or attention on you. “I-I don’t know.” Eden still couldn’t bring herself to tell Aster that it was a plan of Blair’s. It all felt wrong when she thought of it like that. “Maybe the others are arriving later.”
“Yeah. Maybe.”
* * *
Dinner was exceptional, but Aster didn’t expect anything less from Blair. From the most incredible goat cheese and pear salad to start, the best lamb to ever enter her mouth for the main, and a salted caramel bombe for dessert, Aster felt as though she was ending her evening at a Michelin star restaurant. Blair had gone above and beyond to make sure Eden and Aster had everything they could need.
“That was…amazing.” Aster relaxed back into an outside chair, the patio heaters warming her face. “Thank you, Blair.”
“Any time,” Blair said, her hand resting on Dom’s thigh as she tipped her wine glass towards Aster. “I miss doing this, so I’m glad you could both make it.”
“The team didn’t want to come tonight?” Aster wasn’t complaining. It was nice to have some adult conversation. And with less people around, being with Eden felt much more intimate.
“Oh, I didn’t invite them.” Blair said, matter-of-factly. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but they don’t strike me as the kind who enjoy dinner parties.”
Okay, Blair made a good point. “No, they don’t.”
“And I love them, each and every one, but tonight I wanted something small and quiet. I’m sure I’ll never hear the end of it once they get wind of it, but I’m not concerned.”
“Hey, this is your place. You invite who you like. It’s not as though you don’t open your home to them enough as it is.”
“Aster is right,” Eden cut in, sitting beside Aster. As the breeze carried Eden’s perfume towards her, Aster found herself inhaling deeply but inconspicuously.
She chanced a look in Eden’s direction, immediately regretting it when her eyes landed on Eden’s thighs. She had to stop looking at her boss that way. It was unprofessional, and she was fairly certain Eden wouldn’t appreciate it. What the hell is wrong with you? She’d done so well until today.
Aster had never been the kind of woman to drool over anyone. She respected women’s bodies and what they chose to wear, but Eden had a way of captivating her without Aster knowing how.
“And I’ve had many gorgeous meals cooked for me by Blair, but this is your first time. So, how was it?” Eden asked, her eyes landing on Aster. They were intense, alluring, and bloody gorgeous.
“It was probably the best meal I’ve had in a long time. Onto a winner, mate.” Aster winked in Dom’s direction, gaining a grin from her friend. “Do you watch and let Blair get on with it?”
“Oh, absolutely. I’d never ruin dinner.” Dom held up a hand. “I know when I’m not needed, and dinner is always one of those times. I’d touch it and burn it.”
“Aster likes to cook,” Eden spoke suddenly. “And she’s offered to make dinner for me sometime.”
“Oh.” The lift of Blair’s eyebrows didn’t go unnoticed by Aster, nor did the wink Dom threw in her direction. “That’ll be nice.”
Aster’s cheeks immediately heated. Did that sound weird to Blair? She’d confided in her, but it was something she was beginning to regret. Aster didn’t appreciate the look Blair was giving her. It wasn’t fair to her that Blair was effectively dangling Eden in front of her. Still, she quickly recovered. “It’s…I never have anyone over at my place. If I’m not working, I’m visiting my dad. I thought it would be nice to do something normal with a friend.”
Blair’s eyes shifted from Aster to Eden, a sad smile curling on her mouth as Aster explained her reasons for offering to cook for Eden. She shouldn’t have to explain herself, but Aster knew Blair would only question her motives later. And what does that look mean?
“You’re both more than welcome to come along, too.”
Blair continued to switch her gaze between Aster and Eden. Was that the wrong thing to say, too? God, she was bad at this. It was no wonder she had a very small circle of friends—if she could call them that—and nobody else in her life.
“I think I’ll let Eden judge your culinary skills first. If she approves, we’ll join you next time.”
Eden appeared to relax next to Aster—something was going on.
Blair got to her feet, followed by Dom. “Another beer, Aster?”
Aster tipped her bottle, shrugging. “Sure. Thank you.”
“And you, Ede’s? Another red?”
“One more and then I think I’ll call a cab. Busy day tomorrow.”
Aster sat quietly when Blair and Dom vanished from the patio. This night had been wonderful, every last second of it, but she felt as though something had shifted between everyone here. Eden more so than anyone else. One minute she seemed happy, but now she looked as though the wind had been knocked out of her.
The silence was deafening. Aster didn’t cope too well without noise. “Did you want to share a cab home?”
“You stay. Hang out with Dom. I think she likes having someone on her wavelength around.”
Aster frowned. “I don’t want you to leave on your own.”
“How do you think I used to get from A to B in the past, Aster?” Eden turned, focusing fully on her. “You’re very sweet, but I am capable of travelling alone.”
Aster felt like an arsehole. This infatuation was getting out of hand. Yes, she wanted to see Eden safely to her door, but Eden was right. She could take care of herself. “Sorry.” She winced. “You…do your thing. I’ll mind my own business.”
“I’ll give Blair a hand with the drinks.”
“Right, yeah.” Aster cleared her throat, shaking her head as Eden stood and left her alone.
This had to stop. It really had to stop. Eden was professional, a businesswoman. Aster spent her days walking around with a bloody camera in her hand. And if she wasn’t careful, she would upset Eden and lose her job.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
She got to her feet, fixing the lapels of her blazer. It was time to leave and go home to have a serious word with herself. Dom would understand, and with any luck, she could sneak out the side gate without anyone noticing.
“Beer, mate.” Dom tapped Aster on the shoulder, startling her. “Nice cold one.”
“O-oh.” Aster shoved her hands in her pockets, checking she had her wallet and her phone. “I’m sorry, but I need to get off home. I’m sure you can drink it for me.”
“You’re leaving?”
Aster nodded. “Yeah. I remembered I had some work to get done before tomorrow morning. Don’t want to piss the boss off.”
“Eden won’t mind. She’s having a night off herself.”
“Dom,” Aster said, sighing. “I just need to go home, okay?” She gave Dom a knowing look. “And I need to do it right now before your fiancée encourages me to stay.”
“O-okay.” Dom took a step forward. “Everything okay?”
“Will be, yeah.” Aster threw her thumb over her shoulder, backing up towards the side gate. “Tell them I said goodnight, okay?”
“How are you getting home? You can’t walk the streets.”
“I’ll walk into town. I could do with some fresh air. And it’ll do me good…get rid of the twenty pounds Blair added to my waistline tonight.”
“Mate, do you like need to talk or something?” Dom looked as though she had something she needed to get off her chest, but Aster didn’t need to hear it. It was best to go home.
Aster held up a hand. “Nope. I’m good. Talking makes everything turn into a mess in my head. But everything is fine. Eden is my boss, and I need to remember that. It’s just harder than I thought it would be.”
“But I was talking to Blair, and she said Eden—”
“Dom, I’m good. To even think for one second that I would be lucky enough to discover Eden was miraculously gay was ridiculous. And you know what, even if she was…it wouldn’t make any difference to any of this.”
“Why?”
“Have you seen her?” Aster snorted. “I’m all for punching above my weight, but Jesus, no.”
“Um, let’s not forget that I was lucky enough to find Blair.”
“The two can’t be compared. Blair was actively looking and is gay. Eden isn’t looking for anything at all. And certainly not a woman.”
Dom chewed her lip. “Mate, I—”
“Thanks for a great evening. Bye, Dom.”
Aster shot out of the side entrance, relieved when she slid out of the electronic gates and onto the pavement without being dragged back inside. She felt terrible for leaving without saying goodbye, but she needed some space and a little time to work things out in her head. Tonight was kinda special, being Eden’s plus one in some way, but she couldn’t do that again. It only left her longing for something impossible. Aster may have been deeply attracted to Eden Kline, but she would also be stupid to contemplate the potentials for a second longer.